


Friends With Benefits

by paula_fnds



Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor, Friends With Benefits, Friendship, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:07:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 112,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27798223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paula_fnds/pseuds/paula_fnds
Summary: Claire just needed someone to work with her at the shop. Jamie just needed a job to pay the rent. What the two of them couldn't imagine was finding a friendship that could bring so many benefits.
Relationships: Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser
Comments: 1411
Kudos: 495





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!! I'm back!! 🤣🤭 I took some time off, but now I'm back with this story that I promise you that it will make you laugh and I hope that can help you relax during this tough time that we are living! ❤❤ So that is it! Let's see what you think about the first chapter! And I need to thank my wonderful friend and beta @silfraser that is always ready to help me with everything I need! ❤❤❤
> 
> You can find me on tumblr as well! 💻 paulafnds

_**POV Claire** _

Nothing could be worse than this, Valentine's Day, the only biker who was making the deliveries got hurt and I cannot make Frank, my almost ex-boyfriend, understand that I will not go out to dinner with him. Not even if I wanted to. I'm late with all the orders, more coming every minute and no prospect of someone wanting to help me with the deliveries so short notice.

That was my life in the moment. Almost 30 years old on my back, owner of a small flower shop in central London, practically single and with no prospect of paying off the debts I had made to open my own business after dropping out of medical school and annoying my whole family by becoming a flower seller! But even though my life seems like chaos to everyone who saw it from the outside, including those who are reading what I just described, I am very happy and fulfilled, well, not completely, I still need to solve all the problems mentioned above, except that they do not make me regret the decisions I made in the past and took me where I am today.

Well, almost all the decisions. I can say I regretted one. Frank. At first he seemed like the perfect guy. But that wouldn't be something my friend Geillis would say, she always found my relationship with Frank strange, she always managed to point out all the wrong things between us, things that I knew were true, only I didn't want to be proved wrong, I really wanted the relationship to work out. Why? Because for the first time I had attracted the attention of an older man, more responsible and who seemed to want something more than just a one-night stand. Something that I was tired of all the men I knew in London's pubs.

Not that I had much time to go to them. The flower shop drained all my time and energy, at the end of the day I just wanted my bed, which wasn't very far away, as I lived in the tiny one-bedroom apartment on top of my store. It was included in the rent and what I could pay at the time, but did not bother me, it smelled of flowers and the queen size bed that I managed to put with much effort in the only bedroom served me very well, thank you. But back to Frank, he was my opposite, history teacher, did not like to go to the busy bars in town, preferred some quiet restaurant to be able to talk about recent events and not recently of our country and Scotland, place of one of his most important studies.

So you ask yourselves, how did we meet? It wasn't in one of the bars that I occasionally went with my friend, but in the flower shop. He was looking for a gift for his mother and I couldn't resist the charm of a man so concerned about pleasing his genitor so much. I should have suspected that the giant bouquet of roses he had spent so much money on was not for his mother, with whom he hadn't spoken since he moved from his hometown to London, but one of his assistant students. I should have paid more attention to several details that went unnoticed, details that made no difference when I decided to make a surprise days before and caught him giving all attention to a flower that was not even close to the one I was holding in my arms.

But now was not the time to regret the end of my relationship, I had no time for that, I needed someone to make my deliveries before they cancelled the orders that were already late for more than hours. My Valentine's Day would be a failure, but I couldn't make my clients' too. I decided to follow Mary's advice, my saleswoman, partner and all the other functions I needed. She had stated that the best way to get a biker was to advertise on social networks, who wouldn't want to earn extra money to spend a holiday? I received some answers, but almost all demanded an absurd amount to make so many deliveries and at that time.

I was busy looking at the messages on my cell phone that I didn't hear the door open. I saw that Mary left my side quickly when a shadow took over the counter where she was sitting. Probably another customer wanting a last-minute gift for the important date, I would let Mary handle it because I was busy with something more urgent. What took my attention away from the phone was the deep voice and the strong Scottish accent, something I didn't often hear in that region. I lifted my head and saw Mary talking to a redheaded giant, yes, definitely Scottish!

I decided to turn my attention back to my previous task, he probably just wanted a present for his girlfriend. But soon I felt Mary's cold hands shaking me and talking so fast that I couldn't understand anything. “Mary!”. I yelled at her to stop talking, which worked. “Breathe and start all over again because I didn't understand a word you said!”

“He's interested in the delivery job!”, she spoke still fast, but with the words clearer. “And he accepts our conditions, he said he knows the region well and his motorcycle is fast!”. Her smile was from ear to ear when she finished speaking and I suspected that it had something more there than what seemed to be the resolution of our problem.

But what mattered was that he was willing to do everything we asked and most importantly, for the amount we could pay. I got up and went to meet our knight on wheels. He was distracted looking at the flowers exposed in the small window we had in front of the store and did not see me approaching. He was really a giant, I thought it was only because he was close to Mary who is a small woman, but he was still tall next to me who was not even by far a small woman, how could he be so skillful on a motorcycle with all this size? Well, it didn't matter, as long as he made the deliveries.

“Hi...”, and that's when I noticed that Mary hadn't said his name, I looked at her who just shrugged. “I'm sorry, my partner didn't tell me your name.” I saw that he got scared with my words and turned quickly. “Oh, it's James, but ye can call me Jamie.” And extended his hand to greet me. He seemed to be young, despite all the height and size, nothing that surprised me, to want to work in this position, probably just wanted extra money to spend the weekend in some bar.

“Jamie, a pleasure, I'm Claire, owner of Sassenach, in this case, this flower shop. And that is desperate with all the late deliveries. Mary said that you agree with our terms, so can I really count on you to save me on this Valentine's Day?” He opened a smile that made Mary sigh, I couldn't hold back the laughter, which left Jamie extremely shy. “Absolutely Sassenach...I mean Claire, oh Dhia!”, he stammered his last words and I laughed again. I was sure Mary would cause me trouble with this new delivery guy.

_**POV Jamie** _

I tried to open the door very carefully not to make too much noise, but of course, I was not successful, not when your neighbor and owner of your apartment apparently spends the whole day glued to the door listening to all and any noise that any resident makes, especially one who is late with the rent. “James Fraser! I thought you wouldn't come home today...was it a good night?”. Mrs. McNab spoke ironically as soon as she opened the door of her apartment. “Not so good...” I mumbled. “I promise I'll pay the rent by the end of the day, dinna fash!”

“That is what you told me yesterday before you left home, and the day before too ... Fraser, you know I like your family very much and so I rented the apartment for a lower amount, but I cannot pay my bills if I do not get my money ...” she said a little impatient. “I know Mrs. McNab, but I didna imagine I would be fired and even less that it would be so difficult to find something. I'm doing what I can to get all the money, I'm almost there and...” “Why don't you sell your motorcycle? It would pay at least six months of your rent.”

I was waiting for it; my sister couldn't get enough of saying that I had been irresponsible in spending all my savings on a simple motorcycle. But there was nothing simple about it, it was my boy's dream, the dream my father couldn't achieve for me and that I conquered with a lot of work in the family business, a job that I never liked, but that I put up with as much as I could. Working with my uncles was not easy, even more so when they liked to throw in my face that my father was never smart with finances and that my mother deserved something better.

I hadn't been fired, I had a good job and with a certain stability. As soon as I finished business school, something I did to please my father, I was invited by my uncles Colum and Dougal, my mother's brothers, to work in one of their companies in London. I should have been suspicious of such kindness coming from those two, they never did anything without gaining anything in return, but I had just lost my father and they offered something that I really wanted at the time. A fresh start in a new city, far from my parents' house, my sister and the painful memories of so many losses.

What began as a perfect job soon became a nightmare, with excessive demands and a very high pressure for me to take over Lallybroch, the property my father had left for my sister Jenny and my brother-in-law Ian. It was then that I understood the real intentions of that job, I should have suspected that they were not only helping their nephew in a difficult moment but that they wanted to buy something that they never had a chance and this bothered them a lot.

Lallybroch was the only legacy left by my parents, they had built from scratch and the property now produced wool and dairy products for most of Scotland. It wasn't as lucrative as my uncles' businesses, but the success of the Frasers bothered the Mackenzie brothers and they couldn't accept it. So I did what I thought was right, resigned and made a point of saying everything I thought about my dear uncles. Yeah, it hadn't been something clever, they ended up with all my chances of getting a new job in the same area, an area that I knew I was good at even though I didn't like it very much.

Now I was late with my rent, without any prospect of employment, without talking to my sister who thought I was an irresponsible idiot and a motorcycle that could pay any debt I had at the time, but my pride would not let me sell. Besides, it was Valentine's Day and I was alone once again. Not that I was looking for someone, I was still afraid to remember Laoghaire, the craziest girlfriend I had ever had. Ok, she had been the only more serious girlfriend, but anyway, it took me months to break up with her, simply because she could not understand, or accept, that we had nothing more. I still wondered why I accepted a suggestion from my sister, I would never accept loving advice from Jenny again.

After begging Mrs. McNab for more time to pay the rent, I entered my apartment and threw myself on the couch. I was totally lost, I had no idea how I would pay the rent that day or the next day, I was not totally out of money, but I still needed to eat and drink, yes, drinking was what I needed at that moment. It was still bright outside, but I didn't care, a shot of whisky wouldn't work miracles, but it would make things easier momentarily.

Before I could pour it for myself, my cell phone started vibrating on top of the counter catching my attention. They were messages from Angus, a cousin not so close, but who worked in the pub that I used to go to drown my sorrows, which at the moment were many. He was referring me to a job, a friend of his knew someone who knew this flower shop owner who was in urgent need of a biker to do deliveries of Valentine's Day. Ok, it wasn't the job I imagined, but I needed money and it wasn't the time for me to be judgmental. I abandoned my shot of whisky, got my stuff and went to the address indicated in the message.

When I arrived at the place, I came across the sign "Sassenach Flower Shop" and could not restrain the smile, the person was at least brave to use that name for her establishment, and knew a little of the history of Scotland. I hoped it would be a good sign, it wasn't the dream job, but I needed to keep it until I got something to pay my bills. I walked in and a bell on the door warned of my arrival. I saw that two women were sitting behind the small counter, but only one seemed to care about my presence and ran to meet me.

It was Mary, who seemed nervous about explaining me everything I should do in deliveries and the amount they were willing to pay. I agreed with everything, I was not in the position to demand anything and I knew they needed someone they could trust, the number of deliveries seemed absurd for the size of the store, so I figured that they depended on that money as much as I did. I made a point of saying that I knew the region well and that my motorcycle was fast. Mary just smiled timidly and without saying anything else ran to where the other woman was, they would probably decide whether to hire me or not.

I decided to give them a little privacy and went to take a look at the store, well, I didn't have much to look at, the place was small and simple, but the flowers were very well cared and beautiful. Not that I understood much of all that, I only knew what my mother had shown me from her garden in Lallybroch, this when I was still a boy who did not care much about the different colors that a rose could have. While I was trapped in memories of my mother, I got scared when I noticed that someone was talking to me.

“I'm sorry, my partner didn't tell me your name.” Had she asked me anything else? “Oh, it's James, but ye can call me Jamie.” And I reached out to greet her. Perfect, I was playing the fool for my future boss, so I imagined. She was not the person I imagined to be the owner of that flower shop, she was so young, with a look that didn't match with flowers. Ok, this thought sounded totally prejudicial, but when I thought about flowers, I remembered my mother, an older and more experienced person. Ok, I'm still totally out of line. She was different from what I had imagined and that was it.

“Jamie, a pleasure, I'm Claire, owner of Sassenach, in this case, this flower shop. And that is desperate with all the late deliveries. Mary said that you agree with our terms, so can I really count on you to save me on this Valentine's Day?” I opened a smile, I could really save her and save myself that day. At the same moment I saw Mary, who was leaning over the counter behind Claire, let out a sigh and Claire could not hold the laughter, which left me totally embarrassed. I was used to this reaction to my smile. I was overbearing, right? But I knew what could win over women, just was not what I wanted to do at the moment, far from it.

“Absolutely Sassenach... I mean, Claire, oh Dhia!”, and that's how I got another laugh from Claire. Points for you Jamie, playing the fool for the second time in less than ten minutes! “Shall we go to the deliveries then?” Claire spoke, now serious and determined. “I canna wait!” I smiled again but soon became serious to see that Mary remained leaning over the counter, leaving Claire slightly irritated. “Mary, show Jamie where the orders are, as well as he will have to carry and store everything. We have no more time to waste!”

And that's how I started working at Sassenach Flower Shop. Was it an easy day? Not a bit, I had no idea that delivering flowers was so difficult, but I managed to do everything I was asked to do and at the end of the day nothing took away the pleasure and smile on my face of delivering the rent money to Mrs. Mcnab.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So happy with all the comments and kudos!! Thank you so much for this warm reception!! ❤❤❤

_**POV Claire** _

I didn't believe we survived Valentine's Day, but it was true, Mary couldn't even breathe when she closed the register and all the orders for the day had been delivered, as well as the money received. Of course, if it hadn't been for Jamie to show up at that time, none of this would have been possible and at that moment I was thanking the mysterious person who had recommended him for the job.

We had very little time to talk, but by the little I had seen, he would be great for the delivery job, which I found strange after I saw the motorcycle he had. It was not even close to a motorcycle that an ordinary delivery man could afford to buy, but who was I to judge the need of others? After all, I had left medical school and spent all my parents' money to open a business that no one believed would work, which unfortunately until the moment was being true. It wasn't going totally bad, but it wasn't totally good yet.

Anyway, I breathed relieved when I closed the door of my shop that day and finally went upstairs to rest. When I put my head on the pillow, I checked my cell phone that had been abandoned in the madness of the day deliveries. There were several messages, among them some from Geillis asking me if anyone had gone to apply for the delivery job, if the guy her friend had recommended was good, hmm, so Jamie had been recommended by Geillis? I mean, by a friend of hers, anyway, I sent a message thanking her and saying that everything had gone well. I was still smiling when I saw several messages from Frank and my smile was gone instantly.

He really couldn't understand what a no was, or had absurd confidence in his very bad request for forgiveness. Who sends flowers to a flower shop owner? And typical flowers from Scotland, because of some legend he had told me one day and by the way I had not paid attention. But that was not the case, he could send me the rarest flowers in the world that nothing would make me forget the scene I witnessed. The face of that Sandy girl was marked in my memory and it was not pleasant to remember. I deleted all the messages without at least giving me the trouble to read, I knew I would only get angry and was too tired for that.

The next day my alarm clock rang early, earlier than I expected. But then I remembered that I would have to receive some flowers that I had ordered, rarer flowers that until then I had no money to buy and cultivate. Not that I did now, but I was risking what little I had left to see if it would result in a higher number of sales. When I went down to open the store, I was surprised to see Mary already behind the counter making notes on the computer. 

“I'm getting so tired that I forgot that you would open the store earlier?” I asked, scaring Mary that was focused on her task.

“Oh, no Claire, no, I decided to arrive early to leave the contract ready for Jamie to sign. I think after yesterday he passed the test to be our new delivery guy, right? And I don't want to risk losing him to another place...”, she finished talking at a lower volume and a shy smile. Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, that girl would give me trouble. “Hum, of course, we can't lose another delivery guy...” I murmured while biting my apple, that would be my breakfast until Mary stepped out of her daydream in front of the computer and made the coffee the way I liked it. Yes, I was lousy in the kitchen, I couldn't even make a cup of coffee to survive the long day of work. “Did you get all his information?” I asked while trying to peek at what she was writing.

“Yes...I asked yesterday, well, he e-mailed me the file...” Ok, Mary had already returned to her normal way of being, stuttering the words when she felt pressured by me, in this case, almost every day. But I didn't mean to, she was very sensitive. I stopped to read more carefully the information about Jamie. Okay, he really was Scottish, with a thousand traditional names and surnames. Hum, not as young as I imagined, but even younger than me, of course. Graduated in Administration? And why was he delivering flowers? I had promised not to judge, but I was doing exactly that. I decided to let Mary finish what she was doing and went to prepare myself to receive the new products.

The day after Valentine's Day didn't use to be busy and deep down, I was grateful. I was still tired and we didn't have many things to sell, I hadn't received many new items and the flowers we were growing in our greenhouse were far from ready to sell. I was checking some customer records with Mary when I heard the door of the store open, my reaction was quick and soon I regretted to look smiling at who was entering my establishment. He was not a new customer, he was Frank, with a very different look from mine. “Claire! You did not answer my messages! Did you get the flowers I sent you?” He bombarded me with questions as he approached the counter.

Mary was paralyzed staring at me without knowing what to do, I smiled and shook my head, confirming that everything was fine. She nodded in response and went to get busy with something in the back of the shop. “Frank, I had already made it clear that I didn't want to see you here anymore, even more at the time I'm working.” “You said this in a moment of anger, which I understand, but how to stop coming here to see you when you don't answer my messages?” He spoke in a way that only irritated me more, how could he be so cynical? “Didn't the lack of answers indicate that I am still angry and didn't want to talk to you and much less see you?” I spoke trying to restrain my voice so as not to scare Mary. “But yesterday was Valentine's Day! The day we met a year ago, the day your life changed!”

“Yes, the day my life changed for the worse! Frank, I'm going to ask you one more time, get out of my shop, out of my life, we don't have anything else to talk about and I hope I don't have to repeat all this one more time!”

“Claire, my dear, you can't throw away a whole year for something so silly, Sandy was throwing herself on me...”

“Oh, of course, she threw your head between her legs!” I screamed without caring who listened. “Frank! Get out now before I do something I regret!” I spoke as I pressed my hand over the counter. At that very moment, Frank leaned over the counter and grabbed my arms in a way that I couldn't move. “Let go of me!” I yelled, but he covered my mouth with his, in a forced and violent kiss.

“I think Claire was very clear, aye? Let her go now before ye regret entering here today.” I heard Jamie's deep voice coming from the door of the store. Frank stepped away from me, but still held my arms. He looked at Jamie and opened an ironic smile. “We're dating, she likes it when I do that, right Claire?”

“Dating? I think ye're wrong, lad!” Jamie spoke emphasizing the last word. “Claire and I are together and I have never heard of ye. Now I'm going to ask ye one more time politely, release my girlfriend and go away. We promise we winna report ye, right Sassenach?” He spoke looking at me calmly and that reassured me, even if momentarily. “Yes, of course...”, were the only words I could say.

“Sassenach? You really found a Scotsman who took seriously this ridiculous name of your flower shop.” As Frank laughed at his own observation, Jamie got closer and in agility I didn't imagine he had, he pulled Frank's arms tight, pulling him away from me and throwing him against the wall. “Patience isna my strong suit, especially when they offend my origin and my girlfriend! Ye have one minute to leave this store and never come back, and if ye try that again, know that I winna be good like I am now.” Jamie spoke by spitting the words in Frank's face while holding him up against the wall.

I saw that Frank's eyes closed briefly and with a little courage left in him, he smiled weakly at me and left without saying another word. I finally breathed relieved as I sat in my chair. “Are ye all right Sassenach? Eh, Claire...” Jamie corrected himself while kneeling on the side of my chair. “You can call me Sassenach, Jamie, I know you don't mean to offend.” and smile at him. “And I'm fine, yes, a little shocked, but fine...”

“Did he hurt ye? Do ye want me to take ye home?” Jamie looked at me in a way that I couldn't help but be grateful. He was really worried about me, a person he barely knew and who had no idea whether I was right about Frank or not. “No Jamie, you got here before he could do anything and don't worry, if I need to go home, it's just some stairs...” and I indicated with my head where the staircase leading to my apartment was. “Ah, ok...” he smiled shyly. “Thanks, really, I don't know if you still want to work here, but I promise this was the only crazy ex-boyfriend of my life, ok?”

Jamie laughed and we ended up relaxing a little. At that same minute, Mary finally showed up and I decided that talking about work was the best thing to end that heavy atmosphere that had arisen with Frank's presence.

_**POV Jamie** _

My hands were still shaking when Claire asked me to make a delivery, the first and apparently the only one of the day. I couldn't believe how a man could have the courage to do something like that Frank did with Claire. I won't say that I am a saint, that I never misused my charm and sympathy to win some woman over, but I never, under any circumstances, used violence to get and meet my wishes. For me this was something totally out of the question, my father was always firm in teaching me how to treat a woman well, the same way he treated my mother, with all the respect she deserved.

When I returned from my delivery, I saw that Claire was trying to make an arrangement of flowers to put in the store window, but her hands seemed not to cooperate with the little bow she wanted to tie. I laughed when I heard her cursing low so as not to scare Mary who was at the counter talking on the phone. Although I had been there only a day, I couldn't understand how Mary and Claire were friends and partners in that business, there was no greater opposite than the two, but it must be what they say, that opposites attract and complete each other, even in friendships.

“Do ye want help?” I spoke spontaneously when I saw another attempt by Claire with the arrangement. “Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ! Where did you come from?” she screamed scared as she heard me and soon after she turned around, seeing me standing behind her, laughing. “From the door?” I answered still laughing. “Funny ... but answering your question, no, I don't need help, I've made an arrangement like that more than a hundred times at least ...”

“Ok, but I've been watching ye for more than a minute now and the bow doesna seem to want to collaborate with ye today.”

“Since you've been watching me so much, make yourself at home! I want to see you do it without any difficulty!” she spoke in a threatening tone, but with a small smile in the corner of her mouth. “If I succeed, do I win anything?” I asked as I picked up the arrangement from her hands. “You do! A congratulation! That's as much as I can offer!” and crossed her arms while watching me. “I was waiting for something better, a shot of whisky maybe? In the pub around the corner?”

“I don't like whisky...” she answered with her arms still crossed, watching me closely. “I'll pretend I didna hear that...and after all, the shot of whisky would be for me, because I was the one who managed to make a perfect bow in this arrangement in a matter of seconds!” I smiled triumphantly as I handed her the arrangement ready. “What? But how? You were talking... you didn't know...” she was running over the words while staring at my work done.

“Congratulations Jamie, you've achieved something unprecedented! Leave Claire speechless...” Mary spoke up from the counter, taking us by surprise. But we couldn't stay serious for long and the three of us laughed. “What do ye say we relax after closing the shop at the pub around the corner?” I asked looking at Mary, I knew she would agree, even with her impending shyness every time I spoke to her. “Okay...” she agreed with a lower tone of voice.

“So, what do ye say Sassenach? Will I get my shot of whisky?” My winning smile still remained on my face while waiting for an answer. “Just one! And I don't want to hear about it anymore! I'm sure you only got it because I'd done half the work already, the bow was basically done...” she murmured while walking to the greenhouse, without looking at me to see what I would say. “Of course, I'm sure of it.” And I laughed once again at her stubbornness.

The rest of the day went by fast, even though I didn't need to stay in the store all the time since I had no deliveries to make. I ended up staying talking to Mary, giving some tips on how to improve the management of the accounts and clients they had, of course, all this under the curious looks of Claire, who didn't pronounce herself while taking care of her flowers, but that didn't miss a word of what we talked about. She thought she was being discreet when tilting her head to listen better, but little did she know that the giant mirror in the window revealed all her movements.

I helped Mary close the store. Claire had gone up to her apartment with the excuse that she wouldn't go with the dirty clothes to the pub, even though I told her several times that the place would probably be empty and it was dark enough for no one to notice a little stain on her blouse. As we waited for her, I noticed how nervous Mary was about being alone by my side and everything I tried to do to ease her nervousness always seemed to have the opposite effect. I preferred to remain silent and thanked immensely when I heard Claire's steps toward us.

I was right about the pub, it was empty except for some men in suits who were there with the same intention as ours, to relax after a long day of work. We picked a table at the back of the bar and I made a point to get the first round of drinks. Mary and Claire went for a beer while I went for whisky, even though I always thought that the English did not understand anything about what a good whisky was.

“Let's make a toast? To the team of Sassenach Flower Shop?” I spoke while handing the drinks to both of them. “Hum, someone is already full of himself after only one day of work!” Claire answered seriously. “Claire!” Mary looked at her seriously. “Dinna fash Mary, I ken she's not as tough as she seems, and I think I proved my efficiency after making all the deliveries yesterday in record time.” I spoke looking at Claire and lifting my glass in her direction.

“I see that there is no problem of self-esteem and ego.” She murmured in response. “That's why you're getting along so well.” Mary spoke softly while hiding behind her big glass of beer. “Mary! I can see that Jamie's presence has let you loose enough to speak your mind about me!”

“And she's right, isn't she?” I said it laughing. “Sassenach, let's toast before I get thirsty, and dinna fash, until the end of the night I'm sure we'll be best friends!”

She just rolled her eyes in response and finally we toasted. The conversation on the table soon developed, thanks to the great amount of alcohol that was being ingested by us, but I couldn't deny, I was having fun, both with Mary that was more loose, revealing Claire's secrets that left her embarrassed, and with Claire that to get back at her friend, started telling hilarious stories that had already happened in the short time of the flower shop, all, of course, involving Mary and some misunderstanding with a client.

After a few hours, Claire and I were alone, Mary was not used to drink and sleep late, so she ended the night just when she started to feel a little dizzy. I made a point of calling a cab and waiting until she was safe inside. When I returned to our table, I saw that Claire was looking at her cell phone and talking alone. “Is everything ok? Have I lost something important?” I asked as I sat down next to her. “No, I was just doing what I should have done a long time ago! There, Frank no longer exists in my personal life and neither online!” she spoke in anger while throwing her cell phone away on the table.

“Hey Sassenach, let's take it easy with that, aye?” and took the phone. “Let's not ruin one of yer work tools because of an idiot! And dinna fash, it's not just ye who has a clueless ex in yer life!”

“Tell me more then, I'll love to know that I'm not the only one who attracts crazy people...only in love life, don't be offended!” she spoke and leaned her glass against mine in a silent toast. “I didna, and who said I was normal?” I laughed and she soon joined me. “So, what is the story of your ex?” she asked leaning her elbow over the table, she really seemed interested in knowing my story. So, we spent the next few hours talking about our failed relationships and the crazy people who went through our lives. Of course, this didn't just include ex-boyfriends, family members didn't escape our anger and fun. We decided to end our evening when we were gently invited to leave because they were already closing the pub.

“You don't intend to leave with your motorcycle, I hope!” Claire spoke when we arrived in front of the shop. “I am not as irresponsible as I look! I just came to walk ye home, I'm a gentleman, I would never let a lady like ye walk alone at this hour in the street.”

“Oh sure, I'm a lady indeed...” she laughed ironically. “And you weren't even a little worried about your motorcycle that is worth my whole apartment, abandoned on this deserted street?”

“That was just the bonus of bringing ye here!” I laughed while really checking if everything was ok with my motorcycle. 

“Fraser, you're worthless!” she laughed. “But I'm going to assume Mary was right, we're very much alike and I'm sure we'll be good friends.”

“Sassenach!” I ran to her, lifting her arms and looking serious. “Are ye okay? Did the alcohol let ye confused? Delirious?”

“Idiot!” she hit me while I laughed, soon provoking her laugh too. “I am honored that you consider myself a friend, I promise to honor that title!” I spoke and bowed in front of her. “Fraser, go away before I regret everything I said!” We laughed and I got into the cab that was already waiting for me. “Good night Sassenach, promise that ye will control yerself and not dream about this wonderful new friend of yers!” I shouted from the car window.

She was already with her back to me, opening the door of the building. The only answer I got was a middle finger lifted in my direction. I laughed and at that moment I knew we would be great friends.


	3. Chapter 3

_**POV Claire** _

I opened my eyes and at the same time regretted it. Claire, when will you learn not to drink during the week? But all this was Jamie's fault, it was supposed to be just a toast, a shot of whisky for him, a beer for me and that's it, but apparently, it was much more than that because my head wouldn't stop throbbing while listening to my cell phone vibrating non-stop on the table. Well, at least I had put on the silent mode, some clever idea I had the night before!

Only then I realized that the reason my phone was vibrating non-stop was because I was late and it was not little! When I saw what time it was, I jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Something I regretted again, a dizziness took over me, as well as a slight nausea. Claire, you are too old for that! I took a deep breath and went under the shower, I had no time to feel sick or think about the nonsense I had said the night before to Jamie, the only thing that worried me was if Mary had made coffee, was the only liquid I thought to ingest at that moment.

When I went down to the shop, I saw that Mary was assisting a customer and I silently went to where she left the coffee bottle and almost jumped with happiness when I saw it was full. I didn't waste time and filled my cup, in the first sip I didn't contain the sigh of relief when I felt that hot liquid running through my body.

“The hangover is pretty bad!” The voice of a Scot full of himself almost made me knock over all the coffee. “Jesus Roosevelt Christ! Why do you have to come out of nowhere to always scare me? Is it a Scottish gift? Not making noise and killing others from a heart attack?” His laughter took over the space. I will confess that it was hard not to laugh in Jamie's presence, but at that moment my mood was not at its best and I restrained myself to just drink the rest of my coffee and ignore any silly remarks he was making about my hangover.

“Is everything ok Claire? I sent several messages and you didn't answer, I was starting to get worried...” Mary spoke in a tone that I knew was not ironic like Jamie's. “She's hungover, she cannot handle a few beers, but English is like that, they think they're better than us, only they cannot handle even a shot of whisky!” Jamie spoke before she could answer anything.

“Who said I'm hungover? Can't I want to sleep late after killing myself from working in MY business? And the Scots can even take more than one shot of whisky, but can they take orders from a Sassenach? Mary, Jamie doesn't have a delivery to make, does he?” I spoke seriously while taking another sip of my coffee. “And now you know her mood when she's hungover.” Mary spoke while handing Jamie a paper. “I said I'm not hungover!” I spoke louder, even with my head asking the opposite. “And did I ever say that I like to annoy my stubborn friends by the simple fact of being even more stubborn? That's another Scottish gift...” Jamie spoke with a smile on his face as he left to make the delivery.

I saw that Mary held the laugh and I just rolled my eyes, these two would give me trouble today. The rest of the morning I remained silent and isolated in the small office that I had in the back of the store, I was not in the mood to assist customers and even less to deal with Jamie and Mary together making fun of my lack of ability to handle alcohol. Deep down I knew it was just my headache talking louder, Jamie's mood was very similar to mine and I still praised him for getting Mary to joke about the way I treated her in my bad days.

I decided that my isolation was doing me more harm than good and went to my dear counter where Mary was concentrated behind the computer. When I sat down, I saw that she looked at me discreetly and by her way, I knew that she was pondering whether or not she would say something. “Mary, I won't bite you, the caffeine has done enough to make my mood a little better...” I spoke with a forced smile, which caused a slight laugh in her.

“Your orders have arrived.” She spoke pointing to three large boxes in the corner of the store. I couldn't hide my joy, I would finally have a decent piece of furniture in my house! The TV was for months leaning on a box of flowers, not that this was something unstyled, but I needed a bigger piece of furniture to put my collection of old movies and some things that were spread around my small apartment and had no place to be. But my joy didn't last long when Mary noticed the same thing I did. “I didn't know you set up furniture, I always find it so hard to follow the instructions that come with the box, by the way, how will you take these heavy boxes up there?”

“I do yoga for that!” I answered while thinking about how I would do exactly what Mary asked me. “I didna ken that yoga would make someone so strong Sassenach.” And once again this ridiculous Scot appeared in front of me without me at least noticing. “I'm getting good at scaring ye, aye?” He laughed when he saw me with my eyes wide open. “I'm going to start putting a bell around your neck, I don't want to have a heart attack before my 40th birthday!”

“I'm not going to look like a cow through the shop just because ye're getting old and have hearing problems...Mary always listens to me arrive, doesna she?” He spoke with a smile that I knew would make Mary agree with any nonsense he said. “Old? I'm about your age and my hearing is perfect, you bloody Scot!” I tried to offend him, but that was the only word I could think of while he was smiling in front of me. How he annoyed me with this way that even though I was so eager to wipe that silly smile off his face, I wanted to laugh with him.

“But getting back to the yoga thing, do ye really have the strength to carry these boxes up there? I saw when they delivered and I had to help Mary to put them here. Are ye sure ye dinna need help?” Jamie asked me more seriously now, but without letting the smile disappear completely from his face. “She does need help, probably to put everything together too...” Mary answered for me. “Mary! I have a lot of skill with my hands, I'm sure it will be easy to put this furniture together.” I said it with confidence while looking at the illustration that was in one of the boxes.

“Hum, skill with yer hands... I'm curious now!” Jamie spoke with a malicious smile on his face. “Idiot!” But I couldn't stop the laughter while hitting him in the arm. “All right, I assume I can't take the boxes upstairs, but the rest I manage on my own!”

“In the same way when you needed to set up your bookcase?” Mary screamed as she hurried out of my reach. “The bookcase was crooked because of London's humidity!” I shouted in response. “Aye, I've always noticed how crooked all the furniture is here in London, now it's explained!” Jamie spoke as he sat in my seat behind the counter.

I was ready to say something about it when my phone vibrated inside my apron pocket. I didn't use to get worried about notifications from my phone during working hours, but since the incident with Frank, I was always worried that he was trying something. I looked quickly and saw that there were several messages from Geillis, apparently, she was desperate to tell me something and I was always afraid of what could be when she was like this. I was not surprised to see that the big news she wanted to tell me involved a man, of course, Geillis was always meeting someone, always after someone or always trying to get me someone.

And this time it was all the options above. She had met a guy by an app, something I hated that she did because it always involved me, and he had set a date in a very popular restaurant in town, nothing too fancy, but also not very simple, and of course, he wouldn't go alone, since she had said that a friend had recently become single. Geillis always disapproved my relationship with Frank and could not be more radiant with the fact that I'm single again. But I didn't want to go on this date, I didn't want to meet someone now and even less a person I had never seen in my life! However, she was blackmailing me with the many times she accompanied me on Frank's commitments that I always ended up being alone and she was my only company. I took a deep breath and put my cell phone away, I'd figure it out later.

_**POV Jamie** _

I knew Claire was a proud woman and hated asking for help for anything, and I learned this in just two days of interaction, but fortunately, after much insistence from me and Mary, she finally agreed with my help to take the boxes up the stairs and set up her furniture, help, she stressed that word well. When we finished work, I took the three boxes and went near the stairs leading to Claire's apartment.

She finished closing everything and when she saw me holding the boxes, looked at me from top to bottom as if something was wrong. “Are you sure you're going to take all three at once? By that staircase?” she asked indignantly. “What's wrong with the stairs? And I've carried the boxes before, remember? They're not that heavy!” I answered without understanding what was wrong with them. “If they are so light like that, I could have carried them then!”

“They are light for me, Sassenach, now go ahead to show me the way, we have no time to lose, I want to sleep before midnight!”

“We won't take so long to set it up, it's a simple piece of furniture and I'm great with the screwdriver!”

“I'll only believe it after I see yer bookcase!” I answered laughing while listening to her snorting in front of me. I had to admit that the staircase was steeper than I imagined, but I didn't say anything while I felt a little sweat dripping down my forehead, caused by the effort of carrying those boxes, I wouldn't give Claire this satisfaction. When I finally entered her apartment, I looked around to see where I could leave the boxes. We would need space to set it up, but space was the least I had there. “Sassenach, why didna ye tell me ye lived in an apartment they used in the Lord of the Rings movie? Seriously, just a hobbit to get comfortable here!”

I left the boxes on the living room floor, which was also the kitchen and almost the bedroom. I knew I was a tall person, but there I really felt like a giant, one that didn't have much space to move around. “Look at this, in three steps I walk from yer living room to yer kitchen!” I said in indignation while showing her what I had just said. “Jamie! Stop it! My apartment is not for a hobbit, you are too tall! But I'm the one who lives here and you're just here to do me a favor, I promise I won't make you stay confined here for too long if it's so bad for your small body!”

“Sassenach, I may be tall, but so are ye! Seriously, even Mary would feel tight in this place!” She just rolled her eyes at my remarks. As I analyzed the rest of the small apartment, I saw that she went to her bedroom, well, what I assumed was her bedroom. She came back a few minutes later wearing sweatpants and a wide t-shirt. “My furniture set-up outfit!” she spoke with pride on her face. “I'm seeing yer work of art, the humidity in London really got in the way of yer perfect bookcase set up! Truly!” I couldn't resist and I laughed, Mary was right, the bookcase was very crooked and I could see in the corners that Claire had probably been frustrated at some point of the process and relieved her tension in the poor thing.

“If you stop talking about it and set up my furniture properly, I promise to buy a pizza and beer!” she spoke, stretching her hand to me. “Deal?”

“Aye! But can I choose the flavor?”

“No!” she answered quickly, she was serious but laughed while shaking my hand. The assembly of the small furniture for the TV was not something complicated, it was complicated for me to be able to stay quiet while Claire kept giving hunches to each piece and screw that I picked up. She had the instructions in hand and insisted that I wasn't doing the same as the drawing, that it would go wrong, that there were screws left over...I was trying my best not to answer to not extend the discussion, but we were both stubborn people, which resulted in more than two hours to assemble something that I alone would take half.

The tiny apartment hadn't helped either, it didn't have much mobility with the pieces thrown on the floor and I was a laughing stock for Claire who had fun every time I stepped on something or kicked the corner of her sofa, several times. In the end, I was exhausted, sweaty, barefoot and with my little toe hurting from the several hits I had suffered. “Despite the time it took, it turned ok, I think you deserve a beer, the pizza will take a little longer ...” Claire said while giving me a beer and analyzing my work.

“It turned out okay? It's perfectly assembled and if it wasn't for ye talking the whole time in my head besides this tiny room, I would have finished it hours ago!”

“If it wasn't for me talking, you would have done everything wrong, men and the panic of reading an instruction manual, I've never seen so much resistance in doing something right! And I've already told you that you're too tall and not my couch that chases your toe!” she laughed while taking a sip of her beer. I was so tired that I didn't even continue this discussion. I finally sat down on the couch and stretched my legs, how I needed to do that, even if I couldn't get totally comfortable, it was already better than the position I had been in the last hours. The beer came down in a pleasant way by my throat, it was hot and was a great way to refresh me. Claire was still admiring her new furniture but was surprised by the noise of the doorbell, apparently our pizza had arrived.

Before I could get up to fetch, she pushed me back to the couch and said quickly that I was supposed to rest because the pizza was what she had promised me. I had no strength to argue, I was hungry and knew it would not do me any good to fight with Claire about it. In less than ten minutes, we were both sitting on the floor of the room, eating and talking about random things. “Yer cell phone is ringing!” I said stating the obvious, she had listened.

“Leave it, it's not important and I don't like to talk while I'm eating!” she answered with disdain. “The person is being insistent, are ye sure it's not important?” I asked once more when I saw that the cell phone kept ringing. “Sassenach, by any chance is it Frank? Is he after ye again?” I looked at her seriously, I didn't want her to be afraid of that idiot.

“No, it's not him, I think that after your remark, he won't risk looking for me again! But thanks for worrying Jamie.” She smiled shyly, something I hadn't seen in her yet. Before I could say anything, her phone started vibrating on the table and as insistently as it did on the calls.

“Ahhh Geillis, how you piss me off!” Claire screamed while picking up her phone. I raised my eyebrow in question. “My friend, let's say she is very insistent, it must be something common among Scots!” she answered me with an ironic smile. “I see that yer circle of friends is very tasteful!”

“And who says you are part of my circle of friends?” she spoke seriously while reading what was on her phone. “Sassenach, I am in yer house, sweaty, lying on the floor of yer living room, sharing food and drink with ye, aye, I am already part of yer circle of friends!” I answered and winked at her. “I finally discovered something that you can't do!” she shouted victoriously.

“What are ye talking about?” I asked without understanding. “Did they ever tell you that you can't wink? You look like an owl when you do that.” She spoke while clearly imitating me. “But do you know what's worse? Women must think it's cute!” I just mumbled something and she laughed. “But what does yer friend Geillis want to talk to ye so badly?”

“Curious, huh?”

“A little, but it's not my fault that ye're a person who shares everything with a friend ye just met...”

“Who said I shared everything of my life with you?”

“Irony, Sassenach, irony...” I laughed while she showed me her tongue, very mature Claire. “Since you want to know so much, she wants me to go on a date with her, I mean, a date she set up with a guy and wants me to go together because he has a friend...ahh, you understand!” she got angry after noticing that she wasn't able to explain the situation.

“Hmm, so someone has a blind date...”

“No, if you haven't noticed, the calls and messages ignored by me have a reason!”

“But why dinna ye go Sassenach? Sometimes he can be yer Prince Charming who is lost out there, just waiting for the opportunity to meet ye!”

“Oh sure, because now my life has turned into a fairy tale and I'm a Disney princess!”

“Nah, princess doesna suit ye, at least not from Disney...maybe Fiona...” Before I could finish talking, I got a cushion on my head. “Sassenach! Ye made me knock over my piece of pizza! Cannot do that!”

“Maybe that way you'll learn to talk less!”

“Aye...but seriously now, why dinna ye want to go out with yer friend? The worst that can happen is that ye have a funny story to tell later!”

“You say this because you don't know Geillis, she always says that I'll be her company, that I need to go so she doesn't feel alone and at the first opportunity, she dumps me in a bar that I've never been before and with a clueless guy who thinks he's going to take me to bed! No, I don't feel like having this story to tell and it's not even a week since I left Frank!”

“But then why doesna she go alone? Since she sees no problem in leaving with the guy she set up the date?”

“Because she thinks I need to have more fun and meet more people, besides throwing in my face every time she helped me with Frank, even though she didn't like him.”

“I also think ye need to have more fun, relax this body and this ugly face that ye're making for me at the moment!” I laughed when I saw her getting angry at every word I said. “Ok, I have an idea to solve this problem with yer friend! Ye go on the date and if ye see that she is going to leave ye alone, ye call me and I will show up there to rescue ye!”

“Hum, it's not a bad idea, but...”

“But?”

“But I have a better one...” she spoke with her head down. “Why don't you go with me so she doesn't have to take a guy I don't know to be my date?”

“Sassenach!” I spoke loudly, making her wonder and raise her head to see me. “How cute, are ye asking me on a date?” I tried to be serious, but I started to laugh. “You are so silly! And immature! Forget what I asked you!” she said, already getting up off the floor. I got up faster than her and held her in an unexpected hug. “It's a joke Sassenach, it will be a pleasure to go out with ye and help ye with this problem, after all, friends are for this, no?” I felt her laughing against my shoulder.

“But what will I get out of it? A shot of whisky this time is not much.” And the answer I got was a push that made me fall on the couch while she showed me her tongue. I was not the only one immature in this friendship!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the comments and kudos!! You make me so happy, you have no idea! ❤❤❤

_**POV Claire** _

I have always been a person with few friends, since I was a child I have never been the popular girl who walked the school corridors with a group of friends. And in the beginning, it wasn't for lack of will, I always wanted to have a big circle of friends, but because of my parents' work, we always moved from one city to another, I couldn't stay more than two or three years in the same school, in the same place, and with that I always ended up hurting myself by losing the friends I had made in such a short time. So I decided that I would not suffer anymore, I learned that my company was the best I could have and it would not hurt me, much less get away from me.

Of course, this idea did not help at all for my trust in people and my suffering did not diminish as much as I expected, because several times people fought with me for being a difficult person to live with and this became worse as I got older. How could I have a serious relationship if I couldn't trust the person entirely? If I thought I could always do everything on my own and every kindness I received, would I give an answer that was not what the person expected? But one person had achieved the difficult mission of being my best friend and that was Geillis! I met her as soon as I entered medical school and with her impulsive, stubborn and crazy way, she was gaining space in my life, achieving something I didn't expect in a friendship; my trust.

Mary had also been another big surprise, although I thought she made a huge effort to be my friend because of her parents' friendship with my parents. They were the ones who welcomed us to London, after living as nomads for many years, my parents decided that it was time for them to take up residence in the city where they were born and that it would be perfect for me to attend university. Of course, they didn't imagine that I would drop everything and move to the opposite side of their home. But returning to Mary, I knew that she spent most of the time afraid to say something that I would not like or that could cause a fight, but even so, I trusted my partner for the decisions of the shop, I just could not share all my secrets as I did with Geillis, probably for fear of her losing the little respect she still had for me.

But now something was making me very confused and that something was Jamie Fraser! He had come into my life suddenly, I mean, in my shop and in a matter of hours, he achieved a feat that not even Geillis had achieved! My trust! Of course, I trusted my best friend, as I said before, but it took a few months and a lot of insistence on her part. However, Jamie hadn't made such an effort and the next thing I knew I was trusting my love life to him! Love life, what a joke Claire, this doesn't exist, what I have is a friend who thinks she is cupid and will find the love of her life in an app!

I was still a little apprehensive about this sudden friendship with Jamie, but I couldn't help feeling totally comfortable in his presence, even if he made me angry most of the time! The night that was supposed to be just to put together a piece of furniture, turned into a pizza night filled with lots of beer and laughter. Now I was faced with a Scottish giant sleeping all crooked on the small couch in my living room. He did not want to have slept in my house, wanted to leave because he was not a hobbit and never could sleep on my couch. But the tiredness and the beer spoke louder, when I saw him he slept while I was telling one more of my stories.

I didn’t want to wake him up and so I turned off the lights, letting him sleep on my couch. Now I could not hide the smile when I imagined what he would say to me when I woke him up. And how I had fun doing that! He widened his eyes when I called him, jumping off the couch at once and regretting in the same minute when he felt his back hurting, just like his neck that had spent the whole night in a totally wrong position. Not to be such a bad person, I gave him a cup of coffee, which Mary had already made, and sent him home to rest, he would not need to make deliveries that day.

“Sassenach, dinna think this will pay for the pain I am feeling now! And I still have to go out with ye tomorrow! This friendship is literally bringing me a lot of headaches!” He spoke trying to sound serious, but I could see the smile appear in the corner of his mouth. “Fraser, if you consider yourself my friend, since you don't get tired of saying it, you have to know that we don't measure favors and don't charge for them, friendship is that, isn't it?” I smiled ironically while he murmured something that was probably Gaelic and walked to the door.

The day at the flower shop passed quickly. Geillis was euphoric when she called me after receiving my message, I had confirmed that I would go with her to that restaurant, but that I would take someone, she didn't have to worry about keeping me company. I had been naive to think that she would not want more details about this someone who would be my date the next day, but I rushed to explain that it was just Jamie, a friend and nothing else. Did that convince her? Of course not! I just knew that to keep insisting on the same thing wouldn't make her change her mind, in the end she was happy to see a picture I had sent of Jamie.

The night of the date, which was not a date, at least not for me, had arrived and I was standing in front of the mirror trying to decide if that basic black dress was ok. It was my "official" date dress, but I was just going out with Jamie, I didn't have to worry about impressing someone with the few curves I liked on my body. But at the same time, we would go to a fancier restaurant, I couldn't go in jeans and a shirt, something that always made me comfortable. Why did Geillis choose this place? It wasn't her style, but this guy she had chosen likes fancy things and wanted to impress. Would he pay the whole check?

I turned my attention to the mirror, took a picture with my cell phone and sent it to my friend. She answered only with naughty emojis and finally said that Jamie would be an idiot if he did not like it. I took a deep breath and gave up answering that it was not a date, at least I knew the dress was fine. I looked at the time and knew I was late, I still had to try to tame my rebellious hair and put on some makeup to hide the dark circles under my eyes that were constant in my face lately.

At the time set, Jamie sent me a message saying that he was waiting for me in front of the shop. Of course, he was lazy and didn't want to go up to my apartment. I turned off the lights and carefully went downstairs, why had I chosen such a high heel? But it was the only pair that looked good with the dress and that made my overcoat stay at the right length not to drag on the floor. When I met Jamie, I saw that he was different than I was used to seeing him every day, not that there were many days that I knew him, but he had his hair all back in a man bun. He was still wearing the same old leather jacket, except that I could see that underneath was a button-down shirt.

“I see that we can be more presentable when we want!” he said when he saw me. “Are ye sure ye dinna wanna go alone? I bet ye'll be successful with this red lipstick!”

“You mean I'm not a presentable person in everyday life? And I've already told you that I'll pay your part of the check, you don't have to run away from tonight!” He just laughed and extended his arm giving me a helmet. “Oh no! Do you think I'll ruin my hair and makeup that took me more than half an hour to do? And I'm wearing a dress, Jamie!”

“And how do we get there? The restaurant is on the other side of the city!”

“Have you ever heard of a cab? They were invented to take people to several places in the city!” I spoke rolling my eyes. “If I had known, I would have told ye to meet me there...” he grumbled while he tied his helmets to the motorcycle.

“Jamie Fraser, always a gentleman!”

_**POV Jamie** _

We arrived at the restaurant a little late. Claire was not happy, we took a long time to find a cab and when we did, the driver did not know much about London, but he only told us this when he got lost for the second time. And she was even more irritated when I made the observation that if we had gone by motorcycle, we would already be in the restaurant drinking the wine she wanted so much, and for much less than the amount that the cab driver had charged.

When we got to the table that the famous Geillis was, Claire gave a smile that I knew was fake, she was not happy to be there. Her friend was not like I imagined, actually, I hadn't had time to imagine anything. She was redheaded as well as me and Scottish too, by the way, she made this observation when she greeted me, calling me Red Fox. Claire looked at her angry and sat quickly at the table without saying anything else. The guy Geillis was with was not a bad person to talk to, I made an effort to start a dialogue with him to give Claire space to talk with her friend. The problem was that he could only talk, um, about him!

I was still trying to find another topic to talk to Alec, when I heard a grunt coming from Claire, she was frustrated with something, I had already learned the different sounds she made when she felt something she couldn't express in words. I looked aside and saw that Geillis was looking at her satisfied. I looked back to Claire to try to understand what had happened and if I should interfere or not, but I didn't succeed in my mission.

“Red Fox!” Geillis spoke and received another crossed look from Claire. “Ok, Jamie, right? Claire told me that ye were lucky enough to meet Frank! I'm still surprised at how ye managed to put him in his proper place, ye cannot imagine how much I've controlled myself not to speak some truths to that wee teacher! But in respect to my dear friend, I contained myself in just looking with disdain. Not that he understood what that was! Ye were lucky ye didna ken him better to hear about his great research on Culloden! I dinna ken why he thought that just because I am Scottish, that I would want to spend the night talking about something I dinna like at all!”

“Geillis, he was just trying to find something in common with you to talk about!” Claire still spoke looking frustrated. “Are ye defending him? Really Claire Bear? Argh, that nickname made me nauseous every time I heard him call ye that!”

“Sasseenach, really? Claire Bear?” I tried to hold back the laughter. “I never imagined that ye liked affectionate nicknames like that!”

“Sasseenach? Hmm, as offensive as it sounds Claire, this relationship has had an improvement on the affectionate nickname!”

“What relationship? Geillis, I already told you that Jamie is my friend! And I never said I liked what Frank called me, but I didn't think it was right to say that to him...at least I wasn't offended!” she spoke seriously and looked at me. “Ouch! That way ye hurt me Sassenach!” I spoke emphasizing her nickname. “Ye said I could call ye that...after all it's the name of yer shop, so ye've offended yersel before I have!” Geillis laughed and Claire just drank her glass of wine.

“But since when has the night become all about me? Alec! My friend hasn't told me almost anything about you, she preferred to waste more time talking about Jamie, who is my friend, or my ex who she doesn't even like!” Claire said and smiled in a way I had never seen before, she was being mean and knew it very well. Her friend just looked at her in a defiant way and took Alec's arm, making the poor guy feel extremely uncomfortable. But I soon realized it was a lie, he didn't waste time talking about his life to Claire, who was shaking her head to show interest, but I knew that her only interest was the glass of wine she drank non-stop.

“Sassenach...” I spoke softly in her ear after having spent the last half hour hearing about how Alec had won a place in a super exclusive London club. “Ye're still paying the check, right? Because the amount of wine ye're drinking wasn't planned in my budget for tonight.” She looked at me seriously and took the bottle that was on the table. While she was filling her glass, she looked at me with an ironic smile on her face. “You are the worst companion I could have chosen!” she murmured the words in my ear. “Ah Claire Bear, ye move me with such affectionate words.”

“Fraser!” she spoke louder, making the looks of the table turn to us. “Stop it...please.” I noticed that her request had been like a plea I couldn't imagine hearing from her. I also saw that her eyes were filled with tears and regretted it immediately after my joke. What had Frank done to her? I thought I knew the whole story, that he had cheated on her with a student, but she didn't seem so hurt, in fact, she was totally enraged. Apparently, I was wrong, there was something there, something she hadn't told me and that made me worry. I tried to smile, I wanted to show that everything was fine, that I had understood the message and that I was there for her.

She returned the smile and turned her attention to the glass of wine again. The rest of the night was full of Geillis' stories about her adventures with the guys she knew through the app. Claire seemed to have relaxed a bit, but I didn't know if this had to do with the two empty wine bottles on the table. Alec was so focused on himself that he didn't bother to listen to what his companion was talking about other men. I tried several times to lighten the mood with jokes that only Claire understood, at least I was making her laugh again.

When we went to pay the check to leave, my heart almost went out of my chest when I saw the sum, it really wasn't what I had planned to spend, after all, until a few days ago I barely had any money to pay my rent! Claire seemed to notice my shock and took the paper out of my hand. “Don't worry Fraser, it's not today that you'll need to sell your motorcycle...or wash the dishes to pay the check!”

“Ye're right, after all this was our deal, wasn't it?” I had a slight smile on my face, hoping she wouldn't kill me after that comment. It was hard to keep up with Claire's mood swings that night. “But the cab is on you! It's the least you can do after making the woman pay for everything.” She spoke up, causing me to get stares from the waiter who was getting the money.

Aye, the wine had definitely brought Claire back to her usual way. When we got into the cab, I gave my address first, because my apartment was closer to the restaurant. I knew it wasn't right to let Claire go home alone afterwards, but she made sure she was ok and it was silly to go with her, she was already a big girl and she didn't need a nanny. The mood was still swaying, I had made a mistake.

Even my apartment being close, it still took more than fifteen minutes to get there. After spending all night talking, Claire seemed to adopt the silence in the car and I didn't care, this was better than provoking her anger once again. When we arrived in front of my building, I saw that Claire had fallen asleep on my shoulder. I must have suspected that she could not stay silent for long. I did not think twice before picking her up in my arms, I would not wake her up and was out of the question to let her go home alone. I only regretted remembering that I lived on the third floor of a building without an elevator and that people who drink a lot, get fully relaxed when they sleep, so three times heavier. 

The next morning, I was making coffee when I heard a "Fuck" coming from the couch in the living room. Claire had woken up and probably regretted the amount of wine ingested the night before. “Good morning Sassenach! Slept well?” I spoke with a smile on my face while walking to the room. “But...where? What happened? How?” she asked, stuttering and trying to understand what was happening.

“Ye slept in the cab and even tempted to leave you there to see what would happen to ye, since ye dinna need a nanny.” I said imitating her way of talking, she looked at me without understanding, aye, I don't think she remembered anything about the end of the night. “I was a gentleman that ye think I am not, and I brought ye home, in my arms, for three flights of stairs! Sassenach, has anyone ever said that ye sleep like a rock? I still have a pain in my back!” And a cushion came in my direction. “And you left me sleeping on the couch? And you call yourself a gentleman!”

“Of course, I wouldnae spend another night sleeping on the couch, no matter how much bigger it is than yers!” I laughed when I saw her rolling her eyes. “But even if I wanted to be a gentleman, ye kept whispering that I should let ye go, nearly beating me while sleeping. Ye are violent even in yer sleep! I dropped ye on the couch anyway, and before ye say anything, I left the blanket and a T-shirt for ye to wear. I promise I didna even see the moment ye took off yer dress!” I raised my hands in defense when she found out she wasn't wearing the clothes she left her house with. “I'll take your word for it because it's what's left to preserve my dignity!” she spoke while pulling the blanket to cover her body more.

“Coffee?” I offered her a cup and she promptly accepted. “Claire.” I spoke seriously while I sat on the armchair in front of the couch. She was surprised that I called her by her name and looked at me scared. “I dinna ken if ye wanna talk about it now or with me, but why were ye so upset with Geillis talking about Frank yesterday? Or when I joked about yer nickname?” She took another sip of coffee and looked at me seriously, but she wasn't angry, that I knew. I saw that she took a deep breath and settled down on the couch, trying to get comfortable. “It's a long story...”

“Today is Sunday...we have time!” I spoke as I approached her, putting my hand on her arm, I wanted her to feel comfortable to tell me anything, I wanted her to know that she could trust me with any secret. I was her friend, her best friend.


	5. Chapter 5

_**POV Claire** _

"Fuck" was the only word I could pronounce when I opened my eyes and felt my head explode. But I wish this was the only surprise of that morning, soon I was bombarded with information I don't know if I'd rather not know. Why did I insist on sabotaging myself like that? I always did it when I got irritated with something or someone, in the case of the night before, it had been both of them.

Geillis had put an end to my patience, which was no longer much for that event, when she insisted on the fact that Jamie was more than a friend that night and then made a point of remembering everything I had been through with Frank, things I was already tired of knowing, because she always made sure to throw it in my face, and on top of that, revealed things that I would rather Jamie never knew. And now I was sitting on the couch, taking a deep breath to start telling something that not even my best friend knew, well, at least not all the importance of the fact for me. Why could Jamie make me open up so much? While I hated this power he exercised over me in such a short time, I felt good to finally have someone to trust with my greatest secrets. How bizarre was this situation?

“Ok, you want to know why I was so bothered with Geillis yesterday... well, it's not something so unprecedented, she always provokes me in every possible way to make me lose my rationality and drink a whole bottle of wine...” At that moment Jamie raised his fingers, showing that there were two, I just rolled my eyes and continued what I was saying. “But I think you have noticed that she is not a person with much filter for what comes out of her mouth.”

“Claire.” Again using my name, he was really worried about me. “I ken yer friend likes to tease ye, because she did this to me when ye went to the bathroom, ye can relax that I ken we were not on a  _ date _ ” Seriously, I will kill Geiliis, she really said this to him? “But that's not all that left ye like that, when I called ye Claire Bear...” I noticed that he was measuring the words, afraid of my reaction. “I saw tears in yer eyes and it really scared me...”

I took another deep breath, he was right, I really held on not to cry, of course the amount of alcohol in my blood at that moment helped for that, but that nickname that everybody thought was affectionate, brought much more history than a simple affection from Frank.

“So let's start with the long story...when I was little, my parents were always a bit absent, not because they wanted to, but because their profession demanded it. My father is a doctor and my mother a university professor. My childhood was marked by the presence of several nannies who took care of and gave up on me. Yes, I was a somewhat agitated and difficult child.” Jamie tried to hold back the laughter so as not to interrupt my story, soon becoming serious again. “And I was, what you might call, daddy's little girl, I was always attached and spoiled by my father, in the little free time he had. And I loved every second he spent with his Claire Bear. Yeah, the nickname he gave me and for me it was something very important, but I grew up and when I gave up medical school to open a flower shop...well, it devastated my parents, but more than that, I let down my great hero. And from that day on, I went from being Claire Bear to just Claire, the daughter who spent all the money from her studies to start a business that embarrassed the family name, so that’s why I named Sassenach, I was just a foreigner, an outsider trying to fit in...”

I felt Jamie's arms wrapped around me and that made me breathe to continue the story. He didn't say anything and just held me in his arms, squeezing me tight as if it were encouraging words for me to keep telling what I wanted.

“Then came Frank...he always mocked the name of my business, since he is a history teacher, he made a point of saying that I was offending myself and other things that I preferred to ignore, after all he didn't need to understand, that was something that was mine and for me. But one day he came home while I was looking for an important document among the several boxes that were hidden in my closet. Of course, he became interested in the old photos I kept and started to look at them, making comments about my appearance and other funny jokes...until he found a picture of me with my father and in it had a special note, that's where he saw Claire Bear written... Well, I think you can understand what happened, he started to call me that, but he was never really affectionate, he was more ironic and hurt me...not only because of the lack of affection, but because it was something that belonged to my father, something that brought me good and bad memories, something that was still badly solved and hurt too much...in fact, still hurt. My parents and I started talking again, but I never came back to be Claire Bear...”

Now the tears I had held the night before were running down my face without me at least realizing it, I just noticed I was crying when I felt Jamie's fingers wiping them. He held me tighter and let me cry freely on his shoulder, without judging, questioning or diminishing me. I never liked to show my weaknesses to people, nor to my friends and even less to the only serious boyfriend I had. Yeah, I did not know why I had never fought with Frank for calling me by a nickname that brought me so much pain, but I did not want him to know what had happened to my parents, I did not want him to know that I was a disappointment, a weak person. Anyway, I had gotten rid of an idiot and now I was putting out everything I had kept for so long. What did this Jamie Fraser have? Because now I couldn't blame the alcohol or anything else.

We stayed like this for a few more minutes, in silence, only my sobs echoed through the room. But I felt that a weight had come off my shoulders and I was fine, as much as I was still hurt with my parents, except that this was something that wouldn't go away so soon and it wasn't at that moment that everything would work out. What ended up breaking the moment of silence was the growling of my stomach. Jamie laughed and said: “I guess someone didna eat much last night while drinking the wine bottles! Did ye want to save on the check?”

“It was the only option, since my  **_date_ ** did not help me to pay!” I said while trying, in vain, to make my hair stay out of my face.

“Hum, since I said I'm a gentleman, I'll take ye for breakfast, although at this hour, it's more like brunch!” He said and got me up from the couch along with him.

“So be even more gentleman and take me home, I cannot go anywhere like this!”

“Are ye sure ye want me to take ye home? Hungover? Wearing a dress? Or a T-shirt?

“Of course! Do you think I'll show up somewhere like this? Probably my makeup is all over the place and my hair...well, that doesn't need any comments!”

Half an hour later I was cursing at Jamie with all the words in my vocabulary, and let's say I have many! But he had alarmed me, I should have taken his questioning more seriously. Only at that moment I would never remember that he had a motorcycle and that it was made not to ride slowly, just like Jamie didn't have the slightest consideration for the passenger in his pillion. Result? I spent the entire way to my house worrying if I was showing off to the whole city, since I was wearing a dress, while trying to hold on to Jamie with all my strength thinking I would fall and my head was throbbing so much that I thought it would explode as soon as I took off that damn helmet. And let's not even comment on what happened to my hair after all this adventure.

At least I got my revenge by eating everything I could at my favorite restaurant. This made the veins on Jamie's face pop out at every order I made to the waiter, but in the end I split the check. Yeah, I was getting too soft because of this Scottish guy, I really started to believe that this was their gift!

_**POV Jamie** _

I didn't expect Claire to be so open with me, of course when I asked her why she was upset, I expected a story, a confession, but I never expected that there was so much she kept to herself and I felt special for gaining her trust with something so important. I preferred not to put into words what I felt when I heard what that ex-boyfriend had done, I knew that it was not the right time for her to have one more person judging her bad choices, and who was I to say something about wrong choices? I was still trying to get rid of an ex-girlfriend who didn't understand the word "limit".

Before I had the idea to take Claire to brunch, I had thought of staying at home all day so she could rest, I had even gone to pick up my motorcycle that was abandoned in front of the flower shop. But she deserved something special after entrusting me with such important things in her life. And in the end, Sunday brunch was so good that, even with the price of the check, it ended up becoming something of ours, as a tradition, not only to cure hangovers, but to catch up on everything that happened during the week with our lives.

After all, we spent almost every day together, both in the shop and in each other's house. I don't know how it happened, but now Claire had given me a freedom that probably neither Mary or Geillis had. A few days after work, I would go up with her to her apartment and we would share a pizza or something convenient. Claire didn't like to cook and I simply refused to use that tiny kitchen, I preferred to be unharmed from any accident, something that always happened in that very small apartment.

The days I was most inspired or with more money in my wallet, I would call, I mean, drag Claire to my apartment, where I would make the only healthy meal she would have in the week. “Seriously, can you really pay your rent and still have money to eat? Not to mention keeping that motorcycle of yours...”

“Sassenach, ye ask me this every time ye come here and I'm tired of saying that Mrs. McNab is a friend of the family, she charges a considerably low amount for what this apartment is worth and, incredible as it may seem, my boss is not as petty as it seems, she helps me a lot when she refuels my motorcycle every day before the work starts and thinks I dinna notice …”

“Hmm, really? Then you have to enjoy this kindness, it's not always that we find such understandable bosses. But Mary said that you would have daily assistance, it's not totally kindness...” She spoke trying to be indifferent. “All right, ye can relax that yer reputation of being a badass is still intact!” I answered as I pinched her lightly in the arm.

“Hey! I do you a favor and that's what I get in return?” She said angry while rubbing her arm. She sat on the couch pouting.

I laughed and sat down next to her, placing our beers on the coffee table. We were going to start another movie session, which was what we called our Friday night, aye, we were two people totally discouraged to go out to any place more hectic than the pub on the corner of the shop. I knew Claire's pout would last another two hours, as well as her complaints, after all it was my day to choose a movie and she always hated all my choices, which were far from any romance she loved.

And what did she do to strike back? She asked for everything I didn't like at our Sunday brunch! But that's what I liked about our friendship, one irritated the other as much as possible, but always in a fun way, we were ourselves in each other's presence, in this case, two children attached to adult bodies. I had already finished paying the check and getting ready to leave the restaurant when Claire looked at me with a forced smile.

“What is it?” I asked her looking suspicious, she continued with a broad smile. “Ahh no Sassenach, go quickly! Why do ye always let go to the restroom when we are already leaving any place? And when ye ken that I have time to go somewhere?”

“Ahh, stop being dramatic! Washing your motorcycle is not such an important commitment! And I still find it absurd how much you spend with your "daughter" She made a point of showing the quotes with her hands. She hated that I called my motorcycle that.

“Remember that she has to look beautiful for my job, which is to represent yer shop!”

She just rolled her eyes and ran to the restroom. I preferred to wait for her at the door of the restaurant, I wanted to stretch my legs a little and that would rush her too. But if I knew what I would find as soon as I put my feet out of the establishment, I would have waited for Claire at the table.

“Jamieeeee!”

Huh, that sound twisted my stomach. Why did she have to speak my name like she was moaning?

“Laoghaire...” and that's what I was able to say before she clung to me. I tried to take a step back, but I was trapped between the restaurant window and my ex-girlfriend with no notion of personal space.

“Jamie, how long has it been! How nice to find ye here, truly fate!” she was squeezing me harder and harder. “Ye dinna answer my messages anymore, I miss ye so much.”

“Why is that? Is it because we broke up three months ago and I'm tired of saying that I dinna want ye calling, texting me or showing up at my apartment uninvited?” I said angry while trying to get her away from my face.

“But...”

Before she could speak any more, I felt a hand on my shoulder, which turned me not so gently to the side.

“Hey soldier, I was looking for you...” Claire spoke with her face glued to mine, but in a volume that anyone close could hear.

And then she ran her hand over my neck and pulled me for a kiss. When her lips touched mine, I got scared and stood still for a while, not knowing what to do, but soon my hands went around her waist and pulled her closer to me, if that was even possible. Our kiss deepened and for an instant I forgot that she had probably done it to keep Laoghaire away, oh Dhia, Laoghaire! I suddenly pulled away and looked to the side, what I could see was a blond hair walking away from us and a satisfied smile on Claire's face.


	6. Chapter 6

_**POV Claire** _

I was satisfied! Jamie had helped me so much with the whole Frank thing, that when I saw that blonde on top of him, I didn't waste any time and ran to his rescue. Of course, before I did the crazy thing of pretending to be his girlfriend and kissing him, I paid attention to his body language and his look, he was extremely annoyed. Even knowing my friend for a short time, I could already identify in small movements and expressions that indicated what he was feeling at the moment. The fact that he told me that his ex-girlfriend was a shiny blonde who couldn't get off his feet also helped me a lot.

I thought it would be a quick kiss, but it seems that someone got excited in pretending and took everything much further than I had initially thought. I regretted it? Not a bit, just seeing that blonde leaving with an expression that would kill me if she had the chance, made it worth finding out that Jamie was a very good kisser. Speaking of my friend, I saw that he stayed a few minutes in silence trying to understand everything that had happened, but soon opened a smile and gave me a strong hug in gratitude.

We went back to my house, but as we had already spent the whole weekend together, we decided, in this case me, that it was better to give some time from each other's company. And before you ask me, I didn't want to avoid Jamie because of the kiss, none of that, it had been something totally between friends, unpretentious and just to do a favor. No big deal. I enjoyed being alone, I was used to it, but since Jamie came into my life, I rarely had time to be by myself and read a book in peace.

He didn't seem to mind either, claiming he was tired of seeing my face almost 24 hours a day. In fact, I knew he really wanted to take his _daughter_ for a ride and then take her to wash as he always did on Sunday. And remembering that Jamie's daughter was that blessed motorcycle that he seemed to love more than all the people in his life. And our isolation wouldn't be long since we would work together the next day.

It ended up that the week flew by that I couldn't even get tired of my friend's company. A festival was about to happen in the city, due to the beginning of spring and because of this we got many orders. Mary was euphoric about the amount of orders, but I was going crazy! Our flower shop was small and we were only getting so many orders because the larger ones had already sealed partnerships with the several famous establishments that would participate in that festival, leaving few alternatives for places not so famous and not so big. Could I complain? No. But I was doing it? Yes, incessantly for Jamie every time he entered the greenhouse to pick up an order for delivery. Why was I doing that? Because I didn't like to do a poor job and I wasn't able to do everything by myself.

“Sassenach...” I ignored my friend, I knew that tone, he was calling me out, probably because of my crazy behavior. “Claire!” he shouted and drew my attention. “It always works!” he smiled when he saw my amazement. “I ken ye're worried about not being able to handle everything, but for now we have no complaints, all the orders are coming out right and perfect. And before ye say anything, I ken I dinna understand about flowers, but the clients received everything with a smile on their faces and some still tipped me. So, take a deep breath and let's go to the last orders of the week. I promise I'll let ye choose the movie and the menu for tonight!”

“I hate that you always know the things I need to hear! But don't think that I will forget this promise you made! To be sure, can you repeat it while I record?” I laughed while getting a hug and a light slap on my back. “When you come back from this delivery, I won't be here anymore, I need to rest my back. But after Mary closes the shop you already know the way to my apartment, right? I'll leave the door unlocked.”

“And since when do ye lock it? In all these months I've known ye and I've been in yer apartment, I haven't had once found the door locked! Which I can say is not always good, I didna like to almost be hit on the head with a bottle of wine...”

“I've said more than a thousand times that I got scared, it was pure reflex to throw the bottle that was in my hand! And you already know that I hate your talent of not making noise when you get to places!”

“The problem is not me being silent, but ye being deaf!”

“Aren't you late to deliver this order?” I spoke rolling my eyes while he showed me the middle finger.

When I finally finished everything I had to do in the greenhouse, I let Mary know that I would go home and that she could close the shop as soon as Jamie returned. She just nodded while not losing the attention of the computer screen, yeah, that week had yielded good profits for our business. I really couldn't complain. I slowly climbed the stairs, I was very tired, but nothing that a good glass of wine wouldn't solve.

The problem is that I could not do what I wanted. When I opened the door of my apartment, I became aware of the mess and dirt that took over the small space! With the busy week, I had no time to do anything but eat, shower and sleep. I knew I could ignore it, after all Jamie was always there and I knew he wasn't the organization in person, after all I was also in his apartment a lot. But I refused to relax in the middle of that mess, I never could and it would not be now that I would become that kind of person.

I changed my clothes for something comfortable, in fact it was my official cleaning clothes, which was nothing more than old clothes that could no longer be worn in public. I also put on Spotify my favorite playlist and in a very high volume, I needed to get excited for the mission I had ahead. How could anyone not love the 2000's pop songs? They were the best ones to sing and dance in loud volume. I was so concentrated cleaning the floor and singing Justin Timberlake's "Mirrors" that I didn't notice that there was someone else in the room besides me. When I turned around singing the last high note of the song, I bumped into Jamie with his cell phone in his hand and red of laughter.

“Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!” I shouted letting go of the mop that was in my hand.

“Ouch, no Sassenach, it's just me, ye can continue yer performance, it was great entertainment.” He spoke still laughing and I noticed that he had recorded everything on his cell phone.

“The show is over! I don't like to share my talents...” I said it trying to stay calm while walking close to him. But he was taller and faster, and soon noticed that I was trying to get the phone from his hand. “Jamieeee” I shouted his name in an almost begging tone while trying in vain to jump to reach the device in his hand. He kept laughing. “You're a real idiot! I give up! You can keep this recording! Don't worry that one day I'll still find something against you and it won't be pretty!”

“Impossible Sassenach! I'm a serious person, I have nothing compromising...”

“Ah, of course, yeah, I believe you.” I rolled my eyes and sat down on the couch, I was tired. “Since I got tired of cleaning this house for your honorable visit, nothing fairer than you serving me with wine and food, whatever it is in the fridge.”

“I will only do this because ye gave me an unforgettable performance!” I just reciprocated this sentence by showing the middle finger. He laughed and went to do what I had asked for.

While he was getting the food and drinks, I turned on the TV and went looking for the movie to watch. I already had an idea in my mind, but a suggestion from Netflix made me smile satisfied. My revenge would start now and Jamie would regret recording my little show.

“Ahhh Sassenach! Not this movie!” he complained like a dissatisfied child.

“Why not? Do you have a more beautiful and romantic movie than Kate & Leopold?”

“Ah of course, a man who travels through time and finds the love of his life...” he said it rolling his eyes and making a Scottish noise that I knew showed great dissatisfaction.

“Do you want something more romantic than a love that overcomes the barrier of time?” I smiled contentedly as I picked up my glass of wine and settled my legs on Jamie's lap.

_**POV Jamie** _

I still couldn't believe the scene I had seen and recorded. I knew Claire would not forgive me for this and the revenge would come sooner or later, it would probably be much worse than watching her singing and dancing to Justin Timberlake. But I was happy to have something to throw in her face, since she always did this to me and I have to confess that I was happy to see her so relaxed doing something. The week had been hard at the shop and after the whole episode with that idiot ex-boyfriend I don't need to name, she deserved some time to have fun. Even if it was cleaning the house for my noble presence.

Remember the revenge I said that would come sooner or later? Well, it came much faster than I expected and it was in the form of a super romantic movie that Claire loved. Not that I don't like a bit of romance, but that was the most obvious thing and full of clichés, in short, a fairy tale that could never happen in real life. Not happy with making me watch it, Claire still insisted on commenting on the beauty and wonderful accent of the actor in the movie.

“Ye ken he's not even English, aye? This is an Australian trying to pretend to be an English duke living in America...” I said, rolling my eyes.

“For someone who is not interested in the movie, you know a lot about the main actor!”

“Of course I ken, he is Wolverine, by the way, he should remain only in this character, the best thing he did!

“It's not the best one! Have you seen "Les Misérables"? "The Greatest Showman"?” I denied with my head, of course I hadn't seen them, they were all musical and totally out of my personal taste. “Hmm, so I know what we'll be watching in the next few weeks! Then you'll see that Hugh Jackman is a complete package! He can sing, dance, act and is still a great Wolverine!”

“Ouch no Sassenach! Not musicals! And I dinna care if Hugh Jackman is a complete package, I'm glad to know he's Australian and doesn't have such a great accent!”

“Is that jealousy? Don't worry Fraser, you're still charming with your Scottish accent and I'm sure women still love it...even if they dream about Hugh Jackman!” she ended up laughing as she watched my face change.

“I'm not jealous and just with all this talking, ye missed a part of the movie!”

“Not a problem, I've watched it so many times that I even know the characters' lines!”

“And why are we watching this movie then?” I asked indignantly.

“Because I wanted to annoy you and also to remember that my love life is a failure!” she said while drinking the rest of the wine she had in her glass.

“Yer love life is not a failure and this movie is totally unreal, never that a guy from the 18th century will show up at yer apartment door and be madly in love with ye!” I told her while I was going to the kitchen to open another bottle of wine, I knew that night would be long.

“I won't say it's a total failure, but it seems I have the gift to choose the wrong guys, the most complicated, strangers...and unfortunately every woman dreams of a prince charming coming to pick her up on a white horse.”

“Really Sassenach? I didna imagine ye were the kind of woman who was waiting for a prince charming...”

“Why not? What's wrong with me wanting that? I'm different with you because we're friends, now when it's with a boyfriend...well, you met Frank and you know what he did to me!”

“There's nothing wrong, it's just that I always imagined ye as an independent woman who doesn't need a prince to be happy in life!”

“I am happy! But having company is always much better!”

“Ye have company!” I said it and filled her glass with wine.

“But you're not a valid one!”

“I'm offended now!” I pretended to be hurt and she just showed her tongue to me. “But what ye were saying about always choosing the wrong men, I also had no luck with the women I went out with. One was too egocentric, one was clingy and crazy...in short, never let your sister choose the right person for ye, she will always be wrong!”

We laughed and drank more wine. I kept thinking about our relationships and how hard it was to find a person who understood you completely, who respected your space and the sex was perfect. I looked at Claire while drinking. She was tossed on the couch, with her feet on me as she always did, not caring what I would think of her posture, her wine stained clothes and her totally messy hair. Between us she didn't have that feeling, of having to measure the movements and what she would talk about for fear of hurting the other. It seemed that everything fit perfectly between us, including the kiss.

“What if we were friends with benefits?” I spoke suddenly, not knowing how the words had come out of my mouth.

“What? What other benefits do you want from me besides always being in my house, eating all my food and drinking my beverages?”

“It's not that! Weren't ye saying how complicated it is to find a perfect relationship?”

“Actually, I said it's hard to find a perfect man...where are you going with this Jamie?”

“I think we should get laid.”

“WHAT?” she screamed, almost spitting the wine.

“We are both single, frustrated and get along very well, there are no demands between us...”

“Of course, because we are friends and not lovers!” she spoke, interrupting me.

“But why not be friends with benefits? We would combine business with pleasure! In this case, only the good part of a relationship, the sex and the fact that we know well what each one likes.”

She stood staring at me, seeming to analyze everything I had said. For a brief moment I thought I could have spoiled things between us with this quite crazy proposal, but soon I saw a smile appear in the corner of her mouth:

“Fraser, I can say that I found your proposal a little crazy at first, but now thinking about it, it's not bad at all! We can talk about what we like without being afraid of the other judging and I really need to release some of the stress I've been feeling lately...” she said laughing and drinking all the wine in her glass.

The subject seemed to die at the moment while we drank more wine and discussed more about why our previous relationships had not worked out. More than an hour had passed and the second bottle of wine had already finished, as well as the movie that was totally ignored. I was still sitting on the couch, but now almost lying down, since Claire had sat on the floor after I insisted that that couch was tiny for both of us to stay on it for a long time. I was laughing at something she had said, when I saw that she got serious looking at me and in a fast move that I did not expect, she jumped on top of me on the couch and with her lips practically over mine, she said:

“Let's do it!” and kissed me. Of course, I couldn't avoid kissing her back, but what was happening? Were we really going to do what I was thinking? With difficulty, I managed to gently push her away and I must confess that her lying on top of me was not helping at all!

“Sassenach, are ye sure? Do ye really wanna do this? And everything will stay the same, aye?”

“Sure! Isn't that what you proposed? I'm sure these benefits will be great! But I think we should clarify what each one likes, starting that I don't like to stay on this uncomfortable couch, I also don't like to do anything with the lights completely on, and before you ask me, no, I'm not ashamed of my body, but the light on irritates me...” and she wouldn't stop talking.

“Claire!” I yelled to see if she could hear me, and of course, it worked. “Relax! First of all, I want ye to stand up because if ye really think doing anything on this couch is uncomfortable, lying on top of me and stirring, it won't help at all! And I will follow everything ye said, but I want ye to enjoy it...”

She smiled shyly and got off me. I stood up, took her hand and took her into the bedroom. I did exactly as she asked, left only the light of the little lamp on and pulled her close to me.

“Oh, I also don't like...” but I didn't let her talk anymore.

“Sassenach” and to stop her from talking more, I put my finger in front of her lips “Relax and leave it to me!” and to not give her a chance to argue, that I knew she would try, I kissed her.

Our kiss was a little shy at first, both still trying to understand us in this territory until now not explored of our friendship. But it didn't take much for us to get comfortable with each other's mouths and I started to explore other parts of her body. I knew she still wanted to say something, she wanted to explain, to show that she was not nervous or apprehensive. But I knew her and I knew that when she was shooting a thousand words per second, it was because she was nervous and I wanted to do everything for her to really enjoy that moment.

I went down kissing her neck, putting her hair behind her ear and she threw back her head so that I had more access. When I intensified the kisses with light bites, I felt her body relaxing under my hands and this gave me the confidence to continue what I was doing. Her hands slowly explored my body as well, lifting my shirt slowly, but soon being more sure when I encouraged her to do what she wanted.

I stopped kissing her to take off her shirt and I was surprised when I saw that she was without a bra. I didn't hesitate to return with my kisses, but now for the rest of her body as I laid her on the bed. Before I could continue what I was doing, she murmured that now it was my turn and took off my shirt. The shyness that seemed to be present at first, disappeared completely from Claire as we took off our last pieces of clothing.

From that moment on, all delicacy and restraint disappeared and I could only be grateful for having made this proposal. We were taking advantage of each other's body, whispering words interspersed with what each one liked, like bites, kisses and caresses in specific areas. Claire was managing to drive me crazy with her hands that seemed so delicate when dealing with the flowers, but that made magic on my body. I was running along her long legs with kisses, when I felt a tension taking over Claire's body when I bit the inside of her thigh. I looked into her eyes and she smiled shyly.

“Dinna ye like what I'm doing Sassenach?” I asked as I slowly brushed my face against her leg.

“Jamie...I...is that I...” I noticed her getting red on her face and trying to get her legs away from my face. And that's when I understood what was happening.

“If ye want, I can stop, but I'm sure ye won't regret it.” I smiled in a way that I knew I would leave her embarrassed, but now I was on a mission, I would give her pleasure like she had never received before.

She nodded and relaxed in my hands. Her legs gradually opened up and I went slowly to my destination. I was focused on my movements, with my mouth and my fingers, but I couldn't hide the satisfaction in my face when I heard her moaning and screaming my name without stopping. Yes, my mission had been successful.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So happy and greatful for all the comments I've received until now. You are all amazing!! ❤❤❤❤ I really hope everybody have a great week even with everything that is happening!

_**POV Claire** _

Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ. Had this really happened? My breath was still shaken, my vision darkened, but the sensation that flowed through my body was one of total satisfaction. Why had I never tried this before? Simple, because I only had extremely selfish boyfriends who only thought about their pleasure. And who would have thought that would be my best friend who would think more about me and what I should feel? Yes, best friend, Jamie, who at that moment was doing wonderful things with my body.

I must confess I was nervous at the beginning of our madness. I knew I had accepted Jamie's proposal, but I was drinking wine and totally stuck in our discussion about Hugh Jackman being a perfect man and how I would never have anything like that in my life. But when things became real, an unusual nervousness took over my body and if it hadn't been for my friend to take the initiative, I probably would have given it all up. Well, I don't know if I would have really given up, especially after seeing Jamie without clothes on and everything he could do with his hands and mouth.

But back to what we were doing. My shyness and nervousness had become totally absent after my first wave of pleasure, this proposal really was the best thing we could have done. But now I wanted more and I didn't waste time pulling Jamie on me, I needed more and I couldn’t wait any longer. He only smiled satisfied when I demanded more than quickly what I wanted. While I felt his kisses on my body and his hands go through my legs, opening them to accommodate himself between them, I tried to reach the drawer of my bedside table, but without success.

“Sassenach...” Jamie spoke a little breathlessly. “Are ye so disinterested in what I'm doing that ye wanna get a book to read?”

“No, actually I want to get something that we really need right now.” I answered as I tried once again to stretch my hand, but Jamie's weight on me made it almost impossible.

I saw that he went over me and opened the drawer I wanted so much. When he saw what was inside, he finally understood my mission and didn't hide the laughter.

“I had no idea ye were such an active woman, Sassenach!” he laughed again while showing me the giant box of condoms.

“It was on sale...but after all, are you going to just stare or will you use it as recommended in the instructions?”

I didn't need to say it again, he smiled maliciously while I raised an eyebrow and laughed when I saw his despair to open the package. Even though it seemed that the moment had been broken, the most enjoyable thing to do with a friend is that we didn't have the pressure to do things following a pre-established protocol to please the partner. Things flowed naturally and I can say that when Jamie resumed what he was doing before, he followed to the letter my instructions to give me more pleasure and without any kindness. Our movements were synchronized and I was finally discovering what it was really like to have a partner who knew how to reach parts of my body that not even I knew existed. I knew I wasn't being silent, I knew he would comment on it later, but it was stronger than me and when I least expected it, I was screaming for Jamie as I reached the second orgasm of the night.

He didn't take long to get to the same point that I was seconds before and soon he was lying next to me in my small bed. I didn't have to look at Jamie to know he had a satisfied smile on his face as he regained the normal rhythm of his breathing. But I still couldn't resist and looked at my best friend's face and what I noticed was the same thing that was probably reflected in mine too. I felt his hand on my leg and his words came out punctuated.

“Why didna we try this before?”

“I don't know Jamie, I really don't know...” and those were my last words before the tiredness took over my body and my eyes couldn't stay open.

The next day I woke up feeling something pulling my hair, something not pleasant to feel in the first hours of the day. I opened my eyes slowly and at that moment I thanked what was holding me by my hair, because if it were not for that, I would be on the floor. And what had caused all that? My dear giant Scottish friend with no notion of space, or in this case, of sharing space. He had spread all over the bed, pushing me to the edge as well as holding part of my hair under his shoulder. Great, I already knew I wouldn't share my bed with him anymore.

“Good morning Sassenach...I can feel yer anger from here.” He spoke with an intense accent, probably because he was still sleepy.

“And why is that? You, besides sleeping in my bed, almost knocked me out of it and held my hair with that delicate arm of yours!”

“And to think that yesterday ye were screaming my name and asking for more of my delicacy...” he smiled maliciously while I hit him. “But Sassenach, I already told ye that this is yer place’s fault, everything here is made for people other than those who live here!”

“People? Let me just inform you that I am the only one who lives here and I was doing very well before you invaded my space!”

“Next time, let's go to my house where my king size bed won't cause any inconvenience to yer beautiful body...” and without at least giving me time to react, he hit my ass.

“Hey!” of course it was at that moment that I realized that we were talking still totally naked, and I hadn't even stopped to notice or care. “Next time? So are we going to continue with this?” I asked as I pointed at the two of us.

“Wasn't that the deal yesterday?” he looked at me confused.

“Ah, it was, but we didn't go too deep in the terms of your proposal...”

“Because ye just jumped on me and didna let me say anything else!” he laughed while he saw my angry face. “Ok, now we have time, what terms do ye wanna discuss?”

I was silent for a while, after all, did I know that we wanted to discuss? The night before had been wonderful, it had been a long time since I had had such good sex, or had I never had someone who made me feel the way Jamie did? Well, either way, his idea had really been good. I had relaxed, really enjoyed it and best of all, nothing had gotten weird between us! We were talking and provoking each other as usual, of course the provocations got a little more daring, but still we were comfortable with each other and that was the goal of everything, right?

“Sassenach, if ye take longer to think, I'll go back to sleep after all today is my day off and ye've exhausted me too much...” I looked at him raising an eyebrow, he laughed and completed “at work, this week was intense!”

“Before you continue with those double meaning jokes, let's go to the terms of your proposal. Actually, I don't think there will be many and if you don't agree, well, the loss is yours!”

“Um, someone is full of herself...”

“We can go out with other people.” I said it interrupting him. “After all, we're just friends, but if what we have with those people starts to get serious or involves sex, our agreement will automatically be suspended.”

“So, we'll be friends, but with exclusive sex between us?”

“Yes! But if things get weird and start to affect our friendship, we stop. And of course, if we meet someone.”

“And to suspend the deal? Just say the word? No hard feelings?”

“Of course not! And why would I have resentments? We're just friends and we're doing it just to fulfill a need!”

“Oh of course... yers, in case...” he laughed, but not before he got a slap for his words. “All right Sassenach, I'm happy to fulfill yer needs! Done deal!” and another slap on my ass.

“It's going to be like that now, is it?”

“Aye.” He spoke with a smile on his face while he put on his underwear and went to make coffee. Yes, he knew how to make coffee as good as Mary and I was in great need of caffeine that morning.

After I was dressed and forced Jamie to do the same, we had our coffee in silence while updating from our social networks. Half an hour later I was getting comments on how insensitive I was to putting Jamie out of the house. I needed to work on my plants in the greenhouse and he would just disturb me. And we weren't born glued together, I see him almost every day and I need some time alone, the same way I knew he needed too.

_**POV Jamie** _

After being practically thrown out of Claire's house, I went to my apartment and received a look of disapproval from Mrs. McNab for being back home in the same clothes as the day before. She really enjoyed watching the life of everyone in that building, but I still thought that with me it was more than special attention. I wondered if it was my dear sister who asked her to do this, but I never dared to say this to Jenny, because if it wasn't true, it could end up becoming an idea that I wouldn't like at all.

I went to take a shower, after all as my dear neighbor had observed, I had stayed out since the day before and the activities had been intense. I laughed when I remembered everything that had happened, were we crazy to go on this deal? At least we would be crazy and satisfied, I could never imagine that the sex with Claire would be so good. In fact, until the night before this idea had never crossed my mind, after all I only saw her as my friend. We had intimacy with each other, but nothing beyond a hug or her using me as a support to get more comfortable on the couch.

When I left the bathroom, I stopped in front of the mirror to fix my hair and found a giant bite mark on my neck. How had I not seen this before? Now it's explained Mrs. McNab's disapproving look, I should have been suspicious when she asked me if the night had been good. I got my cell phone and took a picture of my neck, then sent a message to Claire: "Sassenach, my good boy’s image was totally denigrated because of you! Now Mrs. McNab will never believe that I earn money honestly by delivering flowers..."

The answer didn't take long to come and I didn't hold my laugh when I saw the picture. It was Claire's legs with bite marks: "Good boy? I just returned what you did to me. Lucky for you I don't go out there showing my legs". Yeah, I think we got a little carried away last night. "New term of our agreement: no bites! At least not in visible places. Okay?". She just answered me with an emoji that showed how pleased she was with my teasing. The rest of my weekend was more peaceful than I had imagined. Claire didn't want to go to our Sunday brunch, she said she was still tired of me and needed to do some flower research for the shop.

For a moment I thought that she regretted what we had done and she didn't want to face me in order to not be embarrassed. But soon I rejected the idea when she sent me a picture of a flower that looked a lot like the female intimate part and I knew that my friend didn't have an ounce of shame or resentment. We ended up spending the rest of Sunday night exchanging messages with nonsense that nobody would understand. Aye, I had nothing to worry about, we were still the same as always and with the advantage that I could have sex whenever I wanted, and what sex!

The next morning when I arrived at the flower shop, the activity was slow after the intense previous week. Mary was in her usual place, with all her attention turned to the computer that she barely saw when I entered and jumped out of the chair when I asked where Claire was. I laughed because this rarely happened, she always listened to me arrive and I must say that sometimes it scared me because it seemed that she was waiting for me every day with her eyes stuck to the door. I grinned while she stuttered the answer to my question, saying that Claire was locked in her office since early morning.

Hum, that wasn't a good thing. She never stayed isolated in her office for long, she liked to have coffee and check all the bills and orders with Mary. I stood for a while in front of the door thinking if I would knock before to warn of my presence or would scare her entering at once. I thought about it and decided that my life was very important and I didn't want to lose my head if she had some dangerous object in her hand. I knocked twice and only heard a murmur, something like "enter", so I did what was said. When I came across the scene in front of me, I couldn't resist the teasing.

“Sassenach, researching ideas for our next time?” I tried to be serious, but I couldn't. She was totally focused on her book, one that I would never have imagined her reading based on her bookcase. "Fifty Shades of Grey" seemed to be being devoured by my friend who only turned her attention to me after the observation was made.

“Ah... I thought it was Mary... do you have any deliveries now?” she spoke trying to put the book in her desk drawer.

“I dinna have any deliveries, but ye ken I always come here.” I answered while I sat at the edge of the table, next to her.

“Mary lent me the book and I was curious, happy?” she said, crossing her arms and sulking.

“No need to explain yerself, Sassenach! Are ye enjoying the story?” I asked and turned to her. The smile could not leave my face.

“And if I say I like it? What would you do with this information?” she got up from her chair and stood between my legs.

For a minute I lost my line of thinking, which only came back when I heard Claire's laughter. But it didn't last long, I held her by the arm and shut her up with a kiss.

“Hey!” she screamed moving away from me. I questioned her with my eyes. “The door! You left it open!” I smiled and without wasting any more time, got up and made sure everything was locked.

When I returned to continue what I had stopped, Claire was already sitting on the table without her blouse and with a naughty smile on her face. The next few minutes were full of clothes flying around the room and hands everywhere, the desire stamped on both faces. At that moment I thanked that Claire's office was a little far from the entrance of the shop, because as much as the door was closed, my best friend was not the quietest person, as well as her work table that was being our only support.

“Sassenach...as much as I like yer wee noises, I dinna want Mary thinking I'm killing her friend.”

“I don't make noises...” she spoke with difficulty while I tried to silence her with my mouth.

A while later, still panting, we were getting dressed and trying to look serious, but the laughter was uncontrollable. We looked like teenagers doing something hidden from their parents, which was partly true. We decided that joining Mary would be the best way to disguise something, but the look we got from her only showed us that we were terrible at it. She looked us from top to bottom and raised her eyebrows discreetly. That's when I finally decided to look at both of us. Claire's hair was a little messy, as if she had run a few miles, her face was more flushed than normal and her lips were very red. Probably my hair was in a similar situation, but it was always like this, it would not be unusual and that's when I decided to look at my clothes, noting something I knew had caused the smile on Mary's face. My shirt was inside out. Fuck!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A fun chapter and merry Christmas to all! ❤❤❤

_**POV Claire** _

Mary was looking at me in a strange way, in fact she seemed to want to laugh, but was holding on. I was sure she hadn't heard us, my office was far away and the noise from the street made it impossible to hear anything beyond the counter where Mary was sitting now. I can admit that Jamie was right, I was a little noisy, but it was all Frank's fault! Yes, now I had found out that he was terrible at sex, or I hadn't done it for a long time, because I'd never made sounds like I did when I was with Jamie. Either way, I blame Frank, in both cases it was his problem.

When I sat down next to my friend, I saw my reflection in the mirror that was in the shop window and I held on to it so I wouldn't swear. Of course Mary was looking at me strangely, it seemed I had run 5 kilometers on the way from my office to there. My hair was like Medusa's, crazy curls everywhere and bulkier than on rainy days. Damn Jamie and his habit of running his hand through them. But it was not only that, my face was red as well as my lips and for a moment I breathed relieved for not having put on any makeup that morning, it would have been an even bigger accident.

I looked at Jamie in despair, looking for some excuse for Mary not to draw any hasty conclusion, I had to laugh when I thought that, what other conclusion would she draw? But she knew that we were friends and she would never think that we had just had some kind of hot sex in my office minutes ago. But my thoughts didn't get very far when I saw in my best friend's face the same despair that was on mine. And why was that? Because the bastard was wearing his shirt inside out! This lack of capacity cannot be possible! I had to put many more pieces of clothing than him and that human being could not wear a simple t-shirt properly?

“Mary, do you believe that the greenhouse irrigation system was a problem again? Of course I took advantage that Jamie came here even without deliveries to do and I put him to work, after all he is paid for something, right?” I knew that my laugh was forced, but it had been the fastest idea I had and Mary knew that this problem had happened before.

“Can ye see how I am exploited?” Jamie soon took control of the conversation when he noticed that I was lousy at lying. “And if it wasn't enough, I still wet myself trying to fix that old thing! If I get sick, ye ken I'll demand my rights, aye?” And he approached Mary with that smile on his face, almost touching her arm lightly.

And that's what it took for her to laugh and get all shy. Bastard, I hate how he can solve all problems with a single smile. After the relief took over my body, I saw that he said something to Mary that I could not hear and left. She was still smiling like a fool while turning her attention to the computer without saying anything to me. I thanked the silence and decided that the best thing was to go back to work, I would not push my luck again. Minutes later my cell phone vibrated with a message, it was from Jamie: "You owe me...will you keep reading the book? I can think of a thing or two for you to do in gratitude". And the phrase was followed by several naughty emojis. My answer was with only one picture, which involuntarily left me blushing. What was Jamie Fraser doing to me?

The next few days were calm, both at work and in the rest. Jamie and I decided it was better to keep sex out of the flower shop environment, I wasn't good at hiding things and his charm wouldn't last forever with Mary. Of course, sometimes my lunch hour was longer than usual or the workday was over early, but all this was E.L. James' fault and the books she wrote. But before you draw any conclusion, the book just made me, how can I say, more aroused? Despite Jamie's insistence, no, we didn't do anything that was described in the pages and we just stopped thinking about it after knowing that Mary had lent me the book to read. It was better not to imagine anything of my partner.

Friday had arrived and with it an invitation from my friend Geillis. She was a bit absent, probably because she knew she had gone too far the last time we went out together. But this time I didn't ignore her and immediately accepted the invitation to go to one of the most popular pubs in London. Of course she wanted me to go alone, because she was planning a date for me with Alec's best friend, and yes, she was still with him, which surprised me a bit. Apparently she was enjoying him and I decided that I would try to be nicer this time, I probably didn't leave a good impression when I met him. When I told her I would go with Jamie, she just answered with a positive sign and said nothing else. Did she finally understand that we were just friends and I didn't want to meet anyone at that moment?

“So we are already like this? I have my life, ye ken? Not everything revolves around ye!” Jamie said when I told him that we were going to the pub that night.

“Oh sure, you were ready to take me to your house to watch a movie later, I saw that you brought an extra helmet.” I answered by pointing to the item mentioned that was stored inside the counter of the shop.

“It could be for someone else!”

“Will you be here at eight?” I interrupted him before he prolonged that unnecessary conversation.

He answered me by rolling his eyes and taking his motorcycle key, leaving me laughing alone. Of course, before he left, he turned to me and made a gesture that I knew very well. I hated that he was as much a fan of "Friends" as I was and knew how to send me to that place in a way that nobody else understood. At least not Mary, who almost had a heart attack when she confessed that she had never watched this show and we screamed at her.

And of course at eight sharp he was already sending me several messages that he was waiting for me down there. Lazy as ever, he didn't like to climb the steep stairs that led to my apartment for minutes later coming down them again. We decided that we would go with his motorcycle and Jamie would be the designated driver of the night, something obvious since I had no idea how to ride a motorcycle. As I knew the means of transportation in advance, I prepared myself for such a situation. My hair was pinned, I wore my best jeans and a leather jacket. This last item had been a gift from Jamie, he claimed that if I was going to start riding with him on a motorcycle, I needed to be properly dressed and not with the old lady coats I wore. I didn't know whether to be flattered or offended.

“Someone decided to look nice today!” Jamie said as he measured me from top to bottom. “Geillis is taking someone for ye?”

“You know she isn't, that's why I'm taking you!”

“Ouch, I dinna ken if I'm offended or not!”

“Is the drama over? Can we go?” I asked while I was taking the helmet that was on the bike.

“This friendship is getting more and more abusive, if I couldna see ye naked, I dinna ken if I'd still be here...” 

And that's how I found out that Jamie really had a hard head like he always said. The helmet in my hand confirmed it.

_**POV Jamie** _

I was still complaining about the pain in my head when we entered the famous Pub that Geillis liked so much. It was crowded, but I had the advantage of being tall and being able to find people in crowds, and a redhead wasn't that hard. As soon as I saw Claire's friend, I pulled her by the arm and started to make way between people to get to the table that was close to a stage that probably would play some band that night.

Unlike the other time we went out together, this time Claire was excited and when she saw her friend, gave her a hug with a big smile on her face. I saw Alec sitting and waved to him, not very excited, I did not know how I would stand another night with him telling all the super interesting things he did and everything he could buy being part of an exclusive club in London. Seriously, Claire is in an eternal debt with me, I just hope the night is worth it later, because besides having to endure the boring conversation, I could not drink as much as I would like since I was riding a motorcycle. What sex doesn't make us do, right? Bullshit, Claire was my best friend, I would have done it anyway. I knew that if she had been listening to my thoughts now, she would have thrown the helmet on my head once more.

“I'm sure ye're having sex! Who's the lucky lad?” I heard Geillis' high-pitched voice and turned my attention to their conversation.

“Geillis!” Claire caught her friend's attention while a vermilion rose up her face. “The whole bar doesn't need to hear that! And you know that I'm single...”

“And since when does that stop ye from doing anything? And I know yer smile! It's Claire's happy smile, which I'll be honest to say I haven't seen in a while... who is the lad that is making my friend so happy? And ready for the attack.” she spoke looking at her friend from top to bottom.

I tried, I swear I tried to hold my laugh and get serious, but of course I couldn't. I started laughing, which only made Claire angrier and Geillis even more certain of what she was talking about.

“Jamie, be helpful and get us a drink! I want a shot of whisky, the best you can get! Ah, remembering that today it's you who pays!” she said looking at me seriously, but with a light ironic smile on her face.

“But ye dinna even like it...” I tried to argue, but she just dismissed me with her hands. Her friend laughed and they started talking again, not giving me a chance to say anything else.

I went to the bar and ordered our drinks. As I was the driver of the night, I asked for my only shot of whisky and for Claire I ended up choosing a weaker shot, diluting a little with water. I was sure she would not notice the difference and would thank me later, besides, I did not want my friend falling off the bike on the way home. But something told me that she would not stop at that shot of whisky. And I was right. I returned a few more times to the bar at her request, which in parts was good because I tried to make the shots weaker and she really did not notice.

The band finally started playing and I thanked them for not having to think about topics to talk to Alec anymore, since with the loud sound, one couldn't hear the other very well. And for my happiness, the band wasn't bad and I was really enjoying the songs. They played a little bit of everything, but at that moment they were in the classic rock songs of all times.

“I think we should go there and dance!” Geillis told Claire. “Besides, the singer doesn't stop looking here, I think he's got his eye on ye!”

Without me noticing, I made the same movement as Claire to confirm what Geillis was talking about and really was true. Some people had gotten up from the tables and were close to the stage supporting the band, most of them were women, of course, since the singer seemed to look at everyone who was begging for his attention. I could never understand this fetish for lead singers, drummers, guitar players or any man standing on a stage. What did the women see in them? And this singer wasn't even that handsome. Not that I thought any man was handsome, but he didn't have anything too attractive.

While I was stuck to my thoughts, I didn't even notice when Claire and Geillis got up and went near the stage. Alec caught my attention making some comments I couldn't understand because of the loud music, but at that time he could say anything that I wouldn't answer, I was busier seeing Claire totally loose and moving her body in the rhythm of the music. I always knew that my friend had a beautiful body, that she had curves that appeared even in her baggy clothes that she used to work. But it was never something that caught my attention, after all she was my friend and my eyes saw her differently. And that had changed? No! She was still my friend, but after seeing all those curves up close, feeling them in my fingers, well, the reaction she provoked in my body was totally different and now she was killing me while dancing unpretentiously. Or was she doing it on purpose? Either way it wasn't for me that she was showing off her best movements, but that didn't keep my pants from starting to bother me.

The Bon Jovi song "You Give Love a Bad Name" was still in the middle and I didn't know what to do. Why did Claire decide to go dancing? And with those pants? I didn't know she could be so...so, how can I say, so sexy dancing? The only time I had seen any movement in her body was when I caught her cleaning the house to the sound of Justin Timberlake. But I'm an idiot, of course I knew she was good at sexy moves, I had seen it in a different way and not dancing! Hmm, this memory was not helping me at all to keep my sanity. For my happiness, the music was finally over and I saw that while Geillis was returning to our table, Claire took the opposite direction which led to the bar restrooms.

Without thinking twice, I got up quickly, banging my knee on the table and almost knocking over all the glasses. But I ignored Geillis' questions who wanted to know what was wrong with me, probably because my face was not the best and I walked firmly to my destination. When I arrived at the narrow and dark corridor where the restrooms were, I thought I could only be crazy, but it was all those damn jeans' fault that embraced Claire's curves in a way I didn't expect. I saw that there were some couples taking advantage of the privacy of that place to do the same thing I had in mind. When I heard the noise of the door opening, I looked quickly and saw that it was her leaving.

“Jamie? Are you in line to go to the restroom?” she questioned me as I stood there.

“Sassenach, where did ye learn to dance like that?” I said the words before I realized what I was doing. She relaxed her features and opened a naughty smile.

“Why? Did you like it?” Aye, the whisky had had some effect on her. But I didn't care, much less with her approaching my body that was leaning against the wall.

I didn't answer her, I just pulled her abruptly, causing her body to get in friction with mine at once. She could feel the answer to her question right away and her smile only increased.

“Sassenach...” and that's what I managed to whisper in her ear before I pulled her hair with will, making her face me before I attacked her mouth with a desperate kiss.

She didn't dodge, on the contrary, she got even closer to my body, passing one of her hands in my hair and the other under my shirt. That was enough for me to invert our positions and press her against the wall in a quick motion that caused her to moan. Claire raised one leg and wrapped herself in me, pulling me closer than was possible in that place. I knew I had already lost any self-control and didn't care, but it seemed that this was not what she had in mind, because with a lot of effort she walked away from me, interrupting the bites I was giving her in the neck.

“I think we need to go back to the table, they're going to think I fainted in the toilet...”

“I dinna care what they think!” I said trying to get back to what I was doing, but she gently pushed me back.

“Someone is determined...but it's still early, we have the rest of the night ahead!” she spoke smiling and started to walk back to the table.

“That is the problem!” I murmured as I mentally cursed her for bouncing in front of me, I knew she was doing it on purpose.

When we arrived at the table, we sat down as if nothing had happened, but as soon as Geillis saw us, she opened a smile and a laugh took over her. Claire and I did not understand anything, what was wrong with us? Realizing our confusion, she got her cell phone and took a picture of us. She still laughed and shook her head while looking at the screen. Ok, were we clowns now? Claire got impatient and took the phone from her friend's hand to see what was so funny. Her face showed amazement and I saw it turned red quickly as she dropped the phone on the table. But what was so wrong with it? I went straight to that picture and couldn't do anything else but laugh. Claire had the red lipstick all smudged and the rest of it was on me, yeah, now it was too late to make up any excuse.


	9. Chapter 9

_**POV Claire** _

Jamie's laughter took over the table, along with Geillis who was having fun at our expense. I didn't know if my friend was laughing nervously or because he really didn't give a damn about the embarrassment we had experienced. But I decided to join them, now I had nothing else to do, what excuse would I make up? That Jamie was feeling sick and needed mouth-to-mouth? Or the other way around? After all, it would make more sense for me to be feeling unwell, but that doesn't even come to the point, the excuse would be terrible anyway and Geillis wasn't as understanding and discreet as Mary to accept any bullshit we would say to justify it.

I just thanked my friend for being a little drunk because of the several shots of whisky and not insisting on wanting details of what we were doing minutes earlier in the restroom hall. She was satisfied with giving some totally inappropriate sexual advice that we wouldn't follow, but which provoked more laughter at our table. Laughter that soon lost its fun for the next topic, in this case, a couple who were fighting in front of us and soon made up in a way, which, how can I say? Not appropriate for a public place.

I decided to relax and drink some more. I noticed that Jamie's hand was squeezing my leg under the table with every sip I took of my drink, I didn't know if it was to continue the provocations or to call my attention to the amount of alcohol I was ingesting, anyway, I ignored the two options and I continued animatedly my conversation with Geillis about the reason why the couple we were watching before had fought. I soon found out that Jamie was really calling my attention about the drink, because when he saw me hiccupping, a clear indication that I had already exceeded my acceptable limit, the hand that was squeezing my leg came accompanied by a frown.

“I think we should go, Sassenach, I dinna want ye to blame me later for falling off my bike while I was going home, even though I ken it's entirely yer fault since I didna drink anything all night!” Ok, he was not happy and even trying to make a joke, his weak smile showed how frustrated he was that I drank too much.

“Jamie, don't be dramatic, I'm fine! So is my balance! I would never fall off your bike, unless you dropped me on purpose!” And to demonstrate what I was saying, I got up from the chair quickly, which was a mistake after spending so much time sitting and drinking. I felt Jamie's strong hand squeezing me at the waist and holding me so I wouldn't fall in his lap.

“Come on Sassenach, I think ye already proved that yer balance is great!” he spoke with all the irony he possessed.

And he also didn't wait for my answer, pulling me by the arm without giving me much chance to say goodbye to my friend. When we arrived on his bike, I was almost knocked down by the helmet he threw in my hands, but what was happening? I had drunk like this before when we went to other pubs and I always became the reason for his jokes and provocations that I could not stand any alcohol. And I really thought we were having fun.

“Jamie!” I called him while I watched him put his helmet on. “Fraser!” I yelled when I saw that he ignored me. He looked at me and said nothing. “What's your problem? Your underwear turned inside out? I thought we were having fun!”

“My underwear is fine, thanks, and for now I only see ye having fun.” He answered with a half smile, soon returning to what he was doing.

I don't know what had left him like that, but it wouldn't spoil my night and I also didn't have the patience for him being fussy. I got on the bike and settled behind him. I would never admit it, but all the way I felt that the world was spinning around me, which made me hold onto Jamie's body so tight that I knew it would leave marks. When we reached our destination, in this case his house, I carefully got off the bike to make sure I still felt my legs.

“Sassenach! Are ye crazy woman?” Jamie yelled at me as he took off his helmet. “Ye almost knocked me off the bike! I knew ye were not well! Why didna ye tell me? We could have had an accident!” And while he was screaming, I could only pay attention to the vein on his forehead that seemed to be trying to jump off his face. “Sassenach? Are ye listening to anything I'm saying?”

“Have I told you that you are very dramatic today?” I spoke calmly while approaching him. “I only held on to you lightly and I only did it because you go too fast, I've said this before!” When I finished saying that, I thought I would be killed right there in that hall and I didn't waste time in using all my tricks to avoid that.

“Sassenach...” Jamie was serious when he felt me hugging him, just like my hands were starting to run through his body. “What are ye doing?”

“What do you think? Finishing what we started there in the pub...” and I knew I was able to calm him down because I soon felt his hands on my ass.

“Hmm...” I heard him whispering and I continued what I was doing. “Sassenach...Claire, yer ass is vibrating.” He spoke louder and finally took my attention away from what I was doing.

And it really was, it was my cell phone that miraculously survived all night in my pocket, by the way, I still didn't remember how I had put it there if I had taken a small shoulder purse. Who was calling me at that hour? When I looked at the display I got scared and tried my best to disguise my drunken voice when I answered.

“Dad?” I spoke a little apprehensively. I noticed that Jamie raised his eyebrows showing concern, I gesticulated with my hand that I didn't know and really had no idea the reason for the contact.

The conversation came down to an imposition disguised as an invitation to dinner at my parents' house the next day. Our relationship was not perfect, far from it, but once a month I made the sacrifice of going to have dinner with them so that we could see each other, even if all these visits resulted in a discussion about my bad decisions, of course that was their point of view. But I was still intrigued by my father's phone call time, by the way, he rarely did that. The invitations were sent by message or by Mary, since she saw more of my parents than I did.

“Sassenach? Is everything okay? Ye're scaring me.” Jamie asked me and got me out of my thoughts. Probably my face wasn't the best, thinking about my parents' dinners caused me a slight discomfort.

“Well, it depends on your point of view, after feeling embarrassed in front of my friend, almost falling off the bike and being interrupted at a somewhat inappropriate moment with a phone call from my father, yes, I'm fine...” and that's how I got a laugh from my best friend.

“What did yer father want? Besides interrupting something that was very interesting to me...”

“Make me go to his house for dinner tomorrow, but of course it was in the subtle form of a totally friendly invitation.” I answered with a frown.

“Do ye want me to go with ye?” he asked while dragging me up the stairs. At those moments I hated the fact that his building had no elevator.

“Are you serious? Would you make this huge sacrifice for me?” I still looked at him in surprise at how he might want to do it freely, spontaneously, willingly.

“Of course, I'm yer best friend, aye? And I doubt that a dinner at yer parents' house can be as bad as ye say.”

My laughter was the only answer I could give at that moment.

_**POV Jamie** _

After the hectic evening, Claire asked if we could just watch a movie and relax, the conversation with her father had left her a bit discouraged, actually not the conversation itself, but the idea of having to meet him the next day. Did I expect something else for the end of that night? Yes, but seeing the way my friend had gotten, it took away from me any desire to do anything other than comfort her, I knew how a bad relationship with someone in the family could affect us emotionally.

While she was changing clothes for something more comfortable, that was my old rugby t-shirt that she had already chosen as her official sleepover outfit, I chose one of the many romantic movies from her Netflix favorites list, and yes, we had lost all limits with this friendship. She had already mastered all my apps, had her own profile on Netflix, her playlists on my Spotify and her favorite wines on my fridge. What did I have in her house? Nothing, because I refused to spend too much time in that apartment made for people under 5ft.

The movie started and fifteen minutes later, Claire was already sleeping in my lap. I knew this would happen, not only because of the events at the end of the night, but because of all the whisky she had drunk. I watched her sleeping and it didn't even look like she was the same person who had made me angry hours before. I was still trying to understand why I had lost my mind like that, in fact I knew very well what had been the reason, Claire dancing in front of me with those tight jeans, then starting something that she promised to finish later and totally depriving me of drinking when everything had gone wrong. She had fun with what happened when we got back to the table, but I could not even drink whisky to forget. Besides, I knew that with all Claire was drinking, nothing else would happen at the end of the night, which would leave me with that discomfort I felt between my legs.

In the end, I had exaggerated my reaction, I like to have fun with my friend and it's not the sex between us that would change that. And at that moment she just needed her best friend to support her in visiting her parents the next day, and that I would do with great pleasure. But nothing was stopping her from thanking me for this favor in several ways that I imagined when I saw her dancing in those perfect jeans. I laughed with my thoughts and decided that it was time to go to bed, the movie didn't interest me and I was too tired to stand romantic movies. I took Claire in my arms, with a lot of sacrifice, how could she get so heavy sleeping? And I took her to my bed, passing out soon after.

The next day I was woken up with all the delicacy my hangover friend could have. “Sassenach...” I said it with my voice still hoarse and slightly irritated. “I've already said that ye just have to press the red button of the coffee maker.”

“I already did that Fraser! It's already time for our brunch and then I have to take a look at your closet, we need some decent clothes to go to my parents!” she was talking loud and fast, clearly the effect of liters of coffee already ingested.

“Do WE need it? As far as I ken yer clothes are in yer house.” I said it and closed my eyes again.

“Very funny, but as I said before, we are late for our brunch and we don't have time for you to sleep anymore!”

I tried to argue, but it was useless. She seemed to be high, pulling me out of bed, then dragging me to the bathroom, the only thing she didn't do was pee and brush my teeth for me. I decided it was easier for me to agree to everything and take her to eat soon, it would calm her down. I was wrong, I was even dizzy while trying to eat and drink my coffee, Claire kept giving me information about her parents, what they liked to talk, the interests they had for Scotland, how they never knew Frank very well, what they did not like to talk and several other things that I could not absorb.

Two hours later I managed to get rid of my dear friend. For that I had to agree with the clothes she had chosen for me to wear at night and promise more than once that I wouldn't change anything and that I would get her at seven sharp in front of the flower shop. Her parents enjoyed an early dinner and for all that she had explained to me, they had the ritual of serving drinks in the library before the meal was served. As Claire said, this was the most torturing half hour of her life, because it was when her parents pressured her for news about the business, even though they already knew everything from Mary, just to propose that she sell the business to one of several wealthy friends they knew who would make that flower shop something profitable and serious.

I knew I couldn't be the usual Jamie that night, at least not the Jamie Claire used to see every day. But what she didn't know was that I already knew how to deal with family members who liked to end all your self-esteem in seconds, after all one of my names is Mackenzie and they knew how to manipulate people like nobody else. I took a shower, put on the clothes that were set apart for me and went to the first destination of the night.

“Sassenach, I just received ten messages from ye! If ye dinna stop with these recommendations, I swear I'll leave ye here and go to yer parents' house alone!” I said when I saw her with her arms crossed waiting for me in front of the flower shop.

“As if they were going to let you in their house...at least you were a little presentable with the clothes I chose!” she answered while measuring me from top to bottom. I was wearing the clothes that were pretty much my uniform while I worked for my uncles, the only things that were not there were the jacket and the tie. I had been expressly forbidden to wear my leather jacket.

“Let's go! Yer parents live far away and I dinna wanna be late for my only shot of whisky tonight.” I said as I handed her my helmet.

Claire was wearing an outfit that made her more serious and older. She had on a pair of pants well aligned to her curves and a blouse that I had no idea if it had any name. I noticed that she was in heels because she was much taller than usual. I had to hold the laugh when I saw the two of us on that bike, we seemed totally lost in that environment, but I preferred to keep the comment to myself in order to not annoy Claire who already seemed very stressed.

The way to her parents' house was faster than I imagined and we were in front of the entrance door at exactly 7:15 PM. I smiled gladly that we were ahead of schedule, but the smile was not reciprocated by my friend. I took her hand and she was cold. I had never seen her like that, so nervous and not herself, but by the little she had told me about the conflicts with her parents, it was not strange her reaction to that dinner. I had to confess that when I saw Claire's parents' imposing house, butterflies in my stomach came up, but before I could have time to make a joke about it to relax, the door in front of us suddenly opened, causing me to get scared and let go of my friend's hand.

“Good evening Claire! I thought I heard a noise, I just didn't expect this.” Her father said in a deep voice with a strong English accent. He looked at me seriously, but the "this" he was referring to was not just me but the whole thing. My bike, my long hair and my hand that had just parted from his daughter’s.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year to everyone! Stay safe and let's hope for better days in 2021!

_**POV Claire** _

I knew what my father was thinking as soon as he looked Jamie up and down, I hadn't said that I would take someone with me and even less a man. Frank had gone to only one of those monthly dinners that he was practically forced to attend at my parents house and it was not one of the best nights, at least not for me. Frank's eyes shone as soon as he saw the imposing Victorian-style house and the vast library where we had drinks before the food was served, a ritual my parents had always done. Me dating a history teacher wasn't something my dad longed for in his dream of a perfect son-in-law, but now I was sure he thought better than a longhaired, redheaded biker. What he didn't know was that Jamie was there just as a good friend and nothing else.

We entered the house without many words being exchanged between Jamie and my father, he just asked my friend's name and showed a certain astonishment when listening to the Scottish accent among the many surnames that Jamie pronounced as if it was poetry. My mother was already sitting in her usual armchair in the library and got up excited when she saw me come in, but her smile soon faded when she saw the tall redhead behind me. At that moment I was just trying to think about how to reward my friend from that disastrous night, I think he never received so many looks judging him that way and I knew how good the Beauchamps were in offending someone with only their eyes and a light smile that contained more words than we could imagine.

“Claire, Mary told me how the Valentine's Day sales went. Who would have thought that they would look so much for your little shop on this very important date and I don't think you expected this either, because she told me about the problem you had with the deliveries...” My father spoke and looked at Jamie for a second while he was preparing two glasses of Martini, one for me and another for my mother. These were the traditional drinks of the Beauchamp family women, one that I never liked much, but I never dared to change. “But it seems that a miraculous delivery boy appeared who saved you from the damage with the customers.”

And with a slightly sarcastic smile, he gave me the drink. I was already with the answer on the tip of my tongue when I was interrupted by my father who seemed not to want to let me talk much that night. My mother just watched everything with a look I knew very well, the same look that I felt weight on my body when I told her that I had left medical school.

“James, can I offer a shot of my best whisky? It is not a Scotch, but I think it has the same quality after all the Irish started producing first.” And there was the provocation that Henry Beauchamp loved so much to do.

“They may have been the first to produce officially, but our people already ken what is a good whisky well before the 18th century, we just didna want to share it with the rest of the world until everyone knew how to appreciate it correctly. But I promise not to compare it with what we produce in my family's company.” Jamie answered with a light smile and I almost choked on my drink. What did he mean his family produced whisky? “Relax Sassenach, ye dinna have to drink yer Martini so fast, we still have a lot to talk about until dinner, aye?”

“Does your family produce whisky?” I asked, totally ignoring what he had said to me.

“Yes, my sister and my brother-in-law own a small distillery in Lallybroch, my family's property, the same one my uncles wanted to buy while I was working with them, that's why I went to work with ye”. He tried to wink, I was still stunned, how could I not know these details of my best friend's life? The same one who knew everything about my business and who had already seen me naked. And what did I know about him? That he was Scottish, that he had a crazy ex-girlfriend, an expensive motorcycle and a wonderful body. Yes, I was the most selfish person in the world. But he seemed to ignore my look of amazement and kept talking. “I couldna continue working with people who said they were good and wanted my welfare while they used my knowledge to buy the property that my father built with his own hands.”

My parents looked at both of us and seemed to want to understand what relationship we had if I knew nothing about "James's" family, but I knew they wouldn't stay silent for long.

“Sassenach? Isn't that the name of your shop? And you let him call you that?” My father spoke a little outraged, he, like Frank, always hated the name I had chosen for my business. They could not understand the true meaning, they thought I was doing an offense to myself and to my people, in this case the English.

“I'm sorry Mr. Beauchamp if this seemed an offense, but to me it's just an affectionate nickname and yer daughter attributed a beautiful meaning to the name of the flower shop after all we all already felt like a foreigner in our own country or even in our own lives.”

That night was surprising me more and more, how could Jamie face all my father's questions that way? And he didn't even seem to be sweating like me at that moment. In fact, besides being dry, a smile remained on his face and was not like my father's ironic smile, it was one of satisfaction. Jamie Fraser just kept surprising me and I promised myself that I would question more about my best friend's life, I needed to learn more about him and not just about his body.

“My daughter doesn't really seem to care about this nickname, but I've warned before that this name affects her business, I have friends who work in advertising and could find something more appropriate for a small flower shop.” Her last words seemed dragged, my parents always referred to my business as a store, they couldn't see their only daughter owning a flower shop, they thought this was a service for a gardener without the gifts to save lives.

“As incredible as it seems, this name calls attention among others more common in the field. I was helping Mary the other day with the flower shop's social networks and the engagement with the name was very high and we ended up developing a slogan for the shop. Despite having graduated in administration, I always worked together with the marketing department of my uncles' company and the Mackenzies know how to promote a business, I ended up learning a lot.”

I saw my mother's eyes widen a little in mention of Jamie's uncles surname. Did she know them? My father seemed a little convinced by my friend's knowledge and they both engaged in a conversation about advertising, something that I had no interest in, much less at that moment. I got up to get more alcohol, I still couldn't believe how well Jamie was dealing with my parents, in fact he was much better than me!

“When were you going to tell us that you weren't dating Frank anymore?” My mother asked me sneaking up on my side.

“Jesus Roosevelt Christ!” I had almost knocked over my glass. “I didn't think you were interested in my love life...and I also knew that Mary would let it slip away, so I preferred to save a phone call.” I knew I was being rude, but I never liked talking about this part of my life to my parents because they always judged my boyfriends, not that they were always wrong. I preferred to find this out on my own, it was enough to be the daughter they weren't proud of for her professional choice, I didn't need to be disapproved of in my love choices either.

“And did you also prefer Mary to tell us about your new boyfriend?” and at that same time the liquid I was drinking ended up in my mother's blouse. “Claire!” she shouted indignantly as she saw that I had spat the martini on her clothes. This caught the attention of my father and Jamie who looked at us both without understanding anything.

“He's my best friend and that's all!” I said determined to bring that matter to a close.

“I'll ask for dinner to be served, I think Claire has already drunk too much on an empty stomach.” My mother said as she left the library walking harshly.

My father looked at me angry, I shrugged and Jamie just held the laughter to not make it worse, but I knew he was having fun at my expense. The silence prevailed until my mother came back to let us know that we could go to the dining room that the food was already ready and would be served in a moment. As we walked down the hall, Jamie gently pulled me by the hand and whispered in my ear.

“Relax Sassenach, I won't let yer father ruin your evening!” And with a wink of an owl and a playful smile on his face, he continued walking as if that was the best night of his life.

I couldn't hide my smile, he was a real joker and mine... my best friend. We sat at the table as we always did, my father on one end and my mother on the other. I sat on the side with Jamie in front of me and couldn't help but smile when I saw his serious expression as he watched the whole formality of that table set. At the beginning of dinner, we were silent, just enjoying the wonderful food that Mrs. Graham knew how to make. She had been working for my parents since we moved back to London and that was the only thing I missed about living there.

But as the dishes went on, my father got back to the subject of my business and that's when things got out of hand. He started slowly, wanting to see if Jamie would agree with him and help him convince me, but my best friend knew me, knew about my dreams and everything I had gone through to make them come true.

“Claire, you need to stop fooling around, you're not a teenager anymore to be in the rebellious phase. Your mother and I tried to see your giving up medical school as an act of rebellion since you never had time for it before, you were always so mature for your age. But this madness of opening a flower shop and playing at being a gardener is only leading you to debts and more debts...”

“Fooling around? Rebelliousness? One thing you are right, yes, I was always mature for my age because I was forced to, I always moved from one city to another without being able to make lasting friendships, without spending much time with my parents, but you never tried to understand me, never stopped to ask if medical school was what I dreamed for my life. It wasn't and now I'm finally living the life I always dreamed of!”

“Living in a tiny apartment and having a business doomed to failure?” My father increased his tone of voice in the same way I had done before.

“It is not doomed to failure! You never went there to see what my shop is like, you never were interested in seeing how I work...”

“Mary made it very clear that the bills are not closing at the end of the month. If you stopped being so stubborn, you would accept my investor's offer and you could go back to college, your _"Sassenach"_ would be well taken care of and you could be someone...” but I wouldn't let him finish the sentence, listening to him pronounce the name of my flower shop in that rude way and loaded with an accent that wasn't even close to the way Jamie spoke every time he called me made my world collapse, my eyes fill with tears and my body tremble.

“I'm not going to sell my business to a damn investor, let alone go back to college! And next time you want to know about my business bills, ask me directly!” I spat the words as I got up from the table, my legs were shaky, but soon I was backed up by a pair of strong hands and a voice that calmed me down for a second.

“Sassenach, let's get out of here.” And with that Scottish melodic accent, I was taken out of my parents' house, but not without seeing Jamie look at my parents with disapproval.

_**POV Jamie** _

When I exchanged my first words with Claire's father I already knew that the night would not be easy, but I never expected it to end that way. My best friend had already told me about her parents' disappointment that she left medical school to open her own business and I can even understand why they felt that way, after all Claire was an only child, her father was a doctor and surely dreamed of the same future for his heiress. But they should understand when a child was not made for that destiny they dreamed of, that they longed for, my parents always wanted above all our happiness even if it was doing something they didn't understand or dreamed of for us. The look I saw in Henry Beauchamp as he uttered the mean words to Claire was much more than disappointment, it was something I never wanted to see in my father's eyes and it made my legs move in the automatic as far as my friend was sitting, helping her to get out of that place quickly.

But before we left the big dining room, I couldn't avoid looking disapprovingly at Claire's parents. I couldn't believe her mother's lack of reaction to everything her father had said, but she only lowered her head when I faced her seconds before taking my friend out of that house. I could feel Claire's body shaking while walking holding her to where my bike was parked, I wanted more than anything to get out of that place, but I didn't know if she was able to sit without my support.

“Sassenach...” I whispered in her ear as I ran my hands through her arms, as if warmth was the solution to her shivering. “If ye want I can call a cab and tomorrow I'll come back for the bike...”

“No, I'm fine.” She interrupted me speaking louder, as if she wanted to say that to her too. “And I don't think it's a good idea to leave your bike here until tomorrow, maybe your _daughter_ will be "kidnapped". and a small smile came out on her lips as she wiped an insistent tear from her face.

“It's true, I dinna think I'm yer parents' favorite person right now...”

“Not just you! But let's go? I think we've been here too long.” And without waiting for an answer from me, she started trying to get the helmet that was attached to the bike.

“Sassenach, are ye sure ye're okay to ride the bike? I dinna wanna lose ye on the way.” I tried to make her laugh and put an end to that sad mood.

“You asked exactly this same question that day in the bar and you didn't lose me, if it didn't happen to me drunk, it won't be today that you get rid of me!”

“Oh, so ye assume ye were really drunk?”

“Of course! And you don't even want to say that you didn't know because you knew the risks you were taking!”

I just laughed and finally helped her with the helmet that she wasn't getting on. We got on the bike and I knew that night I could not leave Claire alone, much less with the words of her father in her mind, I needed to do something to make her feel better and that's when I had the idea. I felt her hands pressing me in question, she knew that we were not going to her house or mine, that was not the way we always did. Minutes later we stopped at our destination and when we got off the bike, her questions came quickly.

“Hyde Park? Did you feel like doing exercises now? Really?” she didn't seem very excited about the place that I had chosen. “Jamie?”

“We're not going to do exercises, but I want to show ye something!” And without giving her a chance to ask me any more questions, I pulled her by the hand.

Of course she wasn't silent during the walk of a few minutes to where I wanted to take her, but I ignored her eminent bad mood until we reached the stables in the park.

“Did you bring me to ride a horse?” she asked with a look of amazement that I could not understand if it was good or bad. “But it is closed.” Aye, she seemed disappointed.

“It is! But it won't be a problem!” And I showed her a key.

“Jamie! How do you have it? We're not doing something illegal, right? Because tonight was too much for me, I don't need to be arrested to complete my father's deceptions!”

“No Sassenach, it's not illegal at all, I have a cousin who works here and leaves a key with me, he knows how I like to come here once in a while to think...” I didn't finish saying what I wanted and she looked at me with a shy smile, as if she understood the words I hid from her.

“I can't even remember the last time I rode... I think it was when we visited my uncle Lamb in one of his many working sites, he is an archeologist and is always traveling around the world.” I could see the brightness in her eyes when talking about her uncle, it was probably someone very dear to her.

We entered the stables where they kept the horses used for rides in the park, as well as for the riding lessons they gave there too. I already knew some of them and I felt comfortable to care for them. While I left them familiar with me again, I whispered words in Gaelic that I had learned as a child with my father, words that did not have much meaning, but that brought a lot of calm to those animals that spent most of the night alone. Of course there was always an employee who was on duty in case something happened, but he didn't usually stay where we were.

When I looked back, I saw that Claire looked at me differently, with admiration maybe? But I just smiled at her who gave me back the same smile. I pointed to a bench next to the aisles to sit down and when we were comfortable, I decided it was time to explain why I had brought her there.

“I like to come here when I need some time alone, even if it's just to relax or to think about everything that's going wrong in my life...” I tried to laugh, but I felt Claire's hand squeeze mine. “Here it reminds me of home, Lallybroch...the house my father built and that I lived through all my childhood and teenage years. Since I was a little boy I always liked to spend the whole day in the stables with my father, they joked that I knew how to talk better with the horses than with people, but for me they were always my calmness, they listened to me when I talked about my problems, even if these were silly things like not having dessert after dinner for having fought again with my sister. When I came to London it was to run away from the memories of my father that were everywhere in Lallybroch...losing my mother as a child had been difficult, but losing my father as an adult seemed to hurt more because I could not run from my responsibilities, from the business he had started and that he expected me and my sister to continue. But I couldn't. Looking at the distillery every day and not seeing my father taking care of everything was very painful, so when my uncles showed up one day there offering me a position at their branch here, I didna think twice. If I had known that they only wanted me away so they could little by little buy the part of the company that was mine by right, I would never have done what I did. But at least I managed to find out everything in time and with the help of my family's lawyer, we protected ourselves and the following week I resigned. Of course I made a point of talking everything I thought about them, which made me not get a job at any company with which they had contact.”

“Is that why you showed up at the flower shop?” she asked with a sad look and I didn't know if I had done well in telling all that.

“Aye, my savings were running out, I couldna get a job anywhere and my sister was making my life a living hell, believing that I was irresponsible for not selling my bike and quitting a steady job.”

“But did she want you to continue working with your uncles even after what they did?”

“I never told her what they tried to do with Lallybroch, I didna want her to worry about it while she was pregnant, and the business there already brings enough headache. Besides the distillery, which was my father's wildest dream, the estate produces wool and dairy products for most of Scotland.”

“Jamie...” and the same look I had seen before was there again, the look I couldn't tell what it meant. “I found out today that I am a terrible friend! Until you told my father about the distillery, I had no idea about your family or your profession before you went to work with me! How could I have been so selfish? I told you about all my problems and never listened to yours!” She talked non-stop and squeezed my hand tight.

“Sassenach, ye are not selfish! And I also never stopped to say something serious to ye, I didna want to burden ye with my life's boring problems...but today I brought ye here because I wanted ye to feel better in the place that helps me when I think nothing in my life is working out...and for ye to ken that we all have family problems and that ye are not alone.”

I saw her eyes filled with tears and I pulled her close to me, I knew we didn't need to talk anymore that night. She knew that I was there for what she needed and that she could always count on me. We ended up spending a few more hours there, with a few laughs as I tried to teach some Gaelic and with me sharing my love for those animals that brought me the good memories of my dear Scotland and the peace that Claire now evoked in me. 


	11. Chapter 11

_**POV Claire** _

I never thought dinner at my parents' house would be that way. Of course I expected the usual comments, but not in that intensity. My father always tried to convince me of the wrong things I was doing in my business, even though he had never seen the flower shop personally, but he had never spoken that way, with harsh words that hurt me more than ever. It may be that Jamie's presence increased the reasons for him to think that I had ruined my life or he thought that with my friend there he would convince me more easily.

Either way, what surprised me the most was not the attitude of my parents, even though they hurt me, but what Jamie did for me. I never had someone who cared so much about my well-being, who gave me so much strength in everything I did, in short, a friend who was present at all times, both good and bad. And I was surprised to know more about his life, which was nothing simple until now, but still did not take that smile off his face that I liked so much. After we left the stables, we went straight to his house where we collapsed in bed, with no energy for anything else but to change clothes to sleep. It had been an intense and exhausting night for both of us.

But the next morning I woke up renewed and full of energy, so much so that I didn't even wait for him. I immediately took a cab to my house because I was determined to have an important conversation with Mary. I went up to my apartment without meeting her at the flower shop, I needed to change my clothes after all I wouldn't have this conversation wearing the same clothes as the day before, she would never believe a word I had to say. I put on a comfortable dress, something I rarely wore to work, but that day was atypically hot for London and I was not ready to be sweating like crazy in that greenhouse.

When I went down to the shop, Mary was already sitting there focused on her tasks and no sign of Jamie there, great, that was the time for our conversation! I grabbed a cup of coffee and sat next to her on the counter, drawing her attention by coughing lightly.

“Wow! I didn't even hear you come down! I think you're learning to be quieter with Jamie.” Mary spoke with a shy smile.

“Why? Am I noisy?” she just widened her eyes in response. “Forget it, that's not what I wanted to ask you. Mary, when was the last time you met my parents?”

“Me? Uh...” and there was Mary stuttering to answer, she always looked like that when I pressed her. “Actually, it was your father who called, and I...”

“Mary, you know you don't owe them anything, don't you?” She lowered her head without being able to face me “and I've already warned him, the next time he wants to know something here from the flower shop, it's to talk to me and not to you, but in case he still insists on the interrogation, just ask him to come and talk to me, ok?” I asked while I lifted her face to look her in the eyes. She just nodded her head in agreement. “Oh, another thing, my love life isn't something you have to share with my mother either, not that I have anything now, Jamie is just my friend, we're very friendly, but that's all! I know that sometimes we seem very intimate, but it's only because we get along very well and not because we have something...” And when I realized, I was talking non-stop and Mary was with a silly smile on her face.

I looked back and saw that Jamie was standing with arms crossed looking at Mary with a satisfied smile on his face, almost on the edge of a laugh. Bloody Scot who manages to get unnoticed in places!

“Well, I think you understood what I meant, didn't you Mary?” I asked her trying to ignore the laughter exchanged between her and Jamie. “Mary?”

“I understood, I understood Claire...” she was still stuttering a little, but now I didn't know if it was nervousness or if it was because she was holding back the laughter caused by my best friend's presence.

“Jamie! What's the problem? Was I saying something funny by any chance?” I turned to him already with an angry face.

“No, not at all, but yer lively way of explaining things always leaves me with a smile on my face!” and he winked like an owl. Fool. “And since ye're so excited this morning, what do ye say we finally fix that leak in yer bathroom? Let's take advantage of the lack of deliveries...”

“What leak? The last time I went to my bathroom...” but he wouldn't let me finish the sentence and pulled me by the arm.

“Sassenach, ye dinna have to hide from Mary that yer apartment is horrible, she already kens that.” And without even letting me talk anymore, he pulled me up the stairs.

When we were already inside my apartment, I let go of his arm and looked at him angry, he had hurt me and I was not understanding anything.

“Can I know what we are doing here? Because we know very well that there is no leak in my bathroom!”

“Really Sassenach? Do I really need to answer this question? Ye provoked me all weekend, starting something ye couldna finish, now I want ye to fulfill yer part of the favor, after all I took ye out with yer friend and went to dinner at yer parents' house, two things I didn't get anything in return!” He spoke while approaching me with a look that I already knew very well.

“Ahh so that's it...” ok, I really don't know how I hadn't thought of that before.

“Aye, that's really what ye're thinking...and I can only thank ye for wearing this dress, less risk of showing up with some piece inside out later and it makes it a lot easier for me.”

And in a quick movement he opened my dress, making the buttons fly through the living room floor.

“Jamie!!!! It was my favorite dress! And you're the one who dresses things inside out!”

“I'm glad it was yer favorite, I couldna stand to see ye working with it and not be able to do anything...”

And those were the last words he said before pulling me close to his body, causing my legs to automatically go around his waist. While kissing my neck, he took us to my bed, which was nothing far from where we were. He laid me on the bed and as he stared at me with his eyes in a shade of blue that I had seen a few times, he undressed quickly. I was beginning to take off my panties to make things easier, but his hand stopped me quickly. He smiled naughtily at me while continuing what I had started, but not with his hands but with his teeth.

I couldn't stop looking at Jamie, I knew what he was about to do and an anxiety took over my body. How could I look like a teenager near him? It wasn't our first time, but I'd never seen him with such desire in his eyes. Soon his mouth was kissing and biting the inside of my thigh and I held my breath for a minute, and only managed to let go when I felt his tongue doing what I wanted most. Of course, the noises he affirmed so much that I made came together with his incessant movements between my legs.

Minutes later I was still in ecstasy when I felt him pass through my body to reach the drawer of my bedside table. I knew what he was looking for and when I looked at him, he stared at me with the giant box of condoms in his hands.

“Will we be able to finish this soon?” he said arching an eyebrow and staring at my body with a naughty look.

I faced him in the same way, paying attention to every detail of his body that was on me and I couldn't help but blush a little, I had never seen a body like Jamie's, he had really ruined everything for any man I might know in the future, but at that moment I could only think of one answer to his question.

“Is that a challenge?” I asked as I pulled him by the waist, almost with my hand on his ass. “Because if it is, I accept!”

The smile I saw on his face did not make me doubt that he would fulfill very well what he had asked.

_**POV Jamie** _

I woke up totally lost, how long had I slept? The night before had been so intense that when we got home, I couldn't think of anything but passing out in my bed. I was really tired because I managed to ignore Claire's body rubbing against mine as soon as we went to bed...speaking of her, why was I alone in the bedroom? Where had my friend gone? I stretched my arm to get my cell phone from the bedside table and with a little difficulty with the brightness of the screen, I saw that there was nothing. I have the worst friend in the world! I'm glad I know she's not crazy enough to wander around and probably went home.

I took my time to take a shower and a coffee, but while looking at my shirt that Claire used to sleep thrown on my couch, I could only think about how our friendship had changed after everything that happened last night. And not that it changed for the worse, far from it, I think we consolidated what we already knew was strong between us. I confessed things to her that I had never told anyone, what had brought me to London, what my uncles had done for my family and how I felt about all this. I was not one to share my feelings much, but it seemed that with Claire it was a natural thing to do, I knew that she would not judge me like my sister always does and I think it is something mutual, because after everything I witnessed in her parents' house, I knew that she trusted me with her feelings too.

I took my key and went to the flower shop, even though I didn't have any deliveries to make, I couldn't stay home with nothing to do. When I got there, I saw that Claire was standing on the counter with her back to the door and gesticulated a lot to Mary who seemed to be holding a light smile on her face. I approached without being noticed, except for Mary who could see me and began to listen to the intense speech of my best friend. She was nervous and I knew because of the speed in her speech, but after noticing that she was wearing a dress, I stopped paying any attention to her words that wanted to convince Mary that we were just friends and nothing else.

Why was she wearing that dress at work time? I had never seen her like that and I can say that it was not easy to face those long legs exposed, even more knowing everything they could do around my body. The dress could also accentuate another part of her body that I really liked to admire. Okay. I really needed sex, and it had to be soon. I turned my attention to their conversation in an attempt to distract myself from totally impure and inappropriate thoughts for that moment.

I could not avoid the smile when I saw Claire totally messed up in her words and Mary totally unaware of what she was talking about while facing me with a silly smile on her face. Of course Claire soon realized my presence there and was not at all pleased with me there laughing at her. Before she could extend the matter even further with Mary, I tried to think of any excuse to take her to her apartment. I needed to solve my problem and soon.

Half an hour later I was with those long legs that I admired earlier wrapped around my waist and pulling me into more of that sex that made me so crazy. I don't know what had happened that morning, but Claire was staring at me in a way that made me want to fulfill the challenge she had made. What I didn't count on was Claire's cell phone ringing insistently while, well, we were very busy, especially her.

“Sassenach...” I grumbled when she abruptly left me to answer the phone. “Did ye really need to do that?”

She just mumbled something like an apology and took the call. It was Mary, who was desperate because of a supplier who insisted that he had delivered the products to the shop, when in fact none of the products ordered had ever arrived. Claire tried to calm down her partner while she desperately looked for her panties. I gave it to her after I found thrown on the floor next to my clothes that I started to dress a little disappointed.

“Seriously Jamie, did you have to do that?” She said angrily while looking at her dress without some buttons “How will I explain to Mary that I got upstairs with one outfit and down with another? By any chance was it the leak in my bathroom that caused this?”

“Of course, after all, that's what happened!” I smiled in a wicked way. “Sassenach, do ye really think Mary believed in all yer speech that we are just friends and nothing else?”

“Yeah, isn't that what we are? Why wouldn't she believe it?”

“We may be just friends, but that's not all. Do ye really think she's so innocent in thinking that every time we disappear from the shop it's to fix something? Ye may be in financial trouble, but it's not that bad...” and I just laughed when I saw Claire's face change in front of me when she realized that her partner probably knew very well what we were doing.

She didn't say anything else and went in search of an outfit to wear, one that didn't involve legs showing. I went down before to help Mary with that supplier and I could only see a shy smile on her face when she saw me disheveled. Christ! We both really sucked at hiding things. At least Claire appeared minutes later more groomed than she was before, someone was making an effort not to raise too many questions.

The next few days ended with no major accidents, because now Claire had given up wearing a dress to work and I kept on waiting until the end of the day to try to finish with that damn condom box. We were already almost on the weekend and something unprecedented had happened. I was alone at home while my best friend was working on a secret project in her greenhouse, something that I was expressly forbidden to get near.

I was watching some game on TV when my phone rang. It was Jenny making a call through Face Time. I took a deep breath; I knew I couldn't run away anymore and I would have to face her after almost a month without giving much news. When I answered, I was relieved to see that she was not alone, Ian, my youngest nephew, was next to her with a giant smile on his face. I couldn't help smiling too, that boy was a character and even though he was still so young, he was smarter than his older brothers.

“Ouch, what miracle was that answering my call, brother?” Jenny being Jenny. She knew she could provoke me now and I wouldn't get mad in front of my nephew.

“Ye ken I'm busy, I always answer yer thousand messages.” I answered ironically.

“Oh aye! Ye're busy being a flower delivery boy! Our father would kill ye if he knew that all the money he spent on yer college was for his son to throw away his diploma while pretending to work with that motorcycle...” but I didn't let her finish.

“But he's not here right now and ye're not in a position to judge anything...” I took a deep breath watching Ian get serious about the two of us fighting. “Jenny, did ye really call me to tell me everything I'm doing wrong in my life?”

“Oh, so you assume ye're doing everything wrong?”

“No, that's what ye think! But what about ye Ian? Have ye managed to ride yer horse alone?” I tried to change the subject and it worked, my nephew started telling everything about his attempts to tame his little big pony. He was only five years old, but he had taken after his uncle's long legs.

“This weekend we are going to celebrate Ian's birthday and he wants very much that his uncle is present, doesn't he?” she spoke turning to her son who nodded with his head animatedly.

I knew I couldn't say no to my nephew. Since he was born, he has always been attached to me and even living far away, every time I visit Lallybroch, I have a shadow that follows me everywhere.

“I'm waiting for the gratitude for the money I sent ... beyond that amount, I'll send more for ye to buy the tickets to come here!”

“Jenny, I told ye I dinna need any money and I dinna want ye throwing it in my face, like now that you helped me with something.”

“Dinna be silly brother, the money I sent ye is yer share in the profits of the company, ye ken that father put yer name there along with mine. So, I'm not doing any charity!”

“It's okay...” I agreed not to bring any more discussion. “I think I'll get there on Friday then, so I can spend more time with my nephews and nieces...and especially with the birthday boy, aye?”

“Friday? Is this far, Mom?” Ian asked my sister.

“No son, just count on yer fingers, it's two days till yer Uncle Jamie gets here.” I smiled when he showed his fingers to me.

We said goodbye and I started looking for plane tickets, but that's when I had a brilliant idea! I wouldn't face Jenny alone and I had someone who owed me such a big favor. I smiled when I made another decision, we would not go by plane, no, my Sassenach will know everything from the Highlands on a motorcycle road trip that would be perfect!


	12. Chapter 12

_**POV Claire** _

As much as I enjoyed Jamie's company practically every day at the shop, and I'm not just talking about the benefits of our friendship, I needed some time alone for my project. My best friend was a distraction when I needed to focus on something I had never done before and so I demanded that he stay home at least until the weekend. The activity in the shop was slow and if he needed to make any delivery, we would call him.

And what was this so special project? Something I had no idea where to start! While I was still in college, I took advantage of some classes I could attend to deepen my little knowledge in botany and plant genetics. This together with the use of technology to do research was making me venture into a field that I didn't know if I would be able to get positive results. But I was not in a hurry, nor with high expectations, I just wanted to see what I was capable of doing with those wonderful flowers in front of me. Ok, I didn't explain anything of what I was doing!

I wanted to create a new kind of flower, something unique and different from everything we had in the UK. But of course, I wasn't alone in this madness, a colleague who worked in a genetics laboratory was helping me with equipment and things that were of my intellectual reach. Until now, the progress had been very small, but it was something that I was enjoying doing and it made me feel useful to this community so closed that it was botany.

I was distracted reading more about it in my small office when the door was opened violently and abruptly. I jumped out of the chair while cursing who had done such a thing, I hated being scared like that and could already imagine who it was. Mary would never have the strength for such violence against my dear door and even less reason to do that.

“Jamie Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser!” I screamed as I saw him standing in front of me with a determined look that brought me apprehension as I imagined what he planned to do there.

“I am so happy to see that ye can say my full name without hesitating Sassenach! But we dinna have time for that...” he smiled naughtily as he looked at me from top to bottom. “I need to ken if ye can carry a lot of weight, I ken yoga has left ye with a good posture, but taking a lot of care of the flowers in that greenhouse has left ye a little hunchback...” and talking quickly pulled me from the chair and started to put a giant backpack on my back that I had no idea of where it had appeared.

“Jamie!” I screamed as I felt like a rag doll in his hands. “Would you stop doing that and explain to me what the hell is going on? And I'm not a hunchback!”

“Sassenach, we dinna have much time for explanations, come on, we need to go upstairs so ye can start packing. I'm sure it won't take long, ye dinna seem to be the kind of woman who takes a lot of things when ye travel” And still ignoring my questions, he pulled me by the arm, dragging me out of my office and up the stairs.

“Traveling? Who says I will travel? I have to work! It's still the middle of the week and I can't...”

“Sassenach, ye own yer business, of course ye can! And Mary already said that she can be alone opening the shop. And as she said, it's the end of the month and ye deserve a rest!”

“Oh, so now you besides deciding things for me, you still talk to my partner asking for favors about my business? And you discuss my need for rest?”

“Aye!” I looked at him angry and he laughed “See how good it is to be on the other side? Ye did this to me several times and I never complained, now it's time to return the favor!”

“Of course, you never complained about anything I asked you to do...”

“Ye demanded, ye didna ask.” We were already at the door of my apartment and he didn't waste any time in opening it pushing me inside.

“Ok, name it any way you want, but you could refuse at any time!”

“Uhum, sure. But then I wouldna have anything to throw in yer face at moments like this!” And with a satisfied smile, threw the backpack that was on my back on my bed and sat on the side. “Now that we have reached an agreement, start sorting your clothes. Even though it's springtime, in Scotland it always gets a bit chilly at night and I ken ye're cold, even though ye were born in London!”

“Scotland? Are we going to Scotland?” Why was I already included myself in this trip? Of course I wouldn't go with him, I couldn't leave everything in Mary's hands. That would be wrong.

“Aye! Ye will meet Lallybroch! And my sister too, sorry Sassenach, she's part of the weekend package, but think of it as an exchange after I met yer parents!” and he smiled a half-hearted smile.

“Jamie, I can't spend the whole weekend away, you know we open the shop on Saturday and Mary can't prepare the arrangements if she needs to...” I was making a mental list in my head of how many arrangements I'd left ready while not realizing it, I was sorting out some clothes.

“Mary kens more things than ye can imagine! And I ken ye're already thinking about how many arrangements ye have ready.” I looked at him with amazement, uh, how much I hated how well he knew me.

“Ok, if I really decide to go with you to Lallybroch this weekend, why do I have to pack my things today and in such a hurry?”

“Because we're leaving early tomorrow! We'll sleep at my place and leave everything packed tonight, so I dinna have to put up with your bad mood when we wake up and the caffeine hasn't had any effect on yer body!”

“Do you want to go tomorrow? Thursday? If we take the first train we'll get there well before the weekend Jamie!”

“And who says we'll take the train?”

“That huge backpack that would never fit in the plane compartment?” I asked confused when I saw the almost laughter on his face.

“Sassenach, I may not want to spend much, but I would always pay for the luggage on the plane...but we're not going by train or by plane...”

“Ahhh no, Jamie Fraser, I'm not going to Scotland on a motorcycle!! No way!” I spoke out of desperation when I saw the broad smile on that bloody Scott.

“Ye ken ye will... Claire!” the use of my name had been on purpose, as well as the way it was said, slowly, heavily accentuated R that he knew provoked me certain reactions.

“That's not fair! Not at all!! You...you...”

“Bloody Scott! I ken Sassenach, but I never said it would be fair, only that I would collect the favors ye owe me...” and with his owl wink, he kept watching me satisfied while I finished packing my things.

I knew that one day those damn favors would still turn against me! Just like that damned Scottish accent that made me accept anything that came out of that mouth!

_**POV Jamie** _

It was funny how much I knew all of Claire's reactions. I knew exactly how to provoke her in a way that she would accept everything I asked for, not that I think that one day she would refuse something I asked for, she is too good for that, even more with people with whom she cares a lot. I'm so full of myself, huh? But we had reached this level of intimacy that I knew I could count on her for everything and vice versa.

We took a few more hours for her to pack the rest of her things while she listed the reasons for which she wished my death and how she would do it after this trip. It also took a while to give all the recommendations to Mary who was trying to get serious while I was making faces behind my friend, as if I was disproving everything she was saying. Yeah, my joy didn't last long, she saw me through the reflection of the mirror and I spent the rest of the time making ties for the flower arrangements that Claire wanted to leave ready. And she knew how I hated it.

When we arrived at my apartment, I was so exhausted of Claire asking me about all the details of the trip. And I regretted it immensely when I made the observation that women cared about many unnecessary things on a trip, it earned me another speech about how men were childish and futile. But even with all this, I still got excited to show another gift I had for her, besides the giant backpack that she hadn't been very happy.

“Jamie! Are you crazy? It must have cost a fortune!” she said practically screaming when she opened the box that had a complete leather outfit to travel by motorcycle in style, and safety too, of course.

“Nothing that a tongue can't solve, I mean, some pleasure...ahhh ye got it!” she looked at me blushed, but started laughing when she saw me choking on words. When had I stayed like this for babbling nonsense with my friend? “Anyway, I saved up on the plane tickets...”

“And you really take this motorcycle trip stuff seriously... does your clothes match mine?” I knew she was making fun and I kept quiet because it really matched.

“Now let's eat something and go to sleep, I didna ken it would take ye hours to pack and get some flowers arrangements ready...” she looked at me with a frown. “Tomorrow I want to leave before six in the morning, nothing better than to see the sunrise on the road!”

“I hope you've already thought about how to bring a big bottle of coffee for me to drink on the way if you really want me to enjoy this wonderful sunrise!”

“Ye ken ye'll be wearing a helmet, aye? And that ye won't be able to drink anything on the way? And dinna even look at me like that, I already have our stops scheduled and I dinna intend to do anything before because of yer need for caffeine! And pee!” I knew she would say that when she started to open her mouth.

“And then you got angry when I questioned you about the trip schedule, for someone who says it is a "free spirit" she made a point of doing the quotes and imitating me talking “you have a very well-organized schedule!”

“I just didna want to follow yer schedule Sassenach, even more because ye dinna ken anything on the way to Scotland!”

She thought about answering something, but gave up, shrugging her shoulders and going to my room to change clothes. She really didn't know anything about the path we would take and I had never seen such a bad person in geography and location as Claire. I knew that if I let her out at Lallybroch, she would never find her way back to the house. I laughed when I thought that I could really do this to see how she would do, but it would be evil and surely she would never forgive me. I decided to stop thinking about stupid things like that and start making dinner because this was another thing that Claire was terrible at, cooking!

I was so anxious for this trip that I ended up waking up before the several alarms that I had put on my cell phone. I looked to the side and Claire was knocked out and that was because of me, after all I had to make it worth the purchase of that leather clothes. I got up and went to fix the last details, as well as make a giant cup of coffee for my grumpy friend in the morning. The mission to get her out of bed was almost impossible, but I managed without further delays in my schedule.

When we were leaving the building with backpacks on our backs, I mean, backpack, yeah, this had caused Claire's wrath to know that she would carry all our stuff, but it was impossible for me to carry anything and for her to have space to sit comfortably behind me. But anyway, when we were leaving, I saw Mrs. McNab standing in the hallway and with a disapproving look in our direction, she didn't waste time picking up her cell phone. I was sure it was to warn my sister that I was leaving home with a woman, probably she even knew we were going to Lallybroch.

Finally, after several adjustments of positions on the bike, we were taking the highway that would take us to Scotland and we were rewarded with a wonderful sunrise. Claire squeezed me in the waist, as if confirming that I was right about this. I knew that my friend would have a bit of discomfort in her first long motorcycle trip, she was not used to spend several hours sitting and even more carrying a certain weight. I tried to lighten the weight of the backpack with my things as I still had some clothes in Lallybroch, but even so I knew it would not be easy for her.

We had at least four or five hours to the border of Scotland, which was where we would spend the rest of the day and night to rest, but until we got there we stopped in some places to stretch a little our back and legs. And I could not fail to observe when Claire got off the bike when we stopped near Birmingham that I had chosen well those leather pants, it left the curves of her body in greater evidence, just like that damn black jeans of the day in the pub that had driven me crazy. But we had no time for that and no place either!

The trip continued without any major problems, once or twice I felt Claire squeeze me when I speeded a little more or overtake a car in a way that I knew she was scared of. But in other moments her grip was soft, to show that she was amazed with the landscapes that only got better as we approached Scotland. Then a few more hours passed and we finally reached the destination I had chosen to spend the night, even if it was still a little after midday.

“Gretna Green? What city is that?” Claire questioned as she took off her helmet and observed the name in front of her. “And why are we in front of a parish?”

“Because we are getting married Sassenach!” I tried to get serious, but I couldn't when I saw my friend widening her eyes and losing all the color on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pleeease don't kill me! 😜😆 Monday is not so far away...


	13. Chapter 13

_**POV Claire** _

I am a person who does not like to lose control of things. I always planned everything in my life, of course things didn't always go as planned, but I like to have a routine, to know what I would do in my days and even if I was going to travel for leisure, I would like to have an itinerary to follow, a planning. But that ended when I met Jamie and he took over my life in a way I never imagined I would let anyone do.

Now I was traveling to Scotland on the back of a motorcycle, totally trusting my friend about the places we would pass through and the final destination. I had no idea where Lallybroch, the Frasers' property, was, I had a vague notion of Scotland, where the best-known cities were and that was all. But of course, if I were to make this trip alone, I would research everything before and would have the necessary information to make the best use of each place. But Jamie didn't let me do it, he didn't even give me the opportunity to look for something, or time either. I had never packed my things so fast and without even knowing if what I was taking would be the right one.

Now we had traveled several miles and we were at the border of England with Scotland, in a place that I had never heard of before, Gretna Green. But my amazement at the moment was not because of the place itself but the words spoken by my best friend.

“I'm just kidding Sassenach...” he said laughing as he held me by the arms, probably I was looking like someone about to faint. “But it's good to ken yer reaction to this proposal, I'm glad I didna plan this trip with the purpose of declaring myself to ye, can ye imagine the disappointment that would be to have to take my future bride to the hospital after passing out in front of the church?” He said mockingly, but I couldn't put my thoughts in place, after all what had been that joke?

“Idiot!” was what I could say when I saw that he still had a silly smile on his face when he saw that I was still scared. “You just caught me off guard, not that I... I mean, actually I...” the words were coming out of order because I didn't know what to say.

“Sassenach, dinna fash, ye dinna have to explain yourself, I just wanted to scare ye really. And I think I was successful!” I ended up slapping his arm as an answer. “But now seriously, I brought ye here because besides being almost the middle of our journey, I find the story of this place interesting and wanted to show ye.”

“What's so interesting about Gretna Green?” I asked really interested and knew how every Scot liked to tell stories.

“Well, here historically it is the first Scottish village, of course on the route from London to Edinburgh. And it became famous because of the weddings, something ye may have noticed already. In the 18th century Lord Hardwicke created a law in which the parents of a child under 21 could forbid the union if they wanted. This in England and Wales, but in Scotland this law was not applied, here it was possible to get married without the parents’ permission, if the boys were 14 years old and the girls 12, aye, it is a precocious country” he laughed when he saw my astonishment to this information. “So, when they built the road that linked this small village to England, here it became the closest destination to the border for "illegal" marriages. That's because in Scotland to get married ye only needed a statement before two witnesses. Nothing very complicated to accomplish and of course here this law still exists, but it is no longer practiced, of marriage being validated without any authority present. Anyway, Gretna became famous for it and now invested in weddings, people like all the stories and folklore around this small town. Speaking of that, let's visit some places they promise to be the best to get married, but dinna worry, I just want to see if the food is as good as they say, the ceremony we leave for later!”

I was still trying to absorb all the information he had given me, that I ended up not caring about the observation about the wedding again. Actually, Scotland was an interesting country, full of stories, legends and peculiarities that only left me more curious to know more and I had a slight impression that this was just the first different destination that Jamie would take me. And I was right, the next destination was a museum called "The Devil's Porridge Museum", which despite its peculiar name, was to honor the HM Factory Gretna, the largest munitions factory in the world during the First World War.

Wars were not something that fascinated me, but it was interesting to know that in such a small town in Scotland, weapons so powerful were manufactured that they destroyed a much larger space than they occupied in the world. Jamie looked like a child in a toy store, not because he liked weapons, but because he liked to tell stories and was becoming a better guide than the audios that accompanied us during the walk. I couldn't hide the pride I was feeling inside me for having a friend who surprised me every day, I had no idea how much knowledge Jamie had about the history of his country and how his eyes shone for talking about the importance of his people in great events, even if they were not so happy.

“Jamie, I know you probably already have our next destination planned, but can we eat something first? The caffeine I had in my system is gone and now my stomach is complaining.”

“Dinna fash Sassenach! I won't let ye starve! Now our next destination is Caerlaverock Castle. We're going to ride a little bit on the road, but lucky we're riding a motorcycle, the road is a little narrow and I'm sure ye'd hate it if it was by car!” and without letting me say anything else, threw me the helmet that was in his hand. I was still hungry, but by the way he had something important planned.

He was actually right about the road and I thanked for having a friend who was also a great driver! When we arrived at the destination, I was not prepared for what was before me. I had already visited several castles, but this one really left me speechless. It was imposing because it was all made of stones, like a fortress and it was, according to Jamie. That's why it was built that way, surrounded by water with a bascule bridge that led us to the entrance. It was not in good condition, it had suffered with the wars throughout the centuries for being so close to England and even though it was rebuilt in some parts, it still presented the marks of the battles.

But what impressed me most was the huge green field around it. It was wonderful and with the sunny day that we had been lucky Scotland gave us, that was the perfect place to relax after a long trip. Jamie told me some facts about the place, but I saw that he was impatient pulling me by the arm to a big tree that was a little far from the castle:

“Sassenach, I ken ye like to be outdoors, so I thought we could eat something here, so we can observe the castle, but still be far enough away from those children who were screaming and jumping thinking they are fighting against invisible enemies of the last century.”

I laughed at his observation, there was actually a group of children who were on a tour that seemed to have been scheduled by their parents to distract them, with a guide who invented fights and conflicts. It was fun to watch, but after a while it became a bit annoying the screams and noises. While thinking about what he had said, I saw that he was stirring the big backpack which was now in his possession and I couldn't hide the amazement when I saw him taking off a big plaid tablecloth. We were going to have a picnic and he had thought of all the details! Jamie Fraser couldn't stop surprising me!

_**POV Jamie** _

I couldn't hide my enthusiasm by presenting some of my country's history to Claire, even though some stories were a bit fanciful or full of romanticism, after all that was Scotland. But by the constant smile on my friend's face, she was enjoying it just as much as I did, being there. I knew I had tired her a little with everything we had done in those few hours, even more so after spending hours sitting on the back of the bike.

The picnic had not been something I planned in advance, actually while I was thinking where we could stop to eat, I saw that there wasn't any interesting restaurant in that region and since the landscapes were too beautiful to be wasted, I took advantage when Claire was distracted in the museum that we visited previously and bought some snacks in the cafeteria of the place, it was not sophisticated at all, but it would take the edge off our hunger. I knew I had brought a plaid tablecloth because my intention to have a picnic was in Lallybroch, but I would not miss that opportunity.

The sunny day had helped my idea and while we ate the many unhealthy things I had bought, we watched from afar the few people who entered and left the castle, trying to create stories of why they were there and what their lives were like. As it was warmer than we expected, we ended up changing our traveling clothes for more comfortable ones to visit the tourist places. I had put on a torn and comfortable jeans along with a simple white T-shirt, but Claire surprised me by putting on a pair of denim shorts and as if she wanted to match me, a white T-shirt too. The pair of military style-boots used to travel were still there and the whole thing together had left me a little stunned.

“I think I ate too fast!” she spoke as she lay on the tablecloth.

“Also, it seemed like ye hadn't seen food in front of ye in years!” And I lay down next to her. The shade of the tree left us in a more than comfortable position to rest a bit.

“And I really hadn’t, my best friend has been exploiting me and leaving me hungry!” she turned her face to me and laughed.

“Sassenach! How dare ye say these things about me? If it's for someone to feel hurt in all this, it should be me, these months by yer side are not being easy...”

“You'll still regret complaining about it all the time...lucky for you I'm too tired to argue anymore.” And she looked up again, closing her eyes while taking a deep breath.

I just laughed and took my cell phone, a song now would be great to rest a bit and then go on for the rest of the trip. I opened Spotify and of course I was on some Claire's playlist, after all she insisted that I had a terrible taste for music and I was lucky she was by my side to change that. I put it to play without at least seeing what it was, but obviously it would be a pop song that stick in your head, Claire loved listening to these songs while she worked, even though she didn't confess it to everyone.

I saw that she started moving her lips as if she was singing silently, just following the rhythm of the song. I didn't know the lyrics and I started to pay attention to them, the melody was nice to hear, even though I am tone-deaf for it. The words were going into my head and I turned to the side to observe my best friend singing the song softly:

**So, lock the door and throw out the key** **  
Can't fight this no more, it's just you and me  
And there's nothin' I, nothin' I, I can do  
I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you  
So, go ahead and drive me insane  
Baby, run your mouth, I still wouldn't change  
Being stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you  
I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you, baby **

[ **https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2jvHynuMjI** ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2jvHynuMjI)

I couldn't stop looking at her, at her mouth moving at the rhythm of the music, it seemed somewhat hypnotizing and the next thing I knew she was staring at me with the same intensity. We stayed like this for a minute, while the music was the only noise in the surroundings. I saw that she swallowed hard, as if she was creating courage to do something, I ran my tongue on my lips in anticipation, I knew what I wanted to do and I didn't need the courage she was gathering. In a quick motion I turned my body and stopped on top of hers, leaning my arms on the side of her head. I faced her once again, as if it were a request for permission, which she seemed to have answered with a blink of an eye.

This was what it took for me to take her mouth in an intense kiss, without shame or delicacy. She returned in the same way, biting my lower lip hard, which made me just want to invade her mouth completely with my tongue. I felt her hands on me, one running down my back under my shirt and the other in my ass, pulling me closer to her. I couldn't help but answer that and my body pressed her more against the ground, I didn't know if I was hurting her, but she didn't complain. My lips left hers just to go down to her neck, where I ended up biting her hard in response to another grip on my body.

My hand was now going up under her shirt, reaching into her breasts. Ugh, I didn't like it when she was wearing a bra, but that didn't stop me from feeling her, I caressed her slowly with my finger and didn't need to see to know that I had given her the chills. Her hands were as restless as mine and I soon felt her trying to open the zipper of my jeans. The music that was playing in the background suddenly changed and became louder and that caught our attention, making us both stop what we were doing. And that's when we looked at each other, faces flushed, bite marks on the neck, T-shirts up...but we were in the middle of an open field, near a castle with several people visiting. Yes, we stopped at the right time.

“I think we entertained some people who were looking for fun in the castle...” she spoke with a shy smile, her face was still flushed.

“At least we made worth the price of the ticket!” I completed laughing and she ended up relaxing, laughing too.

After recovering our breath and dignity, we tidied up the things we had spread on the grass and went towards the bike, we still had a lot to do until we arrived in Lallybroch. I did not like to ride the road at night, even more being with someone on the bike, but the good part of being almost in the European summer, were the long days, which took longer to darken. With this we gained time and did not need to spend the night there as I had planned before.

We travelled a few miles in my dear Scotland and as we approached Glasgow, we were gifted once again, now with a wonderful sunset. Claire squeezed me hard and I heard her try to speak something I could not understand because of the noise and the helmet, but this made me worry to the point of stopping the bike on the roadside.

“Did something happen Sassenach?” I asked worried as soon as I took off my helmet.

“No, but I wanted to see it calmly...” she answered as she pointed to the sunset.

I smiled, grabbing my cell phone that was in my pocket. That deserved a picture! The sun, my Scotland and my Sassenach. At that moment I was sure that that motorcycle trip had been my best idea so far.


	14. Chapter 14

_**POV Claire** _

Intense. That was the word I had to describe this trip to Scotland until now and we had not even reached our final destination yet. Jamie kept surprising me with every detail planned, but more than him, that country kept surprising me with every landscape, detail and history. It had been a long time since I had traveled, the last few years had been spent in London with almost no time off so that I could accomplish my dream of opening the flower shop and even before that, with the several moves I had made with my parents; nothing had been as spectacular as it is now.

My father was always methodical, we moved from city to city so he could work and develop his career as a surgeon. This did not include visiting the tourist places or knowing the history of the city to which we were moving. Of course, he always showed me a thing or two about the place, but it didn't seem that he was the brother of a great archaeologist who traveled the world for work and was passionate about every detail, every place he knew. I had traveled a few times with my uncle Lamb and those trips were the best of my life, but now this one to Scotland was gaining a bigger place among them, was it for the place or the company? Actually, it was both and now I had to admit that Jamie was right going through the long hours on that bike I hated so much, it was worth a lot and would not be the same going by train.

We arrived in Glasgow faster than I imagined, barely had darkened and we were already in front of the small hotel that we would spend the night. But I was a little confused, I was sure I heard Jamie telling me that our route was London-Edinburgh, after all Lallybroch was in that direction. And why were we in Glasgow? I may not have been as good at geography as my friend used to say, but I knew the direction of our destination was wrong. I waited for Jamie to park the bike in a small spot near the hotel and questioned him.

“Shouldn't we have gone to Edinburgh? I'm sure you said Lallybroch was close by!”

“But we are going there, but tomorrow! I thought it would be good for us to rest here...or did ye get so excited to ride on my bike that ye want to spend more hours behind me?” he answered by arching his eyebrow and looking at me in a way I knew very well.

“Has anyone ever said that you're too overbearing?”

“Aye, ye, always.” I looked at him with a frown. “Sassenach, Glasgow is part of my itinerary, ye're not wrong, aye, we would go straight to Edinburgh, but I thought I'd take this slight detour to show a little of the city I lived in for five years while I was studying.”

For a moment I didn't know what to answer, there he was wanting to share a little more of his life with me and I always ignored my best friend with my practicalities! He probably noticed my features and started laughing.

“Sassenach, dinna fash, I ken ye didna know I studied here and much less that I would show ye this on the trip! But let's stop talking! We have a bar to go to, I want to show ye the place I spent several nights during my college life!” And he was already pulling my arm.

“Jamie Fraser! You can stop! Don't even think for a minute that I'm going to a bar now after spending all day traveling! Look at me!” I made sure to point me for him to see. “I need a shower, clean clothes and a miraculous brush in this hair! Now do me a favor and get the key to my room so I can be at least a decent company for you in this bar!”

“Any other demands, Your Highness?” he spoke bowing before me.

“Idiot!” and I hit his head lightly. “Since you insist, you can take a shower too, your hair doesn't look good after hours inside your helmet.”

He just rolled his eyes as an answer and went to the hotel reception to do what I had asked for. Of course, I should have waited for that, he returned only with a key in his hand saying that our room was not what I was used to in hotels, but it was what he could pay after spending everything with my leather clothes. Why did I think I would have a room all to myself? Jamie didn't even wait for a question from me and went up the stairs leading to our room. The hotel was old and simple, it had only one floor with a long corridor full of doors. It was not the worst place that I had stayed, but it was not the best either. The double bed was small, which made my friend already complained that he would probably stay with his legs out and besides it was very noisy, but I did not care about our accommodations, I was crazy to take that feeling of dust away from my body and relax my joints under the hot shower.

I soon realized that the water was not hot, not even close and I had to hurry my shower to not freeze. All right, I was being exaggerated, it wasn't so cold that day, but it had been a long time since I knew what it was to take a cold shower and that had been everything but relaxing. At least I was clean and while I got ready to go to the bar, Jamie went to take a shower and prove to me that I was very fussy about that. I didn't have many clothing options, so I put on a basic black dress, shirt style that was very comfortable.

My hair was still a horror, I didn't have the courage to wash it in that cold water and the only solution for it was a bun. I tied it the way I could and put on a red lipstick, at least now my face was not of someone who had woken up at five in the morning and traveled all day. While I finished putting my boots, which was the most comfortable shoe I had there with me, Jamie left the bathroom claiming that the water was great and that I liked to complain. When he finally looked at me, I saw that his eyes widened and for a minute he stood there without saying anything.

“Has the cold water taken away your ability to think?” I laugh when I stop in front of him.

“Are ye going like this?” he asked with his voice in a high tone that was not something expected from Jamie Fraser.

“Why? Is something wrong?” I answered pretending to look at my dress for something.

“No, it's just...aye, I dinna really see ye wearing much...dress...” his sentence came out stuttered and I couldn't hold my laugh.

“You didn't see me wearing several things Fraser...” and with that I left the room. I knew that if I stayed there, we would never go to the bar.

I was sitting on the small sofa that was in the hotel reception when minutes later, Jamie emerged from the stairs in all his glory. He was wearing black ripped jeans, a black T-shirt that showed very well his defined muscles of the abdomen and arms. His hair was loose and still a little wet, making a great pair with his stubble. Yeah, he had done it on purpose to get revenge for what I said in the room.

“Shall we?” I said when I got up from the couch and extended my hand to him.

He opened that smile that I knew very well and agreed with his head. The bar was nearby and while we walked the streets of Glasgow, he was telling me a little of his routine in the years he lived and studied there. Even though he didn't need to, he wanted to work while he was studying, he didn't want to stay there spending his father's money like his colleagues did, going from party to party without caring about anything. But of course, he wasn't a monk, even doing a paid internship and studying in the morning, he still had the energy to attend this bar almost every weekend.

When we arrived at the place, it wasn't anything I imagined. It wasn't a very popular place among the students, being attended by older people, who in this case were our age, but for a Jamie who was a student, it was a rather "old" company. But he said that the drinks there were good, cheap and they tried to put local bands to play, helping those who were trying to start a career. And he was not wrong to say that he always went there, as soon as we entered the few employees of the place made a fuss when they saw Jamie and I could not stop smiling when I saw how much he was loved by everybody. How I hated this natural friendliness of my friend, I was the total opposite. Not that I was unkind, but people took time to see how I really was.

We sat at a table that was in a privileged position, not too close to the small stage, but we could see everything that was happening. It wasn't close to the counter where the drinks were served either, in short, we were VIPs customers! And it didn't take long for our table to be full of things, servings of "fish and chips" in my honor, special bottle of whisky for Jamie and a few more shots of things I had no idea what they were.

“You really made a good impression in this place! Or you've had too much to drink here for them to give back what you spent!”

“Probably both” he laughed. “But I have to confess something, one of the owners here is a distant cousin...”

“Of course! Why does that still surprise me? Everywhere we go you know someone and he is your relative!”

“That's Scotland! The families are big and everybody is related. But anyway, I always liked it here. Of course, not paying the bill a few times after drinking with Rupert, my cousin, helped a lot in my choice of bar!”

We ended up getting excited with the conversation and the drinks. I knew I had already drunk too much, but the weather was nice, the conversation was nice too and the next thing I knew I was getting some coins from Jamie to put in a Jukebox that was in a hidden corner of the bar. My friend was laughing at me all the time because he swore that nobody had used it for a long time and that Rupert had bought it over the internet after seeing people in the bar singing in a movie, but it had never worked properly and nobody was interested in using it.

I spent more than ten minutes trying to see which song I would choose and that's when it appeared in front of me, I knew it would be the chosen one, since we were remembering our past, nothing better than a song that had been part of my lonely adolescence. When the first notes echoed through the bar, I saw that the few tables that were full looked amazed at me, just like Jamie and I couldn't contain the satisfied smile.

**If you want my future, forget my past  
If you wanna get with me, better make it fast  
Now don't go wasting my precious time  
Get your act together we could be just fine**

**I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want  
So tell me what you want, what you really, really want  
I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha)  
I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig ah  
If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends  
(Gotta get with my friends)  
Make it last forever, friendship never ends  
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give  
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is**

_**POV Jamie** _

Was she really singing Spice Girls in front of me? For the whole bar to see? Actually, she was dubbing while holding a bottle of whiskey as a microphone, but it was still something bold for my friend. Was I thinking it was bad? No, not even a little bit, even more with that dress that left her long legs out. She tried to pull me out of the chair to do almost a show with her, but no, I still didn't have so much alcohol in my body to accomplish so much.

But she didn't seem to care since some people joined the choir with her and soon, they were all on the small stage of the bar doing a show that I think Rupert would never have imagined could happen when he bought that Jukebox. I couldn't hold back the smile when I saw Claire completely loose singing that song so willingly. Of course, I didn't waste time picking up my cell phone and filming some of that show, she would have to see it later to believe in everything she did.

For a moment I was lost only in her face while watching her sing. Her whisky colored eyes were shining in a way I'd never seen before and for a moment our eyes crossed and she seemed to stare at me while reciting the words of that song:

**If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends** **  
(Gotta get with my friends)  
Make it last forever, friendship never ends  
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give  
(You've got to give)  
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is**

The lyrics to the song had nothing sexy about it, but I have to confess that seeing her singing like that and with so much energy, it was provoking things in me that were starting to get out of my control. Of course, her being in a short dress didn't help at all! When the song was ending, she started to come towards me, gesturing as if she was doing a choreography, a little clumsy I must say. But she seemed to laugh at the situation too and while I thought it was funny, she sat on my lap to sing the last words, taking me totally by surprise.

“The good thing about being in a bar in Scotland is that we don't need to hide from anyone...” she whispered in my ear.

The music had already changed, but I wasn't paying attention anymore, her body rubbing on mine wasn't letting me reason, much less her naughty smile. I looked to the side looking for Rupert, he was leaning on the counter paying attention to people who were still excited about the soundtrack. In a quick motion, I got up from the chair pulling Claire with me carefully so she didn't fall. She seemed not to care because she laughed at my face that was probably of a desperate man.

I took her by the arm and we walked fast to the back of the bar, on the way I just nodded to Rupert who understood my message very well. I opened the heavy door and after we were already in the small alley at the back of the bar, I closed it with strength.

“Jamie! What are we doing here?” she asked with a light smile on her face, she knew very well what we were doing there.

“Do ye think ye can keep doing all that in front of me and come out free?”

“Me? What was I doing?” she laughed and took steps backwards, but she didn't have much where to go and soon she was near the wall.

“Sassenach, I think ye ken very well...” and without giving time for an answer, I approached her quickly and pressed my body against hers.

I faced her for a few seconds before kissing her violently, forcing her body against the wall. I heard a little moan from her and that only made my body press hers harder, I wanted her to feel what she was doing to me and I'm sure she noticed quickly as she lifted one of her legs around my waist. I knew she was not comfortable, so I pulled her legs firmly around my body and with that she was suspended, just leaning on the wall and on me. One of my hands was lifting her dress while kissing and biting her neck, I couldn't wait any longer, I needed her right then and there.

My fingers pushed her panties aside and I saw that she was ready for me and smiled between the kisses. While I was busy with this, I felt her hands trying to open my jeans and soon her hand was caressing me, leaving me breathless for a second.

“Sassenach...I need...to be inside ye...now!” My words were interrupted as she increased the intensity of her caresses.

“But Jamie... someone might see...” she spoke with difficulty as my fingers went in and out of her, leaving her more and more bewildered.

“Do ye want to stop?” I spoke as my fingers moved faster, my lips coming closer to the back of her ear where I knew it drove her crazy.

“No...but...”

“Sassenach...I'll ask ye one more time, do ye want me to stop?” My thumb was massaging and I knew she was close to losing control. “Answer me!”

“No!” she answered loudly when she reached the climax.

I didn't waste any time, I finished opening the zipper of my jeans and thrust her hard, all at once. Her head went backwards, hitting the wall, but I only got a groan as a response to my movements. She had closed her eyes, caught in the pleasure I was giving her, but I wanted to see those whiskey-colored eyes shining for me.

“Open yer eyes Sassenach!”

“Huh?” she whispered as she followed my rhythm with her hip.

“Open yer eyes, I want ye to see what ye are doing to me!”

At that same moment she opened her eyes wide, as if she didn't expect me to say that. And all I saw there was desire and a glow that I knew was only for me, only I left her like that, only I could get those noises out of her that I liked so much to hear, only me. She seemed to have the same possessiveness, because her legs tightened more around my waist, her mouth bit my shoulder hard when she reached the second climax of the night, being followed soon by mine, which was muffled by bites on her neck.

We stayed a few minutes in silence, both trying to catch our breath and calm our heartbeat. I was still holding Claire, but little by little I was releasing her legs so she could move again without any accident, she had already drunk a little and let's say our activities were intense. While we were fixing our clothes, I heard her laughing low.

“What is so funny Sassenach?”

“I can already cross off my bucket list to have sex in a public place!”

“Oh, but here it's not even very public, Rupert is taking care of the door so no one can come back here by mistake...”

“What? Does he know what we were doing here?” she practically yelled at me.

“Of course he kens, well, he may not ken everything, but he kens that we didna come here to put out the garbage or to check the merchandise that arrived!”

“Is merchandise arriving now? At this hour?” her eyes were wide open.

“Sassenach, let's go back to ye being pleased that ye finally had sex in a public place? Something yer dull ex never had the courage to do...”

“Great time for you to remind me of that asshole Frank, my panties are already dry!” She made a face and I laughed.

“My friend has so much class...then they say I'm the one who takes ye down the wrong road...”

We talked until we were back at the bar, but we only came back for me to pay the bill and thank Rupert for the "privacy". The day had been long and I knew Claire couldn't wait to rest, but who knows we couldn't continue the night at the hotel? When we arrived in the room, she more than quickly threw herself into bed, said that her back was killing because a certain someone had mistreated her against a hard brick wall. I laughed and went to the bathroom.

When I returned to the room, Claire was in the same position as before, but in a deep sleep. I smiled when I saw that she was sleeping almost with a smile on her face, apparently, she was enjoying this trip as much as I was. With as much kindness as I could, I took off her clothes and laid her under the covers, just lying next to her. I took a deep breath and could feel the famous vanilla perfume she was wearing, I closed my eyes and probably slept with a smile on my face too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank you all for the comments and kudos! I'm very happy with how this story is going! ❤❤❤


	15. Chapter 15

_**POV Claire** _

I opened my eyes and soon felt the persistent pain in my head. Its cause was somewhat doubtful, was it the amount of whisky I had drunk, of hitting a brick wall insistently or the two things together? Probably the last option, but I couldn't deny that I had fun, even with the tiredness of the trip and that feeling of being hit by a truck. Of course, this truck has a name, Jamie Fraser, who was sitting on my side of the bed laughing at something that I already knew what it was.

“Did you have to record that?” I asked with my voice still hoarse when I heard the Spice Girls melody coming from his cell phone.

“Do ye still have to ask? Obviously, I wouldn't miss the opportunity to have with me a permanent record of my friend becoming a member of a 90's girl band! And I can say that ye are good, if ye had been born before, who kens, ye wouldn't have been able to pursue a career?”

“Idiot! One day I'll record something embarrassing that you do when you're drunk!”

“This will be a bit difficult, I rarely get drunk and ye sober, besides, I never do anything embarrassing, unless ye want to record a video of us, but then it would be a bit risky to keep it on yer phone!” He couldn't get serious while talking and noticed my face getting worse and worse with every suggestion he made.

“I will totally ignore what you suggested and just demand my coffee. You can also bring me a pain killer because it was totally your fault!”

“I didna hear any protests yesterday...” he raised one of his eyebrows while looking at me from top to bottom.

I just rolled my eyes in response, getting up from bed to take a shower. And that's when I found out that it really looked like I'd been run over, my legs were sore as if I'd run a marathon, something I had no idea what it was like, but from the pain I felt, it could only be that!

“Someone needs to do more exercises than just yoga, she is not able to handle her Scottish friend anymore...”

He knew I would say something in response and left the room quickly, without giving me time to throw at him the first thing that was in front of me. Lucky for him, I was very slow and the only thing near me was a pillow, it wouldn't be funny at all. I entered the bathroom and never was so grateful for a cold shower in my life. When I finished, I was gifted with a giant cup of coffee and an Advil. In addition, I thanked my best friend for his silence, who preferred to wait until caffeine kicked in to tell me what we would do that morning.

I thought we'd be going to Lallybroch by now, after all it was Friday and I knew Jamie's sister was waiting for us for lunch. But my friend had not yet finished his little tour of Scotland and took me to meet the University of Glasglow, a place he had attended for some years to complete his degree in Business. I couldn't not be enchanted by the magnificent architecture of that building, I had already seen pictures, but nothing compared to see it live. Of course, my favorite guide couldn't leave me without some curiosities about his so loved university. It was the fourth oldest, at least that the official language was English and had already been the choice of seven Nobel Prize winners. And even with all these great features, it was relatively cheap near other prestigious universities in the UK.

I could see in my friend's eyes how proud he was of the place he had chosen to study, and while he was telling me all about his favorite places, his hand was holding mine, squeezing every time he got excited about some funny or interesting detail. We didn't used to walk holding hands, but I felt so comfortable being like this with Jamie that I didn't mind continuing our tour of the University that way. But when we were approaching the parking lot where we had left the bike, I noticed that my friend's grip had intensified and when I looked at him, I saw in his face something that was not there minutes ago.

“Jamie? Is everything okay?” I asked already knowing that he was not, it was clear on his face.

“Sassenach...I, uh, I wasn't completely honest with ye about our visit to Lallybroch...”

“What do you mean? What about this visit you didn't want to tell me?” I was worried now, Jamie wasn't a person who used to lie, at least not to me.

“Jenny, my sister...she doesn't ken that ye're going with me and much less that we're going by motorcycle! She sent me the money to buy the plane tickets and...”

“Jamie Fraser!” I yelled at him interrupting. “You haven't seen your family for months and you're still going to arrive with a friend that they have no idea exists and are not even waiting for!”

“Sassenach, they ken ye exist after all they ken where I work, but...well, it's just that my sister doesn't like my bike and much less that I quit my perfect job to become a flower delivery boy...”

“Great! And now you appear with the person who ended your promising career to become a mere delivery boy!”

“My career has never been promising at my uncles' company, Sassenach, dinna fash”. He spoke as he saw me walking from one side to the other in the parking lot. “I will talk to my sister, I already knew she would pick on me, that's why I brought ye along! I'm sure ye two will get along very well, ye both like to boss me around!” He laughed, but I kept looking at him with a frown.

“You didn't convince me, but there's nothing I can do now except wait for us to go back to London and kill you without a trace. For now, I still depend on you to go back home and commit a crime against a Scotsman in his homeland would not be the smartest thing to do!”

“Seriously, ye'll be best friends by Sunday!” 

I didn't know if he was just saying that to make me feel better, but now I was feeling butterflies in my stomach that I wasn't feeling before. Would his family like me? After all, they weren't waiting for a person to accompany Jamie back home, much less a woman! One who had given the job they disgusted, the job that had left him away from his family. Great! It would make a great impression, but I couldn't get mad at my friend when I took him to dinner at my parents' house and I had a feeling that Jenny wasn't as tough as Henry Beauchamp, impossible, after all she was Jamie's sister, the most affectionate guy I had ever met.

We got on the bike and headed for Lallybroch. I had so many things on my mind, wondering what the rest of the weekend would be like, that I didn't even realize when the Highlands landscape became our setting. A light touch on my leg caught my attention and I turned my head to see something that made my heart stop for a minute. That was wonderful! How had I never thought of visiting this place? I could notice an instant calm take over my body, all my anxiety about meeting Jamie's family disappeared as I admired the scenery we were going through. 

After a while on a winding road, I noticed that Jamie was slowing down. Again, I felt his hand on my leg, squeezing me lightly and when I looked in the direction he was pointing, I had no reaction. Was that Lallybroch? They lived in a castle? And on a giant estate? I couldn't help thinking that if Frank had been impressed by my parents' Victorian home, if he'd seen that, he'd probably have an orgasm. I laughed when I imagined it, but as my friend said, "fuck Frank," he was no longer a part of my life.

When we stopped the motorcycle minutes later at the more than majestic entrance of the property, we were greeted by several children screaming "Uncle Jamie" and soon I identified them as Jenny and Ian's children. And Jamie had not exaggerated when he said that his sister could put together a soccer team...but the children's fuss was soon muffled by a strong voice coming from inside the house.

“And of course, my stubborn brother came by motorcycle! Ian had told me about this stupid idea, but I didna think ye would consider it!”

And then a woman with long black hair appeared in front of us. She was the complete opposite of Jamie. She was a lot shorter than me, but it didn't seem to diminish her magnificence and presence in the place at all. Her blue eyes were the same as her brother's and now they stared at me with curiosity.

“Besides that, he brought company! To whom do I owe the honor of thanking for putting up with my brother for more than eight hours of travel?”

“Claire Beauchamp.” I spoke stretching out my hand. “The mad woman who faced sitting on that motorcycle for hours, but only because he promised me the best whisky in Scotland as a reward!” and Jenny's face that had remained serious until then, changed, giving space to a small smile.

_**POV Jamie** _

“So this is the famous Claire! For a while I thought ye were making someone up just so I would stop picking on ye, but Mrs. McNab told me that a tall girl, who looked like she was always hungry, was always in yer place...”

“Há! I knew she was sending ye messages to tell ye about my life! Jenny, I dinna need someone to take care of my life, I already have ye and Ian who can do it very well, even from a distance!” I answered to my sister who laughed.

“And how do ye think we can do it so well? We have people who tell us things, because if we were to depend on ye...I wouldna even ken that Claire is real and that ye were dating...”

“We're not dating!” Claire interrupted our conversation quickly. “He's just my best friend, one who won't let go of me, but since I am compassionate, I end up spending a lot of time with him...” I knew she was trying to be funny, I even opened a smile, but I also knew that nothing would convince my sister otherwise.

“Um, friends...ok, nowadays things are so modern that I dinna follow anymore! I'll ask Ian to clean the guest room then!”

“No need, I thought Claire could stay in yer old room, next to mine, so it's easier in case she needs anything. Besides, it's better to stay away from the kids' room, she's not used to the energy of those little bairns!” I said by pinching Maggie and Wee Jamie lightly.

“Jamie!” Claire caught my attention, looking at me seriously.

“Sassenach, dinna fash, my sister kens that not everyone is willing to put up with her children...”

She kept looking at me angry and hit me in the arm. My sister just shrugged and continued walking toward the back door of the house. I knew that the matter had not faded and that I would still be asked about Claire. When we entered the house, the first thing I felt was the smell of Mrs. Crook's wonderful food, how I missed it! I noticed that my friend was still looking at everything around her with amazement, probably she wasn't used to the excitement of such a full house.

From what little I knew of her parents, everything in their house was full of rules and with little human warmth. In Lallybroch, the house was rarely empty, of course, only my sister and the children already filled any room, but there was always someone there. It could be one of the several employees of the property who went after the sweets Mrs. Crook made or someone from Broch Mordha who knew my family for years and liked to stop by for a chat. Of course, most of the time they just wanted to keep up with the gossip and Jenny was the person who knew everyone's life there. Since Ian spent all day at the distillery, she ended up taking care of everyone around her, the problem that sometimes she missed the worry limit. Even so, everyone there respected her a lot and didn't dare to disrespect her.

That was something I didn't miss. To have my life watched over by everyone and more than that, being interfered by everyone. Of course, Jenny still knew what I was doing or not doing in London, thanks to my gossipy neighbor, but I was relieved to know I could make my decisions without being judged by a dozen people who thought they could do it because they changed my diapers when I was a baby:

\- Uncle Jamie! - was what I could hear before being attacked by my nephew Ian who jumped on me.

He hadn't welcomed us in front of the house because he was riding with Alec, who took care of the stables. Of course, from then on, I could not walk more than half a meter without him being stuck on my arm, wanting to tell me everything he had done until I arrived. I saw Claire was looking at us smiling and when I introduced her to my nephew, he soon included her in the conversation, calling her aunt. I saw that her eyes were wide when she heard the word coming out so naturally from Ian's mouth, but he was like this, treated everyone with great affection and my sister had taught her children to call everyone who was welcome in Lallybroch uncle or aunt.

When I finally managed to take Claire upstairs to show where the bedrooms were, I saw that she was with her head down, looking like a shy girl, something far away from her attitude minutes before with Jenny.

“Sassenach.” I spoke as I stopped in front of her and lifted her face to look at me. “I hope my family didna scare ye, I ken they can be a little intense, but Frasers are like that...well, ye ken that after all ye live with one almost every day.” I saw that she smiled with my words.

“Even that sometimes you worth ten when you make me lose my patience, but I wasn't expecting so much...”

“Affection? Attention?”

“Jamie, they think we are together, that I will be part of the family, your nephew called me Aunt Claire! Don't you think I'd better leave you alone with them? I don't want to...” but I interrupted her.

“Claire.” That got her attention. “Even though ye're just my friend, ye're already part of the family and nothing will change with yer presence here, by the way, ye're making more success with the kids than I am...and what Jenny thinks or doesn't think is her problem, we ken what we are, dinna we?” she just nodded her head in agreement and held me tight.

“Thank you for letting me be a part of your family.” I saw that she had tears in her eyes and I got my face close to hers.

“Uncle Jamie! Aunt Claire! Mommy said lunch is ready and the food will get cold if you take more time up there!” My older nephew Jamie's scream made us step back in a shock, making us laugh right after.

“I think we'd better go down soon, I don't want to provoke your sister's anger, she still likes me!”

“Ye can relax, the lunch interrogation won't be so intense, Ian will be there to calm the beast! I just think it's better to stay aware, she'll still catch ye alone at some point to ken yer intentions with her younger brother!”

I laughed when I saw the face Claire made. We went downstairs and to the large dining room where Jenny made sure to serve lunch since we were visiting. We usually had lunch at the big table in the kitchen, but I knew my sister wanted to show Claire that we could be civilized, even with the kids almost knocking the table down trying not to fight each other. Of course, a scream from their mother was enough for them to be quiet, but Ian's angry look threatened them a lot more, after all he was the one who left them grounded.

We spent hours sitting at the table, Ian was having fun with Claire, who told several stories that we had together, of course she always tried to make me look bad in all of them, causing laughter in my brother-in-law who said that I had found someone worse than Jenny to boss me around. I saw that my sister watched more than she participated in the conversation and I knew that look very well, she was just waiting for some slip from us to expose everything she thought. Lucky for me that didn't happen, because Ian invited Claire to visit the distillery with him that afternoon while I would take young Ian for the long-awaited horse ride.

I can't deny that it bothered me a little that invitation, after all I wanted to take her to visit the distillery, but I also knew I was in Lallybroch to spend more time with my nephews who missed me, especially Ian, who was the birthday boy and was always the most attached to me. And I saw the joy in his eyes when Jenny said that I would take him to ride on the property, just the two of us and no other adults. Claire also smiled at seeing my nephew running to get his things and signaled to me that everything was fine.

She and Ian left soon to the distillery since that was still a normal day's work for my brother-in-law. I waited for my nephew who didn't even take five minutes to get ready, with all the security equipment that Jenny insisted he use, even being with me. We went to the stable and there I was able to catch up with Donas, my horse that has always been angry with everyone but me. He was big and imposing, but when I approached, it seemed that he already felt and when I whispered a few words in Gaelic, his rage diminished and even accepted caresses from my nephew.

As we rode through the property, young Ian filled me with questions about what I was doing in London. For him it was something from another world since he had never left Lallybroch, let alone Scotland. He also wanted to know why I rode a motorcycle since riding a horse was much cooler and not dangerous like his mother talked about. I laughed as I imagined myself walking through the streets of London with Donas, they would find me a madman who probably wanted to be part of the royal guard.

“Are ye going to marry Aunt Claire?” My nephew asked me right after he asked me how I delivered flowers with the bike, as if it was something so trivial.

“Marry? Ian! I'm not marrying Claire.”

“But mom said ye're dating and wee Jamie said that adults date and then get married...”

“First, yer mom was wrong, we're not dating, and second, why was yer brother talking to ye about this?”

“Because Leery showed up one day yelling at mommy that one day she was going to marry ye, Uncle Jamie, and that a Sassenach wasn't going to steal ye away from her...”

I stood there for a few seconds with my mouth open. When Laoghaire had shown up at Lallybroch? And why hadn't my sister said anything to me? And how my six-year-old nephew could pronounce Sassenach perfectly and not get my ex's name right? So that's why they thought I was dating Claire! I saw that my nephew stood there looking at me a little confused, probably not understanding why I had remained silent and with the face of someone who had seen a ghost. I ended up changing the subject and we rode back to the stables.

When we returned to the house, I heard voices coming from the kitchen and when I approached, I recognized it as Jenny and Claire. While I wanted to quickly interrupt the moment between the two to save my friend from my sister's claws, I also wanted to know what they were talking about. I chose to wait and without making any noise, I began to pay attention to the conversation.

“I will tell ye Claire, I was amazed to see that Jamie had brought a guest, even more a woman...”

“Doesn't he usually bring friends to meet Lallybroch?”

“Most of his friends are cousins who already been here a lot, but what really amazed me is that ye are the first, and by the way the only woman he brought to Lallybroch and to meet the family in a moment as intimate as his nephew's birthday...”

“Uncle Jamie!” young Ian shouted scaring me and making them both look in the direction of where I was hiding. I saw Claire's frightened eyes and the satisfied smile on my sister's face. Fuck!


	16. Chapter 16

_**POV Claire** _

Lallybroch was everything and nothing I imagined. Confused? Yes. I knew it would be a wonderful place for everything Jamie had told me, about his childhood, about how his parents built all that estate and how proud they were of those achievements. But even knowing all these things, nothing had prepared me for the feeling that that place was bringing me. During all the years I moved from city to city, from country to country with my parents, I had never felt at home. Not even when we returned to London and stabilized in that huge house.

In my parents' house everything seemed to have rules, how to behave, how to feel. The furniture had never been ours, it was all new and nothing seemed to bring back any memories. But as soon as I entered Jamie's family ancestral home, I felt something I had never felt before, and it was something hard to define. Even though the house was as big as my parents', if I dared to say it was even bigger, it didn't have any coolness in it. It was always full of people walking the halls, voices and laughter were heard from afar. It was something that embraced you in a way that could not possibly leave a smile on your face and I was there for less than 24 hours.

After the tumultuous lunch, but very funny, Ian invited me to go with him to the distillery and at first, I was a little apprehensive to accept seeing Jamie's disappointed look. I knew it was something he was eager to show me, as well as all the rest of the trip, was one of several tours he had planned. But I also knew that young Ian was head over heels with his uncle there and couldn't wait for the two of them to spend some time together. I accepted the invitation and then would talk to my friend; in the end I knew he would not regret the time next to his nephew.

When we arrived at the distillery, I was surprised again, something very common in this trip. I don't know what image I had formed in my head, but it was nothing that was in front of me, of course Claire, you had no idea what a distillery looked like, obviously it was something unexpected! It wasn't exactly within the Fraser family's land, but Ian explained to me that Brian had bought that land to make his dream come true after the other companies in the family had succeeded, so it wasn't within Lallybroch's boundaries.

The outside was nothing more than a large concrete block, like any commercial establishment. I don't know if because everything in Scotland seemed to have an ancestral architecture, I was expecting something totally different. Ian laughed when he saw the disappointment in my face.

“I ken it's nothing like Lallybroch, but it's inside these walls that the magic happens!”

And he was right. When we entered, after going through the various corridors with normal rooms like every office, we went to the back part of the place and there I could see the big structure where were several oak barrels where were stored the liquid so precious for the Scots. It was there that my tour really happened and I noticed how natural it was to be a born storyteller from all Highlander. Ian began to explain to me the many differences between the types of whiskies produced in the country and which one Fraser distillery had chosen to produce.

There was the single malt, which was the most traditional of all, of course. It had that name because it was produced in a single distillery and only with malted barley, with no other cereals added. They were distilled in copper stills, which Ian made a point of showing me so that I could understand what it was, and then they would stay for years resting in the barrels that were now in front of us. While my private guide was finishing his explanation, an employee appeared with a tray where several glasses of whisky were lined for our tasting.

I learned that there they produced the 12, 15 and 18 years old and it was intriguing to know that something Brian Fraser had started years ago, only now was showing results. Unfortunately he was not there to see what his dream had become, but he knew that Ian and Jenny were giving him a lot of pride with their achievements. He knew I didn't have a great knowledge in drinking whisky and Ian laughed when I coughed non-stop when I knocked down a shot of whisky 18 years old, yeah, I was lucky Jamie wasn't there to make more fun of how bad I was to enjoy his favorite drink.

“It's been a while since I've seen him so happy to be in Lallybroch.” Ian suddenly said the words, taking me by surprise.

“I'm sure it's because of young Ian's birthday, he loves his nephew!” I answered quickly and shy.

“Aye, he loves his nephew, but coming here always brought many memories he always wanted to avoid, at first Jenny insisted for him to always come, that he was losing important moments in family, but after a while I saw in my best friend's face how painful it was for him to see everything his father had built and wasn't here to enjoy along with us. So, I told Jenny to stop forcing him, even more using the family as an excuse...”

I didn't know what to say, Ian was telling me things I knew, at least in parts, about what Jamie had been through, but for him to trust me to vent, that I didn't expect and I was perplexed.

“I knew that he had gone to work with his uncles to escape from here, because if ye knew the Mackenzie brothers, ye would ken right away that Jamie wouldna get along at that job. But I didna say anything, he didna want to stay here with me at the distillery and didna even want to accept the money we send him every month...you ken he has a share here, dinna you? If he wanted, he wouldna even have to work in London, he could just be an inconsequential playboy with that bike that Jenny hates so much, but I think ye've seen that Jamie isn't like that, so we were amazed when he told us that he was working as a delivery lad...”

My look of amazement probably gave to Ian that I knew nothing about what he was talking about. I had only discovered days before that Jamie's family had a distillery and also the reason he had gone to London to work with his uncles, but I had no idea he never needed the job at my flower shop, even though he said he owed the rent to Mrs. McNab when he came to us. Jamie Fraser was a complex man, but more than that, he was totally generous and not proud at all.

He could accept the money that was rightfully his and live the good life that most people want, but no, he always worked and avoided accepting the money his family sent. I knew that Jenny had sent money for the trip and that he spent everything buying things for me! I saw that Ian looked at me intensely while all these thoughts went through my head.

“Anyway, Claire, I told ye all this so that ye would ken that ye and yer flower shop brought a joy to Jamie's life that had been absent for a long time and for this we are grateful, even if Jenny didna show it, she is happy that her brother is here again with a smile on his face.

“I...Ian, you took me by surprise, I didn't know...I don't know if I deserve it...” and there I was stuttering like a fool.

“You dinna have to say anything, I ken ye're not used to the honesty of the Scots even though ye live with Jamie every day.” And then he laughed, making me relax too. “I can only wish ye luck when ye'd be alone with my dear wife, she won't be as kind as me in the interrogation...” and his laugh only got louder when he saw my amazed face. Jamie had already warned me about it and now I was more than sure that I didn't know if I wanted to be alone with Jenny.

And of course, that's what happened when we got back from the distillery. Jamie was still riding with his nephew and Ian wasted no time in running for a shower while leaving me alone with his wife. At first, she just offered me a coffee to soften the shots of whisky I had taken earlier, according to her my face was red and she did not want to see anyone ill. But she had no idea that I was like this for fear of what could happen in the next few minutes. And what happened was nothing what I expected, at least in parts.

“I will tell ye Claire, I was amazed to see that Jamie had brought a guest, even more a woman...”

“Doesn't he usually bring friends to meet Lallybroch?”

“Most of his friends are cousins who already been here a lot, but what really amazed me is that ye are the first, and by the way the only woman he brought to Lallybroch and to meet the family in a moment as intimate as his nephew's birthday...”

While I was still trying to figure out what she had said, we heard young Ian scream "Uncle Jamie" and as we turned around he was hiding behind the door with the tips of his ears red and a half-hearted smile on his face. How much had he heard from the conversation? I saw Jenny smiling satisfied, she seemed to have liked to see that he was hiding listening to everything, wondering if she had planned all that. I was more confused than ever by the intensity of that family, but soon we were distracted by young Ian who began to narrate all the afternoon adventures with his uncle.

“You stink...” I kept my voice down for Jamie when he sat next to me while his nephew talked to his mother non-stop.

“Och Sassenach, ye stay all afternoon without seeing me and that's all ye can say?”

“Like it's not normal to go for a while without seeing each other.”

“Actually, it's not, but I'll forgive yer mean remarks because Ian probably got ye drunk on the distillery tour.”

“Your sister has already made sure to give me a large cup of coffee to avoid any incident...”

“Jenny has always been smart!” I hit him in the arm. “Since I'm being so cherished around here, I'm going to take a shower!”

“No!” I shouted and everyone got scared looking at me confused. “I just wanted to say it's my turn to take a shower, you stay here!”

“Ye ken that we have more than one bathroom in the house, right Sassenach?”

“But I don't want your sister to be alone.”

“Something that despite always dreaming, is impossible to happen when ye have 4 children!” Jenny said it laughing. “Ye can go and take a shower, in a little while Mrs. Crook will serve dinner and if ye take too long ye will have to settle for the leftovers...”

Jamie and I got up soon, I was in a hurry to get out of there before Jenny started asking me more questions, Ian and Jamie had really scared me. My friend didn't seem in such a hurry until I felt his hands on my ass as soon as we started going up the stairs.

“Jamie!” I shouted as he squeezed me.

“Sassenach, do ye ken how hard it is to resist this when ye go up the stairs wiggling in front of me?”

“I'm not wiggling! And someone can see! They already think we're dating, if they see your display of "affection" here they'll not be convinced of our friendship!”

“And ye think I'm worried? My sister is more stubborn than I am, there's no point in talking about it, nothing will convince her otherwise...and it's so hard to enjoy a moment alone with ye around here.”

We were already in front of my room, Jamie's hand seemed to be stuck to my ass and didn't seem to want to leave so soon.

“Come, I have to teach ye how the shower works in yer bathroom.” Jamie spoke pushing me into the room.

“What's so different about it?” I asked staring at him.

“Nothing!” he answered with a naughty smile while locking the bedroom door.

_**POV Jamie**_

Of course we were late for dinner, but that was not my intention when I was going up to our rooms. I wanted to talk to Claire, I wanted to know how the afternoon at the distillery had been and what my sister had talked to her, I still had doubts if what I heard in the kitchen was the only observation made. But of course, seeing Claire going up the stairs in front of me completely distracted me from my initial goal and the conversation would have to wait for later.

Dinner was quieter compared to lunch, everyone was tired, except the children, of course, they had enough energy to leave my sister and Ian with their hair up all day long. We talked a little about what my nephew's party would be like the next day and I was already planning in my head what I would do with Claire to stay as far away from the house as possible. Nobody could stand Jenny on party days! She gives orders to everyone and even following all her instructions, she always finds some flaw. This resulted in a lot of stress and screaming.

After we finished eating, we went to the living room where Ian insisted on showing his last projects to the distillery. He was always concerned to include me in all the ideas and decisions he took for the company, even if I didn't mind. Of course I cared about the legacy that my father had left to us, but I trusted my brother-in-law to take care of everything in the best possible way. While he was explaining some projects that were already underway for the distillery, we tasted some of the last batch of whisky produced and I could not avoid the smile when I felt the taste of that liquid that brought me so many good memories from home.

I saw that Claire was entertained in a conversation with Jenny, which worried me at the same time that it made me happy to see them both getting along so well. I just couldn't predict how long that honeymoon would last, probably until Jenny found out that we wouldn't get married next month like my nephew wanted. My attention was drawn by Ian, who looked at me angry for speaking for a few minutes without me hearing a word. I decided that later I would finally talk to Claire to know what the two talked so much, I'm sure it was not good things of me.

An hour passed and I noticed that my sister and Ian were trying to hide their yawns. Claire seems to have noticed too and started to say good night to everyone, saying that she was tired after the hectic day and would sleep. I also wanted to go up with her, but I ended up fulfilling the request of my older nephews who were still awake and wanted me to put them to sleep, they always liked me to tell some story of London, a totally strange and enchanted place for them.

After two long stories, they finally surrendered to sleep and I did not waste time going to Claire's room. I didn't know if she had already slept, but that time was the only time we would have to talk in peace and let's say I was a curious person, even more after noticing conspiratorial looks between my sister and Ian. I decided not to knock on the door, I didn't want to risk one of the children waking up and telling the whole house that I was entering Claire's room. When I walked in, it was already dark and I whispered "Sassenach," but I didn't get an answer, she was already asleep?

But then I noticed that the bathroom door was closed and a light came from inside. Ok, she was still awake. I decided to sit on the bed to wait, but soon I gave up this idea, I was tired and she was taking a while. I took off my shoes and laid down, she had probably taken another shower or was putting on the thousand lotions she used before bed. I ended up closing my eyes for a few seconds and when I opened them it was because of a weight falling on me.

“Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!” I heard Claire screaming.

“Shiuuu Sassenach, it's just me!” she didn't need to wake up the whole house.

“And why are you lying on my bed and in the dark? It almost gave me a heart attack!”

“Because I wanted to talk to ye, but it seems that ye died in the bathroom and I ended up falling asleep!”

“Turning on the light and telling me you were here never crossed your mind?”

“No! But now that ye ken of my presence and as much as I like ye on top of me, I wanted to talk a little.”

She mumbled something I didn't understand and lay down next to me. I turned on the lamp that was on the bedside table and we lay there for a while looking at each other. I had never seen Claire so relaxed as now, even in the days when we didn't have much work at the flower shop or even on Sunday, she never totally relaxed, she always seemed worried about something.

“Is there something wrong with my face? I'm sure this time I took off my mask before going to sleep!” She said it and I laughed when I remembered the day she scared me with her face all green because of a mask she was wearing before bed.

“Are ye enjoying Lallybroch? Is that all ye expected?” I asked without further ado.

“I'm hating it, it's being a torture to be spoiled by Mrs. Crook who thinks I'm too thin and stuff me with goodies all the time, as well as all the horrible whisky that everybody keeps pushing down my throat. Not to mention your nephews! Terrible children who call me Aunt Claire without at least knowing me properly!” she finished saying with a smile on her face.

“It sounds really horrible Sassenach, I can see it was a bad idea to bring ye here!”

“Really bad! Lallybroch is nothing like I expected... Jamie...” I saw that she took a deep breath and took my hand. “I've never felt more at home than I did this half day I'm here, I don't even know how you could compare me coming here with you having dinner at my parents' house!”

“Hm, ye only spent a few hours next to my sister, she still hasn't had time to show everything she is capable of...or has she?” I asked apprehensively, after all I didn't know what they had talked about.

“Your sister is a saint next to my father! And I don't know why everyone keeps scaring me about it, Ian said the same thing when we talked at the distillery.”

“Because we ken her like nobody else and we're right!”

“She didn't say anything that you didn't hear when you were hiding behind the kitchen door...” she laughed and I could only think about how to kill my dear nephew for that.

“And the visit to the distillery? Was it fun? Because I ken Ian can get carried away in his explanations and be totally uninteresting for those who dinna understand anything about whisky.”

“I found it very interesting and you two are being great guides for my tours around Scotland!”

“I think I'm a little more interesting than Ian...”

“Jealous? Jamie Fraser, don't worry, you will always be number 1 to me! After Hugh Jackman, of course.” I just rolled my eyes while she laughed.

“Aside from all the explanation about the whisky, did Ian say anything else? About me?”

“Hmm, I think someone is curious and totally insecure...have you been up to something Fraser?”

“Of course not! But I ken how my brother-in-law likes to talk, he may not be as direct as Jenny, but he always speaks his mind in a kind way that we dinna even realize we are taking some moral lesson.”

At that moment I saw that she got a little nervous and I knew that it had happened exactly what I said.

“Claire?” I used her name to let her know that I wasn't kidding. “What did he say to ye?” Her hand, which was still holding mine, squeezed a little more and I knew she was trying to create courage to speak.

“Nothing for you to worry about...only, Jamie, why didn't you ever tell me you didn't need the job at the flower shop?” Of course, I knew he would tell her about that.

“I dinna like to depend on someone, much less on my sister.” I said more seriously and dryly than I needed, but this subject always left me like this.

“I know you don't like it.” She said it while she was running her finger over my arm, almost making a drawing to calm me down. “But you could go after a job in your area, something that would bring some accomplishment...”

“But I am already accomplished.” I said it interrupting. “Sassenach.” I took a deep breath before continuing. “I ken it can seem crazy to everybody, me, an heir of a successful company, being working as a delivery guy in a small flower shop. But to be honest, I never felt comfortable with all this money that suddenly fell into my lap. My father always taught us the value of hard and honest work, I dinna think it's right to go around spending money while my sister and Ian stay here doing everything to support the family. And I've never felt happier and more relaxed than these last months working with ye Sassenach. Working with my uncles was stressful and I ken that there in the flower shop, even doing little, I ken I'm helping two people who put everything they had to make a dream come true.”

“Jamie Fraser, I hate you!” She said it laughing a little, but I saw that her eyes were full of tears that were fighting to not fall. “I keep asking myself what I did to deserve someone like you in my life! You seem to have come out of a damn book! I came here thinking I would help you the same way you helped me when you went with me to my parents' house, but here we are again with me learning how wonderful you and your family are.”

“Sassenach...ye ken that I'm not all that ye talk about, much less my family. We are not perfect, but when we like and care about a person, we try to welcome them in all ways. And that is what we are doing with ye. It may not seem like it, but I really like ye Claire.” She laughed as she came closer to me, hugging me.

“I like you too Jamie, but it may be that your nephew Ian is gaining a more special place in my heart...”

I laughed, but I tightened our hug. She now had her head resting on my chest and a silence took over the room. But it was not uncomfortable at all, on the contrary, it was so good that I ended up closing my eyes and falling asleep. I woke up scared with the sun hitting my face, Claire had not closed the curtains and this only made me confirm that I had spent the night in the room with her. I tried to move my arm, but it was numb, we were still hugging and Claire's weight had left it numb.

I could already hear the movement in the hallways of the house, probably the children were already awake. Even though I didn't want to, I needed to get out of there right away, I didn't want to give my sister any more proof that she was right about Claire not just being a friend. Speaking of her, I tried to move without waking her, but of course I couldn't because my arm was totally immobile under her body.

“Jamie?” she murmured sleepily as she felt me moving. “Jamie!” now she had almost screamed. “It's already morning, and you're here!”

“Really? I hadn't even noticed the sun hitting my face!”

“Idiot!” was always her greatest compliment to me. “You have to leave here soon, if your sister sees, she will fill us with questions!”

“Hey, weren't ye the one who wasn't afraid of Jenny anymore?” I asked as I picked up my shoes that was thrown near the bed.

“But that doesn't stop me from not liking her interrogation first thing in the morning!”

I gave up looking like I hadn't just woken up, the sooner I got out of there the better. I opened the door as quietly as possible and did the same by closing it after I left. When I turned to go to my room I ran into my nephew Ian, that seeing me barefoot and holding my shoes in my hand, widened his eyes and said.

“Uncle Jamie! Did ye sleep in the bedroom with Aunt Claire?” Great, once again he announced loud and clear what I was doing.

“Shhhh Ian...” I tried to silence him, but it was too late, at the end of the hall Jenny appeared with arms crossed and an ironic smile on her face.


	17. Chapter 17

_**POV Claire** _

I listened to Jamie's nephew's voice and knew that we wouldn't be able to escape any inquisition before leaving Lallybroch. I ended up laughing, after all Jamie had only slept in my room, we hadn't done anything they were probably imagining, well, at least not that night. Involuntarily my face got hot remembering what we had done the day before in the bathroom. I'm glad that house had thick walls!

Before getting ready to face the curious looks of the Fraser-Murray family, I went to check my cell phone. I had completely forgotten about that device since we started this trip to Scotland. In fact, I had forgotten everything about London, it seemed like I was on vacation for a long time, without even remembering what I was doing with my life! But a message from Mary brought me back to reality more than quickly. There was nothing alarming about our shop, just the weekly balance sheet, but what made me worry was that she said Geillis had gone there desperately thinking something had happened to me, because I didn't answer her messages and her thousand messages left in my voice mail.

Of course, Mary could not hide any details from my curious friend and told everything about my trip with Jamie, which only made Geillis even more curious and made several jokes that Mary had the decency to ignore and not tell me. Great, now she would annoy me even more about having something more than friendship with Jamie. I desperately needed to teach my dear partner that she could lie when it was convenient, even more when it was convenient for me!

The voices in the hall made me go back to my current reality. If I didn't get ready for breakfast right away, I was sure that one of the kids would break into my room without any embarrassment to call me. I had already learned in that short time that that family didn't know much about privacy. Or was my family the complete opposite of the Frasers? And as if they guessed what I was thinking, while I finished putting on my blouse, the door to my room was opened at once by Maggie and Kitty who were excited to finally have a younger "aunt" to play with them.

When I arrived in the kitchen, Jamie was already there drinking coffee and talking with Ian as if nothing had happened. I decided I would do the same and sat down next to the girls who insisted that they wanted to braid my hair. The conversation between the three of us remained neutral, we were discussing what Jenny wanted to do for young Ian's birthday later. He was so anxious, by the way, that he wouldn't stop running around the house, wondering what time his party would start and when his friends would arrive.

To calm his nephew down a bit, Jamie decided to take him to the stable where he had prepared a small surprise. Since we went by motorcycle to Lallybroch, it was a little difficult to bring gifts to Ian, so Jamie arranged with one of his several cousins who had store in Edinburgh to take what his nephew so much desired. A new and imposing saddle for his little horse! When he saw what his uncle had prepared, we heard his cries of happiness from afar. I laughed when I saw him jump to reach Jamie in a tight hug, but what I didn't expect was for him to run in my direction seconds later and hug me tight too: "Thanks Aunt Claire!"

I looked at Jamie and he had a proud smile on his face. I knew my face was flushed because I felt my cheeks burn, but more than that, I felt tears fighting to not fall from my eyes. I knew the gift Jamie would give, but I never thought young Ian would include me in his thank-you hug, after all we barely knew each other and I had done nothing special for him until then.

“Let's go for a ride to try out yer gift?” Jamie said calling his nephew's attention. “But it will be quick because then I want to take Aunt Claire to meet Lallybroch.” And he smiled at me.

Ian didn't think twice and ran to his horse and with his uncle's help he was soon making little trips around the property. Jamie watched him closely while riding his horse, a giant creature close to the others. As the two of them rode nearby and laughed at something I didn't know what it was, I was amazed to see how easy Jamie was with the animals. The day he had taken me to the stable in London, I could see some of it, but there, in Lallybroch, he seemed more at ease than ever. And his face reflected it.

I kept watching them from a distance, trying to give them a little privacy because I felt I was invading a family moment. But I could feel Jamie's eyes always in my direction, even while he was talking to his nephew. I threatened to go back to the house so he wouldn't worry about me, but when I started walking, I heard him calling me.

“Sassenach! Dinna think ye'll run away from riding, I ken ye're afraid, but Donas seemed to like ye!” He said it and bent down affectionately on his horse, as if he wanted to prepare him for my presence.

The two of them came back minutes later and I knew I couldn't escape. Not that that's what I was doing, I just wanted to give a little privacy to Jamie, but I should have learned by now that my good intentions were no use. Young Ian quickly got off his horse and giving his uncle a clumsy wink, ran towards the house without saying anything. I looked at Jamie confused and he just shrugged his shoulders, laughing a little while he got down from Donas and took his nephew's horse back to the stables. 

“I thought maybe I could borrow Ian's horse, at least this one I'm sure I won't fall, and if I fall, the tumble won't be so bad.” I told him when I saw that Jamie had already taken off his nephew's horse's new saddle.

“He couldna bear yer weight Sassenach!” he said laughing.

“Idiot!” I hit his arm.

“Dinna fash, as much as I dinna seem to care about yer safety sometimes, I won't be crazy to leave ye alone on a horse. Ye go with me on Donas, we won't ride much, after all ye're not used to it and I want ye to still have use of yer legs later...” and tried to wink, but as always, it looked like a big owl. Cute.

I rolled my eyes in response and waited for him to help me ride Donas. I was afraid of that horse, he had a very black coat, as well as eyes that seemed to face me in a not very friendly way. But in the end, he seemed to obey his master's orders with tranquility. Jamie was right, I wasn't used to ride a horse and it wasn't the most comfortable thing with me. The landscape of the Frasers' property helped to distract the little bother I felt, as well as to support my back on Jamie's chest. He ended up passing his arms around me, not only to keep me safe, but also to control his not so small horse and the direction he was driving us.

I had no idea the size of the land that belonged to them, it seemed we were already miles away from the stables and Jamie didn't seem to find the end of the ride. I ended up knowing where the dairy products and wool they sold to most of the region were made. Of course, I wouldn't miss the opportunity to try some of the products that were fresh. Jamie's smile didn't seem to leave his face that morning and the stories of his childhood were told with pride.

Another stop on our tour was the old mill on the property. That's where it all started when Brian was just a young newlywed and full of dreams. I saw in Jamie's eyes how he admired his father and everything he had conquered, and even though he was no longer there to see it, his children made sure to tell everyone about his legacy. While Jamie was showing me how they used to turn grain into flour, a different plant caught my attention. It was near the mill and was full of yellow flowers, flowers I had never seen before.

“Ah, ye found my mother's plant...it's Gorse, it can endure the rigorous winter we have here and now it blooms. The thorns are to protect from insects and attacks from other animals. My mother planted it because the essence of this flower is known to give a cheerfulness to people who have given up everything, who think there is nothing more to be done in their lives...she thought it would be perfect to have here, the place where my father started what would be the destiny of their lives.”

I stood there for a few minutes trying to absorb all the information that Jamie had given me. As always, he surprised me, I didn't imagine he had any knowledge about plants and flowers. But the meaning and the beauty of that flower called me more attention than all the rest.

“”My mother liked plants too Sassenach, not like ye, but she had a small garden where she spent hours of her day...sometimes I stayed with her, when I was grounded for having done something and my father thought that staying there could bring me some responsibility. I ended up learning a few things in the hours that I gave up complaining about being there and not playing.” He laughed, making me laugh as well as imagining a grumpy Jamie having to listen about plants and flowers while he could be playing or riding.

“And you fooled me all this time when you were asking for help at the flower shop?”

“Sassenach, ye never asked me for help.” Yeah, that was true, I had a little difficulty in assuming that I couldn't handle everything by myself. “But we can continue like this, I dinna want ye fighting with me because I did something wrong with yer "daughters". I only rolled my eyes in response.

“Jamie...Can I...”

“Take a flower with ye?” he completed my sentence. Ugh, how did he know me so well? I nodded my head. - Sure, but I'll help you because these thorns can cause some kind of accident and I know you're not as handy as you look. - He laughed while I showed him my tongue.

I kept the flower the best way I could in the pocket of my blouse and Jamie said it was better to go back before Jenny went after us. Ian's party would be late afternoon after all it was a children's party, and we would probably be assigned to help clean up after lunch. By the time we got to the stables, we could see the kids running around with balloons and screams coming from inside the house. Yeah, that day would be interesting to say the least.

And as planned, after lunch Jenny called me to help her organize the table where the children would do various outdoor activities in the backyard of that huge house. Mrs. Crook had almost all the food ready and the men in the house were clever enough to say that they would help take care of the children while we arranged everything. What did they do? They watched rugby on TV while the children almost knocked down the rooms with their toys.

The party ended up coming faster than we imagined and the next thing I knew, I found myself surrounded by children and adults I had never seen in my life. Jamie had disappeared from my sight as soon as the first guests arrived and now that we were saying goodbye to the first people, I saw him with a group of men who, according to Jenny, were Brian's friends and were amazed to see Jamie after so long. I could feel in Jenny's speech a slight irony when talking about her brother's absence at the last family parties, but I preferred to ignore and continue with the help of taking the empty glasses to the kitchen.

While throwing some disposable plates in the trash, I heard voices a little altered coming towards me and by a reflex, I ended up hiding in the kitchen hallway to the living room. I soon saw it was Jamie and Jenny, they were having everything but a nice conversation. I knew it wasn't right for me to stand there listening, but my feet couldn't move and it felt like my body was showing me that I was more curious than I thought I was.

“Did ye really need to go work as a delivery boy? I ken that Claire is an attractive woman and ye can't stay away from her, but ye didna need this job!”

“Me working in the flower shop has nothing to do with Claire being attractive! I needed money and she needed help!”

“Ye didna need money, my dear brother, I was sending ye yer check every month!”

“That I told you I didna want! I need to feel useful, I need to work!”

“Ye could be useful in something that wouldna throw away the diploma that our father fought so hard for ye to have!”

“Dinna talk about our father! He has nothing to do with it!” Jamie was now screaming like I had never seen before.

“How could he not? Ye went to London because ye couldna stay here and face yer responsibilities! Then ye buy a motorcycle that's not only dangerous, but has cost ye all yer savings! And ye decide that going to work as a delivery boy would be the answer to all yer problems!”

I heard a noise of a glass breaking and I knew it was time to leave there. But I also knew that that night Jamie would need me the same way I needed him when my father was as tough as his sister was being.

_**POV Jamie** _

After my nephew announced to the whole house that I had slept in Claire's room, I decided to ignore the curious looks I was getting and continue the day as if nothing had happened. But I knew that my sister wouldn't let it pass so easily, but I also knew that she wouldn't talk to me in front of everyone. As much as the family was already used to our fights and discussions, some subjects I knew she liked to approach when we were alone, especially because she could make a bigger pressure without external factors interfering.

Even though it was Ian's birthday party day, I had already planned to take Claire to get to know a bit of Lallybroch, after all we would leave the next day and she had spent more time with the kids than having fun with me. Not that this was a bad thing, but as a best friend I could be a little selfish from time to time and demand a little attention. Of course I had some fun with her fear of riding, but in the end everything was better than I expected, we spent the whole morning talking about my good childhood memories and ended up sharing the little knowledge I had about flowers. This impressed her a little and I could not hide the pride I felt in being more useful to my Sassenach.

When we returned home, time passed in a matter of seconds. Claire was soon assigned to help my sister with the decoration and other party stuff while Ian and I, already knowing very well how Lallybroch party days worked, pretended we were taking care of the kids so we could watch the rugby game in peace. A few shots of whisky were also very well appreciated at that time. The party started in the middle of the afternoon and the house was packed quickly. Children running all around and people I hadn't seen in ages kept me away from Claire all the time.

But I was not worried, she was a person who adapted easily in any situation and had no problem in meeting new people. When the first guests started to leave, I noticed my sister's look on me, but I preferred to ignore and continue the conversation with some of my father's friends. The problem was that I couldn't run away for long, soon the house was practically empty and the next thing I knew, Jenny was beside me, pretending to collect some glasses to start a conversation I didn't want to have.

“I thought I'd spend the whole party with Claire, but by the way ye just like to sneak into her room during the night...” Of course she would say something about what she saw this morning.

“We dinna need to hide, I just went to Claire's room to talk, I ended up sleeping there because I was very tired.”

“And why were ye so scared when Ian found ye leaving there?”

“Because I knew that ye would understand everything wrong and I was not in the mood to have this conversation that we are having now…”

“Ye didna want to because ye ken ye have something besides friendship between ye two...I dinna ken why ye want to hide it, it's all in yer face!”

“Only if it's on yer face Jenny! We are best friends and this leads us to have more intimacy with each other...” 

“Did ye do all this to win her over? Did ye really have to go to work as a delivery boy? I ken that Claire is an attractive woman and ye can't stay away from her, but ye didn't need this job!” that's it! Now the conversation had gotten where she wanted it to.

“Me working in the flower shop has nothing to do with Claire being attractive! I needed money and she needed help!”

“Ye didna need money, my dear brother, I was sending ye yer check every month!”

“That I told ye I didna want! I need to feel useful, I need to work!”

“Ye could be useful in something that wouldna throw away the diploma that our father fought so hard for ye to have!”

“Dinna talk about our father! He has nothing to do with it!” I knew I was yelling, but I was like this every time my sister insisted on putting our father in our discussions.

“How could he not? Ye went to London because ye couldna stay here and face yer responsibilities! Then ye buy a motorcycle that's not only dangerous, but has cost ye all yer savings! And ye decide that going to work as a delivery boy would be the answer to all yer problems!”

I had reached my limit, I didn't like to remember everything that had happened and the reasons that led me to live in London. But my sister had never accepted the way I dealt with grief, with my father's absence. I knew she couldn't leave Lallybroch, that she didn't have the same option as me, but I also knew that she and Ian always liked living there, that they would hardly leave everything for a life in the big city. But she resented not having a choice and always blamed me for having left her "alone" to deal with everything. I was nervous, hurt and I didn't think about hitting the kitchen table hard, the place where we ended up during the discussion. The glasses that Jenny had just put there, ended up going to the floor and the noise of glass breaking silenced our conversation.

At the same time I heard a noise coming from the door leading to the hall of the house, someone was there listening to our discussion and I knew it could only be Claire. She probably hid when she saw us coming in, not wanting to disturb us. Something that someone else in the family would never do, they usually interfered so that our argument would not get where it had gotten to.

“I always faced my responsibilities Janet! When ye stop looking only at yourself, ask our uncles why I left the company, who kens then ye will see that I am not the spoiled brother who doesn't give a damn about family and business! Now if ye'll excuse me, I'm going to sleep! And in whatever room I want!”

She looked at me in a crossed way while picking up the pieces of glass on the floor. I knew I had provoked her too, but at that moment I didn't care about anything anymore. I never wanted to tell what happened with our dear uncles and much less that way, but I had reached my limit and the shots of whisky I had during the party did not help in my emotional control. While walking to the room, I ran into Ian who just nodded, showing that he knew what had happened and that everything was fine.

I already knew I wouldn't sleep in my room that night, I needed Claire, I needed company to calm me down, being alone wasn't even close to my desire for that long night. Without bothering to warn of my presence, I entered her room at once and of course I scared her, making her jump out of bed.

“Jamie!” she exclaimed when she saw me. “Is everything all right?" she asked as she sat on the bed, making room for me beside her.

“Ye ken it isn't Sassenach, I ken ye heard me arguing with Jenny.” I said it while I was getting rid of my clothes, just staying in my underwear and lying next to her.

“Did you hear? How? Jamie? What are you doing? They're gonna know you're sleeping here...”

“And do ye think I care? Sassenach, I need ye today...” and I laid my head on her lap, pulling her hand to caress me. Somebody stroking my hair always calmed me down. “I told ye, ye're not as quiet as ye think, aye? I heard a noise in the hall and I knew it was ye.”

“Yeah, I need to learn from you how to get to the places without being noticed...but I didn't want to stay there listening, I didn't know what to do, I...” she was stuttering and stroking my hair harder.

“Sassenach! I just dinna want ye to feel guilty about the things my sister said, she was just trying to provoke me and of course she succeeded.”

“Jamie, I would never feel like this, I understand how these family provocations work and you know very well, you were there when my father told me the most absurd things...”

“Aye...family can be our most precious asset, but also our biggest pain in the ass...” she laughed when she heard me say that.

“Definitely! But we know that we are always looking for their approval, even when we know that we don't have to prove anything...Jamie, I know we haven't known each other that long, but I know how responsible you are with your life and especially with your family, with the people you love. You managed to prevent your uncles from buying your share in the family business, is that running away from responsibilities? I think you should tell your sister, she needs to know that you don't just ride your motorcycle up and down delivering flowers... “ her voice was getting more altered, she was probably feeling a little bit of the frustration that I had felt minutes before.

“But I told her...after ye left, I told her that she should ask my uncles why I left their company. Of course, I didna explain everything, but I ken she won't forget this, her curiosity is bigger than her pride.”

I looked at her laughing a little and she reciprocated with an even bigger smile. We stayed a few minutes just looking at each other, she was caressing me while I ran my hands over her legs which were showing because of the little nightgown she was wearing. My heart was calming its beats as time went by and I started to feel so good, so safe and complete right there on Claire's lap. I couldn't explain what she was doing to me, but it was something I had never felt before and for now I was happy to know just that.

I saw her cell phone vibrating over the bedside table and it caught my attention. Without asking her, I took it in my hand and ignored the messages that were coming. I saw that her Spotify was open and without even seeing which was the playlist that was playing, I pressed play and a calm music began to take over the room. I got up from her lap and put the cell phone where it was before, with this I stood in front of Claire and opening my legs, I pulled her close to me. She responded by putting her legs around my body and so we were "attached".

We stared at each other for a moment, our faces glued together as the lyrics of the song dominated all the space and entered my head making all the sense of the world _: "I've known it from the moment that we met, No doubt in my mind where you belong..."_. As if everything were in slow motion, our mouths were slowly approaching, but not because we were apprehensive but to savor a moment we had never had before. Her lips touched mine and soon gave way for me to invade her with my tongue, savoring her slowly and intensely.

_*please, listen to this song while reading the rest of the chapter:_ <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlXodzoQG4U>

I moved away from her mouth just to get her nightgown off, soon kissing her again with all the attention she deserved. Little by little I laid her on the bed, touching her softly and kissing her neck and collar. The sighs and shivers that I was causing made me lift my head and our gazes crossed. A light smile came over my face when I saw her whisky-colored eyes looking at me with an admiration and emotion that I had never seen so intensely, that made my breath stop for a few seconds.

I felt her trembling hands trying to take off the only piece of clothing I was still wearing and I helped her quickly. I turned my attention to her body, kissing her legs while my hands went to the tiny panties she was wearing, slowly pulling it down, soon having the same fate as her nightgown. Now Claire was there, the way I wanted her that night, totally committed to me and I wanted to show that I was in the same way, nothing else mattered, I wanted her to feel, I needed to be with her, in her.

With a control that I didn't know I had, I opened her legs and positioned myself between them. Without taking my eyes off Claire's face, I slowly invaded her and a wave of pleasure took over my body, I was finally where I belonged, where my place was. I was home.

**_“I could make you happy_ ** **_  
Make your dreams come true  
Nothing that I wouldn't do  
Go to the ends  
Of the Earth for you  
To make you feel my love”_ **


	18. Chapter 18

_**POV Claire** _

I never thought I could walk so fast, but after I heard the noise of a glass breaking in the kitchen in the middle of Jamie's argument with his sister, I went to my room in record time. When I arrived, I didn't know why I was nervous, but my breathing was altered and on an impulse I quickly took off the clothes I was wearing and put on my nightgown. I didn't know why I wanted to show that I was ready for bed and not listening to conversation that was not of my interest.

I had barely laid in bed when the bedroom door opened abruptly and I already knew who it was, but I got scared the same way:

“Jamie!” I exclaimed when I saw him. “Is everything okay?” I asked sitting on the bed, I already knew that he was not well, even though I still could not see his features clearly.

“You ken it isn't Sassenach, I ken ye heard me arguing with Jenny.” Did he? He really had super powers of hearing, but when I questioned him, I saw that he was taking off his clothes and without asking any permission, he lay down beside me.

“Did you hear? How? Jamie? What are you doing? They're gonna know you're sleeping here…”

“And do ye think I care? Sassenach, I need ye today...” and he laid his head on my lap, pulling my hand to caress him. It was funny to see a man that size looking like a baby in my care. “I told ye, ye're not as quiet as ye think, aye? I heard a noise in the hall and I knew it was ye.”

“Yeah, I need to learn from you how to get to the places without being noticed...but I didn't want to stay there listening, I didn't know what to do, I...” and there I was stuttering, I didn't want him to think that I was a curious person, that I got in where I wasn't called.

“Sassenach! I just dinna want ye to feel guilty about the things my sister said, she was just trying to provoke me and of course she succeeded.”

“Jamie, I would never feel like this, I understand how these family provocations work and you know very well, you were there when my father told me the most absurd things...”

“Aye...family can be our most precious asset, but also our biggest pain in the ass...” I laughed when I heard him say that.

“Definitely! But we know that we are always looking for their approval, even when we know that we don't have to prove anything...Jamie, I know we haven't known each other that long, but I know how responsible you are with your life and especially with your family, with the people you love. You managed to prevent your uncles from buying your share in the family business, is that running away from responsibilities? I think you should tell your sister, she needs to know that you don't just ride your motorcycle up and down delivering flowers...” I was getting nervous, I didn't know how anyone could think Jamie was an irresponsible person! Even more so someone who knew him as well as Jenny.

“But I told her...after ye left, I told her that she should ask my uncles why I left their company. Of course, I didna explain everything, but I ken she won't forget this, her curiosity is bigger than her pride.”

He laughed a little after confessing what he had done and I couldn't hide my smile. The next few minutes were silent, but I was not uncomfortable at all. I passed my hands through his hair while he made invisible drawings on my legs with his hands and was so good that I could spend the rest of the night like that. I noticed my cell phone vibrating over the bedside table, but before I made any movement to catch him, Jamie did it before and without asking or saying anything, put to play a song that when it started I already knew very well which one it was. That was the playlist I used to relax, to think about life and have good dreams. Everything I wanted that night.

What I didn't expect was to happen everything that happened in the next moment. Jamie sat facing me, pulling me close to him until we were locked into each other. And that's when I came across that pair of blue eyes staring at me deeply. I always admired Jamie's eyes, not only for the most beautiful tone of blue I had ever seen, but for all the emotion he could show. It was easy to know what he was feeling, he never hid anything from me when we faced each other like that, but that night I felt a chill through my body when I saw the intensity they carried, intensity I had never seen before.

Our movements were slow and synchronized. Our kisses, our caresses, the way he took off my nightgown...everything carried an emotion that was making my heart beat in a way that I thought would come out through my mouth. I couldn't stop facing him, I couldn't stop shaking, I couldn't stop...feeling...feeling a whirlwind of emotions that I had never felt for anyone. I was scared, but as I felt that pair of blue eyes again staring at me with an incomparable admiration, the beats of my heart calmed down, and as I felt Jamie inside me, all I could think about was how good it all was, how right it was, and how happy I was. I slept with a smile on my face, wrapped in strong arms that made me feel that I finally belonged somewhere, that I was not alone.

The next day I woke up feeling the first rays of sun that morning. Of course, once again I had forgotten to close the curtains, but it wasn't so bad, we would have to wake up early anyway to hit the road. Long hours on the road were waiting for us, but at that moment I wasn't thinking about all the discomfort I would feel, because the bed was more attractive than ever. I smiled as I saw Jamie's hand on my breast, as if it was always his place. Looking like he knew I was awake, he squeezed me stronger in his arms and I could feel how happy he was to be there.

“Jamie...” I called him because I knew he was awake.

“Hmm” was my answer. His voice was still hoarse, but his hands were wide awake, exploring my body very well.

“We need to get up, pack up... we still have more than nine hours on the road.” I said as I tried to get his hand out of my ass.

“Sassenach...” he spoke in a tone that sounded like a spoiled child. “You ken how to ruin a moment...” 

“What moment Jamie?” I tried to laugh and joke about what he was talking about, but my head was still confused by everything that had happened the night before.

“Wow! Am I so bad at showing my intentions to ye?”

When he said that, I turned quickly to face him, my eyes probably wide open. What intentions? I really wasn't understanding what he wanted.

“After that look in yer eyes I got scared! Sassenach, I just wanted to enjoy a few more minutes of this...” and he stood over my body, holding my arms above my head, making any movement impossible while kissing me.

But before he could continue, we heard knocks on the door and Ian's shy voice calling out for Jamie. Great! He already knew we had spent the night together! Now how would I face everyone before I left Lallybroch? But Jamie didn't seem to care for his brother-in-law's insistent call and continued his attention on my body. The knocks on the door continued, now more insistent, accompanied by a request for urgent conversation about the business that needed to be done before we left.

“Fuck Ian! Talk about business now? Ye two have managed to ruin the moment right now!” he spoke as he got off me, but not before biting me.

“Hey!” I yelled, he had bitten hard. “I didn't ruin any moment, I was just a helpless victim of your attacks.”

“Very helpless!” he murmured while looking for his clothes on the bedroom floor.

He dressed fast and shouted to Ian that he was already going. I stood there in bed not knowing what to do next, in fact I knew what I had to do, but seeing Jamie standing there in front of me with a smile on his face reminded me of the intensity of the previous night and how everything seemed to have changed between us. But had it really changed? What were we to each other now? I didn't know anymore if a simple friendship fits our feelings. Jamie pulled me out of my thoughts with a kiss on my forehead and a smile:

“While I'm talking to Ian, ye can pack yer backpack and then I'll finish putting my stuff in!” And without further ado, he left the room leaving me sitting there processing all this information.

I knew it was no use standing there trying to understand everything that was happening between us. It would probably be a conversation we would have to have in London, away from the enchantments of Lallybroch. After taking a quick shower and putting on comfortable clothes to travel, I started to organize the few things that were outside the backpack in that quick stay. I finished doing everything I needed quickly and when I was ready to leave the room, I couldn't help but overhear Ian and Jamie's voices in the hall.

“Now that we've talked about business...ye and Claire huh? And I was trying to make Jenny believe that ye were just friends!” Ian said it laughing.

“But we are just friends!” Jamie answered quickly.

“Friends? Jamie, ye spent the night in her room and dinna tell me ye only slept there!”

I heard a grumbling from Jamie and Ian spoke again.

“Aye, Jenny told me about the other day. And ye ken the walls here look thick, but they're not soundproof!” Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ! How embarrassing!

“I already said Ian! We're just friends! But who said friends can't have benefits?” and I heard them both laugh.

Well, then I didn't have to think about everything I thought had changed between us anymore. For Jamie clearly we were just sticking to our agreement! Of course we were! Why would it be anything different? Me and the habit of romanticizing things! Romantize? Claire, it's Jamie! Your best friend and that's it. That's it. With this in my head I opened the door with determination, scaring them both and making the laughter stop.

“I've packed my things!” I spoke throwing the backpack at Jamie's feet. “I'm going to have a coffee and wait for you in the kitchen so we can leave!”

I saw Jamie's confused look, but I didn't stay there to wait for him to say something. I turned my back and went downstairs without looking back, but I couldn't help but overhear Ian questioning Jamie if he hadn't been efficient the night before. I didn't wait to hear my "friend's" answer.

_**POV Jamie** _

I woke up feeling Claire's body clinging to mine and I couldn't help smiling. My night had been great, even with the discussion I had with Jenny, nothing had prepared me for what I would feel afterwards. Claire gave me the comfort and attention I needed and now I was feeling the luckiest person in the world for having her there in my arms. She really knew how to make me feel good.

I knew we had the whole day ahead of us and it wouldn't be easy, but I wasn't in a hurry to get out of that bed, I wanted to enjoy all the minutes I had there in that bubble we were in. But this did not seem to be Claire's idea and much less Ian who made sure to interrupt a very important moment for me and to talk about something that I had zero interest, at least at that time. With an immense difficulty, I left the room, but not before smiling once again to Claire who was sitting on the bed totally naked and stuck in her thoughts. She was really beautiful.

But all that joy and complicity we were feeling for each other changed in a matter of minutes. While talking to Ian in the hall, we heard Claire's bedroom door open violently and that made us stop talking. Why was she so serious? That face that had shown such joy when I woke up was now closed and her gaze looked like she wanted to kill me:

“I've packed my things!” she spoke throwing the backpack at my feet “I'm going to have a coffee and wait for you in the kitchen so we can leave!”

I tried to say something, but she didn't give me time. Ian was laughing and wondering if the night had been so good because it wasn't what it seemed. She probably just needed a cup of coffee, she was always in a bad mood without her shot of caffeine and I knew she wasn't excited to spend several hours on the bike. On the way to Lallybroch, we were anxious and the trip passed by that we didn't even see, but now it was different, we weren't that excited to return to the reality of London.

I decided to take the backpack that was thrown on the floor and finish packing my things, would give a time for coffee to take effect in Claire. In the end I didn't even have much to pack, I had taken a few clothes and most would leave it right there. This way the backpack would be lighter and would relieve the weight Claire would carry on her back. Now I had no more way to run, I would have to go down and face the two women of my life who by what I had seen, were not happy with me.

When I arrived in the kitchen, silence took over the place and the tension was palpable. Claire sat at one end of the table with her head down and focused on her coffee cup, and on the opposite side was Jenny who faced the emptiness with a serious look and showed that she was not willing to talk much. Great! That's all I wanted before I left. I don't think it was a good idea to have told Claire everything I had discussed with my sister, but she had listened, I couldn't hide it.

The best thing to do at the moment was to take my coffee as soon as possible and leave. My sister would be fine, she just needed time to swallow her pride and apologize to me. Ian would also help with that, I was sure. And Claire? Well, I think staying away from Lallybroch could give her some air, I knew my family was intense and not everyone could handle it well.

My nephews were the only ones who were making any noise in that house before we left. They hugged me and didn't want to let me go back to London. They did the same with Aunt Claire and it was the only moment I saw her smiling and saying more than just "yes" or "no". Yeah, I guess the problem was just with me! Or with Jenny? I was not understanding anything anymore, I did not know if they had exchanged any words before I arrived in the kitchen, but after questioning Claire and receiving a resounding "no" as an answer, I decided not to insist anymore and go get my bike soon.

The first hours of travelling seemed to last an eternity, the landscape did not attract my attention, Claire's hands on my waist were loose, as if she did not want to be there holding me and was a mere obligation. We were almost at the frontier with England when I decided to stop, I needed to stretch my legs a little and try to find out what the hell was going on with Claire! Not that traveling by motorcycle allowed much conversation between us, but the trip had been so pleasant and now was looking like torture.

“Sassenach...” I called her when I took off my helmet and saw that she did not make any effort to look at me. “Is everything okay?”

“Why wouldn't it be?” she spoke harshly, but at least it had been more than just a yes or no.

“Because ye're not talking to me and ye look serious since breakfast at Lallybroch.”

“It's a little hard to talk while we're riding a motorcycle. And I'm just tired Jamie, I want to go back to London soon, I have a lot of things to do in the shop!”

Her features were showing a real fatigue, but there was something else there. Claire never could hide what she was feeling from me, her face always showed everything. But I didn't want to pressure her, to make her nervous, not when we still had at least four hours traveling.

“I was thinking about eating something now so we dinna need to stop until London if ye're in such a hurry...”

“Great!” she cut me off and walked to the little store.

And in an uncomfortable silence, we ate something light to continue our journey. Now I was in the same hurry as her to get to London, I was not understanding what was happening between us and what had gone wrong! Until hours ago we were laughing and hugging each other. Now she seemed to be repulsed by my touch and my presence bothered her. Well, if she wasn't happy to be by my side, I would try to put an end to this anguish soon. I knew I had no right to be angry either, but I didn't like to be that way with her and be treated with disdain without knowing what I had done wrong.

I went at the speed limit of the highway, I wasn't worried anymore if Claire was afraid. I wanted to get home soon and that's what I did. In three hours, we were entering the city and my heart was racing. What would I do now? It was late afternoon and we were both exhausted, but I could not leave everything like that, I needed to know what had happened. When we arrived in front of the flower shop, we got off the bike and I was already taking Claire's backpack to help her when she stopped me.

“You can take the backpack with you, later I'll get my things.” She said quietly while giving me back my helmet.

“But I dinna have much in here, we can go up and take yer things, then I'll take...”

“Jamie.” she spoke seriously, interrupting me. “I think you better go to your house, we are tired, tomorrow I have to open the shop and make up for the lost time on this trip. If we need to make any deliveries, we'll call you.”

“Sassenach, ye ken I dinna mind coming here even without deliveries, I can help ye with something.”

“No need! You can rest, after all I'm the one who has to work!”

“Ye dinna have to do everything by yourself and I dinna need to rest.”

“Jamie! Stay at home, enjoy! And we're friends, we weren't born stuck together!” she said it trying to give a half smile, but it hadn't worked. Something was wrong there.

“Are ye sure everything is okay?” I insisted again because I knew it wasn't.

“I already said it was! I just want to take some time off from you!” And once again the unhappy smile appeared on her face.

“Fine, since ye insist! But ye can call me if ye need anything!”

She just nodded her head and turned to get up to her little apartment without even saying goodbye to me. I took a deep breath, put my backpack on my back and went to my house. Of course, getting there, I did everything but rest. I was restless, anxious and a few more things I could not name. I tried to talk to Claire, sent some messages making jokes about a series we used to watch Sunday night together, but she did not answer me.

She could really be just tired, sick of my company and wanted some time alone. We had never spent so much time together, slept together and everything, but I wasn't tired of her, why would she be of me? Jamie, stop being paranoid, you know you can be intense and overwhelm others, your sister already said that! Speaking of my sister, I knew I had to question Jenny, to know if she had talked to Claire that morning. The problem is that I didn't want to do that, I didn't want to go back to the subject of our discussion and I knew that Jenny would do exactly that if I called her.

I decided to try to sleep, probably the next day everything would come back as it was before, nothing to worry about. I woke up a little late on Monday and saw that I didn't have any message on my cell phone, but I couldn't stay at home waiting for them to call me to go to the flower shop. And I needed to take Claire's things that were in my backpack, she would certainly need them soon. I had a coffee and with a smile on my face I went to my Sassenach. When I got there, I saw that Claire was with her back to the door talking with someone and I decided not to interrupt.

“Geillis, I told you we have nothing! He is just my friend and I'm tired of explaining it!” She spoke nervously and frustrated. “I have my business to take care of, I don't have time for a relationship and much less with Jamie! He's already got his life together and doesn't have to work hard like me to have money at the end of the month!”

I stood there, trying to understand if I had heard the words correctly, if she had said that about me. Hearing from my sister that I wasn't responsible hurt me, but hearing from Claire that I was a lazy guy who didn't have to work like her was like a hole opened below my feet and the fall was imminent. Did she really think that about me? After everything I shared with her? After all we talked about? The only reaction I could get was to drop the backpack I was holding and leave without saying anything. But the noise must have caught her attention because while I was walking fast from the flower shop, I heard Claire's voice screaming my name non-stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, this was not what you were expecting to happen between our lovely friends. But please forgive me and be patient, I promise will be worth it! ❤❤❤


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank you all for the comments and support ❤❤❤

_**POV Claire** _

Why did London have to be so far away? Why had I agreed to come to Scotland on a motorcycle? And why was I so angry with the person sitting in front of me? I knew he had realized and I also knew he would want to talk about it. But I didn't want to, in fact I didn't even know why I was so angry. Of course, I didn't like that he shared with Ian what we were doing between four walls, but I wasn't so innocent in imagining that he wouldn't comment anything with his brother-in-law and childhood friend what was going on between us. And Ian was no fool, anyone with eyes and ears knew that Jamie had spent two nights with me in Lallybroch.

But then why was I so upset? Why did I hardly feel like looking at my best friend? Why his body close to mine was making me feel everything but safe as always? Because I had mixed things up! Because I thought I had seen something in Jamie's eyes. Because his touches were different, more intense, more caring. I had made the big mistake of letting the emotions of the moment take me to a place that clearly did not exist for Jamie. A place that also does not exist for me, for us. So why could I not ignore this feeling of disappointment and indignation inside me?

After long torturing hours on the bike, we finally arrived in London. And if I thought everything was difficult before, now it would get worse. I wanted to be alone, I wanted some time to try to understand what I was feeling and put my head in place. I just wanted things to get back to normal between me and Jamie, but I didn't even know if this was possible, what I knew was that I couldn't and didn't want to be next to him now. And how hard it was to let him go! I tried to smile, I tried to show that everything was fine and I just wanted to rest, but of course he didn't believe me. But I knew he would respect my wish, after all I knew my friend and he wouldn't do anything I didn't want to.

And so we headed to different destinations. I went to my house and he, to his. When I entered my apartment, I took a deep breath and threw myself to bed. What I most wanted was to sleep and only wake up the next day, where everything would go back to the way it was. I would go back to my routine of taking care of my plants, my business and Jamie would be there to make me laugh when I needed more. But of course none of this happened. Even ignoring my cell phone and Jamie's message notifications, I spent most of the night awake and when I got some sleep, I had the most improper dreams you could have with your best friend! He had really ruined sex for any other man in my life. Ugh!

The next morning I tried to cheer up and be optimistic, even without my precious hours of sleep. I went down to the flower shop earlier than usual and for a few hours I was locked in my office just solving financial and bureaucratic problems that Mary had left on my desk. I was not willing to face my partner's prying eyes, but it seems this was not her idea since she knocked on my door as soon as she arrived at the shop.

“Claire? I didn't want to disturb you, but your friend...Geillis, she...well, she was insistent and said that if I didn't tell you she was here, she...” Mary was stuttering, a clear sign that she was nervous and it was all Geillis' fault that she liked to terrorize my partner's life.

“All right Mary, I'm coming. You can tell Geillis that she doesn't need to make your life a living hell...” and as I finished an e-mail, I took a deep breath for the conversation that I knew would come as soon as my friend laid eyes on me.

Two minutes later, I let go of my things in my office and went to the front of the shop where I could hear Geillis laughing, she was probably trying to make Mary tell something and having fun with it.

“Ahh, look who finally decided to grant me her noble presence! After that redhead appeared in yer life, I was completely put aside!”

“Don't be dramatic!” I rolled my eyes. “You always left me aside for any man who appeared in your life, and they were not few!”

“So, ye decided to make it official? Is he the man of yer life?” she said with a satisfied smile on her face.

“That's not what I said! I only said that I am always ignored by you when there is something better to do...”

“Of course, staying with that redhead for sure is a better thing to do than spending time with me!”

“Geillis! Stop distorting what I'm saying!”

“Are ye going to tell me that nothing is happening between ye two? Just friendship? Dinna think I forgot the things I saw that day...and ye rode miles and miles to Scotland on a motorcycle just because of a friend? I ken ye Beauchamp! When ye were with Frank, ye refused to go to Oxford for a university event because ye couldna leave the flower shop, but for Jamie ye didna think twice about dropping everything here and going to another country!”

I knew she would throw it all in my face, but I wasn't willing to listen to it all that day. Everything that had happened on this trip was still not clear to me and to hear from my friend that I had done nothing like that for my boyfriend, just made me more irritated with what Jamie had done with my life. Everything was much simpler before he appeared. I took a deep breath to try to calm down, but it was in vain, Geillis' smile only provoked me even more:

“Geillis, I already told you that we have nothing! He is just my friend and I'm tired of explaining it!” I spoke almost screaming with my friend. “I have my business to take care of, I don't have time for a relationship and much less with Jamie! He's already got his life together and doesn't have to work hard like me to have money at the end of the month!”

I noticed that my friend was quiet and with her eyes wide open. That's when I heard the noise, the same noise as the day before in Lallybroch. When I turned around, I saw what I feared the most, Jamie's backpack thrown to the floor and the flower shop's door closing. Fuck! He and this habit of arriving in silence in places! How much had he heard from our conversation? It doesn't matter Beauchamp, go after him! My legs took a long time to react, but I finally managed to run out and shout his name desperately. I found him in the alley next to the shop where he usually parks his bike.

“Jamie!” I screamed once again and was ignored once more. “So it will be like this? Won't even give me a chance to explain myself?” I said it with a little anger.

“Explain what?” He answered by turning to me and I could see in his eyes that he was not happy. “I think ye were very clear with what ye think of me.”

“Jamie! You know Geillis, you know how she pisses me off and you weren't supposed to be here!”

“Oh of course! It was me who got in the way of yer moment with yer best friend! I'm sorry if I was worried about ye!”

“Why were you worried about me?” I asked confused and with a hint of irritation about the tone of voice he was using.

“Because ye've been weird since we left Lallybroch! Ye barely looked me in the eyes all day yesterday! I thought maybe Jenny had said something that upset ye, but from the looks of it ye two have the same opinion about me.”

“I was not weird! I just wanted to be alone for a while, like I said, we weren't born stuck together Jamie! We are JUST friends!” I couldn't understand why I was talking like that when the reason I went after him was to apologize.

“I thought ye enjoyed spending yer time with me, but it's clear that ye think I'm a slacker who does nothing but get in yer way!”

“Don't be dramatic! I already told you that I was just mad at my friend! At least I didn't tell her about the benefits of our friendship!” By now I was screaming and emphasizing the words I wanted to provoke him even more.

I saw that he stayed in silence for a while, seeming to decide what to say:

“Benefits that ye agreed to have. And I wouldna have minded if you had told her, she already knew, like most people who hang out with us. At least I didna tell anyone that I wouldna have a relationship with ye because ye were nothing more than a "gardener".”

His look at me was serious, but more than that, it was a look of disappointment. And as much as I was angry with him at the beginning of our discussion, now I knew what I had done and he was right. Everyone knew that we weren't just friends, that we had such "benefits", after all we couldn't hide as well as I thought. But the secrets we shared about us were ours alone and I had just broken Jamie's trust. Of course Geillis wouldn't even care about what I had said, she wouldn't take anything seriously, but Jamie hearing those words coming out of my mouth when he had shared with me the night before that his sister had done the same and hurt him, was totally wrong.

“Jamie...” I tried to talk, but where to start?

“Do ye remember when ye established the terms of our agreement?” he spoke interrupting me. “That when we didna want to do it anymore, we just had to say it? So...”

“No! Jamie! I...you don't understand, I know I said too much, but you have...” argh, the words were confusing in my mind, I couldn't articulate a decent sentence, but I knew what he would do and it was scaring me.

“No, Claire, I dinna”. He said seriously and put his helmet on, without letting me say anything else.

As I watched him leave, all our discussion went through my head and I could only remember that he had called me "Claire", and it wasn't because he was trying to get my attention. It was because I was no longer his Sassenach.

_**POV Jamie** _

The words exchanged in our discussion kept spinning in my head while accelerating the bike as fast as I could. I didn't want to go home, I didn't want to think about anything that had happened, I just wanted to feel the wind hitting my chest to see if somehow I could breathe more calmly. But my heart was racing and nothing was calming it. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't have a destiny in mind. Only my heart seemed to think more than I did at the moment and took me to the place I always liked to go to think, reflect ... the stables of Hyde Park.

I got off the bike and thought I could only be playing a trick on myself. There had been the place where I shared with Claire the problems of my family, the secrets that nobody knew about me until then, the place I felt I would have a friend for the rest of my life. But now there it only brought me a tightness in my chest, in knowing that the person with whom I trusted my fears, my secrets, betrayed me in a way I didn't imagine could happen. Was I being very dramatic as she had stated? I might, a little. But she knew how hard it was for me to admit my flaws, my fears, my feelings and how vulnerable I had become next to her.

Many may think I'm an easy person to live with, a person who sees no problem in exposing what I'm feeling and always ends up talking too much. Yes, that's me. I like to meet people, talk, entertain and have fun, but this facet of mine is like a protection for nobody to get too close, ask too much and know me too much. Claire never needed to see this side of me, with her I was always Jamie Fraser that only a few people know and of course it scared me, but I was feeling very good to let the fear prevent me from deepening that relationship.

I knew that the proposal to be friends with benefits had come out of my mouth, but she agreed and I left her the will to determine the way she would like us to do everything. So I couldn't understand why she was mad at me! Okay, commenting with Ian may have left her embarrassed, but who was she kidding? The entire Lallybroch already knew that I had slept in her room and they weren't so innocent as to think that we were just sleeping there, even though in parts that had actually happened. If she was so worried about talking and saying to everyone that we were just friends, why get angry when they found out that something else was happening between us? Something without commitment, but that did us good? We were adults! We didn't owe anybody satisfaction and I didn't care much about other people's opinions.

But that was no justification for her to have done what she did. She said that she was just angry with her friend, but that doesn't absolve her from saying something about me that hurt me. I never thought that she was not enough for me because she had left the medical school to open a shop that was her dream, on the contrary, I admired her much more because of it. In the same way she said that she admired me for having faced my uncles, for having protected my family and not being a spoiled boy. But by the way she talked to Geillis, this is not what she really thought about me, she thought I had an easy life and was not good enough for her. That's what hurt the most, so everything she had said before was a lie?

“How much longer are ye going to stand there looking at nothing?” Rupert, my cousin, said scaring me.

“I was just thinking...” I said low while trying to get myself together, I didn't want him to see me that way, I didn't want to be questioned about what was happening.

“Do ye want to take Jasper for a ride to "think" a little more?” he laughed a little, probably because I wasn't with the best of faces.

“It wasn't what I had planned, but why not? Is it quiet around here today?” I talked while following him to the aisle where Jasper, the horse I always chose when going there, was.

“Monday is never the tourists favorite day to ride a horse, we only have a few classes later. Ye can stay as long as ye want! And Jasper is already so used to ye that he ends up being selective with other people.”

I tried to smile a little for my cousin, but the most I got was a weak smile. Who knows, maybe riding a little would help me to breathe more calmly and put my heart in place. Of course I was wrong about this because I could only remember the last time I had ridden, with Claire leaning on my chest and I showing all the outstanding places for me in Lallybroch. It was ridiculous to think that in the last months all the memories that made me smile, Claire was included in them. She had taken most of my life, my routine and now I was lost, not knowing what to do without remembering her.

After only a few minutes, I returned with Jasper to the stables and Rupert was still there, organizing the equipment and horses that would be used in riding classes that day.

“Today the ride was fast! Could ye think of everything ye wanted?” he asked amazed to see me back so fast.

“No, but Jasper is always good company anyway!” I spoke by passing my hand through the soft coat of the horse.

“I heard ye went to Lallybroch this weekend.” of course he knew, nothing was kept secret in this family. “Did ye happen to bring a bottle of whisky to yer cousin who always lets ye use the stables when ye need to _think_?” he laughed again when he said that.

“This time I couldna bring anything, but Rupert, ye ken ye just have to ask Ian to send it to ye, dinna ye?”

“Ahh but it's complicated, until he has time to send a single bottle to a person as insignificant as me here in London...ye could expand the distillery and open a branch here, aye? It would be much more practical, besides making a success in the pub that I always go, there are several Scots who miss a good whisky!”

“Not a bad idea! Who knows ye can't convince Ian?”

“This would be a mission for ye, my friend! Ye ken he always does everything ye ask... it's always been that way! That's why it took him so long to be dating Jenny, since ye had asked him to stay away from yer sister!” and he laughed. I also ended up laughing because I remembered when we were kids and I made Ian promise that he would never do anything with my sister because she was too annoying and it would mess up our friendship. Well, in parts I was right, my sister was annoying, but the only person I could imagine for my best friend.

I went home feeling a little better, but when I arrived I saw that there were several missed calls on my cell phone, as well as some messages and of course they were all from Claire. I was not prepared to talk to her and much less read her messages. I sat for a while on the couch thinking about what I was going to do and next thing I knew I was writing my letter of resignation and forwarding it to Mary. I also apologized for not giving more notice, but that would recommend someone to replace me. As much as I was hurt with Claire, I would never cause her any harm on purpose, I was not like that and nothing would make me change.

A few minutes passed and I received a message from Mary, saying that she was upset because it didn't work out, but that she understood why I was doing it. Of course she must have known everything that had happened, Claire was never a good person to hide what she was feeling and probably her partner noticed. As I had promised, I recommended a delivery guy who had done some services for my uncles' company and had good references.

I took a deep breath and tried to convince myself that I had done the right thing. With everything that had happened, I did not have the reason to continue working there, I needed some time, I needed to digest everything I was feeling and nothing would work if I continued to see Claire every day, it would be torture for both of us and would only make the whole situation worse. I needed something to relax and make me stop feeling that constant chest tightness. The only solution I found was my whisky bottle.

While I was drinking one shot after another, I kept looking at the bottle of that liquid that reminded me of Claire's eyes. No, that's not what I wanted to do! I decided to read the label that I already knew in my head what was written, but that would distract me a little. Ian had asked me for help to develop the visual identity of our whisky, but that text about the story of how Fraser Distillery had come up was something totally his. At first I was against it, I didn't like it, but I was still resentful of my father's death and how things had become an obligation for me. But now I couldn't contain the pride I felt in reading those words, Ian had really hit on showing that our distillery was something familiar and full of history.

That's when I remembered Rupert's words. It really was a good idea to expand the business, because for now the distillery only had the capacity to supply the beverage to Scotland and some cities in England that were near the border. I didn't know if it was the effect of the several shots I had taken, if it was because I wanted to think about everything but Claire, but I started writing down everything it would take to open a branch of our company in London and what I quickly realized was that we needed money and it wasn't little. Looking for a bank for such a loan would be something impractical and we could end up with a giant debt if everything went wrong.

An investor would be the best way out, a person who would be interested in our history, our business and who would have a lot of money. And I knew that person, John Grey! He had worked with my uncles and taught me many things about business. And best of all, his family had all the money we needed for this crazy idea of expansion to work. I needed to talk to Ian, but then I needed to sleep or eat, anything that would make my room stop spinning. I ended up lying down and slept with a smile on my face, thinking about how proud Claire would be of my idea. Aye, old habits die hard.


	20. Chapter 20

_**POV Claire** _

After spending a few minutes looking at the street with the hope that Jamie would turn around and come back to say that everything was just a joke and we could go back to work, I realized that I would have to go back to the reality of my life alone, without the person I have totally leaned on in the last few months. How had this happened? I was always an independent person, my parents forced me to be, because they were never there. But Jamie Fraser managed to break down the wall I had built around me and now I was totally uncovered and feeling as lost as ever.

When I entered the flower shop I saw that my dear friend Geillis was no longer there, great, she does the damage and leaves me alone to collect the pieces. But deep down it was better, I couldn't face her at the moment. Mary was still in the same place as before, behind the computer, totally silent and unaware of what was happening to me. But I knew this was a lie, Mary could be a person of few words, but she observed everything that happened around us and knew more than anyone the details that often went unnoticed to us, mere mortals.

I didn't want to talk, I didn't want to explain what had happened. So I murmured that I would go to my office and saw that she gave a slight smile, agreeing with her head. It seemed like I had run a marathon and dragged myself to my table. When I sat down, I saw that my cell phone was there and by a stupid impulse, I picked it up with the desire to see if it had any messages or missed calls. But I had nothing! I thought I would at least get a signal from Jamie, an emoji, a rude message, anything that would express that even though he was upset, he still cared about me. But nothing!

I got angry and called him. Voice mail. Once, twice, three times. Fuck you, Jamie Fraser! Yes, I was very angry! Why didn't he let me explain? Why won't he talk to me? By any chance he's perfect and never makes a mistake? I started sending several indignant and angry messages, messages that were far from being an apology. I took a deep breath and regretted it. What had I done? I wasn't like that and I was wrong. Of course he had the right not to answer me, if I was in his place I would probably do the same. Or not? I was so confused, I needed to breathe, to put my head and heart in place.

I took my cell phone and went to let Mary know that I would go up to my apartment to rest from a strong headache. I was not lying, my head was really hurting, I just didn't need to detail to her the reasons to be that way. That's when I saw the backpack. The object that had become the symbol of the whole discussion, something so insignificant, but that now caused me a tightening in my heart when I looked at it. Again I took a deep breath, I needed to get it out of there, I needed to make sure that Jamie probably wouldn't come back so soon to look for it and that I still needed the clothes that were inside.

Once again I dragged myself up the stairs. I just wanted to close my eyes and pretend that none of that had happened. That soon I would get a call from Jamie calling me lazy and that I needed to go down to the shop. Or that he was already waiting for me with the coffee to put me in a good mood. How did everything in my life come down to being in Jamie's company? Of course I still enjoyed spending some time alone, but being next to him was something so comfortable that I didn't mind losing my privacy, something so valuable to me.

I went to my room and put the backpack on the bed. I needed to get my stuff out of it, but I could only stare at that object and remember everything we had done on this trip to Scotland. It seemed that everything had lasted more than just four days. To me Lallybroch looked like the house I never had, in fact the home I never had. Because big and luxurious houses were never a problem for my family, but we never built a home and I managed to have that in those few days with the Fraser-Murray family.

But what surprised me the most was Jamie's company. Of course we spent time together here in London, but nothing with the intensity of Scotland. That country really had something magical. But what magic was that? What had changed between me and Jamie? What made everything more complicated and painful? Why couldn't I make that chest pain disappear? I started taking things out of the backpack, I needed to be distracted, I needed to stop thinking about that Scottish bastard. But it was practically impossible, since each piece of clothing brought back to me the memory of a moment of us together. When I took off the last piece of clothing, a small package fell in my lap.

The plant! My heart, which was already tight, started to beat at an intense pace. How had I forgotten it? The plant that Ellen Fraser cultivated in Lallybroch to bring hope to those who had already lost all joy of living. The flowers that could survive the intense winter in Scotland only showed how strong they were and could really bring the spirit back to those who thought they had no more reason to live. And how could I not remember Jamie's bright eyes as he told how his parents had overcome all the difficulties that life had brought them and managed to create a small and modest empire for their children? My eyes were filled with tears.

My parents didn't have that sensitivity, that concern for me. At least they never showed it. I mean, they only did it while I was following their plan for my life, when I changed everything, our relationship also changed and all the admiration disappeared from my parents' eyes. How I wish I had met Brian and Ellen Fraser, they seemed to be wonderful people, just like their son. Jamie. Why couldn't I forget him even for a minute? Because he wasn't just taking up space in my heart anymore. Now he took up a lot more and scared me.

I looked at the flower one more time and I had a kind of snap. I already knew what I needed to do to distract my thoughts from Jamie. I already knew what to do to show my parents that I was not just a "gardener". I grabbed my purse and quickly went downstairs to the flower shop. I needed to let Mary know that I was leaving and probably wouldn't be back anytime soon. But when I saw the way she looked at me, I knew she was hiding something, I knew my partner and she was terrible at lying to me.

“Mary, what happened? Why are you looking at me like that?” I questioned her in a way that I knew would make her more nervous.

“Nothing happened...no, nothing.” And of course it was a lie, because she was stuttering.

“Mary...if you don't tell me what happened, I won't leave the shop and it will only annoy me even more, because I will miss an important appointment.” I spoke firmly, sitting next to her.

“It's just...well, what happened is that Jamie...”

“What about Jamie? Did he call? He wanted to talk to me? Did he text you? What is it, Mary?” I knew I was yelling at her and not letting her talk, but I wasn't in the mood. I wanted to know right away what Jamie had done.

“He quit.” she spoke softly, unable to face me.

“What????” I shouted once again, now outraged. “When did he quit? And did he come here?”

“No, he sent an e-mail...”

“That.... that bloody Scot!” was the only thing I could think of. “What does he think he's doing? And we're going to be left with no one to deliver our orders?”

“He recommended someone else...” again she said low, almost a murmur, but I was used to it and listened perfectly.

“I don't need anyone else, I need him!” probably my face wasn't the best, because Mary looked at me scared.

“Claire...I think you'd better sit down for a while.” She spoke in her usual calm voice as she tried to pull me back to the seat behind the counter, the same one I was sitting on a few minutes ago before I started yelling at her.

“I don't need to sit down, I need to get out of here and forget that Jamie Fraser exists! At least for a few hours.” that last part I spoke almost to assure myself because I knew it was impossible for me to forget him.

Mary gave up trying to hold me and nodded at me to go. I knew she would take care of everything while I was away and also knew that she wouldn't ask me any more questions unless I started the conversation. I left the flower shop with my legs a little shaky, but I managed to call a cab and went to the destination that hoped to bring me some calm amid the chaos that was my life at the moment. Minutes later I was entering the great building of Imperial College London, which was specialized in Science, Engineering and Medicine. And where my colleague was developing the research on hybrid flowers with my help.

Remember I told you about the daring project I was studying and working hard to execute? Sarah had studied with me at Oxford University, where I ended up doing only one semester and giving up to open my own business. We shared the same passion for plant genetics and botany, and when she knew that I had fulfilled my dream of opening a flower shop, we started to think about how interesting it would be to create a species of flower that would be resistant to the intense European winter and thus maintain the profit of flower shops in all seasons of the year.

Of course, having a colleague who studied a lot about the subject and having a super laboratory to do all the research helped me a lot. I still had a lot to learn and what I shared with her was just my daily experience with flowers and what worked or not for our project. Because the flower we wanted to create had to be not only resistant, but also beautiful. So when I entered Sarah's laboratory that afternoon with the plant I had brought from Lallybroch, I saw her eyes shining in seeing finally a solution to our project succeed.

She also shared that I couldn't have appeared at a better time. A large agricultural company in London was looking for a new project among the research fellows of that institution to invest. They did this annually as an incentive for new researchers and also to always be aware of innovations that arose in that not so broad popular field of work. If our project was chosen, they would pay a good amount of money to obtain the rights to execute and then sell what we had created. Of course they needed concrete data that our hybrid flower was a real possibility before they took it to the big laboratories they owned and produced on a large scale.

Besides the money, we would be highlighted in publications of the area and we could participate in the annual event of the company. A big gala at the famous Café Royal Hotel, where David Bowie held his events and Muhammad Ali had fought for three rounds. Anyway, all they offered was a prestige I never imagined I would achieve, but seeing the happiness in Sarah's eyes, I couldn't help but be happy and anxious about the potential of all this.

We spent the afternoon seeing all the genetic details of that plant, as well as the other one that we wanted to put together in order to create just one. Of course, by a stroke of fate, the two chosen flowers were Scottish. Forget-me-not had been the first chosen, I always had a fascination for it and now it seemed that everything was laughing at me. The flower that Ellen Fraser planted was encouraging while the other one kept you from forgetting a dear person. This all made so much sense because I could only think about Jamie, and when Sarah asked what name we would give to that project and the possible flower we would create, the name almost automatically escaped from my lips: Sassenach.

_**POV Jamie** _

After that fateful day, I decided that I would try to put all the ideas I had for the family business into practice. I needed to do something to not think about how much I was missing Claire in my life. Of course it didn't work out the way I wanted, I still thought about her in practically everything I did, but at least I knew I was doing something useful with my free time and with my life.

I contacted John Grey the next day and we set up a meeting for the following week. He wanted me to show more concrete data about this expansion and not just ideas. For that I needed Ian, he had all the data from the distillery and knew what it took to expand the business. I had a difficult mission ahead of me, which was to convince my family that having a possible branch in London would be great and even though our father always wanted us to keep the distillery as a family business and close to Lallybroch, an expansion would not take away the quality and authenticity of our whisky.

The video call to my brother-in-law was full of exclamations, indignation and uncertainty. My sister only wanted to know why after all these years with no interest in what was happening at the distillery, now I wanted to participate and still with this absurd idea that could sink everything she and Ian had built. I knew she was still angry with me because of our recent discussion, but I was much angrier with her. After all, my fight with Claire had to do with everything they thought about me in relation to work.

“Janet, weren't ye the one who always said that I had to take advantage of my potential and get a real job? So that's what I'm trying to do!” I spoke louder than I intended after she made one more remark about my sudden idea for the distillery.

“So, after yelling at me and making it clear that I was selfish in wanting it, ye changed yer mind? Does Claire have anything to do with yer decision?”

“Leave Claire out of it, I called to discuss the distillery and not my personal life.” I spoke harshly.

Ian noticed my look and tried to take over the conversation again, asking questions about what the meeting with John Grey would be like and what we would have to present to him. Jenny did not seem satisfied with her exclusion from the conversation, but after receiving a reprehensible look from her husband, she said she would see what the children were doing and then check in with Ian about what we had discussed. I felt more relieved and more comfortable after that and the conversation flowed until late at night.

I spent the rest of the week getting ready for the meeting and was really excited about everything that could happen if John accepted the proposal to fund my project. I knew it wouldn't be easy to convince him, he liked to invest in business that would be a sure profit for him and his family. But I also knew that I was good at convincing people and the data I had about our distillery was very promising, Ian had done a great job all these years and now I would finally be able to repay this dedication in some way.

The meeting arrived quickly and I couldn't be more satisfied with the result. Grey had really liked the proposal, his family had nothing in the beverage area and he knew that there was nothing better than a traditional Scottish family to enter the competitive London market. Of course there was still a lot to be done, but the kick-off was on and now it was all about running after everything. Despite being the Major Investor, John gave Ian and I complete freedom to choose the team that would be responsible for this expansion. I could only smile when I thought about how happy the Mackenzie brothers would be to know that we would now compete with them in the land of the queen.

Two months flew by with the preparation to open our business and next thing I knew I was going to the train station to pick up Ian. He decided to come and meet personally the people who were involved in our branch and even though I said that it was not necessary all this commuting, he insisted that even though I was doing a great job, he needed to see up close if everything was right, truly. But deep down I think he just wanted to escape a little from the chaos that was life in Lallybroch.

After I picked him up, we went straight to the place where they were building the necessary structures to produce and store our precious whisky. Ian was amazed to see how advanced we were in construction and how having lots of money made all the difference. The distillery my father built took years to get to where it is now and still didn't have all the structure we were building in this one in London. Even though it was much bigger and more modern, we still wanted to keep the simple essence of the Highlands and that was the part where Ian came in, he knew what we needed to keep making the best whisky that country had ever seen, and drunk, of course.

When we finished checking everything we needed, I took Ian to have lunch in a pub that I had discovered and attended a lot in the last months. I had fun with the fear of my brother-in-law riding a motorcycle with me, I knew he did not like it, but I did not know that he was so terrified of being on two wheels and at high speed. When we stopped at the pub, he looked like he was going to faint at any moment and only got more irritated with my laugh at seeing him in such state. The only time I had seen him that way was when wee Jamie was born, that he decided that filming the birth would be something beautiful to remember. He just didn't know that he had little tolerance for things he had no idea involved the birth of a baby.

We were drinking a beer to refresh and calm Ian, when he decided that talking about my personal life would be a great topic for lunch.

“Jamie, I ken ye're very happy with this expansion and all the work ye've accomplished so far, but I couldna help but notice yer look every time someone says Claire's name...” Of course he would talk about Claire, I knew I wouldn't escape that conversation for much longer.

“Even so, ye are talking about her.” I answered dryly.

“Because ye never talked again! One day ye are with her in Lallybroch, laughing and happy as never before and the next day ye just want to talk about business, as if she never existed!”

“Ian, if I wanted to talk about this subject, I would have talked before...”

“I ken ye Jamie, ye would never speak if I didn't ask and force the words out of yer mouth!”

“All right, ye want to know what? Isn't it obvious what happened? We argued and stopped talking. That's it!”

“Of course, this is obvious! But I want to ken why this sudden argument, ye seemed like ye were born stuck together back in Lallybroch.” Hearing him use the same words Claire had used in our discussion made me squirm in my chair and Ian noticed.

“We were not born stuck together! And fights can happen at any time.”

“Sure they can, but so can making up. Jamie, dinna try to bring the speech that ye were just friends with benefits and nothing else...”

“It's ye who are talking, for me the subject was already closed after I told ye what happened. 

“I dinna ken if ye remember, but I've ken Jenny since we were kids...”

“Of course I remember, after all I was there and ye only met her because ye were my friend!”

“Aye, and we grew up as best friends, inseparable. But I noticed that as time went by, I wanted more than just to be by her side as a friend, I wanted her with me all the time and...”

“Ian! I dinna want to ken details of what ye wanted to do with my sister!” I interrupted him.

“I wouldna say that! But as I was saying when ye interrupted me, I wanted more because I realized that the place she held in my heart was much bigger than just friendship. I loved her and was completely in love!”

I couldn't say anything and I just made some noises that meant nothing.

“What I wanted to say is that every great love begins with a friendship! My wife is my best friend and I dinna regret a single day of having made the decision to declare myself to her because I knew that everything had changed and I couldna live without her by my side.”

I took another sip of my beer, but it didn't go down my throat, making me choke. Ian hit me on the back and said he needed to rest from the trip, but that he would take a cab to go to the hotel he was staying. I stood there not knowing what to do with the words I had heard from my brother-in-law. I took my cell phone and started to see the photos from the gallery. It was full of pictures of me and Claire, of all the moments we spent together and I couldn't not smile when I remembered each one of them. That's when the first video I had recorded of her came up, the day she was cleaning the apartment and singing Justin Timberlake:

**_'Cause I don't wanna lose you now_ ** **_  
I'm lookin' right at the other half of me  
The vacancy that sat in my heart  
Is a space that now you hold  
Show me how to fight for now  
And I'll tell you, baby, it was easy  
Comin' back here to you once I figured it out  
You were right here all along   
It's like you're my mirror   
My mirror staring back at me   
I couldn't get any bigger  
With anyone else beside of me_ **

The words of the song had never made as much sense to me as they did at that moment, just like Ian's words. How could I have been so dumb? How could I have been so blind? It was clear and in front of me the whole time! I was completely and hopelessly in love with Claire! And I had lost her! I drank all my beer and went after something stronger to try to make me forget the pain I was feeling in my chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally!!!!! It took longer than we thought, but now Jamie knows! Now what is he going to do? 🤔🤔❤


	21. Chapter 21

_**POV Claire** _

Two months had passed. Two months I was working incessantly on the project with Sarah. Two months that I wasn't talking to Jamie. Two months that I was looking for any excuse not to think about him and how much I missed him. Two months that I was failing miserably in this mission. But it had been his choice, I called, sent him messages and he ignored me. So I would do the same, if he didn't want to hear what I had to say, I didn't want that friendship anymore either. Was that true? Of course not, but I was too proud to look for him again, to insist and beg that I was missing his company every day.

The project was going very well, Sarah was more than satisfied with the flower I had taken to her. Our creation was working and I was completely fulfilled for finally getting to use some of my knowledge for something innovative in my field. But this was not making me completely happy. I felt a void in my chest that could not be filled with any work. But I was trying to ignore it every day, as well as the tiredness I was feeling in the last month. I knew I was spending hours in the flower shop and then in the lab with Sarah, but I never thought I was that out of shape. I ended up getting home and having no energy for anything but sleep.

I was on another day at work when I received an email from my dad: "Don't forget your annual checkup. Call Joe." As always a message without any affection. And he still treated me like a child, the only thing he had left to do was send a formal e-mail to ask if I was brushing my teeth every night and taking my vitamins. But I knew that if I ignored his reminder, he would send Joe after me to have my damn annual checkup, and last thing I wanted now was to be treated like an irresponsible child.

I looked for my contacts and soon found Joe's phone number. He's been my doctor ever since we moved back to London and I was grateful that he was the complete opposite of my father. The two of them had been college colleagues, but they couldn't be more different. While my father was that cold, distant doctor, Joe treated his patients like his best friends. He liked to talk at appointments, know how we were doing, and only then went into the boring details, let's say. And best of all, he never treated me any different because he was my father's friend, he listened to my complaints and regrets without telling my family anything.

“Lady Jane! I thought you would ignore me this year since you are very famous in your new business!” Joe spoke when he heard my voice on the phone.

“If my father knew your affectionate nickname, I'm sure there would be no friendship between you anymore!” I said it laughing. He called me that since he met me. Joe was American, went to England to go to college, and when he first heard me speak, he started calling me Lady Jane because he insisted that my accent sounded like he was sitting with the queen having tea. “And I'm not very famous! Not like you who has several articles published as one of Oxford's most promising young doctors.”

“Yeah, you're right, I'm much more famous than you!” he laughed. “But let's get to the point. Did we schedule the same exams as always? Are you feeling something different?”

“It can be the usual, to please my father. And I'm just tired, that's the only thing I've been feeling lately... that and awfully sleepy! But I've always been sleepy. Mary has been complaining that I'm very angry, that my mood keeps wobbling all the time and she's always afraid to say anything. But I've always been like this, I blame the lack of coffee that was leaving me with stomachache and that's why I stopped drinking...but anyway, it's all due to the excess of work, only I can't complain, right?” And the next thing I knew, I was babbling when I just needed to answer Joe's question with a few words. I guess I was missing someone to vent.

“Hum...” Joe mumbled and remained silent for a while. “I've already made your exam requisitions, can you come here at 8 tomorrow? Because since you'll have to come fasting, better early, I don't want to make my dear LJ even angrier at Mary!” and laughed when he noticed that I snorted on the phone.

“All right Joe, 8 o'clock I'll be there!”

We said goodbye and I turned my attention to the flower arrangements I needed to make for some clients. But now I was a little more excited, talking with Joe always left me with a smile on my face. We didn't used to talk all the time, he worked too hard on hospital shifts and appointments at his office, and I was totally focused on the flower shop. But I knew that at least once a year I would hear that soft voice calling me Lady Jane, the same voice that always ended up giving me some advice like a father, since mine hadn't done that in a long time. Joe was one of the only good things my father's profession had brought to my life.

As promised, the next day I was in the hospital at 8 am sharp. Unfortunately I couldn't talk to my doctor and friend, he was attending an emergency and left my exams to a responsible nurse. This was not unusual, since Joe was just by my side while other people performed the necessary exams. But I really wanted to talk to him in person, I missed being able to talk to someone who listened to me carefully.

I couldn't complain about Mary, because she really listened to me. It was just that, she was always apprehensive about talking about something that might upset me or annoy me. I couldn't blame her, lately I was unloading on her all the anger and frustration I felt for the absence of a certain Scot. He was always my escape valve, the person I could talk about anything, scream, vent because he usually did the same thing and was fun. I realized that his absence also made Mary regress all the progress she had made in letting go more. Bloody Scot!

The next day, I was focused assembling a bouquet for a customer who wanted to make a surprise for his wife's birthday, when I heard my cell phone ring. I ignored it, because I wasn't expecting any call and I didn't want to let go of the flowers that were in my hand to then have to do it all again. But the person who was calling me seemed insistent and kept calling. All clumsy, I managed to hit my finger on the screen to answer on speakerphone.

“LJ! Are you busy?” Joe's voice echoed through the greenhouse.

“The missed calls didn't give you that tip?” I joked, but I noticed he wasn't laughing.

“Can you come to my office at the end of the day?” his voice was still as soft as ever, but it was more serious.

“I can, but did something happen? Is it to talk about my exams? Are they ready? Can't you send me the results by e-mail as usual?”

“I think it's better if we talk in person.”

“Joe, you're scaring me. What's going on?”

“Don't worry Lady Jane, I just want to talk to you! I think you need to have a chat and take some time off from your work.” And the good mood was back in his voice.

“Okay...” I answered apprehensively. “If you insist, I'll show up when the activity here gets slower!”

We said goodbye with some jokes and laughs, but I wasn't feeling totally relieved. I knew Joe, he didn't call me to just talk in his office, even more during the week that he always had a busy schedule. Something was wrong and my mind started to create different scenarios, from a mild diabetes to cancer. But I was fine! I felt no pain anywhere in my body, nor any other symptom that would indicate a serious illness. Of course I was tired, but it was normal, I was working too much, standing too long and eating too little.

The day seemed to drag on, I couldn't focus on anything else and Mary had to take me away from the computer when she saw me google symptoms of brain cancer. When it was near four o'clock in the afternoon, I couldn't stand sitting in my office looking at that empty wall anymore. I really needed to decorate my shop better. I decided I couldn't do anything else and looked for a cab that would take me to Joe's office. If he was busy, I would wait there, better than suffer alone in my office.

“Joe! Go on, tell me what I have because I know something is wrong for you to make me come here!” I spoke as soon as I entered his office, without even giving him time to greet me.

“Very good to see you too, LJ! It's not even like it's been a year since we've seen each other in person!” he opened a smile when he saw my face. “Before I say anything, let's sit down.”

“Is it that serious?” If he wanted me to sit down, it probably was.

“Sometimes I forget that you are a doctor's daughter and you know all the tricks we have to tell when someone is dying...”

“Joe!” I screamed as I watched him laugh.

“Could I scare you?” – he was still laughing – “But now I'm going to tell you why I called you here. When you told me about your tiredness, the extreme sleep you were feeling beyond the mood changes and stomach pain, I decided to include one more exam among the several you do every year. And it is about its result that I want to talk to you.”

“What exam I did without knowing?”

“The Beta-hcg.”

When the words came out of Joe's mouth, I felt as if the world had stopped around me and all the blood from my body was going to end up on my big toe. Of course I knew what the test was, and it was obvious the result, if it was negative, he wouldn't have called me to come to his office. And that's when a movie started playing in my head, the trip to Scotland, Jamie pushing me against the wall next to the Pub, the night in Lallybroch... and the lack of something very important, the blessed box of condoms that had remained in my bedside table! How could I be so irresponsible? How could I forget something I had never forgotten before? With nobody! Joe's voice calling me brought me back to reality and by his tone, I must have been scaring him.

After two glasses of water and a fan glued to my face, I managed to get back to my normal color and Joe calmed down. While he was telling me everything I should do from then on, I kept thinking about what I would do. Jamie! I needed to tell him! But how would I do that? And I also had my family...

“Joe!” I yelled interrupting what he was saying. “Don't tell my father anything!”

“You know I don't do that Lady Jane, you know I take doctor-patient confidentiality very seriously. And besides, I don't think it's my job to tell your parents, I can be their friend, but that's up to you and you alone.”

“Thank you, Joe.” I gave him a weak smile as he squeezed my hand.

We talked some more and Joe convinced me to leave an appointment with my gynecologist, who in this case was his wife, Gail. I agreed with everything he recommended to me, but I was not really paying attention. I still couldn't believe that it was true, that I was pregnant, that I was going to be a mother and Jamie was the father! No, that couldn't be real. I left the office and it seemed to be floating over the streets of London, I didn't know why, but I was walking without direction. But the next thing I knew, I was walking to a place I knew, Jamie's apartment.

I took my cell phone from my purse and called him. I needed to know if he was there, we needed to talk and if not now, I would lose the courage I had gathered. Of course he didn't answer, so I sent him a message that maybe he could read, but anyway, I would go to his apartment. If he wasn't there, I would stay until he showed up, what I had to talk about couldn't wait Jamie's good will. When I was across the street from the building where he lived, about to cross it, I saw a scene that made my feet stick to the ground.

Jamie was in his apartment, by the way, he was in the front door of the building, but the problem he wasn't alone, Laoghaire was clinging on his neck.

_**POV Jamie** _

I was already on my third shot of whisky and the feeling of being with my hands tied did not disappear. Now that I had discovered my true feelings for Claire, I was more lost than ever. We weren't talking, and even if we were, what would I do? Declaring myself to her and hope for her to feel the same? Our last conversation kept going through my head like a movie, just like her insistent words "we weren't born stuck together, we're just friends". She had made this clear more than once and why would it be different now? Just because I was in love with her, it didn't mean that she felt the same way about me.

I knew I needed to do something, but for now sitting around drinking seemed to be the best solution. I was afraid, I had never felt what I was feeling for Claire. How had I not realized this before? And then I started to go over the pictures on my cell phone again and every moment of ours together. I had been a fool, there was no way I wasn't in love, she was everything in my life in the last months. All the happiest moments she was present, the sad ones too, but those were minimal when we were together. I was always laughing like a fool when she was beside me, having her in my arms was what made me feel safe and comfortable. Ugh, I was really blind and stupid!

The shots of whisky came down like water and I knew I would regret it later. But I wanted the grip on my chest to disappear, I wanted the last two months away from her not to have existed, I wanted to be able to go back in time and be in Lallybroch again. That's where I felt closest to Claire, my Sassenach. Now she was out of my reach, out of my arms and it hurt too much. I knew I was to blame for our separation, but her words still hurt me and I didn't know if I could go over everything, if I could trust her again. Who was I kidding? To have her by my side, to be able to feel those eyes of the color of the liquid in which I drowned my sorrows now staring at me with desire was what I wanted most at the moment.

I didn't want to have to go home, I didn't want to have to face any more memories of her, but the bartender didn't seem to agree with me. He refused to serve me another shot, said I had drunk too much and would call a cab to take me home. I knew he was right, I had no condition to take my bike to leave, but I lived nearby, a few blocks would do me good at that time. If I knew what I would find halfway, I would have accepted the cab. I was almost home when I heard my name being called desperately across the street. I recognized that voice, I couldn't forget it.

“Jamieeee!” How irritating it was the way she almost groaned at the end of the words, especially when she spoke my name.

I decided to try to ignore it, if she saw me still walking without looking back, maybe she would give up calling me. How innocent I was! Laoghaire never gives up what she wants and even less of me! She kept calling me and I tried to walk faster to see if my apartment would appear as magic in front of me. But my legs were lazy from all the alcohol ingested and I didn't get any success in what I wanted, so that blonde hair appeared in front of me making me stop walking abruptly.

“Christ!” I said when I bumped into that annoying smile. “Laoghaire!” and it was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

“Jamie! I was calling ye, but I guess ye were so focused that ye didna hear me!”

“Aye, I was focused on going home...alone!” I said as I watched her smile grow.

“Ahhh I'm sure ye won't mind a company! I was going that way, I'm sure it's fate!”

“What fate Laoghaire! Ye live far away from here and I prefer to walk alone, in fact I dinna feel like having yer company!” I knew I was being rude, but I was out of patience and I knew she wouldn't understand my message if it wasn't that way.

“Dinna be silly Jamiiie, ye always liked to be by my side!” she said while trying to take my hand.

“I liked it so much that's why I let ye go!” and I shook my hand, trying to separate myself from her.

“Ouch! Ye were never rude like that...something happened, I'm sure! Can I help ye feel better?”

“No! I'm rude because of ye! Will I have to draw for ye to see if ye understand that I dinna want yer company or to hear ye say my name in this annoying way?”

“I ken ye were just like that because ye drank too much! I can smell whisky from far away! Even if ye say you dinna want it, I'll go with ye to yer house! I promise to be quiet!”

I just snorted in response, I knew if I said anything else it would just be a waste of time and would lead to more discussion. I stepped up the pace, the faster I got home, the faster I would get rid of her. I finally saw my building and got the key that was in my pocket. I would enter fast, giving no chance to Laoghaire follow me because I knew that once she entered the building, I could not get her out. Mrs. McNab was her godmother and loved to have her goddaughter visit, as well as seeing the two of us together.

Of course, the abuse of whisky would do me some harm. I dropped the key on the floor and after bending down to pick it up, I was surprised with Laoghaire jumping on my neck to try to kiss me. Great. That's all I needed! I put my hands on her arms and pushed her away. I don't know if it had taken too long to do that, because she still had a smile on her face, as if she had been able to do something with me. I preferred not to ask anything, I turned, opened the door and closed as soon as possible, leaving her out. I was surprised that she did not insist, but I would not stay there to find out why.

When I finally arrived at my apartment, I threw myself on the couch. I was exhausted! What had been that day? It had been so intense that it looked like I had been hit by a truck. Actually, I had been and the truck had a name, Claire! I laughed when I thought she would hit me if she knew I had thought of that comparison. My cell phone vibrated in my pocket and I decided to see what it was before sleeping for the rest of the day. It was some kind of advertising message, but something else caught my attention and I jumped off the couch. Claire! She had called me several times and sent me a message: "We need to talk! Urgent! I'm coming to your house!".

Is she coming here? But what time was that message? I was desperate and couldn't focus on anything. Calm down Jamie! Breathe! The calls had been 20 minutes ago, the message a little less, 15. She probably sent it when she was already coming, since I didn't answer her calls. Where was she? With my hands shaking in a mixture of nervousness and anxiety, I called her. Nothing. Voicemail. No, no, Claire, answer me. What did you want to talk to me about urgently? I'm going to her house, that's it! But I wasn't with my motorcycle, it would take a long time by cab and that's when the room started spinning. I needed to sit down for a while. I needed to calm down. That's it. Breathe a little and go to Claire's house.

I opened my eyes scared. What had happened? I was just going to breathe and calm down, but by the way I had slept and until the next day! I got up from the couch and saw that my cell phone was lying on the floor, probably when I fell asleep, it fell from my hand. 8 o'clock in the morning. Christ! How did I sleep so much? Claire! I need to go there! She must have already opened the flower shop! I ran to the bathroom, took a shower, put on the first outfit I saw in front of me and went to get my bike. My head was throbbing, my body was all sore, but I didn't care, I needed to know what she wanted to talk to me so much.

When I arrived at the flower shop, I saw through the small window that only Mary was sitting behind the counter. Probably Claire was busy in her office. Great! That would give me time to take a deep breath and gather courage, now that I was there after so long, I didn't know what to do, what to say. I was never shy around my best friend, but the problem is that she wasn't just that anymore, she was everything in my life. I opened the door of the shop and hearing the noise, Mary raised her head and seeing me opened a shy smile.

“Mary!” I said quietly, almost in a whisper. “I want to...”

“She's not in the shop today.” And to my amazement, Mary interrupted me, answering the question before I even asked it.

“Couldna ye, maybe... I needed to...” since when did Jamie Fraser stutter to make a simple request?

“I think I have something here to help you.” and she stretched out her hand, showing a paper that looked like an invitation. “You need it more than I do! Enjoy it and good luck!” she spoke without any shyness, something I had never seen before.

When I picked up the paper she was holding, I saw that I was right, it was really an invitation. I read it a few times, but I couldn't understand what that event was. But Mary seemed not to mind giving me more details and turned her attention to the computer, leaving me standing there like an idiot. I left thinking why Claire had been invited to a gala at the famous Hotel Café Royal. Ok, it was an event of a big agronomist company, but why would they invite an owner of a flower shop? Not that Claire was someone so insignificant, but usually these parties were for big suppliers and entrepreneurs.

I arrived home and went to research more about that event. And that's when my eyes started to shine, I didn't know if it was of pride, of joy, of sadness for not being beside her all this time to share all this conquest or all this together. This ball was to celebrate the great initiative of the company to young researchers who created innovative projects for the area. What had Claire done? A hybrid flower! I knew she was studying about it, but I would never have imagined that she would achieve something as big as that. How could she not? Claire was incredibly talented and intelligent. But what made my heart almost go out through my mouth was when I read the name of the flower: Sassenach.

Mary was right, I had to be at that ball. Claire had used the flower my mother planted in Lallybroch and Forget-me-not to create Sassenach. That could only be a sign that she felt something more for me. Was I going crazy? No, Mary knew something and she knew that we needed to meet. Without thinking about anything else and with my heart racing, I ran to find a suitable outfit for the event and that's when I had an idea that brought a big smile on my face. But what I didn't count on was that my anxiety got in the way of everything! I was so nervous that everything that could go wrong that day, it went wrong. Result? I was late.

I left the cab running like a madman and I knew I was drawing everyone's attention around me, but I didn't care, I needed to see Claire. When I arrived at the big ballroom where the event was being held, I tried to enter discreetly since everyone was sitting and paying attention to what was happening on the big stage. And that's when I saw her. Sassenach! She looked wonderful, with a long red dress that highlighted even more her white skin and brown hair. I stood still for a while, but I needed to sit down, my legs were weak to finally see her. When I turned to look for a free chair, I bumped into a waiter carrying a tray with several glasses of sparkling wine.

A loud noise took over the place and silenced the rest of the room. I felt several looks on me, as well as a big floodlight, but the only thing I could see was my Sassenach looking at me. She seemed confused, but soon a small smile appeared on her lips and I could not help but reciprocate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 😱😱 What an intense chapter!!!! Curious to know what did you think about it!


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take a deep breath, grab some tissues and enjoy this excting chapter! 🤭❤😍

_**POV Claire** _

My legs were shaking when I took a cab to go home. No, it couldn't be true. That's why he hadn't answered my messages or answered my calls. He was very busy in the arms of that damn blonde, the same one he said he would never have anything again, the same one he said that was unbearable, the same one he said that was the complete opposite of me. Yeah, she really was and by the way he liked it. But what did you imagine, Claire? He is single, handsome, why would he be alone? You were just a friend.

When I got home, I realized that my face was wet. I was crying and I hadn't noticed. I sat down on my couch and looked straight ahead, staring at my furniture where my TV was. The furniture that Jamie helped me to assemble, which according to him, I only disturbed him with my attempts to read the manual correctly. That had been his first time in my house and I couldn't help but laugh when I remembered how shocked he had been with the size of my apartment. He really looked like a giant when he was there, not that he really wasn't, but things seemed tiny next to him in that place.

My heart squeezed when I remembered all the nights we spent on this couch talking and laughing, it was on this same couch that he made the proposal to be friends with benefits and it was here that I threw myself on him, scaring him, but soon getting the answer I wanted so much to hear. Now I felt the tears deliberately running down my face when I remembered his smile, the smile that made my whole body tingle and that even if I was very angry, it would break me down in seconds and automatically smile back. And his hug? It was the most comforting thing in the world, in his arms I felt the most secure and important person in the world. He made me feel as if nothing could shake me, he made me feel wanted, he made me feel...loved!

And that's when my eyes widened and I felt as if my heart was going out my mouth, of course I was sad to see Jamie hugged with another woman, of course I was heartbroken knowing that he was not and did not want to be by my side. It was because I was completely in love with my best friend! How could I have been so dumb? In Lallybroch I knew something had changed between us, I knew I couldn't consider him just a friend and that's why hearing his words to Ian hurt so much. And because of my stupidity, I did what I did, said more than I should have, and now I was sitting there in my living room, alone and crying for someone who had no idea how I felt about him.

The worst of all? That person, besides having all my heart in his hands, had something much more important. A part of him in me. A son. I was pregnant and Jamie was the father. Oh my God, I was pregnant and I couldn't even tell the father that I was in love with him! What had I done with my life? What would I do with my life? Now I was crying helplessly, I didn't know if it was sadness, despair or everything together. I was in agony because I felt totally lost and I hadn't felt that way for a long time. But between sobs and more tears, I felt my cell phone vibrating in my pocket and with the hope that it was Jamie answering me, I caught it quickly just to see that it was the hairdresser wanting to confirm my appointment for the next day.

The event! The next day would be the company's gala ball that would finance my hybrid flower project. Not mine, gee, if it wasn't for Sarah I would never have got so far and fulfilled a dream that until one year ago I didn't know I had. Now we would receive a good amount of money besides the prestige of participating in this gala ball and receive an honorable mention on the stage. I was nervous and I needed to be well so as not to act like a fool. I needed to forget everything I was feeling at the moment, I needed to forget, at least for one day, that I was pregnant and that I needed to talk to Jamie. All this would have to wait, I wouldn't be able to be well at the ball and celebrate with Sarah, if I kept crying around.

But it was much harder than saying it. I tried to sort my clothes for the event, but more tears fell when I saw the red dress and remember how Jamie always said I should wear this color more often, which made everyone look at me. What was happening to me? Was it already the damn hormones? Of course not, it was still too early for that! I was sad for the obvious reason that I was pregnant with a person who didn't even care anymore about me, a person who I had no relationship with...and thinking about it brought me more tears. I ended up sleeping in my clothes and everything, clinging to the dress I would wear the next day.

Great Claire! I had to cry like crazy the day before a big event? I woke up with a swollen face, red eyes and looking like my puppy had been run over. When I went down to talk to Mary quickly before leaving to go to the salon to do my hair, she just looked at me with that pity face that I hated, but did not ask me questions and I gave no explanations. The rest of the day passed like a blur, I did everything without realizing what I was doing. Geillis insisted that I get dressed at her house, that she would do my makeup since I had to be perfect that night. She even tried to question why I was looking like I was going to a wake and not to a ball, but when I gave a rude answer, she just laughed and remained silent.

When I arrived at the Hotel Café Royal I was impressed with the beauty of the place. Of course I had passed in front a few times, but I had never entered and noticed its magnificence. It was really a place that justified her fame among celebrities to hold their events. The room that the company had chosen to host the event was not so big, but it was as luxurious as any other place in that hotel. Right at the entrance I met Sarah, who surprised me with a long black dress with some sparkles. I was so used to see her in jeans and a white coat, that seeing her all dressed up only made me realize how much younger she looked than me. Claire, now is not the time to play the poor woman!

She smiled when she saw me and whistled when she got close, praising my whole outfit, just like I praised her too. "We are quite a pair! Now we just need better escorts!" she spoke and laughed as she pointed out to her younger brother who was not far from one of the waiters who was serving some canapés that looked delicious. My escort was not there yet and I was surprised at Mary's lack of punctuality, she was never late and always arrived before me on any appointment, always! And even stranger, she didn't send me any message communicating her delay, but I guess she was busy getting ready, I knew how vain she was.

“Sparkling wine!” I exclaimed as I saw the waiter approaching us with several glasses of that precious liquid.

Sarah and I took a glass to make a toast to our great achievement.

“A toast to our Sassenach!” Sarah said, leaning her glass against mine. A slight squeeze came to my heart at the mention of that name that brought me so many memories, but I was happy to be there with my friend, it really was a great achievement and we needed to celebrate.

When I took a sip of my drink, it snapped and I remembered that I couldn't be drinking. Fuck! Next thing I knew I was spitting the sparkling wine back into my glass, causing my friend to laugh and ask if it was that bad. I tried to smile and say I remembered I was taking a medicine I couldn't mix with alcohol. She laughed again and said that a sip would do no harm, that it would be bad luck to toast and not drink. Yeah, she was right, a sip wouldn't do any harm, now about the bad luck, I think that I was already having it even without the toast.

Soon the president of the company was presented on stage and everyone went to the tables. Sarah and I were called by one of the organizers of the event to go close to the stage because soon they would call all the people chosen to present the new projects to the entrepreneurs who were there. I looked at the door of the hall and no Mary. Could it be that something had happened? I took the cell phone from my purse and there was no message or call. So I decided to send her a message, but when I was starting to write, our names were called.

I didn't consider myself a shy person, but going up on a stage with people looking at you from top to bottom, was not something that made me feel comfortable. Sarah and I stood there while the general manager and creator of the project from which we had been chosen, explained how they got that idea and why we were chosen. What should I do in the meantime? Smile? A big floodlight illuminated us, making it almost impossible to see people sitting at tables. Between one word and another of that Mark, the manager, a noise echoed through the room causing everyone's attention to turn to the direction of the noise, including one of the floodlights.

The first thing that caught my attention was the hair, that tone of red I knew very well, even more so in the way that was even more illuminated under the strong light. And then I saw the kilt, no, it couldn't be. What was Jamie doing there? And dressed like that? He looked like a Scottish warrior who had escaped from a book. My prince charming. Without realizing it, I opened a smile and was rewarded with an even bigger one coming from him. At the same time I wanted to run out and go to him, my legs froze in place and I couldn't move.

Soon people lost interest in what had happened and turned their attention to the speech that was being made on stage. I couldn't see Jamie anymore when the light that was illuminating him was directed to the stage again and as desperate as I was to talk to him, I couldn't get out of there. I ended up turning my attention to what Mark was saying and finally they showed our flower on the big screen. A big smile took over my face. I was proud to hear the applause and even if they had pronounced Sassenach wrong, nothing would make the pride I was feeling disappear. And knowing that Jamie was there, seeing and hearing everything. Did he know the importance he had in all this?

When we were released to leave the stage, I could feel as if I had a thousand butterflies all over my stomach. I was looking like a teenager about to declare her first love. But wasn't that what I was going to do? If it was that simple! I looked at the back of the room and no sign of that bloody Scot, where he had gotten into? Did he regret coming to see me? But did he really come to see me? Of course Claire, why else would he be here? Surely it wasn't because he was interested in the projects! At least not in others that were not his. Now I understood Mary's delay! That smart girl! I had to thank her later and also learn from her to be more observant, clearly I was terrible at that.

I walked as fast as my long dress allowed, looking at all the tables for a red hair. That's when I decided to ask one of the waiters where a giant redhead wearing a kilt was and one of them, who was wearing wet clothes, answered me that he had seen him going towards the rooftop. It's worth to say that he was not happy to have crossed the path with Jamie. I thanked him and went to the elevator. While watching the floors change in front of me, I tried to formulate a speech in my head, a speech that was forgotten as soon as I saw Jamie standing near the railing of the building, admiring the city of London in front of him.

_**POV Jamie** _

After my incident with the waiter and I admiring Claire on stage for a few minutes, some people appeared in front of me, wanting to clean the floor, help the waiter and unfortunately get me out of there. In a not very helpful way, one of the girls who was taking care of the event, practically dragged me to where the bathrooms were, claiming that she just wanted to make sure I was ok. Of course I was! I was even better after seeing Claire on stage, but now I had no idea what was happening because they wouldn't let me go back to the main hall.

When they finally released me, after I showed that nothing had happened but to have my shirt wet by the sparkling wine, I noticed that some people were commenting about the famous rooftop that was near where I was. As I had already lost Claire at that moment, I decided that a little fresh air would help me put my thoughts in place. It had all been so rushed until that moment that I hadn't been able to think about what I would say to her. Of course my intention was to declare my love, what I was feeling, but it would not be as easy as I imagined, even more so after seeing how stunning she looked in that red dress.

While admiring the city of London in front of me, I heard steps behind me and I didn't need to turn around to know who it was. Aye, I was always good of hearing and the way Claire walked I could identify from afar in any situation. I took a deep breath, getting ready to face her after two long months, but before I made any movement, I heard her trembling voice starting to speak low.

“I messed up.” I wanted to interrupt her, I wanted to turn around and say that I had done the same thing, but I think that staying on my back was giving her the courage she needed, so I let her continue even with my heart tightened when I heard her voice like that. “I was scared and screwed up, I know, I said too much and...Jamie, I miss you, every day.”

“I miss ye too.” I confessed, but I knew she wasn't finished. She touched my shoulder delicately, almost not making me feel her apparent nervousness. Then I turned around and we stared at each other intensely for a few seconds.

“I miss your ridiculous jokes, to pick on you for everything and at the same time laugh for the same reasons. Of you scaring me every time with your silent steps and your laughter when I yell at you. I miss my best friend.”

“I also miss my best friend...and having sex with her too.” I said it trying to make her laugh.

“Idiot! But I miss that too...do you want to be my best friend again?” When I was going to agree and finally say what was stuck in my throat, I saw that she smiled shyly and spoke again. “I want my friend back because I fell in love with him.”

It took me a while to understand what she had said. Was she in love with me? Was that it? I knew she cared about me, that she had some attraction for me, but I didn't think I would hear those words coming out of her mouth, at least not at that moment. I must have looked scared because I saw Claire started to shrug her shoulders, as if she wanted to hide from the world, but mainly from me. How stupid I was, I was thinking about so many things that I didn't say anything after her statement.

“Claire.” I whispered her name while approaching her, putting my hand shyly on her face. She made a small sound and closed her eyes. “I also fell in love with my best friend, I just wasn't smart enough to notice it before...”

She raised her head that was low, leaning on my hand and looked at me a little amazed. But soon her features relaxed when she saw me smiling and this gave me the courage to get even closer to her and hug her tightly. How I missed having her in my arms, how I missed her smell, her skin against mine, her hands caressing my neck and being able to fit her in my chest, exactly where she belonged. With my chin resting on her head, I let go the breath I didn't even know I was holding. I felt the same relief in Claire's body, she was relaxing in my arms and this made me the happiest man in the world.

“But what about Laoghaire?” Claire asked, her muffled voice for leaning against my chest.

“Laoghaire?” I asked confused, what did she have to do with all this?

“Yes, your ex and maybe current... I don't know, you seemed very intimate in front of your building yesterday...” I noticed that her voice was getting more altered, almost irritated.

Yesterday? Had she seen me? And that's when it all came together! The missed calls, the message she needed to talk to me and was going home! And of course she must have appeared right at the time that crazy woman was trying to attack me, but why didn't I see her? Oh, of course, Laoghaire surely saw Claire and did everything she did with that silly smile on her face. How had I been so naive?

“She's just my ex and a very annoying one who definitely doesn't ken what the word no means!”

“From what I saw, you didn't seem to know either.”

“Claire.” I was serious, lifting her face so she could look me in the eye. “Yesterday I was getting myself drunk in a bar because I had finally realized that I was hopelessly in love with ye and I thought I had lost ye...” I saw that she widened her eyes. “And when I was walking home, I had the misfortune to meet Laoghaire who even after I said in all the ways I wanted to be alone, accompanied me to my apartment wanting to keep me company. Ye ken how insistent she can be.”

Claire just rolled her eyes and leaned her head back on my chest, squeezing our hug, as if she wanted to make sure I wouldn't disappear from there, that I was hers now. If she knew I wouldn't go anywhere without her by my side.

“But what were ye doing there? What was the urgent conversation?” I questioned her and felt her getting tense under my arms. “When I saw yer message I tried to call ye, but ye didna answer and then I ended up sleeping.”

She was silent and her fingers started to draw a picture on my back. I knew she was nervous about something, but what else did she have to tell me besides confessing that she was in love with me? Was she with someone else? Is that why she questioned about Laoghaire? Frank? No, it couldn't be. Now it was my body that was tense.

“Claire?” I repeated her name with the hope that it would finally make her talk.

I noticed she was looking for something in her pocket, yes, her dress had a pocket. Of course, it had to be something practical and like her! Finally she seemed satisfied in finding what she was looking for, her cell phone.

“The other day I was trying to sleep and I couldn't, so I decided to put the playlist I had created for nights like these and that's when I noticed that the last time I had listened to these same songs was on our last night in Lallybroch.” She stopped talking and took a deep breath. "Could the gentleman in kilt grant a dance for this completely uncoordinated lady?"

I laughed and took her hand, bowing. She placed her cell phone on a small table there and the music started to play. It didn't take much for me to recognize. It was the music I had put on to play the last time we spent a night together. The last time we had sex, but the first time we made love. Yes, it was that night that everything changed between us, but we were too stubborn to accept and understand what had happened.

**_I'd go hungry_ ** **_  
I'd go black and blue  
I'd go crawling  
Down the avenue  
No, there's nothing  
That I wouldn't do  
To make you feel my love_ **

“When I heard this song again, I couldn't help but remember you, our night together and how the lyrics made sense. Now I know how right the words are.” As she spoke, we moved slowly to the rhythm of the song. “I would do anything for you to feel my love, even more so because now it's not just me who needs your affection...” and then she put my hands on her belly.

At the same moment I stopped moving. My hands were starting to sweat and I stared at her with my eyes wide open. I had understood right? Claire's look was nervous, as was her small smile at me. Yes, she nodded her head as if she had heard my question out loud, I had really understood correctly. She was pregnant! I would be a father! We would be parents! We would have a child together! My heart was pounding, my head was confused, how had this happened? No, I knew how it had happened, but when?

“Jamie?” Claire's voice made me turn my attention to the wonderful woman in front of me, the mother of my son, the woman I loved and who I knew would make me the happiest man in the world.

Without saying anything, I knelt down in front of her and felt a small sigh coming from her.

“Calm down Sassenach, I'm not asking ye to marry me, not yet...” I laughed when I felt her sigh again, now in the form of relief. “Hey my little one.” I spoke approaching Claire's belly. “I ken I was a little absent father until now and I dinna want ye to blame yer mother for that, we are both very stubborn! But now that I ken of yer existence, I won't leave yer side even one day...and also because I found out that I can't live without yer mother, she is the most important person in my life, I mean, after ye! I love ye leannan!” And I kissed Claire's belly.

I felt the tremor in her body and got up quickly. I saw that she was crying and I didn't think twice before hugging her tight.

“Jamie...” her voice came out between sobs. “Why do you have to be like that? Like a prince charming coming straight from books?”

“I am not a Prince Charming Sassenach, and remember when I said I couldna imagine ye waiting for one? I'm just a man in love with my girls!”

“Girls? And how are you so sure that it's not a boy?”

“In the same way I always knew that ye would not resist my Scottish charm!”

“Idiot!” she hit me lightly on the shoulder and we laughed.

But soon the laughter was over and we were silent, one facing the other with an admiration never noticed before. I wiped the last tears that still ran down her face and approached my mouth to hers.

“Sassenach...I would very much like to kiss ye, may I?” I whispered the words that I already knew the answer.

She just agreed with her head, already closing her eyes to receive my kiss. And that was the first time I kissed the woman I knew would be the last one. All the other times we kissed had been hurried, hidden and in a way, forbidden. But not now, now we were sure that we no longer wanted to hide our love from anyone, that it was right and that we had all the time in the world to appreciate each other's affection. When we needed to get away to breathe, I heard Claire whispering.

“I love you, Jamie Fraser.”

“I love ye, Sassenach.”


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special chapter for you in a very special day for me. Today is my birthday and I really hope you like my present ❤❤

_**POV Claire** _

Being there in Jamie's arms was something that I didn't think would happen anytime soon, and if it ever would. But now we were hugging, still trying to recover from everything that had been said and also from the kisses that were not few and much less without intensity. We had done this before, but before it was just a momentary desire, something that led us to sex without commitment, or what we thought was without commitment. Except that everything had changed, what we felt for each other, the willingness to show it all with gestures and words. Even with all the safety that Jamie brought me, I still worried about everything that would happen from then on, would I be able to handle it?

“Dinna fash Sassenach, we'll figure it all out together.” Jamie spoke while placing several kisses on my hair.

“But how? Was I saying that out loud?” I looked at him confused and he laughed.

“No, but I ken ye, and I ken that when ye stand still and that vein in yer forehead pops out, it's because ye're worried about how to solve some problem!”

“Sometimes I hate how well you know me! But Jamie, how can you be sure that everything will work out? I have no idea how to be a mother! And I don't even know if you'll be a good father, if we'll be good enough together!”

“Och, Sassenach, where are those declarations of love from minutes ago? We've been together for less than an hour and ye're already doubting us as a couple?”

“It's not that, Jamie, it's just that there is so much new stuff going on and I don't know if I can handle it all and...” but he didn't let me finish speaking, kissing me to silence me.

“Tell ye what, ye go back to yer party while I go apologize to the waiter who is not very happy with me. We'll meet at yer table because I'm sure ye won't want to miss dinner, after all ye have to eat for two now.” he smiled and before letting me answer, kissed me and squeezed my buttocks lightly, causing me to gasp in surprise. “Sassenach, ye need to get used to this, did I mention that this is my favorite part of yer body?”

“I can say the same for you, especially after seeing you in a kilt...” and after that I walked laughing toward the elevator. This was the first time I had ever seen Jamie red with embarrassment.

When we got down to the main hall, we headed off in different directions and I went after my friend Sarah. She was probably planning to kill me, I had left her alone after we got off the stage and had given no explanation. I knew that she didn't like to talk to strangers, in this case all the people who were present in the place. Her brother who had gone along was not the company she imagined spending the whole evening with. I soon saw her sitting at our table, her face was comical, I knew she was trying to pretend to be interested in what the lady next to her was saying, but those who knew her, recognized very well how much she hated that conversation.

When I sat down in the vacant chair next to her, I felt relief take over her body. She quickly dismissed the poor lady by saying that her partner had finally arrived and she had to update me on everything that had happened, that she missed me. Of course, the lady understood what my friend was implying and with a wry smile, she greeted me and then turned the other way in search of new company for her conversation. I just laughed when Sarah took a relieved breath and confessed that she could no longer stand to hear about the millionaire conquests of the woman's husband.

“Sarah, her husband may be one of the people who has donated money to our research!”

“The money is already given, that doesn't oblige me to be nice to her!” I ended up laughing more and not saying anything else. “And Beauchamp, may I know where the hell have you been? From your smudged red lipstick, I'm sure you were with someone... securing more sponsors for our project?”

“What? Of course not!” and I rushed to get my cell phone to see my face. “I really need to change my lipstick, this one was definitely false advertising when it promised a matte effect that wouldn't come off!”

“You really need to change it if you don't want to give away what you were doing...” and she stopped talking just as I felt Jamie's hand on my shoulder. “I guess this must be the reason for your disappearance, right? Or there's someone else with the same problem with your lipstick...”

When I looked at Jamie, I saw that his lips were as red as mine. Yeah, I guess I shouldn't wear red lipstick anymore, not that we had anything to hide, but I didn't want to look like a clown every time I went out with him.

“Sarah, this is Jamie, my...my...” what was he? Father of my child? Best friend? Lover? Prince Charming...argh, cheesiest thing ever Claire!

“Boyfriend! Jamie Fraser!” he completed my sentence and stretched out his hand to greet my friend who laughed when she saw the look on my face when I heard those words.

Of course he was my boyfriend! Although there was no official proposal, not that it needed to happen either, we had already skipped some steps and started this relationship in a totally non-traditional way. But who said we needed to be traditional? What mattered was how we felt about each other and this was very clear between us. And Sarah didn't seem to mind at all with Jamie's presence there and soon the two of them were talking animatedly, even more when it was to make fun of me. I concentrated more on the food that was being served, which was delicious, and tried to ignore the many glasses of wine that passed in front of me.

When dessert was served and I had stolen most of what was on Jamie's plate, we decided that the night was over. I couldn't wait to get rid of the heel that was killing me and finally relax. The fact that I had cried like a baby the day before and earlier that night also contributed to my desire to leave, of course in good company! But as I was walking to the hotel exit after saying goodbye to Sarah, Jamie pulled me to the opposite direction.

“Jamie! Where are we going? As far as I know the exit is that way!” I said as I pointed to the big door of the hotel.

“We're not leaving.”

“But I want to!” I knew I was sounding like a spoiled child complaining, but my feet were really killing me.

“Dinna fash Sassenach, ye'll relax like never before tonight!” he smiled naughtily at me as he led me to the hotel elevator. “Ye deserve a perfect evening tonight and we wouldn't have that at my place, much less yers!” and showed me the key that was in his hand.

“Jamie! Are you crazy? It must be ridiculously expensive to get a room here!”

“I won't say it's cheap, but I have my savings and my girls deserve the best!”

And there I was crying again! Well, people are right about hormones in pregnancy!

“No need to cry...I'll tell ye a secret.” he whispered in my ear as he hugged me. “This is the cheapest room they had.” I ended up laughing, only Jamie could make me cry and laugh at the same time!

We got to the room that was on the third floor, which according to him, the lower the floor, the cheaper it was. But when he opened the door, I could see that even though it was the cheapest room in the hotel, it was one of the most beautiful I had ever seen. I don't know if they did this for all couples, but the floor and the bed was covered with rose petals. On the table next to the bed, there was a bucket with two bottles that I couldn't identify and some strawberries beside it. On the bed there were several chocolates that formed a heart, but what amazed me the most was that it was my favorite chocolate. The red Lindt.

“I can tell ye that the chocolates were a bit of work, but with a little encouragement, they made sure to look for the nearest store at this hour that sold yer favorite chocolate!” Jamie spoke into my ear as he hugged me from behind and rested his chin on my shoulder.

“Jamie...that's...I never knew you could be this romantic! And pay attention to all the nonsense I say!”

“They were never nonsense to me Sassenach! And I dinna usually show this side of myself to just anyone, and theoretically ye were just my friend until a few hours ago!” he laughed and nibbled on my ear.

“May I know what my BOYFRIEND” I emphasized the word and couldn't help but smile when I heard myself say it for the first time. “chose for us to drink tonight?”

“The best apple juice in England! And that only ye like to drink!” he frowned, I knew how he hated this juice, I used to listen to his indignation every time I made him buy it for me. “And as much as I love ye, I needed something stronger after this intense night! Sassenach, please dinna think that I'm not bursting with happiness over the news ye told me, but that doesn't make me any less nervous...”

“Ahh, so it's not just me! Where's the confidence in both of us, Fraser?” I tapped him lightly on the arm while he poured me a glass of juice and him a shot of whisky.

“I have confidence in both of us, but that doesn't mean that I'm not anxious about everything that lies ahead!”

“What matters is that we are no longer alone, right?”

“No, now there are two of us...I mean three!” and with a broad smile on our faces, we toast this new stage of our lives.

“Hum, I was just thinking, is it true what they say about what the Scots wear under their kilts?” I said, raising an eyebrow and staring at my boyfriend.

“Why dinna you come over here and find out?” with a naughty smile, he pulled me closer to him.

Yeah, I was really enjoying this new stage of our lives!

_**POV Jamie** _

Did that night go as planned? Of course it didn't! When I rushed into that hotel hoping to see Claire, the most I thought would happen was that I would get to talk to her and try not to make a fool of myself by telling her that I was in love with my best friend. But what happened was something that never crossed my mind, not even in my wildest dreams.

Claire was in love with me too, she loves me with the same intensity that I love her. But this was nowhere near the most exciting news of the evening, although it was already wonderful. She was pregnant! We were going to have a child together! I was going to be a father! In one day my life was radically transformed, before Claire came into my life, I thought I would never find any meaning in everything I did. I was without a job, away from my family and without any prospects for my future, but now I knew I was headed in the right direction. Because of Claire, I realized that I could do more than I ever imagined, because of her I had reconnected with my family, and now I was investing in a business that was always meant to be mine.

That doesn't mean that I wasn't scared of the changes that would happen in the coming months. I have always loved my nephews, but being a father is something totally new to me and something I didn't foresee happening so soon in my life. But who says that things always happen the way we want them to? Every now and then we need these "shocks" to see what really matters in our lives and what we should give priority to, and at the moment my priority was Claire and our little family. Christ! In a few months we would be a family! Who would have thought I would be so lucky when I agreed to be a delivery boy for a small flower shop? 

Now she was there, in my arms and totally surrendered to what she was feeling for me. We spent some time just hugging after an intense exchange of kisses and her questioning me about what I was wearing under my kilt. Even though I had an immense desire to taste my Sassenach even more, I was worried, she was pregnant, could I do with her everything that was on my mind? As if to read my thoughts, Claire abruptly pulled away from my arms and stared at me for a few seconds.

“Take off your clothes!” she ordered with a serious look on her face. “I want to look at you.” and a naughty smile appeared on her face.

I spent a few seconds trying to digest her words, but when I saw her serious expression and her crossed arms staring straight at me, I knew she wanted me to do what she was asking. Okay, I'm enjoying this new side of Claire, a side that I clearly didn't know very well yet. Our interactions at sex time had always been casual and noncommittal, we never noticed each other's bodies much, it was something not even considered to be done between friends. With a simple movement, I unbuckled the belt that held my kilt in place and it ended up on the floor. I took off my shirt just as easily, without bothering to unbutton all the buttons correctly.

I felt her piercing gaze on my body and I couldn't contain the small smile as I heard her sigh. "So it's true what they say about the Scots and wearing the kilt..." she said as she came closer to me. Soon her hands were gently running over my arms, back and when she gave my ass a gentle squeeze I couldn't hold back a small sigh that came out of my mouth and caused her to let out a small laugh. My heart started to race as soon as her hands started to get close to an area that I couldn't bear to stand still if she touched it. But she deliberately ignored it, and I let out the breath I didn't even know I was holding.

“Are ye disappointed?” I asked as I saw her still staring at me.

“Not at all! But I already knew that would never happen...”

“Well then, fair is fair, take off yers.”

She raised one of her eyebrows and, seeing me smile, started to unzip her dress. She, unlike me, took her time to remove her clothes, making this moment almost torture for me. And I knew she was enjoying the look of desperation on my face as the strap of the dress slowly fell down her shoulders. When it finally hit the bedroom floor, I couldn't contain the small grunt that came out of my mouth when I saw that she was wearing only a small black lace panty, and how small it was! With a naughty smile, she lowered the little piece down her legs, almost doing a dance. If she hadn't known by then what she was doing to me, I was sure that now she had no more doubts.

I stared at her for a while, noticing every detail of her body. Her breasts seemed to be fuller than normal, a clear sign of pregnancy, but which only made her even more wonderful. Her skin was so fair that I could see all her veins, and I followed my gaze up to her long legs, legs that I loved to have around my body. Just like her, I approached her slowly and ran my hands delicately over each part of her body until I got to where I liked the most. Her round and perfectly sized ass, which fit in my hands, was the place where she definitely belonged. As I squeezed it, I heard a small moan from her and cracked a satisfied smile.

“Now I'm asking, were you disappointed?” she spoke in a slightly weak voice as I squeezed her waist and brought my mouth close to her neck.

“Claire, ye are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.” and I kissed her neck, biting it lightly.

“I guess you haven't seen much...” her voice was broken.

“What matters is the one in front of me now, she may not have been the first, but she'll be the last one I see this way...and the most important.”

And without giving her time to answer me, I quickly turned her around and captured her in a violent and intense kiss. I couldn't be gentle at that moment, but she responded just the same, biting my lower lip so hard that I tasted blood. But this only made me pull her closer to me, one hand pulling her hair tightly and the other squeezing her ass. Claire's hands were also exploring me with the same ferocity, scratching my back and further increasing my desire to possess her without any delicacy. Her legs soon went around my waist and holding her firmly against my body, I placed her on the bed.

I took a step back to observe the beauty of this woman who was totally surrendered to me and happy with it. Her eyes stared at me with pure desire and without further ado, I began to trail kisses from her foot to her center, the place where I knew I brought her much pleasure, the place where I could taste her and satisfy myself almost completely. As my tongue worked with intensity, my hands brought her closer, squeezing so hard on her hips that I knew it would leave marks. I could feel her response between moans of my name and her body lifting off the bed, causing me to go even deeper into her. It didn't take long for her to reach her first climax of the night, but I knew very well that there would be many more to come.

When I approached her face, her eyes were closed and her mouth half open. That only increased my desire to be inside her and I couldn't wait any longer. Positioning myself between her legs, I kissed and nibbled her breasts, but felt her impatience as she lifted her hips against mine.

“Jamie...do it soon and don't be gentle!” she said almost like an order.

“But what about the baby?” I asked worriedly.

“Still the size of a pea, it won't feel a thing...Now stop talking Jamie, I want you inside me and it has to be now!”

And with that she arched her back and pulled me hard against her. I penetrated her all at once and we both sighed. As she had requested, I was not gentle and even less calm. Even though I wanted to slowly savor this moment, the desire I felt to go deeper and deeper prevented me from going slowly. Hearing Claire's moans and desperate pleas to go faster didn't help either. But that was not the moment to be delicate, that was the moment we had waited for so long, the moment we finally gave ourselves completely to each other. That was the moment that confirmed what we felt, both lust and in love. Nothing in my life had ever been so intense and so delicious. With each thrust I felt as if my body joined Claire's in a way I didn't know was possible.

I knew she was close, I felt her squeezing me, her breathing was rapid as was her heart. And then I kissed her eagerly. "Come with me, Sassenach," I whispered in her ear. And then I felt her body trembling under mine, her moans coming and going, my name being repeated over and over again. It didn't take long for me to reach my own orgasm, and then it was my turn to babble her name between moans of intense pleasure. How could she do this to me? How did she have this power? The only thing we could hear in the room now was our altered breathing, both of us trying to catch our breath as we sighed with pleasure.

Unable to keep her off me, I pulled Claire to lie on my chest, her head seeming to fit perfectly there. Her legs entwined with mine and her hands caressing me. I didn't need anything else in my life to be happy. At that moment I was sure that I had made the right choice in going after her at the hotel, I was sure that I had found the love of my life in my best friend.

“Ye are the best thing that ever happened in my life, Sassenach...ye may not have been the first woman I ever kissed, but I swear ye will be the last...”


	24. Chapter 24

_**POV Claire** _

What a perfect night! That was the only word that came to mind to describe everything that had happened in the last few hours. Although I never believed that perfection existed, what Jamie and I shared was very close, something that I never in my wildest dreams would have believed could happen. Who knew that Jamie Fraser was such a romantic man! But who was I kidding? I always saw in his actions a total devotion to those he loved, and now I can say that I am one of those people to whom he devotes all his attention and care. Could I be any luckier than that?

The night had been intense, but I still lost sleep in the early hours of the morning. When I opened my eyes, I saw that red hair on my chest, and I couldn't stop smiling as I remembered all that we had done. After the first time we had made love, yes, first time, because before all we had done was just sex. But now everything had changed and I can't even describe all that I felt having him inside me this time. The second, and yes, third time, were calmer, savoring every moment and piece of each other's body with extreme devotion.

I felt a slight burning sensation between my legs, but I couldn't complain, despite all his size, Jamie could be the most gentle lover when he wanted to be. The problem was that this urge didn't come often. I laughed softly as I remembered my relentless pleas for him not to stop and to go faster and harder, even though he claimed he didn't want to hurt me or our daughter. Who could resist such a concerned man like that? But after I lost my temper by claiming that I was not made of glass and that our baby would never feel a thing, Jamie let loose and showed that he really did look like a Viking warrior!

I turned to the side and started watching my little big prince charming. He really did look like he was straight out of a fairy tale book, something I thought didn't exist in the real world, but Jamie was beginning to prove me wrong. Not that he didn't have flaws, and I knew I was about to discover several, but for now I was more than content to admire and sigh at all his qualities. And one of them was his undeniable beauty. How come I never stopped to notice this before? Not that I thought he was ugly when he was just a friend, he had always caught my attention, but now that I noticed all the details, I saw that he looked as if he had been sculpted, a real Greek God. Argh, I already looked like a lovesick girlfriend on the very first day.

But how could I avoid seeing that copper-colored hair, with a few locks lighter and with curls more beautiful and silky than mine? His nose was long and thin, but totally proportional to his square and masculine face. His cat-like eyes, now closed, hid a shade of blue that was as intense as the ocean. His long eyelashes, which had blond roots, made many women, including me, envious. And his mouth? It was wide and the corner of his lips was always on the verge of a smile, and what a smile, the most enchanting one in the world that always made my legs weak. I couldn't resist just admiring it, and gently began to run my fingers through his hair and down his face. When I reached his lips, I was greeted with a smile that for a minute I thought he had woken up, but his breathing showed me that he was still asleep and I was delighted to know that Jamie was happy in his dreams.

Of course I couldn't forget his body, which possessed a strength I already knew well and which made me the happiest woman in the world. And sore too, at that moment. I laughed as I thought about it. I never thought I would fall in love with a man with more muscles than I could count. All my boyfriends had always been thin, slender, and intellectual. Now Jamie was the total opposite. He was tall, very tall, with broad shoulders and unequaled strength. But that didn't make him any less endearing or intelligent. He really was a complete package and mine! My fingers now trailed down his abdomen and were soon near that V that led to a part of his anatomy that seemed very awake at that moment.

“Happy with what ye see?” Jamie's husky voice snapped me out of my trance, making me jump on the bed;

“Jesus Christ! Even sleeping you scare me!”

“A little hard to sleep with yer hand dangerously close to sensitive places... but I didna want to interrupt, ye can continue yer inspection!” he said with a naughty smile on his face.

“Now it's no longer funny, I was going to surprise you with a different kind of good morning.”

“Ye can still surprise me, believe me!”

“No, I lost the will after that scare!”

“Sassenach!” he whined like a child, and I laughed.

“I was thinking of ordering breakfast.”

“I already have my breakfast here and it's very English!” and with an absurd agility for someone who had just woken up, he pulled me on top of him, putting one of my legs on each side of his body.

“Hmmm...” and that was all I could say as I felt my body rubbing against his. “I'm sore, Jamie.”

“I promise to be gentle.” he babbled as he nibbled on my breasts. Of course he was as gentle as a man over six feet tall could be.

After we showered, separately, otherwise we would never be able to complete this task, we finally ordered breakfast in the bedroom. I was starving to death and was thankful that until now I had not suffered from morning sickness, going without my precious coffee was already a huge sacrifice for me. I was lucky that I had a person by my side who could make my bad mood practically nonexistent by waking up early without caffeine. We sat on the bed for a few minutes just savoring the delicacies served by that wonderful hotel, but soon Jamie started questioning me about my hybrid flower project and seeing the sparkle in his eyes when he heard my words made me once again the happiest woman in the world.

“And what have you been doing for the two months we haven't spoken? Just to let you know, the delivery guy you recommended is very efficient, but he doesn't speak more than necessary, and it's so strange not to have a person irritating us constantly!”

“And that's great! I wouldna recommend someone who is there hitting on the owner of the flower shop! He is there to work and that's it!”

“Hm, so you mean you've never been there just to work?”

“Of course not, Sassenach! When I saw yer whisky-colored eyes I knew I was completely lost, only at the time I was too dumb to realize that I was standing in front of the woman of my life!” And leaving me with tears in my eyes, he kissed me gently.

“And I thought that Mary was the one who would cause trouble when I heard her sighing when she saw you for the first time.” Why couldn't I control the tears that insisted on falling?

“Come here...” he said and pulled me between his legs, making me rest my head on his chest.

We stayed like this for a few minutes, just feeling each other's breathing and this calmed me down immensely. I pulled away from his body and tried to open a smile to show him that I was fine, that everything was just a result of the little being that was growing inside my belly, but I didn't need to make an effort, Jamie's hand instinctively went to my belly and it was his wide smile that assured me once again that everything was fine and that he understood my sudden emotion.

“But to answer yer first question, in those two months besides trying desperately to forget ye, something that obviously didn't happen...” I gave him a weak smile and he just patted my arm in response. “I jumped on a crazy and somewhat ambitious idea to expand the family business. We are about to open a second distillery here in London, I even managed to get Ian to come here to see how everything is going...Christ! I forgot Ian!”

I was still digesting everything he had said when Jamie quickly got out of bed to look for something on the table, and of course it was his cell phone. As he took the phone in hand, his eyes widened and I heard little mutterings in Gaelic that I knew were not decent words to say in English. He returned to the bed after typing something and smiled at me, as if nothing had happened.

“You did all this in just two months? You? Who didn't want to get involved in the family business? Jamie! This is fantastic! Expanding the business here in London is a huge step, but I know you have the capacity for it, I always knew you would be great for the distillery!” I couldn't hide my pride for this man, and I hugged him tightly, kissing him all over the face and making him laugh.

“It's nothing like the creation of a new species of flower, but at least my sister is no longer on my back, on the contrary, I have managed to silence, at least for a while, the uncontrollable Jenny Murray!” I couldn't help laughing when I heard him talking about his sister.

“Stop thinking that what you did is no big deal, I'm sure your father would be very proud of you, in fact he is.” And as I caressed his face, I saw his eyes fill with tears.

I flooded him with questions about the distillery, what had already been done, the plans for the inauguration, and my smile only grew as I saw him answer everything with an excitement I had only seen before when we were in Scotland. He had really made the right choice in taking some of the reins of the family business that now more than ever seemed to have been made for him. While he was explaining some of the procedures involved in building a distillery, his cell phone started ringing and even though he tried to ignore it, the person was being insistent. When he finally answered, I found out that it was Ian, and from Jamie's short answers, I knew that the bubble we were living in would soon be burst. We would have to get back to the real world.

“Sassenach, as much as I want to ignore my brother-in-law and spend the rest of my day with ye in this bed, I'm going to have to go to the distillery to work out the last details, after all that's what Ian came here for and I ended up forgetting him in a hotel room two days ago.” he laughed as he saw my surprised face.

“How could you forget Ian?”

“Yer fault and all his motivational speech... if it wasn't for Ian's push, I would never understand that all the sadness I was feeling about being away from ye was because I was hopelessly in love with my best friend.” and started to get dressed as if he hadn't said much.

“So I have Ian to thank? Even though he is now hating me?”

“He's not angry with ye Sassenach, he doesn't ken that I'm with ye, I'd rather tell him in person later.”

“Speaking of telling him everything... Jamie, I think it's better if we wait to tell him about the pregnancy, I am not yet three months along and you know the risks of every early pregnancy...” I said this almost in a whisper, I didn't like to think that something could go wrong.

He stopped dressing and approached me. I was sitting on the end of the bed and he lifted me up so that he could hug me.

“I ken, but I'm sure everything will work out and soon we'll see that belly start to show....” he spoke with one of his hands on my belly. “I promise not to tell anyone until we are one hundred percent sure that our little one is out of any danger.”

I mumbled a thank you as I sank my face into his chest. He took a deep breath and kissed my forehead. I knew I needed to get back to my routine, my shop, my work, but it felt so good to be there with him. I had to stop thinking that this wasn't real, that he would be out of my life as soon as we set foot outside that room. Claire, he loves you, he said he's your boyfriend, he's the father of your child, he's not going anywhere. A few minutes later we were both ready and headed for the elevator.

“How nice that everyone will know that we spent the night together....” I said as I pointed to our clothes, the same as at the gala ball.

“Sassenach, that's usually what everyone expects when we go to a room together.” he replied, laughing.

“Idiot! You know what I mean.”

“I have no shame in showing that I spent the night with ye, ye're mine and to hell with what people think!”

“Well, better to leave the room in the same clothes as the day before than in a bar restroom with smeared lipstick...we've improved, haven't we?”

He laughed and as soon as the elevator door opened, he took my hand and we left like this, as a real couple for the first time to the rest of the world.

_**POV Jamie** _

As we left the hotel, I insisted that Claire come with me to the distillery, I wasn't ready to be away from her, but she insisted that she needed to go home, that she needed to see how the flower shop was doing and that she would be a distraction for me. She was not wrong, it would really be hard to concentrate on work with everything that had happened in the last few hours, but it was going to happen anyway, with her near or far away from me. I finally stopped insisting after I made her promise to come to my place right after the flower shop closes.

I quickly went home to change and get my bike. This time Ian preferred to take a cab to the distillery, not wanting to risk riding on his favorite means of transportation again. Of course he was ironic when he told me this on the phone, even more so because he was still annoyed that I had disappeared for the last 24 hours, leaving him alone to solve some unfinished business in a city somewhat unknown to him. I knew that he would forgive me when he knew the reason for my disappearance, after all, that was all he wanted to happen when he gave me that advice in the bar, wasn't it? Well, I hoped so. And I suspected that he liked Claire more than I did.

I arrived at the place where the construction of our business was being finished and Ian was already there talking to one of the engineers responsible for everything. It was almost finished and we were already organizing the opening event. John Grey wanted to do something big to show his friends and investor acquaintances that he was not kidding around when he put money into this small Scottish distillery. I still wasn't completely sure that we were ready for something of such magnitude, but I couldn't say this to the person who had invested a very large amount of money in my business, one that I claimed would give him a return on such an expenditure.

After we had talked to everyone we needed to, Ian finally asked me why I had disappeared and what I was thinking of leaving him in charge of things that were out of his hands.

“I was just following yer advice....” I replied with a silly smile on my face.

“What advice?” Ian asked me confused. “I advise ye on so many things that I can't keep track of what ye do or dinna follow.” I elbowed him lightly and he laughed.

“About Claire! I was with her, that's why I disappeared. But as much as I hate to admit it, ye were right! She feels the same way I do, but was afraid to admit it.” I started to tell him everything that had happened from the time I left the bar that day until I went after her at the ball.

Ian listened to me with a smile on his face, but I knew that that smile contained more than just happiness for me, the bastard was satisfied that he had always been right about both of us, and in the end we laughed together at how innocent I had been to think that between me and her it was just a simple friendship. But it wasn't just that. I wanted to say loud and clear that I was going to be a father, that I felt like the happiest man in the world because of this, that while fear took over my body, the joy of starting a family with my Sassenach overcame any apprehension. Only I couldn't say anything, I had promised Claire, and I took a deep breath as I listened to Ian brag about how he was so much better than Jenny at bringing couples together.

“I can't wait to tell Jenny that she lost the bet, she swore ye guys were going to take forever....”

“I'm going to be a FATHER!” I shouted the words interrupting Ian's speech. Fuck! What kind of self-control was this Fraser? Claire is going to kill you!

Ian was silent. I could see that he was trying to say something, but nothing was coming out of his mouth. He started to blink non-stop. Was he having a stroke? Was I not supposed to be like this? After all, I was going to be a father, and I had just broken the first promise I had made to my girlfriend.

“Are ye going to...? What? Father? I...” my brother-in-law stuttered, something unheard of coming from him, I had only seen him like this once before and that was when he learned that he was going to be a father for the fourth time.

“Claire is going to kill me for letting it slip, but aye, Ian! Not only did I find out last night that she was in love with me, but I also found out that she is pregnant! Can ye imagine that? Not only do I have the love of my life by my side, but we are going to start a family! I ken this is not the right order of things, after all, we haven't even started dating properly, but it doesn't matter! I am feeling so many things that I can't explain...I...”

But before I could continue, Ian hugged me tightly, seeming to have snapped out of his trance, and I laughed with his enthusiasm. As we pulled away, I saw that he was trying to cover the emotion evident on his face, which made me smile even wider. We had always been a family that never worried about disguising our feelings for each other, we were always honest and never failed to speak our minds. This was not always good, especially when it came to my relationship with my sister.

“I have to confess that I didn't imagine I would be an uncle so soon, but I can see how happy Claire makes ye...and who cares about the order of things? What matters is how ye feel about each other and even though I've only seen a little of yer interaction, I ken ye have plenty of love to start a life together.”

“I ken that we still have many things to figure out as a couple, but we are in this together and I dinna intend to run away from any responsibility. And Ian, when did ye get so good at these motivational speeches? Have ye been reading Jenny's books? The books she's never read?” we both laughed. “Speaking of Jenny, dinna tell her anything, Claire will kill me if she finds out I told ye, and we ken Jenny can't keep quiet, in less than two hours the whole Lallybroch will know...”

“Jamie, ye ken yer sister, I'm not going...”

“Yes, ye will! Even more so after I found out that ye made a bet on my relationship with Claire!”

He laughed and we continued talking about how my life would change in the coming months. I felt so much lighter after sharing everything I was feeling with Ian, he has always been my best friend and advisor, I couldn't imagine leaving him out at such an important moment in my life as this one. After we worked some more and had a quick snack nearby, Ian said that he needed to go to the hotel to pack his things, as he would be catching the last train of the day to Edinburgh. I knew that he wanted to see Claire before he left, so I invited him home for dinner, but I made him promise several times that he would not say anything about the pregnancy.

I knew that Claire had said she would come to my house as soon as the shop closed, but I also knew that I couldn't wait until then. So as soon as I said goodbye to Ian, I got on my motorcycle and rode to a destination that was already well known to me and that brought back great memories. As I entered the flower shop, Mary smiled at me and I couldn't help but shy away, feeling the tips of my ears warm up. Yes, for the first time the roles were reversed.

“Claire is in the back handing the last orders of the day to the new delivery guy.” she told me before I could ask any questions.

I thanked her with a smile and still couldn't understand why I was embarrassed of Mary, probably because Claire hadn't told her yet, or had she? Not that she needed to, it was clear that Mary had always known what was going on between us. I decided to go after my girlfriend, but as soon as I started walking, I heard Claire's voice coming towards me.

“Is this the new delivery guy?” I asked, trying to keep my voice down.

“Yes, he's the one you recommended, don't you remember him?” Mary asked with a hint of curiosity.

“Of course I do, but he wasn't like this a year ago…” I said as I watched the man talking to Claire. He wasn't so strong or worn such tight clothes...my thoughts were interrupted by Mary's laughter.

“Don't worry, Claire thinks he's boring, they don't exchange more than a few words a day.”

“I'm not worried, it's just that I noticed he was different, that's all.”

“Of course” and this was the first time I heard Mary being ironic with me and having fun with it. Yes, things had changed around here, but I couldn't help but laugh at her boldness.

Soon the delivery guy left to do his job and Claire finally saw me standing there. I walked up to her and kissed her in a way she clearly wasn't expecting, but I missed her and also wanted to show her how much I loved her. It had nothing to do with the strong guy she had been talking to until now, nothing! As we pulled away, I saw that she was red in the face and looking directly at where Mary was sitting. I had probably made them both uncomfortable, but I didn't really care at the moment.

“Jamie, I told you I was going to your place, we're almost done here.”

“But I wasn't busy and I wanted to see my girlfriend again, is that okay?”

“Of course it is, you're just being exaggerated, we saw each other this morning...” she said this with a smile on her face and I knew what she was remembering.

“I'm sure Mary wouldna mind closing up shop by herself, would ye, Mary?”

“Of course not! You can go have fun! Claire has been talking about you all day, out of ten words, nine were Jamie, I know she misses you too.”

“Mary!” Claire shouted. “What's happened to you these past few days?”

“It's not just you who are in love.” she spoke a little more shyly now.

Claire and I looked at each other in surprise, but Mary didn't give us any more room for further questions, almost pushing us out of the shop. We laughed and agreed to leave her alone, at least for the moment. After some insistence, I managed to convince Claire that showering at home would be much better and more efficient. I didn't want to waste any more time there, I needed her like never before and in a place with more space than that tiny apartment. When she came across my motorcycle outside, we started a conversation that I already imagined would happen.

“You know you'll have to get rid of this bike of yours, don't you? I'll soon be too big to get on it, and besides, it's dangerous to ride it when pregnant, what if we have an accident? And after the baby is born, it will be impossible to take him on it!”

“I ken, Sassenach, I would never consider this possibility. But I dinna have to give up my first daughter, even if another one is on the way...” Aye, I had not been smart with my comment, the look in Claire's eyes indicated this very well. “What I meant was that we can have a car and I can keep the motorcycle to go for a ride once in a while, or when I need to go to the distillery and ye need to go to the flower shop.”

“Jamie, you are going to be a father! Am I going to have to spend every minute you're on the bike worrying about whether you'll make it home in one piece? I don't think so! I don't even like it now, let alone later! I've always made it clear that I don't like it, and with its money we can buy two cars!”

“Dinna exaggerate! She is not that expensive and I have always been responsible, I have never put my life in danger...” and of course my arguments were not valid. And this was our first discussion as a couple.

And it only ended when we got home and I shut her up with a kiss. A kiss that led to another, to a bite, to one less piece of clothing, and then another...until we were naked and devouring each other on the living room floor. It wasn't a wise choice, but at the time we weren't worried about the damn burns the carpet would cause us. Which we only found out when we went to take a shower and it was not pleasant.

“You know you can't end every discussion this way....” Claire said as she got dressed after her shower.

“Ye're going to say ye didna like it? And we ended up being punished anyway, the carpet will be out of the room soon.” 

“Jamie! I'm serious, we have a lot of things to deal with and you can't get away from them with sex, no matter how much I like it!” she said, still serious, but with a slight smile at the corner of her mouth.

“I ken, Sassenach. I promise that we will solve the motorcycle problem, but right now we have to prepare dinner because Ian will be here soon!”

“You are doing very well to get away from solving this matter.”

I answered her with my best smile and we went to get things ready to receive Ian. Which didn't take long. Claire was excited to see my brother-in-law again, the two of them had gotten along very well when we were in Lallybroch and she wasted no time in thanking him for the advice he had given me. Ian looked embarrassed and thanked her, but of course that wasn't enough to keep his mouth shut.

“No need to thank me Claire, after all ye gave us the best gift!” and his gaze went to Claire's belly, that at the same moment stared back at me intensely.

From the tone of her eyes I knew I was in trouble. Thank you, Ian! Thank you for being able to keep the secret for less time than I did!


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank you for all the comments, you have no idea how all of you are helping me going some tough times. My city is on lockdown and you bring some joy when I most nedd it!

_**POV Claire** _

That bloody Scot couldn't keep the pregnancy a secret for even a day? And he knew that I was not happy about it, his half smile gave it away very well. But I couldn't be angry with Ian, he had nothing to do with his best friend and brother-in-law' big mouth. The way he looked at me, with a huge smile on his face and his eyes sparkling, made me momentarily forget that I was angry with Jamie and I hugged him tight. Yeah, these hormones were making a mess, because at the same time I wanted to choke my dear boyfriend, I couldn't hold back a few tears that insisted on falling from my face because of the affection I was receiving from Ian.

“Dinna be angry with Jamie, he is nothing more than a proud father wanting to share his happiness with someone. When Jenny told me that she was pregnant for the first time, all I could do was shout out to everyone that I was going to be a father, but the lads at the distillery didna really admire my happiness when they still had a whole day's work ahead of them...anyway, what I wanted to say is that if ye have to be angry with someone, be angry with me, I was the one who was terrible at keeping this secret!”

“I'm not mad at anyone, Ian.” But of course my glance at Jamie indicated otherwise. “I just wanted to make sure that the baby was okay before I told everyone. But the appointment is tomorrow and...”

“It's tomorrow? What time is it? I'm going along, ye ken that, aye?” Jamie burst in, interrupting me.

“Of course you will, Jamie, and I was going to tell you about the appointment later, but from what I've seen, in this family we don't keep many things private...”

Ian and Jamie looked at me concerned, but I laughed and they relaxed. Since I had been to Lallybroch, I had realized how different Jamie's family was from mine. They were interested in everything that happened to each other and sometimes verged on the inconvenient, but I couldn't deny that it was very nice to feel all this affection. Ian promised me that he would not tell Jenny anything until we reported about the appointment, but I knew that it would be practically impossible for him to keep his promise, especially knowing Jamie's sister's insistence and sixth sense.

The rest of the evening was filled with lots of food and conversation about the new distillery unit. Jamie had not told me all the details, and it was very gratifying to know that my boyfriend had done most of the planning by himself, and had also found an investor to pay for the expansion of the business in London. I couldn't be prouder! And knowing that months ago he had no interest in taking over the family business, but I knew that Jamie was born for it.

As much as we insisted, Ian did not want us to go with him to the train station. He claimed that I had to rest and be well for the appointment the next day, just as Jamie who had worked all day. Of course he knew that we were not tired, but he also knew that we needed some time alone to discuss things that had happened in these more than two months away, as well as to enjoy this recent novelty that was the two of us being together. And that's what we did until we fell asleep, talking and enjoying each other's company, this time without tears, regrets or apologies. That is, apart from Jamie's apology for telling Ian about the pregnancy, and I must say his apology was pretty good!

When we woke up the next day, Jamie was restless, pacing around the house, trying to put things away that were out of place but really weren't, and this was starting to annoy me. The appointment with Gail would be first thing in the morning, I had made it at this time because I didn't want to lose the whole day's work. I was finishing getting ready when I felt Jamie pass in front of me for the tenth time.

“Jamie! What's wrong with you?” I shouted angrily. “If you walk in front of me one more time without saying anything, I swear I'll leave you here alone!” I saw that he stopped walking at the same minute and looked at me in anguish.

“Nothing's wrong with me, I'm just anxious about the appointment...what if something is wrong? What if these months of not being by yer side have hurt our daughter? What if...”

“If we keep imagining all the possibilities, we will go crazy. Jamie, neither you nor I did anything wrong, we both had no idea about this pregnancy! But I'm sure everything is fine, I'm young, healthy, at least most of the time, and most importantly, I have you by my side now. If anything happens, we'll face it together, right?” he smiled and pulled me into his arms.

“Right!”

“And stop saying it's a girl, if you're wrong, our son will feel bad...”

“I'm not wrong, Sassenach. And later ye can ask Jenny, I've never been wrong about the sex of my nieces and nephews!”

And with this new confidence, we took our things and went after a cab to go to Gail's office. Yes, motorcycle was out of the question that day, I didn't want to arrive there looking like a crazy mess. When we arrived, we waited no longer than the time to fill out the necessary paperwork for the appointment, I really was the first patient of the day. A nurse directed us to the room and showed us where the bathroom was so that I could change. I saw that Jamie was quiet just observing the things around him, it was probably the first time he was in a gynecologist's office, well, at least that's what I expected.

When I was ready and sitting in the exam chair, Gail entered the room and greeted us with a broad smile on her face. Although I was more intimate with Joe, we had a very good relationship and she was a lovely person, always answering my questions with that nice smile on her face, even when I pestered her about why we couldn't find a birth control method that worked for me without making me sick. Apparently I really needed one since I was totally irresponsible with the condom that was the only thing I could use.

“I suppose that's the father?” Gail stretched out her hand to Jamie. “I have to congratulate you for two reasons, the first is for the obvious, and the second is for finally getting this young lady to cut the coffee and settle down a bit!”

Jamie laughed at Gail and thanked her, saying that he had always thought the amount of coffee I drank was absurd, as was my addiction to the liquid. I just rolled my eyes, traitor, he was the one who always filled my cup every morning. Without prolonging the conversation any further, my doctor began to explain what she would be doing in that appointment so as not to leave any doubt for us first time parents. The morphological ultrasound would be performed, where she would be able to listen to the fetal heartbeat, determine the gestational age and estimate the probable date of delivery. But the most important thing would be to analyze the fetal morphology to look for malformations and to screen for any chromosomal abnormalities, such as Down's syndrome.

When we finished listening to all this information, I felt Jamie's nervous squeeze of my hand. I already knew all this and could have explained it to him earlier, but I was just as nervous as he was, which made me forget to share any details about that appointment before we got there. Gail noticed our apprehension and tried to calm us down, explaining that this procedure was normal, would not cause any harm to me or the fetus and that the probability of finding any malformation was rare, but if found, we had the necessary time to prepare ourselves and make this pregnancy the best possible one.

Our apprehension and nervousness soon improved when we heard our baby's heartbeat for the first time. It was at that moment that I finally believed that all of this was happening, I was pregnant, I was going to be a mother and as happy as I was to hear that intense and fast beating noise, a panic took over my body, was I ready to be a mother? Would I be good enough? But soon I felt Jamie's hands on my shoulder, his hands that were always warm, were cold and a little shaky, but even so I felt an instant security in knowing that I would have him by my side, that I was not alone in this adventure that was pregnancy.

When I looked up to see how he was doing, I saw the scene that will stay in my memory forever. Jamie, with all that size and stature, had his eyes filled with tears and a silly smile on his face admiring the monitor that showed all the activity of our little fetus. Noticing that he was being watched, he turned his gaze to me and his smile became even bigger, his hands, which had now found mine, squeezed them to assure me that everything was fine. But what made me lose all control I was trying to have in front of the doctor was when he mumbled the words "I love you". From that moment on I don't remember anything that was said, my eyes were blurred by my tears and the next thing I knew Jamie was helping me to change clothes.

What had happened to me? When had I become this woman who cries at anything? But all that was happening in my life wasn't just anything, that's what Jamie was trying to tell me as I mumbled that I was embarrassing myself everywhere by crying like crazy. Gail had left the room, she was going to get the results of the morphological exam that was printed elsewhere in the clinic, but we already knew that our baby was due at the beginning of February. 

It didn't take long before we received the big envelope in our hands, but Gail made sure to tell us that we had nothing to worry about, our baby was perfect, without any abnormalities or malformations. The pregnancy was uneventful and would remain so if I followed all of her recommendations, which of course Jamie was quick to tell her that he wouldn't let me forget to take any vitamins and that he would take care of my horrible diet. Ugh, I was lost, he would pick on me all the time now and worse, with my doctor's consent! She also asked us if we wanted to do the fetal sex test to know the sex of the baby or if we would wait a few months to find out by the traditional way of the ultrasound.

Of course Jamie was quick to say that he was already sure it was a girl, so we didn't need to spend money on a test that would only prove what he already knew. Gail laughed and congratulated me for finding the perfect boyfriend for me. I laughed and thanked her, but then I wondered, what did she mean by that? That I was stubborn and overbearing like Jamie? Yes, I guess I was, but I would never admit it out loud, least of all to him. We left the office much lighter and on the way to the flower shop, we started to argue about names.

“Our daughter will not be named Alex! I don't like that name ....” I frowned and Jamie looked at me indignantly.

“But it's my name!”

“No, your name is James Alexander and a few others, anyway, no one will know that our daughter is named after her father.”

“So Elizabeth is out of the question too.”

“Are you seriously making a fuss about your middle name? And I don't like Elizabeth anyway, no problem!” I heard only a mumbled reply in Gaelic.

Before we could continue with our discussion about names, the cab arrived at our destination, the flower shop. As I got out of the car, I ran into something, I mean, someone, that I never expected to see there. My father! He was standing in front of the window, as if he was building up the courage to enter, feigning interest in the flower arrangement in front of him.

“Dad?” I called out, giving him a little fright.

“Oh, Claire! I thought you were working and didn't want to disturb you...” he spoke a little slurred with the words, something I had never seen in my father before.

“I had an appointment, but you could have waited inside, Mary's working.”

“Well, yes, but she seems to be a little busy with that young man.” and pointed inside the store.

When I saw what he was showing me, I felt my mouth open in amazement and Jamie laughed behind me. Mary was leaning over the counter, one of her hands caressing the arm of our new delivery boy. I tried to ignore the scene before me and turn my attention back to my father and what he was doing there. It was the first time he had visited my flower shop, ever since I opened it, and he had never shown any interest in seeing the place, he had seen some pictures and commented on the window display, but nothing more than that.

“Dad, as much as I am happy about this unexpected visit, I can't imagine what you are doing here, even more unannounced!”

“Why didn't you tell me about this Claire?” he held up a magazine that was in his hand and I hadn't even noticed. It was the magazine that had published the article about my flower, of course, how could I have been so naïve as to believe that he was there because he wanted to be and not to ask me for something.

“I didn't know if you would be interested to know what I do with my flowers...” I spoke with a bit of disdain and noticed in his eyes a bit of sadness at my words.

“Sassenach.” I heard Jamie's voice behind me. “Why dinna ye show yer father the shop and the flower that is in the greenhouse? I'm sure he'd like to see up close what he read in the magazine. Meanwhile I'm going to talk to Mary about flirting at work time.” and with a slight laugh, he entered the flower shop without waiting for an answer from me.

It took me a few seconds to build up the courage to look at my father again, but he looked just as shy as I did. I gestured for him to follow me and we entered the shop, trying to ignore the laughter of Jamie, Mary, and Pierre, our new delivery boy, so as not to distract me. I explained and showed him a few things from the flower shop, but I didn't waste much time out front and took him to the greenhouse, the place where I spent most of my days and where I kept the first hybrid flower that Sarah had created. I tried to see in my father's face what he was feeling, but his face showed almost nothing as he examined everything around him.

“So, what did you think of my shop? My flowers?” I asked like an insecure child, looking down at my feet without being able to face him.

I felt him breathing heavily next to me and didn't know what to expect until his hand lifted my face to look at him. It was then that I saw something I hadn't seen in my father in a long time; emotion. His eyes were shining and I didn't know if it was with tears or just a reflection of the light, but he wasn't with his usual serious, almost frowning face, he was relaxed and a slight smile seemed to appear on his lips.

“I had no idea all that you had built here and after I read that article, I... I'm proud of you Claire Bear.” And without giving me time to breathe, he hugged me tight, causing me to shed tears of happiness for the second time that day.

_**POV Jamie** _

How can our lives be so unpredictable? A week ago I was just trying to understand how much Claire was being missed in my day, and now I was listening to the heartbeat of my daughter who was still inside her mother's belly. I had always heard Ian and my sister's stories about the various emotions they had about becoming parents, but nothing could prepare me for the feeling I had as I stood there beside Claire and listened to those fast, rhythmic beats of our baby who was barely big enough to be called that.

At that moment I knew that I had really found the woman of my life and no matter how many challenges we would have in the coming months, I was sure that we would be very happy. I felt my eyes fill with tears quickly, just as I felt Claire's gaze on me, which caused me to turn my attention to her. Smiling was automatic when I saw the same emotion I was feeling on her face, we had created something together that was wonderful and even though it was an accident, it couldn't have come at a better time. My voice was choked, but I managed to stammer out the words "I love you" to Claire, who returned it with a smile and watery eyes.

A relief came over both of us when we got the results of all the tests and knew that our daughter was fine, just like Claire. Yes, I was already sure that it was a girl even though there was no confirmation by exam. We left the office much lighter than when we entered and the drive to the flower shop was taken up with a small discussion between Claire and me about possible names for our baby. Why didn't she want Alex? She should be relieved that I did not suggest my sister's middle name, Flora or Arabella. And before you say it, yes, the Scots like to name their children after several names...should I tell Claire about this?

When we arrived at the flower shop, I was amazed to see her father standing there in front. The astonishment on Claire's face showed that she also didn't know why he was there, as far as I knew, he had never visited the shop or shown any interest in doing so. I tried to keep my distance and let the two of them talk alone, but Claire's voice was loud, questioning, I couldn't help but overhear the reason for that visit. He had a magazine in his hands, it was the magazine that the article about Claire's flower had appeared in. As I approached, I saw that Mr. Beauchamp was showing something to his daughter inside the store and I couldn't control my laughter when I saw what it was. Mary, the shy and quiet Mary, was leaning over the counter and undeniably flirting with the new delivery man.

“Sassenach.” I spoke up to get her attention. “Why dinna ye show yer father the shop and the flower in the greenhouse? I'm sure he'd like to see up close what he read in the magazine. Meanwhile, I'm going to talk to Mary about flirting at work time.” and with a slight laugh, I walked into the flower shop without waiting for an answer from her.

I knew she would do as I said, but now my attention was focused on something else. When I reached the counter, I saw that Mary didn't even notice me enter the shop, continuing her conversation with the guy. What was his name again?

“Hey Mary, has it become standard in this flower shop to flirt with the delivery men? And I thought I had made a good impression, apparently it's all about having a motorcycle and being handsome.” By the time I finished speaking, Mary was completely flushed and didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

But when me and the guy, christ, I really need to ask his name, started laughing, she relaxed and laughed too. Of course she wasted no time in explaining herself, saying that she was only explaining to Pierre (that was his name, I knew he had some French in him) how the system they used in the shop worked. I know very well the system she was teaching him...because when she was actually explaining it to me, it was nothing like what she was doing with Pierre. Which actually comforts me, at least she never flirted with me, that would be very strange.

I tried to chat a little with the guy, but he seemed much more interested in the movements Mary was making to arrange things out of place over there on the counter. I knew that she was trying to show me that she was working, but he wasn't hiding it. And that's when I heard him whisper a few words in his native language, probably to impress Mary and thinking that no one would understand.

“Je pense que je vais laisser tomber quelque chose sur le sol pour que tu descends... (I think I'm going to drop something on the floor so you can get down...)” And of course she laughed and smiled at him with her eyes shining.

“Si tu le fais, je te déposerai d'abord par terre. (If you do that, I will knock you to the ground first)" I answered in perfect French, startling him. He just gave me a half smile and shook his head as if he agreed with what I had said.

Mary stared at us not understanding what was going on, but I laughed and told her that I was just practicing some of my rusty French and asked Pierre if I was still doing well. He was quick to tell me that I was doing very well and that I sounded like a native. Mary smiled at me as if to thank me for not saying anything more about what was going on there before Claire and I arrived. I didn't know if all the flirting would lead to anything, but at least Pierre had already been warned not to play games with our friend.

“Ah Mary, I forgot to mention this yesterday, but I have to thank ye for the invitation that day, if it wasn't for that....” before continuing to speak, I saw that Pierre was paying a lot of attention to our conversation. “Anyway, thank ye!” I finished a little embarrassed.

“You don't have to thank me Jamie, I think we're even.” she laughed and looked at Pierre, making me quickly understand what she meant. I couldn't help but laugh too, who knew that sweet Mary would say that to me one day?

But our conversation was interrupted by the appearance of Mr. Beauchamp accompanied by a red-eyed Claire. What had happened? Had they argued again? But as I looked at her father's features, I saw something that was nothing like what I had witnessed at that fateful dinner. Joy and calm. He was happy, in his English way, but happy.

“James, I've already invited Claire, but I want to reinforce it with you. Dinner at my house on Sunday and I don't want to hear no for an answer!” he said seriously, but with a slight smile on his lips.

“Of course, Mr. Beauchamp, we'll be there!” I answered quickly, still not understanding what was happening.

“Young man, you can call me Henry, otherwise I'll feel older than I already am! See you Sunday!”

“I'll see ye Sunday! Mr...I mean, Henry. Sunday!” I was almost stuttering, which provoked a laugh from Claire's father. What was going on with people today? First it's Mary all loose, now it's Claire's dad laughing in my face?

I saw my Sassenach saying goodbye to her father once again and I stood there waiting for an explanation. She, seeing my astonished face, came over and hugged me.

“Can you explain this super power of yours? Ever since you told me you love me, my days have only gotten better!” she whispered in my ear.

I smiled and kissed her, but as flattered as I was, I still didn't understand what had happened minutes ago. But before I could ask anything else, she pulled me by the hand into her office, leaving the other two lovebirds alone, something I still didn't feel entirely comfortable doing. Only that would have to wait, now I wanted to talk to Claire and find out everything that had happened between her and her father. And when she told me, I couldn't help but pull her into a strong hug, I knew more than anyone how important it was for her to have her father's approval and support in what she was doing. Things really seemed to be falling into place after we became a couple, a family, it seemed that the world was telling us that this was meant to be, that one was the missing piece in the other's life.

The days until dinner at the Beauchamp house had flown by. Both Claire and I had a lot of work that we had to put aside to spend some time together, but now real life had knocked on our door and we could no longer ignore it. Without realizing it, we got into a routine that was working very well. During the day, we both worked at our respective workplaces and after work, I stopped by the flower shop to take my Sassenach home. She still argued every time she got on my motorcycle that I should immediately look for a car to buy, that she couldn't stand spending hours untangling her hair, besides the fear she felt every time we came across a bus or a truck. I was already arguing with her that she should leave some clothes at home instead of carrying a small backpack every day, but she insisted that it was easier this way because she never knew in advance what she wanted to wear to work, that she liked to decide on the spot.

And finally Sunday arrived, and along with it a completely anxious Claire. But this time her anxiety was different, she wasn't nervous like the other time, which was instructing me from minute to minute on how I should behave, how I should dress and a thousand other details. This time she let me dress without giving any hints and also put on an outfit that showed who the Claire I saw every day and fell in love with was. The only thing she demanded of me was to leave the motorcycle in the garage, we would go by cab so that she could arrive calmer and with her hair and makeup intact. I didn't object at all, she wasn't picking on me for wearing jeans and that was great.

When we arrived at the famous door of that huge Victorian house, we took a deep breath and looked at each other before ringing the bell. While I waited for someone to greet us, I fixed my hair once more, which this time was loose, and checked the bottle of whisky I was carrying. Everything was fine. I just hoped Henry would like our product, after all, it would help secure the future of his first granddaughter. Fuck. We had not discussed this! In the rush of the days, I didn't stop to ask Claire if we would tell her parents about the pregnancy, but now there was no more time, soon the door was opened and we were greeted by a smiling Julia Beauchamp.

As last time, we were taken to the library of the house where drinks would be served before dinner. When I saw Henry already preparing a glass of whisky, I hurried to hand over the bottle I was holding. He was curious for a moment as he read the famous label that told the whole story of our family and the distillery.

“James, I must confess that I am really in awe of the beauty of this bottle as well as the history of your family. I have always found it interesting and noble of the Scots the way they appreciate and value family. I am sure it must be a hit over there, and I am honored to have a bottle now.”

“Dad, Jamie is expanding his business, next month he will open a Fraser distillery here in London!” Claire smiled at me, and I could see the pride in her eyes.

“Oh, that's great news! And it deserves a toast!” he quickly opened the bottle I had given him a few minutes earlier and poured a shot for each of us. “I think the girls will want something softer, won't they?”

“I think we should all toast with whiskey for good luck in the business.” Claire's mother spoke up, unceremoniously taking the bottle from Henry's hand.

I looked at Claire, who shrugged and accepted the glass her father handed her. Was she really going to drink? I looked at her seriously, but she seemed to ignore my glances and continued to smile at her parents. All right, we'll just toast, she doesn't have to drink more than a sip, it won't do anything for the baby. Right? As I thought about all these things, I felt Claire's elbow lightly hit mine, causing me to turn my attention back to what Henry was saying.

“Here's to this new endeavor of the Frasers and also to our dear Claire Bear who has achieved something wonderful in her field!” everyone toasted and I couldn't help but look at my Sassenach who was once again looking bright eyed after hearing her father's words.

Just as we took a sip of the drink, Claire spit out the liquid startling Henry and Julia who were complimenting the whiskey.

“Claire! That again! What's wrong with you to spit the drink out like that?” Julia spoke up as she was once again the victim of her daughter.

I turned to Claire who looked at me seriously, I knew what she was thinking and just nodded, opening a smile to assure her that everything was alright, I was by her side and everything would be fine. Hand in hand, we turned our attention back to the Beauchamps who were waiting for a response to our strange behavior.

“Dad, Mom...” Claire spoke slowly, she was nervous and I squeezed her hand to give her the strength to continue. “We can toast another achievement...you are going to be grandparents!”

And a silence filled the Beauchamps' house.


	26. Chapter 26

_**POV Claire** _

Dinner was going well, better than I had imagined. In fact, it was the best since I opened my flower shop, and going to my parents' house on Sundays had become an unpleasant obligation. My parents seemed relaxed, with a smile on their faces that was so unusual when I was there, and it was making me feel good. Even better when my father started complimenting Jamie's whisky, I knew how rare it was for such words to come out of his mouth so I was sure they were true.

And then came the proposal of the toast. Even my mother was willing to try a drink that she knew would not please her palate at all, but she would do it to toast Jamie's success, and not only his, but mine as well. I was still so ecstatic and shocked at how different things were between us that I completely ignored Jamie's gaze when my father offered me a glass of whisky. If he wanted to make a toast, who was I to say no? But when the drink came in contact with my lips I remembered that I shouldn't be drinking anything alcoholic and to my mother's happiness, I once again spit it all out on her blouse. It was not on purpose, I had acted completely out of reflex and fright. I knew I was being exaggerated, a sip of whisky wouldn't hurt the baby, but at the time I didn't think about it and did what seemed logical in my head.

Of course my mother was not happy with what I had done. What could I do to make her understand that it was all right? That this time I hadn't spit the drink out because I was angry with them? Tell her the big news, of course! I looked seriously at Jamie and he soon understood what I wanted to do, confirming me with a simple nod and a smile. I took a deep breath and let out the words that could change the mood that night.

“Dad, Mom...” I spoke slowly, I was nervous, but then I felt Jamie squeezing my hand to give me strength to continue. “We can toast another achievement... you are going to be grandparents!”

An uncomfortable silence took over the place and I tried to continue with the smile on my face, but some tears seemed to want to spring to my eyes. I couldn't hold my emotions in any longer, and I knew it was only the beginning, and it would probably get much worse. Jamie kept squeezing my hand tightly and I didn't know if it was to give me strength or the other way around. He was pale and I think that if he let go of me, he would probably fall hard to the ground. Funny, where was the brave warrior who faced my father the other time? Well, I don't blame him, now his position was much worse than the first time he was here.

“The Scots are not only great at producing whisky, but also seem to be very efficient in other departments...” my father spoke seriously, but I could see a small smile appearing on his lips. Was he making a joke? Was that it? Henry Beauchamp having fun at the expense of his daughter's boyfriend?

Jamie, who was trying to calm himself by taking a sip of his drink, almost choked on the words spoken by his father-in-law. I didn't know whether to help him or to respond to what my father had said. It turned out that I did neither, as my mother, who had not yet spoken up, decided to say something.

“Henry! What kind of manners are these?” she said angrily, drawing his attention, something I hardly ever saw her do. “Your daughter gives us this great news and this is how you react? Poor James, he's redder than a red bell pepper! But don't worry about it.” And she looked at Jamie. “It's really not what I expected to hear so soon, but it's exciting to know that I'm going to be a grandmother!” And with a smile on her face, she came over to me and hugged me.

I couldn't remember the last time I had received a hug from my mother, and a tight, real hug at that. Of course, the tears that were threatening to fall from my eyes couldn't bear another display of affection and were soon wetting my face. We hugged for a few minutes and when we parted, I saw a scene that I couldn't imagine, my father was hugging Jamie. Nothing like the hug my mom had given me, but it was already something to bring more tears to my eyes. Ugh, I think I had cried more in this last week than in my whole life, but the good thing was that they were tears of happiness.

The next thing I knew, we were all hugging and talking at the same time, without understanding each other, and that's when my father spoke up again, wanting to know all the details. Of course, the fact that he was a doctor would interfere at some point and he wasted no time in asking all the possible questions, most of which, thankfully, we had the answers to. He was even more relieved to know that it was Joe and Gail who had attended to me, he trusted them both completely.

“Dad, you know I always make appointments with both of them once a year, after all it is your email that reminds me to schedule them. But I must confess that I did not expect this result at my annual check-up, and even though it was a surprise, we are very happy.” I said as I pulled Jamie close to me. “Happy, but still a little scared...”

“Claire, this is normal, when I found out I was pregnant with you, I drove your father crazy with questions and more questions. I wasn't ready to be a mother yet, at least that's what I thought, we had just gotten married and your father didn't stop at home because of his shifts... in the end everything worked out and we raised a wonderful daughter, stubborn like her father, but no less talented.”

Jamie couldn't hold back his laughter and I slapped him hard on the arm. He would throw that in my face for the rest of his life, my mother confessing that I am stubborn only showed him how right he was when he did the same. As if he were not a hardheaded person at all! My parents ended up laughing too and started sharing moments from my childhood that only proved what my mother had said. Jamie was having much more fun than I was, but I would get my revenge and it would be soon. I was sure that Jenny would love to share with me embarrassing and compromising moments of little James Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser. I would also demand an explanation as to why he had such a long name!

As we sat down to dinner, my father asked us where we were going to live now that there was a baby on the way. He made the point that my apartment was totally unsuitable for raising a child, that there was barely enough room for one person in it. And this only satisfied Jamie again, who started talking about all the times he told me the same thing, but that I was too stubborn to get rid of that cubicle. Seriously, can't we go back to the days when my dad and Jamie didn't get along? That was annoying. And it was in the midst of discussing where we were going to raise our daughter, that my father came up with an idea.

“Why don't you talk to your Uncle Lambert? His apartment is empty most of the time and besides being more than big enough for you, it's also in a great location, close to your work and downtown.”

“I'm not going to move Uncle Lamb out of his apartment just because I'm pregnant! We can find another place, and Jamie's apartment is bigger than mine.” Did my father really want to move his brother out of his own house?

“My apartment only has one bedroom, it may be bigger than yers, but we would have the same space problem.” Jamie said, and received a frown in response. Of course he smiled at me as if he hadn't said anything wrong.

“I think you are too hasty, the pregnancy is still in the beginning, we have time to solve all these details.”

“Claire, this is not a simple detail. And do you intend to wait until the belly grows to move? This will only wear you out and you know the risks of carrying weight...” and there goes my father with his doctor's speech, along with that of an overprotective father.

It turned out that the rest of the dinner was like an interrogation about our plans for the future, plans that we didn't have time to discuss, but that Jamie made sure to tell my parents that everything was already settled. He was lucky to be in front of witnesses, otherwise I would have killed him right there. Which I almost did when we got home, but that bloody Scot always managed to make me forget within seconds why I was angry with him. Lucky he had that smile, that body, red hair... well, lucky he was practically a Greek god and my hormones were all messed up.

The next day I was surprised with a call from my Uncle Lamb. He was somewhere in the world on one of his projects, but of course when he heard the news from my father, he stopped everything he was doing to call his favorite niece. And only one, I must say. But really I was his favorite niece. My uncle was never a person who was very good with children, but it seems that my stubborn and curious way of being made me follow him everywhere, when my father let me, of course. His call made me happy and emotional once again, of course, that was all that was happening these last days.

He made official the proposal my father had made the night before, offering his apartment for Jamie and me to live in. I didn't want to accept, but he insisted that the place spent more time locked up than with someone living in it, that the apartment needed life and nothing like a young family to bring that about. The only thing he asked was that we store his historical artifacts and books in my parents' house, the place he would stay when he returned to London. I insisted that I should pay him rent on a monthly basis, I didn't want to live there for free, as a favor. Uncle Lamb was not a person who liked to argue, so he said he would think of an amount if it would make me feel good.

And the next month was pure madness. Jamie was working hard for the upcoming grand opening of the distillery. After the article appeared in the magazine, the flower shop was in greater demand, increasing the pace of our work. All this combined with a move, made my stress level skyrocket, which was only made worse by Jamie stopping me from helping him carry the few things we were taking to the new apartment, since my uncle had left most of the furniture there. I was fine, still early in the pregnancy, there was no reason why I couldn't help carry my own things.

When we finally went up with the last boxes, and yes, this building also had no elevator. One of the reasons Jamie was being so insistent that I stay in the apartment organizing things while he went up with everything. Anyway, when we finished going up, I looked around the living room and there wasn't a single space that wasn't a mess of stuff and boxes. Of course, my dear boyfriend didn't bother one bit to read that I had written on each box the name of the room where he was supposed to take that thing.

“Sassenach, I didna have time to sort through everything, but now we can start putting each thing away, especially since ye wrote everything down, there's no way I can go wrong!”

Of course, his statement was totally flawed. Every time he opened a box, he kept shouting at me where he should put it, so I had to stop what I was doing to help him and it was taking me twice as long to put everything away. This only made him lose his patience and start to throw his things into the big closet he had in the bedroom, claiming that he would organize them calmly later, but that he needed to relax. I took a deep breath and tried to ignore him, but when I entered our room and saw that he had thrown my box with my precious and expensive perfumes, all the anger I had felt all day was released in one scream.

“James Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser!” I shouted as I walked to the kitchen, where he was calmly drinking a beer. “You bloody Scot! Can't you read a damn instruction?” I said, almost rubbing the box in his face. “What's written here? Huh? How hard is it to follow at least one thing I ask?” While I was yelling, I noticed that he remained serious, staring at me, but he wasn't really looking at my face.

The blouse I was wearing was low-cut and in the last month my breasts had grown considerably in size, so nothing almost fit without them popping out of the neckline. The bastard was staring at my breasts!

“Jamie! My face is here!” I put my hand on his chin, trying to lift his gaze. And what did he do? He smiled at me! That made me even angrier. “You Scot...” but before I could finish my sentence, he stopped me with a kiss.

And what a kiss! For a second I tried to push him away, I was still angry, but he held me tightly by the hair, intensifying the kiss with a desperation and sensuality that made me moan into his mouth. In just one movement, he had me sitting on the counter that he had been leaning on until then. I tried to kiss him, but he pulled away, his hands were on my blouse, desperately trying to get it off, and he did so when I raised my arms in surrender. His eyes now stared at the part of my body that was bringing him so much desire, and I couldn't help but smile when I saw his reaction to my plump breasts. His hands were soon on them, and without wasting any more time, he removed my bra, the only obstacle to his thirsty desire. When his tongue touched them, I held on tighter to the counter, I knew I was more sensitive, but I had no idea how much.

As much as I wanted him to continue what he was doing, my body said otherwise, I needed him inside me and soon. I pulled him by his hair, making him face me. His eyes were a shade of dark blue, they were covered with desire and I only had to spread my legs for him to understand the invitation. In seconds his clothes were on the floor and his desperate hands were searching for a way to remove my leggings and panties in one movement. And he did. I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him closer and soon feeling how excited for me he was. I felt his finger touch me and a moan escaped my mouth. He smiled as he realized that I was more than ready for him. I didn't need any more stimulation, I just needed to feel him inside me. He kissed me violently, lifted one of my legs to accommodate himself better, and without any warning, thrust into me all at once, driving me crazy in seconds.

“You know...you can't always solve an argument with sex....” I said still breathless. We were sitting on the kitchen floor trying to recover from what had happened minutes before.

“I ken...but are ye going to tell me that this isn't a much better way for me to hear ye screaming my name?”

_**POV Jamie** _

The move to Claire's uncle's apartment had been crazy. Both of us were working a lot, so there wasn't much time to organize all our things. I wasn't taking much with me from my apartment, I had rented it fully furnished, so it was a matter of taking my personal items. The hardest part was convincing Claire that she didn't need to take her crooked bookcase and the piece of furniture I had helped her put together when we first met. But who was I to argue with a woman who was in a different mood every minute? She insisted on the furniture that was the only furniture that brought her good memories, and even though it was difficult to take it to our new apartment, I made the sacrifice.

Another difficult thing was trying to convince her that she didn't need to help me carry all the boxes with our things, much less organize everything by herself on the very first day. But I could see in her glare at me that if I continued with this insistence that she had to be quiet, I might not be able to move for the next few days. And it was because of all of this that we had our second argument, actually to be an argument, it would have to involve more than one person and in this case it was just Claire yelling at me while I admired the movement of her body in front of me. Okay, I'll be honest, I wasn't admiring her whole body, just a specific part that seemed to want to pop out of that cleavage and... I couldn't help myself.

Let's just say that we were able to ascertain very well the height of the kitchen counter and how efficient it was. We still needed to see if it was good enough to prepare something to eat, but now we just needed to recover the breath we had lost with all that physical effort.

“You know...you can't always solve an argument with sex....” Claire said breathlessly. We were sitting on the kitchen floor trying to recover from what had happened minutes before.

“I ken...but are ye going to tell me that this isn't a much better way for me to hear ye screaming my name?” and I was obviously slapped hard in the chest after saying this.

The next few days were divided into getting the whole apartment in order to receive our first guests and me getting the last details of the grand opening party of the distillery organized with John Grey.

“Are ye sure ye are prepared to host the whole troupe of Frasers-Murrays? Sassenach, we only have two bedrooms, they have four children! Where will they all stay? One on top of the other? And I'm warning ye, I'm not sharing our room with anyone! I've had enough of the lack of privacy in Lallybroch, I don't need it here either...”

“Will you stop complaining? They are your family, Jamie! And it's the first time Jenny comes with her children to London, I couldn't let them stay in a hotel! And the living room is big, the kids will love sleeping in front of the TV!”

“So, the first time my sister travels by plane, which I paid for by the way, because they wanted to come by train, it would be the complete package of a perfect trip for them to stay in a hotel with all the luxury and luxury they dinna have at home!”

“We may not have a luxurious apartment, although I think it is too much for us, but we can offer all the luxuries they deserve. I don't intend to let my sister-in-law do anything around here. They are guests!”

“Sister-in-law? Is that how it is?”

“Just like what, Jamie? She's going to be our son's aunt, what do you want me to call her? Don't forget that we've skipped a few stages in this relationship to think of any formality of treatment now.”

“I didna see anyone complaining about anything months ago at Lallybroch” I mumbled, but I had to have learned by now that when Claire wanted to, she listened to everything we said, even if she was meters away.

“Fraser, if I were you, I would go now and buy the things on the list I just texted you.” Claire had given up calling me by my full name when she was angry, claiming that I had too many names and that it tired her out, missing the point of the scolding. So when I listened to Fraser, I knew I had better do what she was asking for.

The next day we went to the airport to pick up my big little family. Ah, another new thing in our lives was that we now had a car. Much against my will and after some discussions, we reached an agreement that I would leave the motorcycle to go to work at the distillery and for a ride every now and then while Claire would keep the car to go to the flower shop and any other appointments she might have since I would be away from her all day. And you can't imagine my happiness when my dear girlfriend told this news to my sister who made a point of telling her that I had a savings account that I had never touched and that it would be great to buy the new car.

And there went years of saving for a car that I didn't want to buy. I will not be a hypocrite to say that I did not like Claire's choice, who would not like to drive an Audi Q5? But besides preferring the freedom of the bike, I had almost been banned from being the driver. Claire claimed that I already had the bike and the car was hers, and that she had to enjoy it while her belly let her sit in the driver's seat. And what was the problem in all this? I really didn't mind not being the driver, if it weren't for my girlfriend's terrible driving skills! Every time we went out I was so tense that my legs hurt when I got out of the car, and it was not for lack of space inside.

After a warm welcome at the airport, we wasted no time in getting them all into the car and driving to the apartment. The party would be that day and I still had many details to work out with Ian who had just arrived. My nephews and nieces kept asking us questions about everything they saw out the window and even though they were cramped in the back seat, they were having a great time. Ian and I were talking when we heard my sister let out another sigh and said, "Och Claire, who did ye learn to drive like that from? I ken I wasn't very nice when ye went to Lallybroch, but I hope I get to yer apartment without throwing up my breakfast." Everyone was silent, especially me, who avoided looking at my girlfriend at all costs, who let out a slight giggle and replied.

"Payback is a bitch, huh?". Laughter echoed through the car and Ian made a point of saying that Claire was very welcome in the family after that answer.

The rest of the day went by in the blink of an eye and it was only now, in the comfort and silence of our bedroom that I was able to have a proper conversation with Claire. We were both getting ready for the party and I was trying to give her all the details of the evening, but my discourse stopped when she came out of the bathroom and stopped in front of me. I couldn't find the words to describe her beauty at that moment, my mouth was open, but nothing was coming out of it.

“Is everything okay? Isn't it over the top?” she asked as she turned to look at herself in the mirror.

“Have I ever told ye that ye are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen?” I said, still with difficulty. Her tight black dress accentuated everything I liked most about her body.

“Yes, but it's always good to hear it again, especially when I'm starting to see curves that I didn't have before...”

“And they're only making ye hotter...” and standing behind her, I squeezed her ass lightly, causing her to cry out slightly.

“Jamie! Your nephews and nieces are getting ready in the front room.” she whispered as I began to kiss her neck.

“That's why they invented walls and doors and locks, to give us privacy.”

“Fraser, you can't be late for the opening of your own distillery.” her words didn't agree with the movement of her body.

“Hum, they won't even notice...” and my hands were trying to find the zipper on that damn dress.

“Jamie! We have the rest of the night for this!” she said, pulling away from me sharply. “Now I want to see my boyfriend show the English how to make good whisky!” and with a quick kiss on my lips, she left me standing there while she finished getting ready. Well, I was trying to recover from the state she had left me in. After all, I couldn't disguise much while wearing only a kilt.

An hour later we were arriving at the distillery. We had split up into two cabs, which already caused a slight confusion, because my nephews wanted to go with Claire and me, but my sister thought it better to separate them so that there wouldn't be any fights, and it took us more than fifteen minutes. Even so we still managed to arrive before most of the guests, not that this brought me any calm, I was nervous about the speech I would be giving later to inaugurate the activities of our new headquarters. Ian seemed calm as always and was soon lost in conversation with some members of the Fraser family who were already there.

Even though she insisted that I should be alone, I didn't let Claire leave my side as I walked around and greeted people. I needed her there by my side, she was the one who was giving me the strength not to turn my back and lock myself in a room alone. Why was I so nervous? Was it because John Grey had put all his trust and money into my business? Was it because Ian had also trusted me to expand a business that until then only he had taken care of? Or because I had just seen my uncles enter the party? Of course they would be there, the Mackenzies had business dealings with the Grey family. I really should have checked the guest list that John had sent me last month. I could at least prepare myself for this reunion.

“Who would have thought we would see the Fraser distillery in London soil.” Dougal Mackenzie spoke with his usual overbearing smile when he met me.

“If the Mackenzies came to London, why would the Frasers be stuck in Scotland alone?” I said seriously, but quickly cracked a small smile when I felt Claire's hand squeeze mine.

“I'm sure yer mother would be proud, Jamie.” Colum, my mother's older brother, spoke up. As if he hadn't been the one who cut ties with his sister when she married a Fraser. And that he didn't also try to use me to steal Lallybroch from our family.

I took a deep breath and thought about what would be the most appropriate response not to cause a fight, when John Grey interrupted our conversation. He wanted to introduce me to some of his clients and I wasted no time in turning away from my uncles with just a nod of my head in response to what my uncle had said. Claire excused herself to John and said that she would sit with Jenny and the children, claiming that her feet were hurting, but I knew that she wanted to make me more comfortable to talk business without having to worry about her.

The night went by quickly, between one guest and another, I did not notice the time passing, and when John and Ian came to call me to finally open the distillery, a certain despair overcame me. I felt my stomach turn with every step I took towards one of the barrels that would be just a symbol of where we would start producing our whisky. I knew that all those people there were waiting for my words and this was making me nervous. But when I went up the steps to the production area, I could see the table where my family was. My nephews and nieces looked at me as if I and their father were some kind of hero, as if we were the most important people in the place, the same way the women in our lives looked at us. Admiration, that's what was marked on their faces, little did they know that I admired them even more.

“Good evening to all of ye who have taken the time to come and see a new brand of whisky in town. But although it is new to the English capital, Fraser distillery has a long history, which I intend to summarize so as not to bore ye. My father learned the recipe for this precious liquid from my grandfather, who timidly ventured out into the back of his estate to produce a whisky that was decent to drink and would save him a few coins at the end of the month. So, what started as a project to recreate his father's recipe just to fulfill an old desire, became a business for Brian Fraser. A business that he could not see grow, but which in the hands of my sister and brother-in-law, became one of the most traditional whiskies in the Highlands. And why risk coming to London and expanding the market? Because, to me, Jamie Fraser, the son who could not face the legacy left by his father when he left suddenly, has now realized that nothing is more important in this life than family, that it is family that will always believe in yer potential even when ye do not believe it yourself. Nothing would make my father happier than to make the English finally get to know real whisky. And with these words, I declare the Fraser distillery in London officially open for business!”

Everyone applauded and raised their glasses in a big toast. I could see tears in Ian's eyes as he came over to hug me after my speech. I probably should have been like him, but I was so ecstatic about everything that was happening that I just wanted to get to the table where Claire and Jenny were. When I finally reached my destination, I was overcome with excited hugs from my nephews who were shouting Uncle Jamie non-stop. I looked at Claire and saw that she was thrilled, but before I could get close to her, my sister took me in a strong hug that almost took my breath away.

“He would really be proud of ye, brother. And so am I! I always knew ye could do it!” she whispered the words in my ear. I couldn't answer anything and just hugged her tighter, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

Soon my sister let go of me and went to meet her husband, of whom she was also proud. I wasted no time in hugging my Sassenach, who was already with open arms waiting for me. How good it was to have her there with me and I couldn't contain the urge to take her off the floor with my hug.

“Jamie!” she called my attention, but soon laughed at what I was doing. “Did you know that I love you? And that I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to know that you are mine?”

“I love ye too, Sassenach! And the lucky one is me. I am totally yers and happy to be there.” And I kissed her.

At the end of that night, when we were lying in our bed after showing all the love we felt for each other, Claire lay on my chest and spoke.

“Are you really sure it's a girl?”

“Aye, I am, why? Are ye still having doubts?”

“No, I mean, I don't know. But today, while listening to your speech, I was sure of the name we are going to give our daughter.”

“Oh aye? And what would that be?” I asked curiously.

“Brianna...”

She didn't need to explain to me why. My eyes filled with tears. The name was perfect, as was the woman lying on my chest.


	27. Chapter 27

_**POV Claire** _

The morning after the opening party of the distillery, I lost sleep in the early hours of the morning. I didn't know whether it was because of all that had happened that had left me in a whirlwind of emotions, or because the house was full and I was worried about making my guests comfortable. I think it was for all these reasons. Besides a slight heartburn, something I had just discovered and that would accompany me throughout the entire pregnancy. Jamie was sleeping heavily and I didn't want to wake him up, the last few days had been exhausting for him and seeing that smile on his lips only affirmed that he was happy and needed those hours of sleep.

As gently as I could, I got out of bed and left him alone. Not only did he not notice, but he stretched out, taking up all the available space. Slacker. But how could I not smile when I saw him lying on his stomach, with his legs spread and showing off all that magnificent body. I was really a lucky woman and if it wasn't for the burning sensation I felt, I would be back in that bed right now. I took a deep breath and looked for my robe. Tiptoeing, I walked past the living room where the children were sleeping. They probably wouldn't wake up so early, because they were so excited about the party and then the joy of being able to watch cartoons until late at night that they didn't want to sleep at all. Jamie and I heard Jenny's screams telling them to turn off the TV when it was already over two in the morning.

“Dinna fash Claire, these kids are used to the noises at Lallybroch, they dinna wake up to anything but me almost knocking them out of bed.”

“Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!” I shouted when I heard Jenny's voice coming from the kitchen. I immediately put my hands over my mouth. But really the children didn't even move. “Are Scots trained from an early age to be absolutely silent in order to scare people? Is it a secret weapon?” My heart was still racing from the fright I had received, and Jenny laughed at my question.

“In my case the training was to go unnoticed in a house with four children and a husband who is almost as much trouble as one of the children. I won't say that it always works, but sometimes I get a quiet half hour.” she answered me and got up from the bench she was sitting on. She picked up another cup and poured me some tea, the same tea she was drinking.

I sat down on the other stool at the small island in the kitchen. We were silent for a minute. The two of us still hadn't talked much, much less about my pregnancy. Of course, Jenny had called as soon as she heard the news from Ian, made the fuss I imagined she would make for her little brother, but we both didn't get a chance to talk much about it. I had so many questions, and as much as my mother shared a few moments of her own experience that day at dinner, I seemed to feel more comfortable getting my answers from Jenny. Which was funny, since she hadn't treated me so well the first time we met.

“Jenny...” I called out, but didn't know where to start and saw her curious look in my direction. “I, I wish... I don't know...”

“If ye will be a good mother? If ye ken how to be a mother?” she completed my sentence, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world what I was going to ask.

“Does it run in the family? The gift of knowing what I'm thinking?”

“It actually seems to be a gift of yers Claire, what ye're thinking shows up clearly on yer face...”

“Yeah, Jamie has already told me that and that's why I'm a terrible liar.”

“Ye really are, because I can see that ye are still uncomfortable with my presence.” I didn't know what I hated more at the moment, my gift of not being able to hide what I was thinking or the fact that these Frasers are great at reading me so well and being super direct to the point. “Claire, I ken we didna start off so well, that I seemed to blame ye for Jamie not pursuing the career I wanted him to pursue. But I ken that if anyone was to blame for everything that happened, it was me. It was me who pushed him when our father passed away, me who didna see the signs that he wasn't happy back at Lallybroch, and me who didna see what he did when our uncles betrayed us. Ye were the person who pulled him out of the hole he was in, ye who made him see his potential, so I have ye to thank. Besides, ye're the one who brought me the joy of being an aunt!”

“Jenny, I... I'm terrible at talking and exposing my feelings, unlike you and your brother. But you are not guilty of anything, you were just playing the role of big sister, you were worried about him and I'm sure he doesn't blame you for anything that happened. Not that it was right, but it all worked out in the end, didn't it? And now we are very proud of him. And as for me bringing you the joy of being an aunt, you know it wasn't entirely my doing, right? Your brother had a very important part in all of this, I can almost say a very big part!”

“Claire!” she shouted and closed her eyes. “I can't think about my brother like this!”

“Jenny! I didn't mean it that way!” we both burst out laughing, but she soon turned serious again and she put her hand over mine.

“As for yer doubts about being a mother, Claire, no one is born knowing how to be a mother and even less if we will be good at it. When I was pregnant with wee Jamie, I swear my doctor wanted to run away from me after the third month. I would call her for anything, and when he was born? One sneeze and I wanted to run to the doctor's office. Ian was the one who stopped me several times, he was also the one who comforted me when I cried of pain while breastfeeding and felt like the worst mother in the world for complaining about it. He was also the one who helped me calm down when I thought I would tear my hair out for not being able to take care of the baby and the house. Can ye imagine when I got pregnant for the third time? I freaked out!”

“But I always thought...no, let it go....”

“That I wanted a big family? Of course I always wanted it, but ye wanting it and facing the reality of it are two very different things. But, Claire, freaking out, crying, worrying, all that is normal, after all we are still human beings with emotions. That doesn't mean that we are terrible mothers, that means that we care, but that we have some bad days. That is why it is so important to have people who love us around. I am sure Jamie will be a great dad, but ken that I will always be a call or video call away. Ye can call me whenever ye need me, especially when my brother is annoying ye.”

We laughed, but I couldn't stop the tears from forming in my eyes. I was an only child, I never knew what it was like to have the affection and support of a sibling, but sitting there and hearing all that from Jenny made me feel that I was already part of that family and would always have someone to count on. It also made me see that the person I thought was a perfect mother, had also suffered from the same doubts and fears that I had. I instinctively put my hand on my belly. It was just beginning to show, very lightly, but it seemed that I could already feel our daughter inside.

“It's an incredible feeling, isn't it? And ye still think ye won't be a good mother? This connection we have from the beginning is something unique to us and I'm sure ye already feel it...” Jenny smiled at me.

I just nodded as my hands caressed my belly. I saw that Jenny stood up and before I could ask what she was doing, she whispered in my ear, "Yer prince charming is awake, and I guess he didna like being left alone in bed." I looked back and saw a disheveled Jamie, wearing only a pair of shorts and with a giant pout. He looked like a child who had lost his favorite toy. Yes, in parts this was quite true. I ended up laughing at what I had thought, making Jenny look at me like I was crazy, but she ignored it and went into the guest room.

The visitors left later that same day. The farewell at the airport looked like a scene from a movie, and Jamie, although happy with the closeness of his sister and me, rolled his eyes several times saying that it was not the end of the world, that they were going to Scotland and not Japan. I knew this, but having a full house in those two days made me see how good it was to have a big family and how good it made me feel. Even more so when it managed to make my boyfriend angry, he hadn't liked it one bit when Jenny started telling embarrassing stories from his childhood and adolescence. But I had my revenge, he had had his fun at my parents' house at my expense, now it was my turn.

After the opening of the distillery, time seemed to fly by for us. Jamie spent all day at the office and we only saw each other in the evenings at the apartment. But I couldn't complain, he still gave me his full attention, often preparing dinner and massaging my feet that were getting more and more swollen by the end of the day. Of course, this led to some arguments. Jamie thought that I was spending too much time on my feet in the flower shop, that this was not good for me or the baby. That my headaches were getting more frequent and this was not normal.

I knew that I might be pushing my work intensity a little too hard. But I wanted to take advantage while the belly didn't prevent me from bending down to plant and try new flowers in the greenhouse, soon winter would begin and we had to get everything ready for our plants to resist the cold. I was past the 20th week of pregnancy and now Brianna was making a point of being present. Yes, Jamie was right and we were going to have a girl. Sometimes I thought I was pregnant with twins, but Gail had assured me there was only one baby in my belly, a very big girl, but then again what did I want? Look at the size of the father! Jamie got angry when I blamed him for this and claimed that I was not that small. This almost earned him a blow-dryer to the head, because I was already thinking I was huge and when he said it, I could have sworn he was referring to my weight.

“Sassenach, I am done fighting with ye about this. Can't ye stop being stubborn for once and listen to me? Stop by the office, ask Gail if this headache and swelling is normal. I ken ye think I'm being annoying and overprotective, but I've seen my sister pregnant more than once and she only got swollen towards the end of her pregnancy...”

“Jamie.” I interrupted him, prepared to tell him that this was all normal, that I was spending too many hours on my feet, but when I looked at him, I saw a desperation in his eyes that I had never seen before. He was really worried and suffering for it. “All right, tomorrow I'll call Gail and see if she can see me quickly at lunchtime. Happy?”

“Very much! But ye ken I'm going to call Mary to make sure ye do what ye promised.” he said as he massaged my foot.

“If Pierre is there, I can disappear and she won't even notice!”

“One more reason for me to call! I told ye I dinna trust that French guy, and Mary....”

“She's not as naive as you think!” he widened his eyes at what I said and we ended up laughing.

What he didn't know was that behind that laugh, I was more concerned about everything that was happening to my body than he realized. My headaches were constant as well as the swelling in my feet and hands. I also felt some abdominal pains, but I always thought it was because of something I had eaten too much. But I knew deep down that it could be something more than that, and I was scared to discover that Jamie's concern was justified.

_**POV Jamie** _

These last few months have been a roller coaster of emotions and it felt like I was living in an eternal loop where I can't be calm for a second. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about everything that has been happening to me, after all most things have been very good, but my heart was having trouble settling down amidst all the news. First was when I found out that I was really in love with my best friend, then when she not only told me that she loved me, but that she was expecting a child, that I would be a father! But that was not all, Claire surprised me every day, as did our daughter in her womb, Brianna.

When I heard that name coming out of my girlfriend's mouth, I didn't know if I could bear to say anything in return. How could all this be happening to me? A guy who until months ago didn't know what he wanted to do for the rest of his life, who thought he was unlucky in relationships, who had moved away from his family because he couldn't explain and deal with the loss of his father. The same guy who went into a flower shop thinking that he would only be there to occupy his time, that he would help someone with the damn motorcycle that cost him all his savings. But what that guy didn't know was that he would find in that place much more than he thought he was looking for.

Then knowing that Claire wanted to name our daughter after my father made this whole movie play in my head and it was the perfect ending. I was with the woman of my life, expecting the birth of my first daughter and with my dream job. What bad could happen? So far nothing, apart from constant arguments with Claire because of her stubborn belief that she was a superwoman and invincible. She really was an independent woman, strong and so many other qualities, but anyone could see that something was wrong.

Every day when I came home from the distillery, I would find her lying on the couch. She always claimed that it was just tiredness, that she was heavier now, and that taking care of the plants had always made her that way. But I could see in her narrowed eyes that she had a headache, that her swollen feet were bothering her, and that it was something constant. It wouldn't hurt her to stop by the office and talk to Gail, sometimes I was just being overprotective and it was a normal part of pregnancy, but what if it wasn't? Why stay in this doubt? Yes, she was in doubt too. Claire thought she could fool me, but I could see the same worry on her face as on mine, except that I also knew she was too stubborn to admit it. And fearful too.

After much insistence, she agreed to do what I was asking, and I went to work a little more relaxed. It would be nothing. Gail would calm her down, calm me down. We were just first time parents. But that thought went out of my mind as soon as my cell phone rang while I was eating lunch and I saw Claire's picture on the display. If everything was okay, she wouldn't call me, she knows I'm working, she would just text me with an emoji showing her tongue and telling me how right she was, that I worried over nothing. When I answered, her voice was low and I only heard the words, "Can you pick me up at Gail's office? She wants to talk to us."

I couldn't say anything in response, I just ran off in search of my helmet. I knocked things over on the way, I could hear Claire's voice calling me on the phone, but I just wanted to get on my bike and be by her side as soon as possible. My employees were thinking I was crazy, running down the hallways to the parking lot. But I knew that what Gail wanted to talk to us about was serious, Claire had the car, she didn't need me to pick her up, and any other medical advice she received, she could tell me about later. I probably broke some traffic laws, but in fifteen minutes I was across town and at the office.

I barged into the place like a madman, but was soon stopped by a pair of cold hands. Claire. She was sitting at the reception desk and with a weak smile on her face, she tried to calm me down with a kiss, but it was useless. I could see in her features that she was worried, however, before I could question her, Gail appeared and called us into her office. As I sat in the chair, my legs were restless and I squeezed Claire's hand for reassurance, but the waiting was agonizing for me. What did they want? To give me a heart attack?

“Jamie.” Gail called me in her usual calm voice. “I need you to calm down, Claire told me that you would probably be nervous about the call, but I only called you to explain the situation since you are as much a part of this pregnancy as Claire is.”

I took a deep breath and tried to put the most absurd ideas out of my head. My Sassenach was fine, so was Brianna. But why call me in to talk? Jamie Fraser, stop, just stop and listen to what Gail has to say. So I looked at the doctor and just nodded my head, giving her the signal to continue.

“Claire came into my office feeling a little sick, she had already called me and told me that she wanted to ask some questions in person, but while she was working, she felt sick so Mary brought her here.” When she finished saying this, I turned to Claire in despair, what do you mean she got sick and didn't tell me?

“Jamie, you were on the other side of town, I didn't want to worry you for nothing.” Claire said. Had I asked the question out loud?

“Sassenach, it was not for nothing, for God's sake, something could have happened, ye...”

“But it didn't, it was just high blood pressure.” she answered me as if it was nothing, but just then Gail coughed, drawing our attention.

“Claire, it wasn't just high blood pressure. Jamie was right to be concerned and to ask you to come to my office. I don't think I should extend myself and tell you what is going on. From all the symptoms you presented, such as the headache, swelling in your hands and feet, and the high blood pressure, I could diagnose that you are suffering from pre-eclampsia and we were lucky to find that out now. Because if your condition worsened to eclampsia, you and your baby would be at serious risk. But what does all this mean? That now you have to take a little more care of yourself. Eat low-salt foods, rest, and we will also increase the number of appointments. I want to keep an eye on this pressure so that we don't have any more risks.”

I sat still for a few seconds trying to absorb everything Gail had said. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know it could be something so frightening! I felt Claire's hand squeezing me again and I looked at her worriedly. She was trying to smile, trying to show that she was okay even though I knew she was not. We never expect this kind of problem, of course not, we always want the pregnancy to happen in a healthy way, but it is not always possible. Gail continued to explain a few more things, that the problem could be caused by a family history of hypertension, by the fetus being big, and other factors that I couldn't concentrate to hear.

“See, I told you it was your fault I was this big.” Claire spoke softly, trying to lighten the mood. I couldn't help but smile a little, yes, our daughter was big, but I could never think that this could cause problems.

“The important thing now is to take care of yourself. And no long hours in the flower shop, I know you are a workaholic, but you have to slow down a bit.”

“I told her so! But does she listen to me? Of course not! Why would she? I'm just the overprotective boyfriend!” I spoke a little upset and saw that Claire became serious again. Clearly she didn't like being called attention in front of the doctor.

“Jamie is right, Claire, slow down, I'm sure everything will be fine and in a few months we will welcome a big, healthy Brianna. I don't intend to see her before her time!”

I saw that Claire just nodded her head. We stayed in the office for a few more minutes while Gail gave us the last recommendations and scheduled the next appointment. When we were finally released, we walked in silence to the door of the clinic. But the moment we set foot outside, Claire let go of my hand and started talking non-stop.

“I already know, Jamie, you were right, there was something wrong with me and I ignored it. You don't have to throw in my face that I'm a terrible mother, irresponsible and who only thinks about work when I should be worrying about my daughter who hasn't even been born yet, but who has already given me the biggest scare and the worst of it is that it was all my fault!” she finished speaking and crossed her arms in front of her chest, as if she was trying to protect herself from my attack.

“Sassenach...” I said trying to uncross her arms to hug her, but she refused my touch. – “Claire! Nothing is yer fault, ye heard what Gail said, it could be family history or... what matters is that ye were diagnosed before it got worse. Sassenach, ye dinna ken how scared and desperate I was to see yer picture appear on my cell phone. I already knew something was wrong and imagined the worst. But ye're here in front of me, ye're fine, Brianna's fine, and now I just want ye to take care of yourself so that everything stays that way...promise that now ye'll listen to me and slow down a little?” I said as I tried to hug her again, but now she opened her arms and welcomed me.

I could feel her tears on my shirt, so I began to run my hand through her hair and whisper words in Gaelic that meant nothing to her, but that calmed her down. After a few minutes of standing there like that, a cold wind seemed to wake us up and we decided it was time to go home. We took a cab, because Mary had taken the car away and I would not leave Claire alone now, much less make her ride a motorcycle. This was already impossible with the size of her belly. When we arrived at our apartment, I made my Sassenach take a hot bath while I prepared something for her to eat. We both skipped lunch and were starving now that the scare had passed.

The next few days were ones of change. I managed to convince Claire that the best thing to do was to make Mary the manager of the flower shop and let her take care of most things. Not that she hadn't been the manager before, but now it would be official and with Henry's help, we implemented a new system that would make their lives easier in the shop. Another change was to expand the space in the flower shop a little. Claire's old office was dismantled and after some walls were knocked down, we created a new work space for my Sassenach to be comfortable, seated and with a large counter where she could assemble the arrangements as well as prepare some pots for planting.

It all sounds easy talking this way, but having a girlfriend as stubborn as I am did not make all these changes any easier. Convincing her to spend less time in that uncomfortable greenhouse and hiring a helper for the heavy work was one of my most difficult missions. And one of the most irritating too. I took an afternoon off from the distillery to help Claire interview some job applicants. Yes, they were all women, no need for another man around besides Pierre, who was a headache enough as it was. Worse, I was the one who had recommended him! I would not make that mistake again, and you can say what you want, yes, I am jealous of my girls.

But back to the interviews, Claire found flaws in all of them, asking the most absurd questions to a person who would only help her to put soil in the pots and water the plants. How hard could that be? Yeah, I shouldn't have said that out loud, I had to listen to a long speech about how she never came to my distillery to say how hard it was to just put liquid in a barrel and wait years to consume it. And this time not even my kiss worked to shut her up. Even more so when she thought I had noticed too much the cleavage of the last girl who had been interviewed. She was wearing a button down blouse, after all, it was practically winter.

“And how did you know that her blouse was buttoned up to her neck? Obviously, you were looking at her breasts!”

“Sassenach, there was no way not to notice her blouse! She was sitting right in front of us! And what breasts? She didn't even have any!” hum, my mistake. The look I got could have killed me.

“And then you say that you weren't looking, but you could see the design of the blouse, as well as the size of the bra!” that wasn't the time to say that the girl wasn't wearing one, was it? “I told you, you have to talk by looking at our faces!”

“Ye that it is getting really hard to talk to without noticing other things.” I said as I looked at Claire's breasts that always seemed to want to stand out in her blouses.

I got a slap on the arm and a roll of the eyes. It turned out that two hours later, she hired the first interviewee, who wasn't that young anymore and didn't really wear any cleavage at all. I was not the only jealous one around. With the same intensity that she had fought with me that afternoon, she made up with me in the evening. It wasn't easy to deal with Claire's sudden mood swings, but I couldn't tell her I wasn't happy to see her carrying our daughter and still loving me every day. Because I knew it wasn't easy for her either.

She was doing her best to follow orders to take it easy at work and watch her diet. Of course it was getting difficult with each passing day, with each week of pregnancy that she completed. Time was flying by and when we least expected it, December arrived and so did the cold. Leaving the house was impractical for Claire, who now carried a huge belly and zero desire to go down and up the stairs of the building. Someone could only have warned me that pregnant women feel absurdly hot even when it's less than 10 degrees outside and don't want to turn up the heat on the radiator.

The result? I was walking around the house in sweaters while Claire was wearing a dress and complaining that I was the most fake Scot she had ever met. How could I be that cold? Well, it was another one of the many mornings when I was lying on the couch. Aye, I had been kicked out of bed because she said there was no room, I was too warm, and she couldn't sleep. Like I was saying, it was just another morning when I heard my name called in a scream. That wasn't the way she called me when she was angry, she hadn't said Fraser, just Jamie and in a way that was almost desperate.

I jumped up and ran to our bedroom. When I entered I saw that Claire was standing in the bathroom doorway and a puddle of water was under her feet. Her eyes were frightened, staring at me as if waiting for a miracle to come from me. No, it couldn't be, it was too soon. Brianna wasn't due for two months, until February. But Claire's scream calling me once again made me realize that our daughter didn't like to follow the right order of things as well as her parents.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, but I hope you enjoys this new chapter!

_**POV Claire** _

Deep down I knew something was wrong, I knew there was something about that pregnancy that was not in line with everything I read on the various websites I searched for information on, but I was afraid to find out that I had done something that had harmed our Brianna. So I spent the next day after my conversation with Jamie staring at my cell phone to call Gail. I knew I would get a scolding for the long hours at work, I knew she would be angry that I hadn't contacted her sooner, but I never imagined that I would need Mary to drive me to her office.

I was making some arrangements when the headache started to bother me. I tried to ignore it as I always did, but it was strong. So strong that I couldn't concentrate on what was in front of me, my vision almost blurred, making it impossible for me to continue with my work. I just needed to sit down for a while, have a glass of water and take a deep breath. That was it. But when I went to get some water, I felt a pain in my chest and it scared the hell out of me. What was happening? Was I having a heart attack? No, no, that couldn't happen, the baby...Brianna....

And that's how Mary found me, I was screaming desperately for my daughter's name while going through a mild panic attack. She immediately ran to get the car keys and yelled for me to take a deep breath, that we were going to the doctor. I needed to warn Jamie, his voice would calm me down...but then I thought better and decided not to scare him, he would drop everything at work to go with me to Gail's and I couldn't do that to him. For a moment I thought I was feeling better, it was just a scare, I wasn't having a heart attack, it was just a strong anxiety attack caused by this stubborn baby.

But Mary ignored everything I was saying and dragged me to the car. She didn't care if I was better, she claimed that she had never seen me like that, with such a scared expression that she was desperate. Yeah, I guess I had scared my friend. But who was I kidding? I was scared too, I just didn't want to admit it. We got to the office very quickly and I marveled at Mary's driving skills, she parked with an ease that I absolutely did not have. But she didn't want to hear any compliments about it, just desperately pulled me by the arm to Gail's office, who was already waiting for me with a worried look on her face.

After answering all the several questions and being examined almost inside out, I received a look that I knew very well, after all I grew up around doctors. I knew when they had something unpleasant to say. She told me a few things in advance, but she wanted me to call Jamie, that he had to be there to know my diagnosis and receive the directions she had to give. I swallowed hard, I knew he would not react well to what had happened, I knew he would blame me, saying that he already knew something was wrong, that I had not been careful when he asked me incisively to go see what was going on. As usual he answered quickly and when I spoke the words in a tone that I knew was nowhere near my normal one, he hung up without saying a word.

I don't know if it was because I was nervous, but it seemed that Jamie arrived in less than fifteen minutes at the office. He came in like a madman, his face totally dismayed, and my heart squeezed to see him like that. When I touched him, I saw that he was startled, but we barely had time to talk, as Gail wasted no time in getting us to her office. And there were the longest minutes of my life. Seeing the way Jamie reacted to every word my doctor said, made me sadder and sadder, I knew I had let him down and I knew how much I would hear from him later. But of course I was wrong again about my boyfriend's reaction. He had been worried, yes, scared about what might have happened, but he didn't blame me, he didn't throw everything I had done wrong in my face and just comforted me while I let out all the tears and apprehension I had felt since I arrived at that doctor's office.

The following months were hard. Really hard. But if you ask Jamie, he will tell you that I was the one who was making his life hell and that I was never happy with anything. But then again, did he always have to be in my way? Always make the inappropriate remarks or answer things I didn't want answered? It was already being difficult for me to stay home longer and delegate more of the flower shop stuff to Mary and my new assistant, Glenda. Even with the changes we had made in the shop, it was becoming more and more difficult for me to stay long hours in the same position and in a place where the temperature was not at all pleasant for a pregnant woman with unregulated hormones. Another reason for fighting at home was at bedtime. Jamie liked to stay close to me, something I had always liked a lot, but now it was not something I wanted. Besides, we were both big, Jamie in height and I in width. Okay, I was tall too, nothing like my giant Scot, but different from most women. Now add that to my seven month belly, it made it impossible to sleep in a comfortable way. Why didn't I agree when Jamie proposed buying a king-size bed when we moved into this apartment?

After several discussions, my annoyed boyfriend started sleeping in the guest room. But he soon moved to the living room, claiming that if he was going to sleep alone, he preferred the big comfortable sofa to my uncle's old spring bed. He was right, the bed was small by today's standards and for a giant Scot who stood with his feet out. On another day of our somewhat different routine, I got up to go to the bathroom for the thousandth time that morning when I felt a sharp pain. Hum, it was something normal at the end of pregnancy, wasn't it? Many pregnant women had false contractions. Nothing to panic about. I walked some more and now the pain came much stronger. I took a deep breath and bit my lips to keep from screaming, I didn't want to wake Jamie.

I tried to pee normally, after all I had gotten up because of this, but the pain came again and this time I couldn't hold on, screaming and leaning on the bathroom wall. I heard a noise coming from the living room and knew that my boyfriend had woken up and heard me. His quick footsteps brought him into the room and just as I thought about opening my mouth to calm him down, telling him that these were just false contractions, I felt as if I had peed myself. I looked down and it wasn't what I thought, my water broke, no, no, that was wrong, it wasn't time yet, it was too early, it wasn't Brianna's time. When I saw Jamie standing in front of me with the same desperate look on his face as mine, I knew that even though it was out of time, our daughter was coming and we needed to do something.

I hadn't packed anything yet, I thought we had time, that I didn't need to leave everything ready so far in advance, but it seems I was wrong and now I was nervous not knowing what to do first. One thing was certain, I couldn't go to the hospital like that, I needed a shower and a change of clothes. Only Jamie didn't seem to have the same opinion as me and was desperate to put on the first outfit he saw in front of me.

“Jamie...” I tried to call him calmly while still leaning on the bathroom door. But he didn't look at me, he was concentrating on trying to pull up the zipper of his jeans that didn't seem to obey his trembling hands. “Jamie!” I called out one more time, and the only response I got was muttering in Gaelic. “Fraser!” I screamed out of patience as I felt another contraction. At the same moment he lifted his head and looked at me startled. “Now that I have your attention, I need your help. I'm not going to the hospital like this and we need to pack up Brianna's things...”

“But Sassenach, we dinna have time, ye are...”

“I'm fine, Jamie. We have time and I'm not going to the hospital like a crazy person, but I can't do everything myself, so I need you to stop worrying about zipping up this damn thing and do what I ask!” I was out of patience at the end of the sentence and I knew that it wasn't his fault, that it was normal for him to worry like that, but I couldn't control my emotions any longer.

I saw that he took a deep breath and approached me carefully. I slowly told him what I wanted him to do while I poured some water over my body. He didn't want to leave me alone, but we needed to split up so that we didn't waste any more time than necessary. After giving him all the instructions, Jamie disappeared down the hallway, probably heading to our daughter's room where her things were. I took a deep breath and walked slowly to the bathroom stall, I knew I didn't need to walk like that, but I was too scared to make any sudden movements in a hurry. I turned on the shower and took off the shirt I was wearing. When I finally got under the water, I heard Jamie's footsteps, probably going to ask me something about the clothes I had asked him to sort.

But he didn't, he grabbed the handheld shower and started to help me take a shower. I opened my mouth to protest, but immediately felt the pain return and could only thank him for being there, calming me with his strong hands and soft words in Gaelic. A few minutes later I was dressed, as was Jamie, and hand in hand we went to the car. I was surprised to see that everything was already inside, just as I had asked. This boyfriend of mine couldn't surprise me anymore. I had already called Gail before I left the house, who calmed me down and told me that everything would be fine. I was in doubt as to whether I should tell my parents, but Jamie had been quicker than me and when we arrived at the hospital we found my mother and father anxiously waiting for us.

From that moment on, everything happened so fast that it seemed like being in a movie. But no, this was real life, my life and my daughter's life. I didn't even have to look for my doctor when I arrived, she was already waiting for me with Joe by her side. He wasn't there on business, he was there as a friend not only to me, but to my father. Soon I was taken to a room where I was quickly examined, proving that Brianna would indeed be born. The problem was that even with the contractions, I was not dilated enough for a natural birth and with all the circumstances involving my health and the baby's, they decided for a C-section. And that wouldn't take long to happen. All the while, even with all the commotion around me, my only constant was Jamie's hand that would not leave mine. That was what calmed me down in the face of all that was happening.

While they were preparing me for the delivery, Gail tried to calm me down, but it was hard to be calm knowing that my daughter, my Brianna, would be born at only 29 weeks. It was too soon, not what we had planned. I knew all the dangers of a premature birth and without being able to control myself, tears streamed down my face at the thought that something could happen to her. I felt Jamie's fingers wiping my tears away and that's when I realized that he was as worried as I was. Of course he was, he was the father, Brianna was not only mine, but his too. More tears fell as I realized how selfish I was being in my pain, in my suffering. Jamie was suffering too and I hadn't stopped for a moment to comfort him:

“Sassenach, it's going to be okay, I'm not leaving yer side and we're going to see our Brianna for the first time together.” he spoke as he tried once more to wipe away my tears.

And he kept his promise. The only time he left my side was when he had to put on all his clothes so that he could attend the birth and be with me in the operating room. The weeks of waiting seemed nothing compared to the anxiety I was feeling at that moment. Jamie's hands were cold as he tried in vain to calm me down during the birth, which was much faster than I imagined. Gail was a spectacular doctor and was narrating everything that was happening to the first time parents. And at 11:45 AM on December 15th, Brianna Ellen Beauchamp Fraser came into the world weighing in at 1.500kg and 42cm. She was small, very small and fragile. My heart squeezed to see her like that, but a small smile formed on my lips when Gail let me kiss my daughter's cheek before she was taken to the neonatal ICU.

My eyes were heavy, I was tired and because of the anesthesia, I knew I would sleep soon. But first I could hear that our daughter was doing well even though her lungs were not yet fully formed. Jamie asked the medical staff a few more questions, but all I could think about was how strong our little girl would have to be in the coming days, how she would have to fight to get well so that she could go home into our arms. They were leading me back to the room when I felt Jamie's hand squeeze mine and speak quickly into my ear.

“Sassenach, our Brianna is beautiful and I'm sure she's going to be the sensation of the ICU with that tuft of red hair.” I smiled as I remembered our daughter's face and she really would be a hit, she was just like her father! And with a smile on my face, I fell asleep thinking about the miracle that the two of us had performed.

_**POV Jamie** _

When I envisioned the birth of our daughter, at no time did I imagine it would be this way. I thought we would have time, that we would be able to finish her room calmly and add all the details that Claire was still in doubt about. The garden that we had started to paint on the bedroom walls was still incomplete when we left the house to go to the hospital. And it would remain incomplete for a few more days until its main flower was finally there to brighten it up. Brianna Ellen Beauchamp Fraser was born at only 29 weeks, so the name she bore already showed that she was a perfect mixture of stubbornness and anxiety, something her parents had plenty of.

We had not yet decided her full name when I was surprised by my Sassenach once again. They were taking our little girl to the ICU when they asked if we had a name, and that's when the words came out of Claire's lips with a naturalness I hadn't expected and I was speechless for a few seconds until I opened a smile even bigger than the one that was already present on my face. My chest was exploding with happiness, I had officially become a father. Not that I didn't already consider myself one before the birth, but seeing such a small and fragile baby in the doctor's hands only made me believe that I had finally become the happiest person in the world and responsible for loving my daughter so much. My daughter who needed all the strength at the moment to overcome the difficulties that were presented to her. 

Gail quickly explained what would happen next, that our daughter would be taken to the neonatal ICU to stay in the incubator. She needed to be intubated to get help breathing, her lungs were not yet fully formed and this was critical for her to survive. She said a few more things, but I couldn't pay attention to everything, I was just trying to imagine what it would be like for Brianna to be there alone and not know that she had a mother and father who cared and loved her so much. My only question was about when we could visit her and the nurse who was taking her, promptly replied that we had two different times, 11am and 5pm. For a moment my heart squeezed knowing that we still had long hours to go before the first visit, but looking at the sleepy Claire in front of me, I knew that she needed those hours of rest.

I also knew that Claire was as worried as I was, or even more so. Every mother dreams of the moment when she holds her baby on her arms, when the strong bond they already had in the womb becomes even stronger in person. But Claire wouldn't have that now, wouldn't have our daughter on her arms, feeding for the first time and meeting the mother she had heard talking to her so many times. I took a deep breath, I couldn't weaken now, not in front of Claire. She needed me now more than ever, and she needed me whole. And that's what I would do. I squeezed her hand tightly and whispered in her ear how beautiful our daughter was, even more so with that red hair that set her apart from all the other babies. My Sassenach gave me a beautiful smile before falling asleep.

They took her to the room where she would recover from the birth. I ran to the hospital reception where the grandparents were worried and anxious for news. But by the time I got there they were looking calmer and talking to Joe. Of course, how could I be innocent enough to think that Henry Beauchamp would not use his position as a neurosurgeon to find out news about his daughter and granddaughter? When they saw me, I was greeted with very warm hugs and congratulations on having such a beautiful daughter. Had they seen her? But how? Noticing my curious and amazed look, Julia spoke up.

“Joe and Henry managed to get a peek at Brianna when they took her to the ICU. You know how insistent Claire's father can be, he wanted to know how his granddaughter was doing and he went out of his way to do it.” she smiled at me. “Would you like some coffee to try to relax a little? I know how stressful everything that happened can be. And we still have a long way to go.” and in a comforting voice, she put her hand on my shoulder.

I was opening my mouth to answer that I was fine, when I felt my cell phone ring in my pocket. I had just picked up my things after taking off the hospital clothes that I had worn to enter the surgical center. It was my sister and I bit my lip as I remembered that with all the rush of recent events I had forgotten to tell her, but when I answered the call, she already started asking questions about how her niece was doing and wouldn't let me talk. How did she know Brianna was born?

“Mary texted us, ye airhead! Because if I were to rely on my own brother, I would be the last to ken!”

“I'm sorry if in the midst of everything that happened with Claire and my daughter, I couldn't remember to get my cell phone and tell my sister!” I spoke a little irritated and regretted it, she was right, I had completely forgotten to warn her while Claire remembered her parents.

“I'm going to ignore that tone of yers because I ken ye must have had a hard time, and I ken it's not over yet, so brother, I just want to ken… are ye okay?” Sitting on a chair in the corner of the hospital reception, I let out everything I was feeling. The tears came out without me being able or willing to control them. The words didn't make sense, but I wanted to try to explain to my sister what had been stuck inside me since I saw Claire standing in our bathroom doorway with a worried look on her face.

And this time it was me who was comforted with words in Gaelic that I knew made no sense to others, but that my sister knew was what I needed to hear at that moment. After a few minutes, I took a deep breath and tried to control the sobs that insisted on coming out along with the few tears that still streamed down my face. I took a deep breath and finally calmed down. Wiping away the tears, I tried not to raise my head, I knew that people were looking at me. Saying goodbye to my sister with promises of pictures of her niece when I could send them, I stood up to face the scenery around me. But to my surprise, I found no one staring or judging me. Claire's parents were in the other corner of the room having coffee and talking to Joe. The few other people present there seemed more concerned with their own problems to judge a crying parent.

I needed to get back to the room, I knew that Claire would not wake up for the next few hours, but I needed to be by her side. But this time I would not be alone, Julia and Henry wanted to see how their daughter was doing and they came with me to the room. Being a doctor, Henry seemed very calm about everything that was happening, always stopping along the way to talk to people he knew and that calmed me down. If he was sure that things were going well, I would believe him and try to calm down a little more. But when I saw Claire lying in bed and an empty crib beside her, my heart squeezed again. It wasn't supposed to be like this, it was supposed to be our daughter sleeping next to her, it was supposed to be me holding her on my arms for the first time while her mother rested.

“James, I know you may not believe my words now, but Claire is strong and so stubborn that I'm sure if Brianna took a bit of that, she will face this challenge masterfully. You'll be fine!” Henry said, patting my back lightly with his hand. “Now we'll let you rest so you can visit your daughter later, I'm sure she'll be happy.”

And with a slight smile on his face, he pulled his wife close to him, soon leaving me alone in the room with Claire. She looked so serene in her sleep that I sat down in the small armchair in the corner and admired her. The next few days would be difficult, but she was not alone, I would be by her side in every stage of this struggle that would be our daughter's development. The hours passed slowly until my Sassenach woke up and when she did, we couldn't help but fall into tears once again when she saw the empty crib in the room. Or when the nurse came into the room empty-handed and we heard crying from another baby in the hallway who was being carried to a mother.

But our expressions changed when Gail entered the room with that smile on her face that we already knew so well. She had good news. Even though visiting hours in the neonatal ICU were still a little way off, she had managed to get us in. Of course Henry Beauchamp had something to do with it, he was chief surgeon in that hospital and had a good influence. For safety's sake, they had brought a wheelchair for Claire, even though she stubbornly insisted that she was able to walk. Stubborn as always, but I couldn't help but smile at the thought that we would see our little one and finally be able to touch her, to feel her. I knew Claire felt the same way, her hands were cold showing that she was clearly anxious as we made our way to the ICU.

When we arrived, I saw a wall next to the door with pictures of several babies that had been there. My heart squeezed again as I imagined the number of parents who had gone through what we were going through now. I took a deep breath and tried to adjust my vision to the dim light there. We were told that the visit would only last 30 minutes and that the next day we could bring Brianna's things for the nurses to use for her bath. They also asked Claire to try her best to get the milk out so that our daughter could be fed, even if by tube, by her mother. I saw that Claire's eyes were not focused on the nurse in front of us but on the small incubator to our right.

After all the instructions, we were led to where our daughter was and when I saw the little tuft of red hair, my heart stopped beating for a few seconds. She was so small, her skin so pale that I could see all her veins, but even with all that fragility, she was beautiful. Perfect. While noticing all the details of our little one who was wearing only a diaper that looked huge on her, Claire was already with her hand in the small hole in the incubator and when she touched Brianna's little hand, I couldn't help but hear her relieved cry when she felt our daughter. I let her have that moment alone, without my interruption, I knew how much she needed that, to feel that connection that only a mother had with her child.

But she soon raised her head and with her eyes still watery, called me to touch our daughter for the first time. I didn't know why I was shaking so much, but I had a hard time putting my hand in that small hole, but when I did and felt our daughter's soft and delicate skin, my legs didn't seem to want to obey me and I fell on my knees in front of Claire's chair. She smiled at me and asked me to take a deep breath, that everything would be fine. And that's when I felt Brianna's hand squeeze my finger. How could such a small baby be so strong?

“She's going to be a daddy's girl for sure.” Claire laughed through tears at this scene. I couldn't help but do the same.

The half hour with our daughter went by very fast, but this only gave us more strength to hold on until the next day. And that was our routine for the next almost thirty days as our daughter only got stronger. Of course coming home when Claire was discharged was not as we had imagined, the apartment was empty, without the baby crying that we had so hoped for and that was not easy. Several times I found Claire in Brianna's room sitting in the nursing armchair, crying while hugging some stuffed animal that decorated the place. I also saw her despair at the realization that her milk was drying up, even though she made the effort to get as much as she could out of it to take to our daughter in the hospital.

It was hard, but I knew I had to be strong for both of us. I knew that we would have to try to keep our routine at work to a minimum so that we wouldn't go crazy in the house, I knew that after every hospital visit we were one step closer to bringing our daughter home. And I also knew that if we survived as a couple at that moment, we would be able to face anything that might come our way. The holidays passed by unnoticed for us, we didn't want to celebrate with our families and they respected this, even though they didn't agree. But we preferred to use the little time we had with our little one to celebrate the beginning of another year, the year that our life had changed completely, the year that we would have a little redhead terrorizing the house, but we couldn't wait for it to happen.

And as if it were a New Year's gift, we received the news that our Brianna was already weighing two kilos and would be moved to her room. We knew she would make it and even before Gail's prediction. But of course she would go against all predictions, she had already done that with her anticipated birth and now it would be no different. We couldn't contain our joy at finally being able to take our daughter home and seeing my Sassenach carrying Brianna on her arms with a smile on her face made me sure that I really was the happiest man in the world with the love of my girls.


	29. Chapter 29

_**POV Claire** _

I was having a good, very good dream. I was lying on a lawn, the day was sunny, and I could feel a gentle breeze that lifted my dress slightly. And then some butterflies started to wander over my body, tickling my legs and I couldn't help but smile. But soon I felt something more intense on the inside of my thigh and it was then that I realized that this was no longer a dream and what was between my legs were not butterflies but a redhead with an unshaven beard.

“Jamiee...” I whispered as I tried to open my eyes. He didn't stop what he was doing, on the contrary, he intensified his movements and I could only enjoy it. There was no point in trying to go against what he was doing, my hands gripped the headboard firmly as soon as I felt my Scot reach the point I wanted him to.

“Daaaaaa!” and with that shout, our bedroom door was abruptly opened.

My eyes widened in fright and the only reaction I had was to throw the heavy blanket over Jamie who was still between my legs and try to pretend I was stretching when our little redhead burst into our room without asking permission. Bree never knocked, even though we had explained several times that she should do it when she sees our bedroom door closed.

“Where's Da?” she asked, seeing me alone on the bed. At that very moment I felt Jamie squeezing me and I stopped the scream that almost came out of my mouth. Bloody Scot, I knew he was enjoying himself in this situation, without the slightest bit of shame!

“He...” but I didn't know what to say. And I didn't have to think anymore, as Jamie emerged from under the covers with a silly grin on his face.

“Da? Why were you hiding?” Bree asked innocently as she climbed into bed.

“Because Mama was sick and I was playing with her to make her feel better.” he smiled at me as he pulled our daughter to sit between us.

“Sick? Mama, is better now?” she asked, putting her hand on my face and caressing it. Even though I wanted to hit Jamie for saying that, I couldn't resist those blue eyes staring at me with such love and concern. Did she have to take this charm from her father? It was impossible not to melt.

“Yes, I'm better, Bree, but getting a kiss from you would make me even better!”

She flashed a smile forming the dimple I loved so much and gave me a lingering kiss on my cheek. But before I could return the kiss, she turned her attention back to her father and began talking non-stop about the ride they were going to go on later. Every Saturday morning, Jamie took Bree riding at the stables in Hyde Park. I always went along, but my presence was soon ignored as our daughter met up with her grandfather and Marshmallow, the horse she got from my father on her second birthday. Yes, she had named it after her favorite candy, much to Jamie's disappointment as he wanted a more serious and Scottish name.

Of course my daughter was extremely spoiled by her grandparents who surprised me every day by doing things they had never done to me, but didn't think twice about doing for their granddaughter. Bree was too small to ride the horse by herself, even though she was a big girl for her three years old, she was still far from being able to reach Marshmallow's reins. So Jamie had the bright idea to ride with her on his lap. And what happened? She loved it, of course! Now every weekend we had to take her riding for hours, but what surprised me the most was that my father not only came every Saturday, but also rode with Jamie. I didn't even know that he enjoyed or had the ability for such a thing. Apparently there were many things I didn't know about my parents' lives and their granddaughter was making them show more of their hidden side every day.

After the scare that morning, I managed to calm Brianna's enthusiasm and took her to put on her special riding outfit. She loved wearing all the clothes that Jamie had bought for her and that I braided her hair, which was now longer than I would have liked for her age, but how could I dare cut those beautiful red curls? When she was ready, I handed her the tablet that she could only watch on weekends, and asked her to wait in the living room while Jamie and I got ready for the long day ahead of us.

“How many times have I told you to lock the bedroom door when we're doing grown-up things?” I said as I entered the bathroom where Jamie had just finished showering.

“Adult stuff? Sassenach, did we already turn into those parents who can't talk normally even away from their children? And at that moment I didna think about this little detail of locking the door, my mind was elsewhere...” and laughed.

“Idiot...but you know our daughter, she took your side of the family, the one that doesn't know what privacy is! But I have to be thankful that she is at least a little bit like me and not at all discreet when she gets somewhere, otherwise I'd like to see you try to explain what you were doing to her mother!”

“I was just making Mama happy!” he laughed and smacked my butt on the way to the bedroom.

“Jamie!” I yelled, but I knew that the discussion would end there. At least if I didn't want to provoke the wrath of an anxious little redhead and delay Saturday's ride.

When we arrived at the stable, my father was already there talking to Rupert who was getting Marshmallow ready for his big ride that day. Of course, when Bree saw her grandfather, she ran away from us and ran towards him, shouting "Grandpa". And she was scolded by Jamie's cousin, who had already taught her that she couldn't shout like that inside the stable, because it would scare the horses. She quickly put her hand over her mouth and apologized, but couldn't contain the small screams when she felt her horse greeting her in a warm way. There was no way not to laugh at that scene, our little girl could make our hair stand on end most of the time, but her friendliness melted our hearts.

As they rode along, I sat down in my usual spot to wait and take some pictures of this family moment. Seeing my two favorite redheads together and laughing about something my dad was saying brought a huge smile to my face. When I first met Jamie I could never have imagined a scene like this before my eyes, but now it was part of my routine and I couldn't help but be thankful. Anyone who saw Bree now could not imagine that she had spent almost a month in the hospital as soon as she was born, and she was so small, so fragile. But now she was a restless little girl and her father's copy in every way. Jamie insisted that she had several things from me, like her curly hair, the freckles on her face, and her stubbornness. As if he wasn't stubborn! And to think that I suffered for months carrying this giant baby in my belly to be the spitting image of her father.

I laughed as I remembered when I told this to Jenny the first time, and she agreed, saying that she had suffered from the same problem with wee Jamie, who only carried the same name as his uncle, because otherwise he was Ian's copy. And it was true, the two were quite similar, even though the father denied it, saying that he had the same strong genius as the Frasers. Yes, this family was very dominant and as my father once said, my Scotsman was good at what he did. I laughed again. I took a few more pictures of the three of them riding and when I saw Bree clinging to her father, I remembered the first visit we made to our daughter, when she was still in the incubator and held tightly to Jamie's hand. That day I already knew that the two of them would be very close, and the next three years proved me right.

I turned out to be the mother I always swore I wouldn't be. The one who always had to call her attention, the one who had to ground her, the one who sent her to take a bath or a nap while her father was the one who carried her on his shoulders for walks in the park, the one who gave her candy during the week, the one who took her to work and let her crush grapes with her foot, causing laughter and several stained clothes. Oh yes, now the Frasers' distillery produced wine too, in small batches, special editions that came from grapes that Sarah, my friend, had helped grow at her new job. And what was the name of the wine? Sassenach, of course! But not only that, Jamie had put Little Sassenach, a mix between English and Scottish Gaelic, which was nothing more than our Brianna.

The ride ended after a few hours and as it always did, with tears and screams from Bree who didn't want to say goodbye to Marshmallow. As always Jamie tried to talk to our little one, but that day she seemed to be more restless and stubborn than usual, continuing with her crying even after her father used every argument in his repertoire.

“A leannan...” Jamie said as he bent down to stand at our daughter's height, who was sobbing and talking non-stop that she didn't want to leave. “Ye already ken that we can't stay any longer, that Marshmallow needs to rest and have lunch. The same as ye.” he spoke calmly as he tried to wipe the tears from Bree's face.

“No Da!” she shouted, pulling away from her father. “I want more! I don't want to leave!” and stamped her feet on the ground, as if giving her father an order.

I thought about interfering, she was already going too far with this whim, but I knew that this was a father-daughter argument. My father and I just stood by and watched as I noticed Jamie's expression turn serious and knew that Bree had pocked the bear.

“Brianna Ellen!” he spoke loudly, catching our daughter's attention and her big blue eyes widened. She was used to me calling her that when I was angry, but her father had never gone that far before. “Stomping yer feet and talking to yer father like that is not going to get ye what ye want! I told ye the ride is over, and if ye keep being so rude, I won't bring ye here to hang out with Marshmallow anymore!”

“But Da...” she tried to speak and I was impressed by her stubbornness in rebutting her father's scolding.

“But nothing! Dinna ye want to show Da that ye are grown up and can take care of yer horse by yourself? Yelling and crying is a very ugly thing to do.”

She then looked at me and at Grandpa. She received disapproving looks from both of us and then looked back at her father, who was staring at her seriously. Still sobbing from the crying that had stopped minutes before, she stretched her arms out for a hug from Jamie and whispered "I'm sorry”. Of course, Dad accepted her request and hugged her tightly, speaking to her in Gaelic softly. Jamie insisted that he would teach Bree to speak Gaelic, just as Brian had done with him. And she was a fast learner, which sometimes frustrated me for not understanding what they were talking about. I was terrible at learning this language, even though Jamie always spoke it to me.

After everything was settled and peace restored in the small Fraser family, we went to have lunch at my parents' house, as we always did. My mother was already waiting for her granddaughter with her favorite food and all the other treats she could get. Now going to their house was something totally different, the usual protocols had been thrown out the window as soon as that little redhead invaded the halls of that place. And I couldn't help but be thankful that now I could stay for hours at my parents' house without feeling pressured or criticized by them. Of course not everything was perfect, we still had arguments, only now they all revolved around our daughter and how she should be raised. In the end, Jamie would fill my father's glass with his favorite whisky and propose a toast in which he knew very well how to make the proud grandparents totally sorry for anything they had said. At those times I was thankful that my Scot was so good with words, but only at those times...

_**POV Jamie** _

A hurricane. That's what our daughter was, but how could she be any different? As a child I gave my parents more trouble than they could ever imagine, always spending more time grounded than playing. From the several stories I heard about Claire's childhood, she was also not a quiet child who took no for an answer. So the combination of the two of us resulted in a little redheaded girl who turned our house upside down, but who at the same time made us laugh like fools when she achieved something for the first time. Of course we were proud to see that that baby who was born prematurely, so small and fragile, was now a three year old girl who was the tallest child on the playground she played on and who made her presence felt with her high, high-pitched voice. And I must also say that she excelled at using Gaelic when she was angry and didn't want anyone to understand her. Claire did not like this one bit and blamed me every time for doing the same and teaching this to our daughter.

Brianna would not start school until the beginning of the next year, so until that day came, Claire and I split up to take care of her. Her grandparents were a great help on the weekends, but with their profession it was almost impossible to take care of Bree on the other days and even though they insisted that they would pay for a nanny, we preferred to have her stay with us longer. Which I can admit we regretted a little as she started to get older, smarter and not at all willing to sit or sleep while Claire and I worked.

This week she was going with Claire to the flower shop, as I had several meetings with important clients and John Grey was a terrible person to take care of our little girl. Not in the sense you might imagine, he loved children and therefore easily surrendered to the charm of Bree's blue eyes and perfect smile, making all her wishes come true while I was away. One of the days I left her with him, after much insistence from John, the outcome was a girl with energy to spare after eating practically all the sweets in London.

The problem was not even that she had the brilliant idea to play ball in my office and John created a game in which anything she hit would win a chocolate. The problem was going home with her after that. Claire still reminds me every day of that night, the night we stayed up late because of a little girl who couldn't sleep, the night that same little girl jumped up and down on our bed without wanting to go to her own room and then got sick with a stomachache and cried, a lot. So I decided that the best thing to do when I had full days at the distillery, was to let Claire take her to the flower shop. There was Mary with endless patience to answer all Bree's questions, as well as running after her when she insisted that she wanted to help her mother with the flowers.

The Sassenach flower shop was now bigger, the building next door had been empty as soon as Brianna was born and I knew this was the time we had to expand the business. Claire was at home and could not go to the construction site every day, so Henry and I were free to put our project into practice. I can't say it was easy, hiding something like this from my Sassenach was practically impossible, but in the end it was more than satisfying to see her excitement at seeing a shop worthy of a magazine cover, a flower shop that had nothing fancy like other more famous ones, but that with the good taste of the owner drew the attention of anyone passing on the street.

With increased demand, Claire was forced to hire more employees and this took a great deal of the burden off her duties at the shop. But of course she didn't stop working every day, keeping up to date with everything that was going on and checking all the flowers, arrangements and orders that came out of there. Mary continued as manager and to my disappointment, with Pierre by her side. Don't get me wrong, I was happy that she had finally found someone to share her life and to love her. But did he have to stay there every day? And become an administrative assistant in my girlfriend's flower shop? That smile and that damned French accent that he made sure not to lose even though he had been living in London for almost ten years did not convince me. And don't tell me that I also have an accent even though I no longer live in Scotland, they are completely different things, I never used it to win Claire over. Ok, maybe I did a little bit...

Since I brought this subject up, something that was always discussed in almost every family conversation was my relationship with Claire. Was there something wrong with it? Of course not, except for the fact that we had not made anything official and were a laughingstock when we addressed each other as boyfriend or girlfriend. It was obvious that we were more than that now, after all, we already had a daughter, a family, and had been living together as husband and wife for almost four years. So what was the problem? We weren't worried about official titles or a piece of paper that made everything we already thought was real. Our relationship was never normal, never the same as others, and we were happy that way.

That day I left the distillery early, I couldn't wait to tell Claire about my plans. I didn't know how she would take what I had in mind, but now it was too late to cancel, Jenny and Ian already knew and it would be impossible to go back and make a pregnant woman angry. Yes, my sister was pregnant once again, and let's just say that the news was not taken so well at first, which resulted in Ian sleeping on our couch for a few days after being sent back to London to think about what he had done, or in this case, not done. Jenny had asked him to have a vasectomy after young Ian was born, but it seems that fear of surgery made him give up at the last moment. He just forgot to tell his wife about it.

When I got home, I knew my girls were already there with the singing coming from the bathroom. Bree loved to sing while she took a bath, singing all the songs from all the princess movies she knew. I was thankful that she didn't take my lack of tune or ear for music because otherwise it would be even worse to hear the music from Frozen or Moana ten times a day. I walked into the bathroom and couldn't help but smile when I saw Claire sitting beside the tub while our daughter gave an award-worthy performance of the song as she rinsed the foam off her body. She was definitely in the right family.

“That way ye will be in the next Disney movie, leannan.” I said as I leaned on the bathroom door.

“Jesus Roosevelt Christ!” Claire said, startled. She had not yet learned the subtlety of the Frasers.

“No Mama, it's Da!” Bree said seriously and couldn't help but laugh. Claire looked angry at first, but couldn't resist the indignant look on her daughter's face that didn't understand why I was laughing.

“Taking advantage of the fact that my girls are together, I have some news to tell ye! Tomorrow we are going on a trip!” Claire got up to grab the towel to get Bree out of the tub, but her gaze wouldn't leave mine. “We're going to Lallybroch!”

“Lallyboch!” Bree shouted, arms up in the air.

“Jamie! Don't you think we need to talk about this first?” Claire was angry, I could tell by the look in her eyes, but I also knew that if we were going to talk, she would come up with a thousand reasons why this trip couldn't happen, as she had done before.

Since Brianna was born, we had not been to Scotland. At first the reason was obvious, our daughter still needed to gain weight, size and strength to face life's challenges. Then it was the expansion of the flower shop that took up all of Claire's time and mine too, as I helped her a lot with the more technical details of everything. Then came the increased demand from the distillery, not only with whisky orders, but also with the launching of wine. Jenny and Ian tried to visit us on holidays, they insisted that we could no longer spend these dates alone now that we had our little girl. And there was nothing to complain about, they never missed a Christmas or any of Bree's birthdays. But I wanted her to see the place where I was born, grew up, and spent the best moments of my childhood. I knew she would have fun running around all that space, and she loved playing with her cousins, even though they were much bigger and sometimes not very patient.

“You know I can't stay away from the shop for many days and there's the distillery, isn't now the busiest time of year?” Claire peppered me with questions as soon as she picked Bree up and carried her to her room.

“I've already taken care of everything. That's why I hired a manager, Sassenach, to take care of everything while I spend a few days with my family, days that are well deserved and more than needed! I ken you want to go to Lallybroch as much as I do, and Mary has told me that she has everything under control, and the flower shop won't explode with ye gone, and ye ken it.” I tried my best to smile, I knew that would convince her.

“This is a cheap shot and you know it! Especially after talking in front of her.” she spoke softly while pointing her head toward our daughter. “She will never forget "Lallyboch".

“Lallyboch!” Bree loudly repeated what her mother had said, and I giggled at Claire's frustration at seeing her daughter happy with my news.

And so we packed all the things for our trip. Of course, I only told her that we would drive when everything was ready and with Claire outside the apartment, so that she wouldn't have to fight with me and give up everything. As usual I was wrong. When we got into the car she made a point of expressing all her displeasure that we were making the car trip with a three year old child. But she soon ran out of arguments when she saw that our daughter slept as soon as we left London. Riding in a car was practically a sleeping pill for Brianna and I was thankful that she took her mother's heavy sleep.

The hours went by and Claire was relaxing. We began to remember our first and only trip together, when we took this same route on a motorcycle. Little did we know at that time that going to Lallybroch would change everything in our lives, a tumultuous change, but more than welcome. For the first time we told each other what we were feeling during the motorcycle trip, what we thought at each moment, at each stop, and it was fun to see that even though we did not express ourselves clearly, we both had the same thing in mind: happiness. This is what we felt during the entire trip and stay in Scotland.

As we were approaching the destination I had in mind, Bree woke up and made it clear that she was hungry and tired of sitting in her seat. I knew that we were already at the limit of patience that a three-year-old girl could have for being inside a car. Lucky for me, I was already close to where we were going to stop for something to eat and follow my plan. When I stopped the car, she looked at me confused and only when she looked outside did she recognize the place. We were again on the outskirts of Castle Caerlaverock, where we had a picnic and probably scared all the children with our more than warm make out session.

I got out of the car and while Claire got Bree out of her chair, I grabbed the things I had left separated in the trunk. Like last time, I spread a plaid tablecloth under the big tree that provided us with more than pleasant shade on that atypically hot day. The difference was that now the food was much better. Oh, the company was also something I couldn't compare. Claire's smile at seeing all that had been put together was worth all the angry speech she had given me when we started the trip.

“You're annoyingly perfect, you know that?” she said, sitting down on the tablecloth while keeping an eye on Bree who was running across the lawn holding a cookie I had given her.

“I ken.” I laughed as I got a slap from my Sassenach. “But ye're perfect without being annoying...at least not all the time!”

She laughed and kissed me. We stood for a while just looking at each other and smiling. How nice it was to have a moment like that, with nothing to worry about, no work, no running around, just the scenery of Scotland all around us and our daughter's voice singing the Frozen song once again. Of course, the peacefulness didn't last long, because our little redhead was hungry and soon the distracting cookie ended. We had our picnic calmly, enjoying the family moment without any hurry. But I could no longer contain my anxiety, I had to do what I had planned before my heart burst out of my chest. I took the moment when Claire leaned against the tree to rest, to call Bree close to me and begin to put our plan into action.

While Claire remained with her eyes closed, almost asleep, I picked up my cell phone and selected the song I had chosen for that moment. "All Of Me" by John Legend began to play and I approached my Sassenach. She opened her eyes when she noticed my presence next to her and smiled. I took her hand and made her look in the direction our daughter was coming from. Bree was concentrating, she walked slowly while holding the small velvet box in her hand. I felt Claire's hand squeeze mine and I didn't have to look at her to know that she was excited. Our girl kept walking towards us and suddenly everything happened in slow motion. Bree tripped over something in the grass and the box in her hand fell over.

“Oops.” she said as she saw what had happened. But without losing her posture, she picked up the box again and with quick steps reached Claire, handing her the precious item with a smile on her face. The smile that I knew very well, the smile of someone who was apologizing for having done something wrong, the smile that I always wore with Claire and that our daughter had learned very well.

Claire smiled back at Bree, she had tears in her eyes, but was trying to cover them up so that our daughter wouldn't notice. But all her control was in vain when I took the box from her hand and opened it, displaying a simple, yet meaningful ring. She knew that ring, it was her mother's engagement ring, the ring her father bought when he was still studying medicine and couldn't afford a large diamond. Henry chose the stone that matched the eyes of his future wife, the same eyes that Claire had inherited and that had made me fall in love with her. Whisky-colored eyes. Eyes that were now thrilled and waiting for my words.

“Sassenach...” I took a deep breath and smiled. “Will ye marry me?” I asked the question as simply as I could, I didn't need more to prove that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this woman. And she knew it.

“Of course I will!” she answered quickly and as soon as I put the ring on her finger she hugged me tightly, finally letting the tears fall.

“Mama!” we heard Bree speak loud and serious. “Are you sick? Da can play with you, so you can feel better.” she said looking at us both and it was almost impossible to hold back the laughter.

How could I not be happy? My girls were everything in my life and that made me the luckiest man in the world. And to think that this started with a simple flower delivery, a few shots of whisky, and a somewhat daring proposal.

_**The End...for now.**_  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I think you didn't expect that this was the last chapter! I know, I know, I should have told you before, but the good news is that I plan to write an epilogue, in fact, it was supposed to be written already, however a lot of things happened in my life and in the world that I couldn't focus to write the beautiful epilogue that I have in mind. I hope to do this soon and I also hope that you stick with me a little while! I have another story ready (oneshot) that I think I'll post while I have nothing new here, what do you think? And just another question, do you like Sam/Cait fics?


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